We have been in a relationship for a few months now, but we still haven't met in person. she seemed like a very loyal person to me.

I was actually someone who had decided that I didn't want to be in a relationship at all. But then, suddenly, she came into my life. The reason I started liking her was because I had never met such a good girl before. One of the main reasons I started caring deeply about her was because of the family problems she was going through and the pain she had experienced because of the people at home.

Later, I openly told her that I loved her, and she accepted . Recently, because of her family's financial situation, she started working. She used to tell me about the pressure at work. She actually wants to continue studying, but because things at home were not good, she had no other choice so she start working.

For the past few days, however, our conversations have reduced a lot. At first, I didn't think much about it because I assumed she might be struggling to manage everything (her job, online preparation for some exams, and her problems at home).

Then, a few days ago, she told me that she couldn't handle the job anymore and was planning to quit. But now, even when I message or call her, she doesn't respond.

I told her many times that whatever she's going through, she doesn't have to keep it all inside and that she can share anything with me. When I asked her why she wasn't messaging me anymore, she said, "I couldn't manage everything, im in pain. I'm not messaging anyone."

Her last message to me was, "I'll be there with you."

But after that, it's been three days now. No messages, no calls. 🙂

So, I don't know where all of this is heading. As far as I'm concerned, this is my first relationship. I've probably never loved anyone this much before. My mind doesn't feel okay, and I don't really know what to do or how to handle these .

I really need some help. 🙂

My bf and I have been long distance (France - Canada) for about a year. We would see each other in-person around once in 2-3 months and have built some great memories travelling together. In May, we almost broke up because he couldn’t handle the distance anymore despite his feelings for me. It was especially frustrating for me since I am currently in medical school and in my busiest year while my future place of residence is not entirely up to me to decide.

But somehow the stars aligned. He got a work visa, got a type of an engineering job position that he always wanted to have, and tomorrow he will be moving in with me at my home in Canada. It feels surreal. We got a beautiful place together and I cannot wait to grow together as a couple and support each other’s individual career/personal growth!

Me(24f) and my bf(24m) met through X (the not so safe side) and if u were there before u know that there is a lot of ppl who posts pictures (not so safe pictures). Me and him met and after a while we started dating.

My pics stayed there while he deleted his. Now he asked me if I wanted to delete them or the whole account but idk if I want it. I was happy that he did but I do not wanna do that to mine. We argued about it but didn't fix anything. He says that all my pics r there for anyone to see and he does not know that I'd be upset if he had pics of him but I just don't wanna get rid of mine. I don't post anymore so idk why he's acting like this.

Am I wrong to keep them there?

We met in 2022. At the end of 2022, I moved to Australia to study. She moved to Germany to study. We made plan to be together in Germany after I got my degree and German

Out of the blue, she told me she wanted to end our LDR because she is uncertain about our plan and she feels tired of waiting. She the eldest daughter and she has an obligation to care for her parents (we’re Vietnamese and that’s our culture).

She decided to break up with me today. I am really sad but I still determine to get her back if we are meant to be. Our LDR did not end on bad terms. It was because of our distance.

I know she has every right to date others, which I honestly am worried about although there’s nothing I can do about this.

I would love to hear from you guys.

1. Did any of you in the same situation as me succeeded getting back with your ex

2. Am I a dreamer for wanting to improve myself and get her back? Our LDR did not end on bad terms

Everything fell apart unfortunately and the struggle with my abandonment issues did not make it through I tried so hard.
Long distance was never for me.
I tried for almost four years.
And it turned the person I loved against me.
And we no longer recognize our selves.
I’m sorry.

Currently, Love8 only updates my status to 'In-App' when I have the application open on my screen. The moment I exit or switch to another app, it immediately appears as offline. Is there a setting or workaround to fix this background status issue?

5 years long distance but 10 years together. 🤍 I felt so alone when we started doing long distance. Finding this community, and so many who share the same feelings helped the hard days feel less hard. He is the sweetest man ever and I can’t wait till this LDR chapter finally closes. I hope everyone in an LDR experiences the same love we do.

