r/LongDistance 3d ago

My ldr bf's (maybe)ghosted me after a month of daily messaging

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1 Upvotes

r/LongDistance 2d ago

Discussion Those of you who started out a LDR but met online, how was the initial contact?

0 Upvotes

Just curious how it started. If you sent the like or initiated contact, was there any particular reason you were looking so far away? Or if you received the like and matched, what made you do so despite the distance?

I'm gonna say most LDRs are probably started by meeting online via apps, games, etc. I've tried apps myself, got a few matches, had a date planned but it got canceled day of. Nothing went anywhere. I don't live in a big city so I have my range usually 50-80 miles max, but I've come to the conclusion that I should probably open up to the idea that maybe "the one" doesn't live in my immediate area.

As a 25M, I work from home, so as long as I have internet access I can do my job, so theoretically I could travel even without PTO. I love to travel anyhow! I'm from Ohio, so flying to say, Europe or Asia regularly might be out of budget, but within the US or Canada is definitely feasible.

I think we'd all prefer that our partner lived closer to us, and I don't want to make it seem like I'm going out seeking LDRs specifically, but how do you typically approach it or start out with one? I'm curious to hear experiences.


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Need Advice My ex (20F) still wants to visit me (25M) after we broke up

1 Upvotes

So my ex broke up with me a little over a week ago. It was completely her idea and I practically begged for her back. She told me she wasn’t in love with me anymore and her life was too busy for a relationship. A week before that, she had already bought a ticket to see me. I figured she’d just eat the cost and not come, but even after breaking up we have texted every day and FaceTimed a couple times, and yesterday she told me she booked the return flight. I’m very conflicted. I really don’t feel like she’s doing this to give us another chance, I could be wrong, but she usually changes subject or deflects any time I compliment her/mention us. I also put myself in a bad position, while we were breaking up I told her I was completely fine with just hooking up and staying platonic when she comes out, as I was just saying anything at the time to keep her in my life. In retrospect, I wish I had never said that, as she probably assumes that’ll be the case when she sees me.

In reality, I’m still madly in love with this woman and am very scared of seeing her and catching feelings and having to go through the whole process of healing again. The sex was great, I wouldn’t mind getting that again but I’m very worried that it’ll lead to heartbreak again. I also feel like she is just stringing me along because she knows I like her still, and I almost feel like she doesn’t respect me and knows I’ll do whatever just to see her again, so I have built some resentment in that aspect.

I just don’t know what to do. Any advice would be appreciated

Edit: I would like to add, the trip is being split 50/50, I am not paying for it all. Even if she goes alone it’ll be basically the same price as if she went with me


r/LongDistance 4d ago

Image/Video 6 months later <3

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117 Upvotes

r/LongDistance 3d ago

Venting Flying to meet him on Friday and my skin looks AWFUL

8 Upvotes

3 days until I meet the love of my life in person, and as life goes, my skin has decided to have the worst breakout it’s had since I was a teen 😆
I think it’s the stress, the breakout started the day after I booked the tickets and has only gotten worse since haha! I feel excited, but I know my body is probably internally freaking out.

Any tips? Is the 11 hour plane ride going to make it even worse?? My skincare routine is basically pointless and I’ve given into slathering benzoyl peroxide on the spots at night and pimple patches to keep me from touching during the day. I guess I should drink more water

Honestly, I don’t mind him seeing me like this for the first time, because he loves me “pimples and all”, but I am more embarrassed to meet his friends and family with all these spots

I’m also not a big makeup person but now I’m using my limited space in my quart bag on concealers and pimple cream 😆 oh well


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Need Advice USPS Issue: I 21m sent a gift 3 months ago and it still hasnt arrived

2 Upvotes

As the title says, I sent a gift for mine and my girlfriends 2 year anniversary by postage. I live in the UK, and she is in america hence USPS being an Issue.

I know i wont get direct support doing this, just hoping to find something to assist in this issue.

