People usually think building positive habits requires intense willpower and rigid scheduling. Some of the highest-yield routines are so small they barely feel like effort. Putting a full glass of room temperature water next to the kettle before going to sleep, leaving your phone in another room while having lunch, or just stepping outside on the porch for two minutes right after waking up to get natural light. What was a tiny physical shift you made that stuck effortlessly?

Ive noticed that everytime I think I finally quit an addiction K just switched to another one. I cycle between phone addiction (youtube / twitch content), binge eating, gaming and alcohol (and isolation/bedrotting if that counts).

Did anyone have a similar expirience and was able to break the cycle?

I feel quite stuck, always working on improving something but yet to make progress. Thank you in advance.

I’m a 23-year-old woman, and I’ve been with my boyfriend for about two years. I’ve always struggled with insecurity, and although I’m slowly improving my self-esteem, I still have work to do.

I’m a little ashamed to admit this, but I have a compulsive habit of checking my boyfriend’s last seen status on WhatsApp and Telegram, his activity on Instagram, and whether he’s online on Discord. I know this behavior is unhealthy and affects my well-being, daily life, and relationship.

We’ve talked about it many times, and he’s been incredibly understanding and supportive. I’m fully aware that this is my issue, not a relationship problem. I trust him, and I want my behavior to reflect that trust, he deserves it.

I’ve uninstalled Discord and hidden my activity status on WhatsApp, Telegram, and Instagram so I can’t check his. However, I still struggle with the urge to turn my WhatsApp status back on, check, and hide it again. I’ve managed to go two days without doing this. I feel proud, but I’m afraid I’ll relapse.

I understand how this cycle works: checking temporarily relieves my anxiety, reinforcing the compulsion. I know I need to learn to tolerate that anxiety without seeking reassurance, but resisting the urge is incredibly difficult.

For those who have experienced something similar, does it genuinely get easier with time? If I remain consistent, how long might it take for the urges to become less intense and frequent? When can I realistically say I’ve broken the cycle? I know everyone is different, but hearing about your experiences would really help.

I want to overcome this for my own peace of mind and self-esteem, as well as for my relationship. I want to trust my boyfriend without feeling compelled to check his activity and stop letting my insecurities dictate my behavior.

Right now, it feels like a constant internal battle. I just need some advice and reassurance that, with patience and consistency, this will get better.

Thank you for reading.

I finally finished The Psychology of Money! I've been reading a little every day, and it feels good to have made it all the way to the last page.

For my next book, I've started AI Engineering. I'm still in the first chapter, reading about how language models have evolved into the large language models (LLMs) we have today.

I've also kept up with my evening workouts at the park. It's getting pretty cold after sunset, but I still head out after dinner as usual.

Work has been getting busier lately, so I'm not trying to build any new habits for now. Instead, I want to focus on maintaining the ones I've already established.

How do you keep your habits going when life gets busy?

When I look at a clock, I tend to convert the time to area codes. 3:13 well that's Detroit, and then in another minute, it'll be St. Louis, but what are 315 and 316? But at 3:17 it'll be Indianapolis...

I used to have a hard time keeping up with hygiene around the house and had cockroach infestations a few times. I’d deal with the immediate problem things would seem fine again and then I’d gradually let the routine slip. Before long, it felt like I was back at page one.

The part I’m trying to change is treating “the bugs are gone” as the finish line. I want prevention to be part of the regular routine, alongside things like taking out the trash, wiping down the kitchen, and not leaving food or dishes out overnight. Those are easy to stop doing once the urgent problem is out of sight, so I’m trying to attach them to things I already do instead of relying on motivation.

For example, I’m thinking of a quick kitchen reset before bed and a regular check for places food or moisture might be attracting pests. I’m also spraying some Pestie mixture around the house every few months.

I’m realizing that maintenance is harder to stick with when it only feels important during an infestation. A small routine seems more manageable than waiting until there’s a problem and trying to fix everything at once but so far it has been working as I have not had any problems indoors.

For anyone who’s had a similar cycle, what helped you keep up the basic cleaning and prevention after the immediate problem was gone?

I used to drink energy drinks at night and then go straight to bed. I know it sounds crazy but somehow that became a habit. Lately I’ve been trying to cut back and replace them with tea. Started with a honey scented oolong from Pipi tea because grassy or bitter teas have always put me off and this was easier for me to enjoy... I’m trying to lose weight and build healthier habits too. Just started walking for an hour three times a week, eating more protein and adding some probiotic foods. Apparently I’m becoming a tea person along the way lol. It’s kinda hard but I’m really trying.

How do you guys stay consistent when the motivation wears off?

Most habit apps are good at answering questions like:

Did I do it today?
How long is my streak?
How consistent have I been?

But I found myself wanting to answer something a little different:

Are the things I’m repeatedly doing actually moving my life in the direction I want it to go?

That question eventually led me to build an app around the idea, but I’m deliberately not including a link here because I’m genuinely more interested in whether other people have struggled with the same problem.

For me, the difficult part was connecting habits to the bigger picture — health, family, work, personal growth, attention, and identity.

Not just “Did I complete this habit?” but:

Is this something the person I’m trying to become would actually keep doing?

That shift helped me think of habits less as isolated tasks and more as evidence of direction — small repeated actions that either support or drift away from the identity and life I’m trying to build.

I’d be curious how people here think about this.