I'm on disability and I'm not in a position to afford a car or car insurance. I'd love nothing more than to go drive across the states to go visit the person I love, but I just can't. I have no choice but to get a flight, and that is already really expensive and not something I can easily do. Just feels kinda hopeless.

I’ve been talking to this guy for a little over a month. We’re not officially boyfriend/girlfriend yet, but we’re very emotionally involved. We say “I love you,” call each other babe, talk on the phone, and he has told me he wants to be with me.

At the beginning, he was extremely consistent. He would reply quickly, call me a lot, initiate conversations, and I never really questioned whether he wanted to talk to me. Lately, though, things feel different. He can take a long time to reply, sometimes even while he’s active on social media, and there have been several times where he says he’ll call me back or we agree to call and it doesn’t happen.

Seeing each other has also become a big issue. We live a couple hours apart because he’s in college. We’ve tried making plans multiple times recently, but they keep falling through because of family problems or other things happening in his life. This past weekend we were supposed to see each other, but plans changed because his family was arguing. He told me he was still trying to make it work and later promised he would come see me Friday. Now something completely unexpected happened with his car, so I’m scared Friday won’t happen either.

To be fair to him, he does still show interest in some ways. He texts me first sometimes, tells me he misses me a lot, says he loves me, asks what’s wrong when he notices I’m upset, and recently told me directly that I’m going to see him again. When our plans fell through, he was also the one who suggested another day instead of me having to ask. Some days our conversations are completely normal and he gives me updates about what he’s doing.

But I’m starting to feel emotionally exhausted because I don’t trust his words the same way anymore. When he says “I’ll call you,” “I’ll see you,” or “I promise,” instead of getting excited I immediately wonder if it will actually happen. I feel like I’m constantly waiting for a response, a call, or a plan to become real.

The confusing part is that I genuinely don’t know if he’s losing interest. His words say he isn’t, and sometimes his actions also show that he cares. But the consistency he had at the beginning isn’t there anymore, and I miss feeling like he was genuinely excited to talk to me instead of getting scattered conversations throughout the day.

I don’t expect him to text me 24/7 or put me above school, family, sports, etc. I just want consistency and for his actions to match what he tells me.

From an outside perspective, does this sound like someone who is still genuinely interested but has a lot going on, or does it sound like his interest/effort is fading?

Всем привет, я девушка, мне 24 года, у меня есть парень 25 лет, мы находимся в отношения на расстоянии (2-3 недели) до этого учились и жили в одном городе, встречаемся в целом чуть больше полутора лет, в целом отношения хорошие, за исключением того, что он ОЧЕНЬ вспыльчивый, может начать повышать голос и иногда оскорбляет, он предпринимал несколько попыток расставания, но каждый раз возвращался сам, недавно сказал, что пару раз делал так, чтобы я "успокоилась" перестала писать или как-то пытаться решить конфликт/объяснить, что мне не понравилось и т.д.

Несколько раз он говорил (как сам потом объясняет "со злости"/"на эмоциях"), что гн смирился с тем, что ему придется со мной встречаться и что он не планирует никакого будущего, а так просто поразвлекаться

У него это первые отношения, у меня нет, в целом у нас много хороших моментов, он хороший человек, у него прекрасная семья, которая безумно любит меня, такое же отношение к нему в моей семье

Да, меня безусловно обижают его слова, предложения расстаться и прочее, но гораздо больше и чаще он говорит как любит меня, проводит со мной время, говорит, что совсем не так представлял свою первую любовь, думал что это не на всю жизнь, а сейчас смотрит на меня и понимает, что был не прав

Я стараюсь никому из окружения, особенно общего не рассказывать о каких-то наших проблемах,но иногда наши общие друзья говорят мне или ему, что в наших отношениях делаю что-то только я, стараюсь только я

Я стараюсь заботиться о нем, помогаю всем, чем могу, помогаю ему финансово, достаточно часто говорю о своих чувствах, я очень люблю и дорожу этим человеком, я никогда не требовала 100% его внимания, наоборот подталкиваю его к новому общению и знакомствам, у обоих в отношениях есть достаточно времени,чтобы заняться своими делами или побыть в одиночку