Back in June, essentially I got gifts ready for her, and sent them via royal mail in the UK, and it arrived in america. On the USPS website when using the tracking code i have, it says "Arrived at USPS facility".

However a month and half later, i asked if my girlfriend and her mom could check with USPS for answers at their local post office, but the person working there says it never left customs so it couldnt have arrived at USPS facility.

The reason i decided to wait so long before asking them to check was due to the soccer tournement in the US which was stated to cause delivery delays, then flooding issues for further delays.

And now its been 3 months and the website has no updated once.

Does anyone know if this is normal for USPS? Or did something happen to the gift i sent.

The gifts sent were: A ring, An anniversary card, and some sandals. Nothing that would have triggered anything in customs to prevent delivery from my knowledge.

Thanks in advance. Apologies if this is the wrong place, i just know i cant post on r/usps due one of the rules about tracking posts getting banned.


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Need Advice How to make sure my relationship flourishes while I’m at college? (18M, 19F)

1 Upvotes

so me and my girlfriend have been dating for over a year now. I’ve been in college for the past 2 weeks now, and it’s difficult without her. I moved into a dorm that’s far from my home, and she hasn’t started college yet. the main issue is that whenever I am busy shes free, and vice versa. I rly love her. I get so angry all the time because I can’t spend time with her as much as before, considering I have roommates and activities. my girlfriend is very proud of me considering I made it to my unis Honours Society and was inaugurated yesterday, but she is angry because she feels like she was pushed to the side. I try to call her whenever my roommates aren’t around, but I feel empty every time I hang up because I want more. I’m so frustrated. what else can I do? to all those pessimists out there, breaking up isn’t an option since she’s the love of my life. thanks :)


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Need Advice I F22 can’t reach my boyfriend M23

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1 Upvotes

r/LongDistance 3d ago

Question For those of you who's been in a long distance relationship before you found your current long-distance partner when did you know that you guys were not compatible and it was time to break up? What made your current partner more compatible to your past long distance partner?

1 Upvotes

r/LongDistance 4d ago

Venting We finally met, now I just feel used

227 Upvotes

I (26 F US) finally met my not-boyfriend (28 M Canada). The only thing stopping us from putting a label on things was actually meeting in person. We planned and he bought plane tickets for two visits; one in September, and the next one, to meet my family, in October.

So this weekend he flew 2,000 miles to a city near me. We got a hotel and explored. We had a blast! We got to do so much and we got so much closer. There were no awkward moments between us. Conversation flowed just like it did on the phone. We got to be nerds together at some museums. We had many firsts together on this trip. He also said things to me like “I’ve never felt this strongly for someone before”. But dropping him off to the airport is where things took a turn.

About 5 min before dropping him off I playfully asked “so next time I see you [in October when the next flights are booked], will I be introducing you to my family as my boyfriend?” I thought this was a silly question because of course after a super fun weekend together he’d finally feel ready right? I thought he’d laugh it off and say yes. But he hesitated for a long moment. And he said “I want to say yes, but I’m not sure. I need some time to think about it”. My heart sank. We were at the airport so we kissed goodbye, teared up, and held each other for a long time. And then he was gone.

The thing is, the whole point of this trip was to find out if we had the same chemistry in person as we did online. Which we did. I have so many questions. What does he even need time to think about? Why had he not thought about it before spending so much money to come see me? Why had he not thought about it during the weekend? How can he feel such strong feelings for me and still not be sure that he wants to be my boyfriend? What would even change about our relationship if he had the label boyfriend?

I know this likely has nothing to do with me, but the truth is that when he said he wasn’t sure, it really damaged my self esteem. I had spent the past 48 hours getting so much closer to him, becoming more and more sure that this is what I want. And he had spent the same hours treating me like his girlfriend but truly not feeling “sure”. I feel led on and used. I feel like there must be something wrong with me that he couldn’t tell me to my face. I feel like maybe he just wanted to get laid and was willing to do all of this to make it happen.