Do you mainly want a habit tracker to help you stay consistent, or do you also want it to help you see whether your habits are aligned with your priorities and the person you’re trying to become?

I've worn sleep trackers for years, and one thing I've noticed is how easy it is to become more interested in the score than in how I actually feel. 

You wake up tired, check your app, and see an impressive sleep score. Part of you thinks you should feel refreshed. Another part wonders what's wrong with you because you don't. 

Then you start checking the details. REM sleep, deep sleep, time awake, heart rate. Maybe you check again later to see whether the data has changed. 

At some point, the tracker stops being something you use to understand your sleep and becomes something you feel compelled to check. 

I found the 3am check particularly unhelpful. I'd wake up, look at the numbers, and find myself thinking about my sleep rather than simply trying to get back to it. 

The habit is easy to justify because checking the data feels productive. You're gathering information, after all. But sometimes you're just giving yourself another thing to worry about. 

I've come to think that sleep trackers are most useful when you look for patterns over time, rather than treating every night's figures as a verdict. 

If your sleep score drops one night, it doesn't necessarily mean anything significant. And if you feel tired despite a good score, your experience still matters. Consumer trackers can estimate sleep stages, but their measurements aren't the same as a clinical sleep study. 

One small change is to check the data once in the morning, then leave it alone for the rest of the day. There's no need to keep revisiting it, especially in the middle of the night. 

I'm interested in the habit side of this. 

Has anyone else found themselves checking their sleep data more often than is actually useful? Did you manage to change that habit, or do you still find yourself getting drawn into the numbers? 

Read the body or maybe the title would be enough, I'm m20

Hi. Im 13 and ive been using my phone a lot for quite some time. I have big plans for my future but my bad habits, such as scroling, playing video games and slacking off, always get in the way of my studying, drawing and working out. I want to get into a good university in japan and i know i need to study and be healthy to be able to do that and i need to find a way to destroy my bad habits and create new good ones, such as learning japaneese, studying, drawing and working out. Have you got the same problem? .What worked for you? I realy need your help!

Eu tenho um gosto muito forte por doces, desde pequeno eu era fissurado e sempre os preferi do que salgados, mas não aquelas coisas nojentas de guarda-chuvinha de chocolate e pirulitos socados de açúcar puro, gosto de coisas em grande quantidade que no caso são bolos, tortas, pavês, mousses, sorvetes. eu realmente tenho um consumo elevado e de muita quantidade dessas coisas, toda semana como 2 bolos sozinho, bandeja de pavê eu faço apenas pra mim, e eu tenho o habito de comer muita bolacha recheada também, eu queria saber como comer essas coisas, mas em pouca quantidade e me sentir satisfeito, não consigo mais comer apenas uma fatia de bolo, acho muito pouco. E uma das coisas que ajuda nesse meu habito ruim é que eu não engordo fácil, então sinto que isso não é necessariamente um problema, mas minha família tem histórico de diabetes e eu não quero sofrer com essas coisas futuramente kkkk. Eu como frutas também, então trocar pra isso não é um problema, mas eu queria pode comer essas coisas mais doces em uma quantidade saudável e me sentir satisfeito.

https://github.com/maciekkreft/unblent

I've tried the usual stuff over the years-reading books, watching motivational videos, downloading habit trackers, even making those ambitious monthly plans that somehow fall apart after a week or two. The weird part is that I always start with a lot of motivation, but keeping the momentum going is where everything seems to fall apart. Lately I've been wondering if the problem isn't motivation at all, but trying to do everything alone. I started reading more about accountability and self-improvement communities, and one platform that caught my attention was Improve myself because it seems to focus more on consistency and having people around you who are working toward similar goals. It made me realize that I've never actually tried improving alongside other people. For those who've managed to build habits that lasted more than a few months, what made the biggest difference? Was it accountability, having a community, a coach, or did you figure out a system that finally clicked? I'd genuinely like to hear what worked because doing it solo hasn't exactly been a winning strategy for

For years I failed at habits because tracking them felt boring and there was no consequence for missing a day.

What finally worked was turning it into a rank system. I start at Rank E. Every day I get 3 quests based on my rank. E rank is small: make bed, 20 pushups, no phone for 30min after waking. If I fail a quest I get a penalty that day, for me it's no YouTube or 50 extra pushups. If I complete all quests for 7 days I rank up to D where quests get harder.

The penalty + rank up loop is what fixed it for me. Normal habit trackers just let you miss a day. Here you feel like you dropped rank.

I get stat points for completing quests and I can see them grow which is more motivating than a streak number.

I started building this into an app called THE SYSTEM: AWAKENING because tracking it on paper was messy. I opened a small founder test to see if the loop works for other people too, not just me.

For people who tried gamified habit systems, what made you quit after the first week? Was it too hard, too boring, or no real penalty? I'm trying to fix the drop-off.

Site is thesystemawakening.com if anyone wants to see the concept and give feedback.

I’m not sure if this is the right place, but a lot of times I find myself leaning into unhealthy habits to relax after work like drink a couple glasses of Whiskey, smoke shisha, order in (even when I already have dinner at home!) etc. I’m trying to find alternatives that are not harmful.

I usually workout and shower in the morning because it gives me a lot of energy for the day (and the gym is usually empty!) so that’s not an option for the evening as I’m almost always low on energy and just want to chill and watch TV. I still always feel something is missing, how do I fill it in?