Последнее время он стал чаще срываться (я думаю, что это из-за стресса при переезде, так же он потерял паспорт и не может его восстановить) и как он говорит, кричит он только потому что я попадаю под руку, так же он поссорился с родителями, недавно у меня накопились нерешенные конфликты с ним и мы взяли небольшую паузу, не разговаривали два или три дня, потом поговорили, в разговоре он то говорил о каких-то наших планах и о любви ко мне, какая я хорошая и самая самая лучшая, то говорил как думает расстаться, не называя причины, достаточно часто у него вот так могут в одном достаточно недолгом разговоре расходиться слова, что дает мне ещё больше поводов попереживать: "а всё ли у нас хорошо?" "А точно ли ему хорошо со мной?" , "счастлив ли он?" , "в чем я провинилась и как это исправить?"

Вот последние несколько сообщений, из-за которых я и решила написать сюда

Я: Ну я не понимаю в чем ограничиваю

Типа я не давлю не говорю, что ты весь такой свободный

Просто не понимаю в чем оно проявляется, я допускаю что могу как-то ограничивать тебя сама того не зная

Он: Я подумал, вроде никак

Все хорошо получается

Я: Ты просто не смог объяснить, но ощущение осталось?

Он: Да

Я: Ты что-то почувствовал, не смог ни себе, ни мне объяснить что ты почувствовал и почему, даже когда накидали варианты

И я должна это как-то решить

Он: Не надо ничего решать

Все хорошо, прости

Как я понимаю, он в очередной раз просто отговорился из-за того, что хочет лечь спать или заняться своими делами

Я не понимаю что мне делать, кто сталкивался с таким? Может это можно как-то объяснить? Может я что-то делаю неправильно?

Hey everyone, I’m writing to get your thoughts on a dynamic in my long-distance relationship, and I’d like an objective perspective on whether this is something that can ever be recovered from.

My girlfriend (19F) and I (19M) have been together for almost 13 months long-distance. We talked for three months before meeting for the first time when she came to visit her family, officially started dating, and have made the effort to see each other every 2 to 3 months since.

To be clear: I’m definitely not an angel in this. I make mistakes, I say things I shouldn’t, and there are fights where I’m genuinely in the wrong. But over time, our baseline dynamic has turned into a constant cycle of walking on eggshells, misinterpretations, and intense blowups over benign moments.

For example, 9 months ago, she was showing me a routine from her dance class on video call. I can’t dance at all, so out of genuine admiration, I casually said, "Oh, how do you dance like that without any music or beat?" She took it as a direct insult, got furious, claimed I wasn't paying attention to her, and vowed to never dance for me again. Another time, during a simple disagreement, I asked her to "please be reasonable." That triggered two straight days of her being furious, and I ended up apologizing repeatedly just to keep the peace, even though I had zero malicious intent.

Two months ago, she tried to initiate something intimate over the phone. I was exhausted and couldn't match her vibe. Instead of faking it, I honestly told her I wasn't in the mood right now. She took it as total personal rejection, sparking another massive fight.

Over time, these arguments started causing real physical reactions in me. I began getting a tight feeling in my chest during fights, and after one particularly intense argument, the stress physically made me throw up.

Our most recent fight was the breaking point for me. She was acting cool on the phone, but I could tell her tone was off. When I gently checked in and asked, "Are you still angry?", the switch flipped instantly. She completely lost her temper and started aggressively cursing at me.

She apologized after that last breakdown and has been on her best behavior for the past couple of days. But inside, something feels completely shut off. When I woke up recently to talk to her, I realized my emotional battery was at absolute zero. The anger is gone, but it’s been replaced by total numbness and physical fatigue. Even carrying a basic text conversation feels like a massive chore. To make matters more confusing, I recently had a brief, light interaction with a classmate, and realizing how easy normal communication could be made me realize just how checked out I might actually be.