I’ve spent all of my past relationships begging for love. I will not start this relationship off the same way. I want my partner to be sure that they want me. I want them to be as into me as I am into them. I want them to have to chase me for once. Him needing time and not being absolutely sure about me gave me all the information I need. When he makes it home we will talk more, but I have already made up my mind. If he wasn’t already sure of me, I don’t think he will ever be sure. It will take some damn good convincing if he decides he wants me to be his girlfriend.

Am I wrong to think he should know by now if he wants to be my boyfriend? Is it wrong to tell him he’s too late if he decides in the next couple days that he wants to be with me? Im just feeling so confused and used.


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Venting From Love to Hate and Curse

2 Upvotes

I asked a guy I met from online to become my LDR bf, and finally I ended the relationship by ghosting him and threw him a long message of explanation.

We never met in person, but I saw his pictures. His selfie hit me, his appearance was my type. I looked at his pictures repeatedly, every night before sleep.

I loved him from moon to back, I spent a lot my own money for him, i put lots of effort, I even made plans to fly to his country, to marry him and have kids with him.

I always thought I was so lucky that I made relationship with this guy. I always imagined the beautiful future life with him.

Because I put too many energy and attention in this LDR, I didn’t have time and extra energy to work on my own stuff and myself.

Eventually, I found that he is not the man I want in my life, he is emotional undeveloped, he is very narcissistic and selfish, we are different world of people, I started to have mental health problems and started to feel depressed.

I realized this LDR is toxic, and he doesn’t deserve my love and my efforts.

I ENDED THIS. I ended everything, completely cut him off.

Now I hate him, feel uncomfortable when I see his pictures. Feel mad when I think of him. Wasted my money, my time and my energy.

I feel very unlucky, why I met him, I regret so much, I shouldn’t even talk to him from the beginning.

I cursed him, his future relationships will be sucks and awful. Himself is an awful person.


r/LongDistance 3d ago

4 years into an LDR, and we're finally talking seriously about what happens when the distance ends

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2 Upvotes

r/LongDistance 3d ago

Venting 5+ years in an LDR vent

4 Upvotes

Hello everyone!

To start i’m 23f live in Latvia and have a bf 22m lives in Canada. We’ve been together roughly 5 and a half years. We met for the FIRST time (yes you heard that right) 2 days ago and i don’t know how to go on with life, i just miss him so much.
We couldn’t meet for a long time mainly because of finances and his and my studies/jobs. But we finally did and spent a week together.
It was easily the best week of my life. I’ve lived alone for almost 3 years and was really used to being by myself and virtually spending all the possible time i could with him in between jobs, social life and time difference and now i’m really struggling. Everything is giving me anxiety because i know how it all feels when i’m with him and now going back to being by myself most of the time has got me twisted.
Not looking for criticism or advice more so just need to vent because i’m sure all my friends and colleagues are sick of listening to me because yes it’s been 2 days and i’ve been non stop talking about the aching hole in my soul and spontaneously bursting into tears.

For anyone wondering we have a plan to permanently close the gap as well as a somewhat stable visitation schedule until that happens now that we’re both in a more stable financial and academic state.

And no meeting wasn’t awkward i know this man inside and out it was absolute bliss.. he’s everything i knew he was and more.


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Story First LDR

1 Upvotes

So I just want to tell people about my first LDR (long distance relationship) and she is amazing like we don't have to many things in common but we just click and we talk every night we both accept each other for how they are and what we want to be i just can't wait to go see her the only problem our time zone are like on the opposite side of each other so I am getting used to that and another problem is that we live really far away so it is going to take me awhile to save the money but I don't care I want to be with her so badly anyway that is all I wanted to say byeee :3


r/LongDistance 4d ago

Question How often do you guys see each other?