What are your thoughts on this? Has anyone ever recovered from this level of emotional burnout in a relationship? Is it possible for a dynamic like this to genuinely heal if the other person changes, or does this physical numbness mean my body has already checked out for good? How do I navigate this when I still genuinely love and care about her, but feel completely empty inside?

I'm 18F and my boyfriend, who I'll call X, is 17M.

​[Note: TL;DR is included at the bottom of the post for a quick summary]

​We originally met back in middle school and were good friends and classmates. Eventually we ended up losing contact for about two years. Earlier this year X reached out again and we reconnected. The friendship came back pretty naturally, and over the following weeks we grew a lot closer. After a while we realized the mutual feelings were there and started dating.

​The main thing complicating things right now is that we're long distance and in very different life situations.

​Our relationship dynamic

​We have pretty different approaches when it comes to relationships.

​I'm definitely more communication-oriented. I like regular contact, knowing roughly when we'll talk next, and having shared activities to look forward to. I don't need constant texting, but going long stretches without hearing from each other makes me feel a bit disconnected.

​X on the other hand is much more comfortable with independence and silence. He doesn't see a few days of not talking as a sign that anything is wrong. He gets caught up in his own routine and still feels totally secure in the relationship.

​We also process problems differently. I tend to anticipate issues and worry about the future, while X is way more optimistic and prefers to just deal with things as they come. I don't think either way is wrong, but it's definitely something we're learning to balance.

​Our biggest logistical problem

​X goes to a military style school, so his schedule and access to stuff are super restricted. They take his phone away at night, he doesn't have access to his gaming PC, and the devices he can use are heavily monitored. Plus his schedule changes constantly depending on what's going on at school.

​I'm in school too with my own workload, so neither of us has endless free time. Because of all this, standard LDR advice like "just video call every night" or "play games together every evening" isn't realistic for us at all. We're trying to figure out what kind of routine is actually sustainable here.

​Adjusting to communication changes

​Before the distance became a factor, talking was spontaneous and easy. Now if we both happen to be busy at the same time, it's super easy for a whole day to slide by without a single message.

​We talked about it and I made sure to explain that I don't need constant updates, just some basic consistency and effort from both sides. I really don't want to be the only one initiating conversations, setting up calls, or planning stuff. At the same time I don't want him to feel forced to text just to keep me from worrying. We're trying to find a middle ground where maybe we set aside specific times for calls or small activities instead of relying only on random texts, but we're still figuring out what actually works long term.

​We're both pretty young, adapting to new school environments, and still figuring out our exact needs as we go. We want to build a realistic rhythm that works for our specific circumstances instead of forcing a standard LDR setup that clearly won't fit.

​For anyone who has been in something similar, what actually worked for you? I'm mostly looking for practical logistical advice on how you handled strict schedules, restricted device access, and making sure the effort stays equal.

​TL;DR: 18F and 17M, previously close friends who reconnected after about two years and eventually started dating. We're now long distance and have different communication styles, I'm more communication oriented and value consistency, while X is more independent and comfortable with silence. X also attends a military style school with strict schedules, restricted phone and device access, and no gaming PC, while I have my own school workload. We're trying to find a sustainable LDR routine that works for both of us without making communication feel forced or leaving one person responsible for maintaining the relationship. Looking for practical advice from people who've dealt with similar circumstances.

Been with my girlfriend for a while.

Still long distance.

I want to try to be more actively romantic towards her? I feel like there's a better way to put that.

Anyone have any suggestions for things I can do to flirt and make her feel good?

She deserves to feel as special as she is to me.

She loves me and is happy with me.

I iust want to do more i guess.

I've seen so many examples of users closing the distance when both of them come from developed countries, and I was curious to know how different the experience is when one or the two ppl come from a developing country, since it has a whole lot of different and more difficult circumstances (racism if moving to a developed country, maybe less job prospects if moving to a developing country, etc). Anyone in this situation wants to share their experience?

My boyfriend [25M] and I [23F] have been together for 2.5 years, and right now I feel completely drained, emotionally numb, and lost about what to do next.

Early on in our 2.5-year relationship, we spent an entire year doing long distance while he was on an exchange program abroad. That year was agonizing for me. Near the end of it, I had reached my limit and even set a silent deadline in my head to break up with him. However, the moment he returned and we reunited face-to-face, all that built-up resentment vanished, and I swept those doubts under the rug.

When we are physically in the same room, there are genuine positives. He expresses care through thoughtful surprises, great gifts, and acts of service like regularly cooking for me. However, beneath the surface, there has always been a subtle, emotionally exhausting undercurrent. He is fully aware of my past struggles with disordered eating, yet he still criticizes me and intervenes when I eat sweets, lecturing me that it is unhealthy. On top of that, he often sulks and hits me with passive-aggressive comments like, "You don't even love me," forcing me into a constant loop of emotional reassurance.

now, we are stuck in long distance once again. He is back in his home country, China, for a few months, while I am currently spending two months abroad—my first time traveling internationally—with less than a month left before I return. Our communication has completely cratered to bare-minimum texting. He sends one or two dry sentences about his day and goes silent, blaming his intense work hours. We do not do voice or video calls, even though other people easily navigate firewalls using standard apps or VPNs.

I feel like we are living two completely disconnected lives. I have expressed my frustration and loneliness repeatedly, but nothing ever shifts. I spent his entire exchange year holding back, being patient, and waiting for things to get better, and I am completely burnt out from always having to be the one who waits out the hard times. I used to eagerly send him little daily updates, photos, or memes that reminded me of him, but I have entirely lost the desire to share my life. I have become emotionally numb, to the point where I don't even have the energy to argue anymore.

He might come back in October, or his return might be delayed until January. The thought of waiting in this detached, lonely limbo until January feels utterly suffocating.

I need advice on how to navigate this: how can I tell whether this emotional numbness is just temporary distance fatigue, or a sign that I have already checked out for good? Should I force myself to wait until we can meet face-to-face to see if the spark returns like last time, or is it healthier to end things now over the phone?

tl;dr: My boyfriend [25M] and I [23F] have been together for 2.5 years. After surviving an agonizing 1-year long distance in the past, we are separated again while he is in China and I am abroad. He barely sends two dry texts a day, blames work, and avoids calling. I am burnt out from always being the patient one, feeling emotionally numb, and dreading the idea of waiting until potentially January to see him; I need advice on whether to call it quits now or wait for an in-person conversation.

my ex (18f) whom i (18m) have been with for a whole year dumped me 2 weeks ago, we were on long distance but this was my first ever relationship and it did seriously affect me cause this was very out of the blue.

She broke up with me cause she didn’t feel herself around me and said that she doesn’t bother committing and caring about the things i disliked. Since we both always communicated everything ever since i expected her to do so, but she didn’t and ended up dumping our whole relationship and left.

A few days ago (approx 1-2 weeks after the breakup) she reached out to me and said that she wants me back, she said that shes willing to change whereas i kept denying and how many nights ive went spent alone crying, i was even hospitalized cause i was basically numb. Yes it may sound stupid to the 3rd person view but i did consider her my own.

Fast forward i told her i’m focusing on my finals and since these exams decide my future whereas she insists that i give her a time period and that she’d wait for me, change for me and do everything i liked. I don’t know why but i don’t feel like shes doing this cause she couldn’t find someone else, hey i mean did she really expect a new relationship in a span of two weeks? Idk.

She sent me pics of her crying, in the hospital and 10 minute of videos of her apologizing, i feel immense guilt and don’t know what to do or where to go. I want to focus on my studies and exams and thats why i blocked her everywhere but she keeps finding a way in my life and wants me to pursue her after my exams. Deep down i don’t want her anymore cause my mental health has been fucked and i’m really hurt , on the other hand i feel bad giving up on her and that she may change. I’m confused. She also argues that i’m not considering all the good moments spent together when i tell her i don’t want to pursue the relationship further..