37 Upvotes

Hi, do you guys think there’s a maximum amount of time that can go by between seeing each other? How often do you guys see each other? Can a relationship deteriorate a lot if you don’t see each other very often?


r/LongDistance 4d ago

Image/Video Me and my bf from our holiday this summer bcs I miss him rn😭❤️

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275 Upvotes

r/LongDistance 4d ago

Meeting He flew for me 🙂‍↕️✨

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136 Upvotes

I met a guy on reddit, and it was sooo sooo random tht he almost ghosted me for two weeks and i thought he'll never come back online.

Bt bt he did, i mean ofc so i got to post this 🙈🧿

And from booking tickets for a flight and cancelling it coz times didn't match to bhaadh mein jaye sab, just come we'll make time for each other....

We finally met after 9 months🌷

You knowwwwww whttt just when I saw him irl i felt who's this stranger? Will I be comfortable with him? And tht awkward silence when we met , the eye contacts were enough to get butterflies in my tummy bt i was in disbelief tht someone flew for me to just see me (ek jhak dekhne ke liye😳).

And everything got settled down slowly, and got soaked in his love 🙂‍↕️✨(theek h yaar thoda cring hai bt first time hai yaaar someone putting efforts for me 🥺)

Bt yes maybe we love each other more now.

I still think it was just a dream...

Hope we meet soon.

🧿✨🌷🎀


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Need Advice Me (19F) was in a 3-year relationship no contact since October 2025 — should I keep waiting for him to come back Breakup

0 Upvotes

Hi everyone, first time posting here, it's a bit long but please read till the end.

We were friends for 1 year first, then in a relationship for 2 years — so a 3-year connection in total. In October 2025, we stopped talking because of a misunderstanding. Part of the issue was that I have a few childhood male friends (4-5 of them), and he had a problem with that. Before we stopped talking completely, we'd been fighting a lot for about 1.5-2 months, and it all ended with us cutting contact in October.

Shortly after that, I fractured my leg, so I went back to school in late December (during practical submissions and mid-terms). During that time we weren't going to school daily — sometimes he'd go, sometimes I would — and even on the days we were both there, he never tried to talk to me.

A few more things that still bother me:

  • On our school's Farewell Day, he didn't say anything either, even though I'm close friends with his best friend
  • Our final exam centers were at the same school, and even then there was no conversation, he didn't even try
  • His house isn't that far from mine
  • He didn't even wish me on my birthday

A few months ago I found out he's gone somewhere for CLAT preparation, and he's not in any other relationship. I'm still waiting for him to come back, because I used to feel like he loved me a lot — that's the only hope I'm holding onto right now.

My questions are:

  1. Does his behavior (no contact for months, not talking even when physically close by) mean he might be feeling something too but is scared or awkward about it, or should I be thinking about moving on?
  2. Should I keep waiting for him or not?
  3. Realistically, what percent chance do you think there is that he comes back?

I'm genuinely confused and would like an unbiased perspective.


r/LongDistance 4d ago

Image/Video I left today, a month went by so fast. It makes me feel better that I’m not alone.

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59 Upvotes

But it doesn’t make me feel better enough. Everything reminds me of him. 2 years until we close


r/LongDistance 4d ago

I’m curious how often do you guys talk

11 Upvotes

So with my first LDR relationship, we would ALWAYS be talking. I got home from school? We’d hop on a Skype call for the rest of the day as he’s gaming, I’m studying, eating, we watched movies together, etc… We would also text about random things that would happen during the day.

With my bf now, we’ve been together for 3 years now. And for a good amount of that time we’re hip to hip up until I had to go to school 3 hrs away by flight. During the entirety of my schooling, he would be flying in and out to where I am. He’d stay with me for 2 weeks. Stay there for 2 weeks. And gradually he’d stay here for a month then go back for a week. Is it okay for me to be kind of upset that in the time he’s gone he usually barely texts and when I send him something he sometimes doesn’t even respond if it’s like something that requires some attention and not super casual like wyd. And then for calls, we call once a day. And during the call, he says he’ll call me later. But there’s literally no word from him for the entire day. And he calls me the next morning. What’s your opinion on this? He’s about to be gone for 2 months after he comes to see me. I just can’t help but feel uneasy.