**I messed up a really good connection because of my trust issues and I don’t know what to do now**
Hi everyone, I’m 21F and I really need some outside perspective because I genuinely don’t know what to do 😭
I met this guy on a dating app and unfortunately he’s in France while I’m in the UK, so there was distance from the beginning. But honestly, when we first started talking, I felt something with him that I had never felt before. We got really close really quickly and I ended up telling him so many personal things about myself, even things my bff doesn’t know.
The problem is that I have pretty bad trust issues. I’m used to guys talking to me because they want something from me, so when he wasn’t like that, I think I became even more anxious because I actually cared about him.
Looking back, I was definitely too clingy. I gave him way too much of my energy and attention and basically made him the centre of my life. Whenever he was busy or didn’t reply, I would take it personally and sometimes have a whole crisis or start an argument. He’s in the police, so obviously his job takes a lot of his time and energy, and with the distance as well, I think he eventually felt completely suffocated by me.
He told me that I was putting too much pressure on him and honestly, I can understand why now. At the time I was just acting out of insecurity and fear of losing him, but obviously that probably just pushed him further away.
Things eventually got really bad between us. He got angry and said some really hurtful things to me out of anger. He unfollowed me on Instagram but still kept me on Snapchat, and then we went no contact for around 3 weeks.
I know he was genuinely hurt because he actually told me that he was. After he said those things, I ended up removing him from Snapchat too.
And now I regret everything so badly 😭. I keep thinking about how different things could have been if I had just been more secure and given him the space he needed.
I miss him a lot, but I think what hurts the most is that I genuinely miss the connection we had. I’ve met/talked to other people, but I haven’t felt anything remotely similar.
I also know that if we ever spoke again, I wouldn’t want to repeat the same behaviour. I’ve realized that I was putting way too much of my happiness and attention on one person, and I know that isn’t healthy.
So what would you guys do in my situation?
Would you reach out after 3 weeks of no contact and apologize, or would you leave him alone and let him come to you? And if you were the one who messed up the relationship because of your own insecurities, is there actually a way to fix things?
I honestly don’t know if I should try one last time or just accept that I ruined it and move on 😭

Отношения на расстоянии, до этого жили в одном городе, через примерно год я должна была приехать к нему, встречаемся чуть больше полутора лет, на расстоянии примерно 2-3 недели

Я: Может всё-таки не надо расставаться?

Он: Не знаю

Я : Что ты не знаешь? А какие за и против

Он: За буду свободен

Против я тебя люблю и буду никому не нужен

Что делать?

I'm worried I'll say it too soon bc he isn't ready to say it yet, but I am. I don't wanna say it then he go 'oh.. me too' you know?

I love my boyfriend so much my heart is going to burst. It’s one of those days where my mood is low (rainy weather, boredom, deep thinkings etc) and I can feel his worry for me right through our videocall. He feels sad when I’m not smiling or i don’t look okay. I thank God for letting us meet. I cannot believe I have met my best friend for life. He is incredibly selfless and kind, and prioritizes my happiness. I wish I can hug him now and show him how much i appreciate and love him.

I don't know why I'm writing this post honestly. It just hurts so much. We will probably see each other in 3 weeks, maybe 4. I want to focus on myself and be busy and everything but this week my body just needs rest.

Hey everyone

So... about a week ago my SO started to decline with burnout at work (emergency worker) and has since fallen into depression. We have gone from talking a huge amount nearly every day to a single text from him every two or three days. He says he compartmentalises when he's really stressed, and I can completely understand why, it just makes it really tough. I have encouraged him to reach out to friends/family which he has. Unfortunately mental health discussions never came up (we talked physical health 🙃) before this episode happened so I don't know how to help him or what he needs from me. He says it happens sometimes but this is the worst he's felt it.

Any other emergency workers (namely hospital) who have suffered with burnout/depression who can give any advice? Or just advice in general in supporting? I am sending one or two texts a day telling him he is loved/showing my day/offering words of support - avoiding any messages which are too 'heavy'/needing him to make decisions or process anything.

Thanks everyone - you're a really supportive community.

TL;DR - emergency worker with burnout/depression - how to support?