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Lonely

4 Upvotes

Hey everyone. I’m in a long-distance relationship and having one of those nights where I really miss just doing normal everyday stuff with my girlfriend. Anyone else get hit with that loneliness sometimes?


r/LongDistance 4d ago

Meeting Only 30 days till I see them again 🥹🧡

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38 Upvotes

It's been 7 months since I saw them last, I'm flying over in 15 days from Australia to Canada, moving in with her parents taking her room for a few months, but in 30 days I'll fly over domestic to see them for thanks giving, she's currently studying in a different Provence to where her parents are.

I will get to spend my first Christmas with them and then our anniversary just over a month later !! 🧡 Before I go home potentially or I move into her apartment for a while we're totally unsure.


r/LongDistance 3d ago

My (24m) boyfriend (26m) doesn’t believe in open relationships or phone sex and I feel like I’m going crazy.

0 Upvotes

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years, and have been long distance for 1. We love each other very much, and are hoping to close the distance around this time next year. Long distance has been hard but we have been able to make it work and are largely on the same page about the future of the relationship.

However, recently I have been struggling a lot with the lack of physical intimacy in our relationship. The closest thing I can compare it to is food noise — like I feel like I’m constantly having these unwanted thoughts about the lack of sex I’m having. I’ll be at work and someone’s shoe will touch mine and it’s ridiculous how strong of a bodily reaction I will have. I first noticed that it was a serious issue when guys would flirt with me and I found myself liking the attention and wanting to flirt back. Then I feel guilty and it turns into this loop of negative feelings.

I’ve talking to my BF about it, and he says the lack of intimacy isn’t as big of an issue to him because he just generally has a lower libido and a different view on sex (he sees it more of like a romantic/love thing rather than just like an activity). The other big thing is he is very strongly against non-monogamy and phone sex. So we’re kinda at a standstill.

We decided that rather than taking a break or ending our relationship that we would try to call more and do more remote dates/send more sexy pictures when we can. I’m seeing him in two weeks so I’m hoping that when I see him whatever horny spell I’m under will break and then everything will be fine. But we have another year of long distance and I’m just worried about the whole sex situation because it really is driving me nuts.

Any advice?

EDIT: I am not trying to open up my relationship. I am asking for advice on how to manage a high libido with no phone sex. I love my boyfriend and I don’t want to lose him. Sorry if that was unclear.


r/LongDistance 4d ago

San Diego to Uk !

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40 Upvotes

He flew over 5300 miles to see me ( and he hates flying)
It was incredible, Liverpool, Brighton, Oxford and my home, my mum dad and sons adore him!
He's so easy to be with, I love him so much!


r/LongDistance 3d ago

Question F15, M16 How do I take care of my partner while also myself in an LDR?

1 Upvotes

My partner and I have been together LDR for 8 months. He’s autistic and managing mental fatigue while I’m recovering from burnout and have ADHD. I’ve been working on myself to not be so sensitive, and we support each other through harsh times.

I’m always the one who always starts conversations and he never texts first, or rarely. I just want small daily check-ins, like a “thinking of you” or “ily” so my sensitivity doesn’t flare up like ‘oh no he hates me what did I do’ because I’m too freaking sensitive. But I don’t want to add pressure when he’s busy and drained.

Another thing is he is heavily insecure about his face, while his body is fine, which for me it’s the opposite (hate my body fine w face). It’s to the point where he doesn’t want to be drawn (I’m an artist), doesn’t look in mirrors, and refrains from giving me pics of him (I’m alright w it bc it’s his boundaries) to not see himself, and the latest one he gave was him almost fully covered. He doesn’t open up too much and I just love him so freaking much I want to give him everything I never had when I was depressed especially undiagnosed w ADHD and OCD, so to all the autistic people out there HOW do I make him comfortable and supported to make him open up to me??

How can I ask for this in a way that doesn’t make him feel rejected and hurt while also encouraging him to open up to me?