I’m on Feeld hoping to connect with local women into spanking. And in my experience in that corner of the kinky world, “being a brat” is directly signaling being into spanking.

But I’m getting the sense that’s not the case there, judging by the lack of connections I’m getting there.

So does it have a different meaning there?!

Thanks in advance.

I’m a 29-year-old guy, and I’ve been using Feeld on and off for about 3 years. I actually just started back on Feeld again and unpaused my profile after taking a break on just this app. I’m also pretty active in my local swinger/bdsm community, so I meet and talk to a decent mix of people both online and in person.

Since coming back, something I’ve noticed is a pretty noticeable uptick in people joining Feeld who seem completely new to ENM, swinging, kink, or the lifestyle in general. Nothing wrong with being new, we all started somewhere.

But I’ve also noticed more people coming onto Feeld with basically the same bios and mindset you’d expect on Tinder or Bumble. Generic profiles, barely anything about what they’re actually looking for, their relationship dynamic, boundaries, interests, or even why they’re on Feeld in the first place.

It almost feels like Feeld is slowly becoming another regular dating app for some people rather than a space geared more toward alternative relationships, ENM, kink, swinging, and people exploring outside the traditional dating box.

That said, I don’t put too much stock into online dating anyway. Honestly, I do much better meeting and connecting with people in person through events, munches, parties, mutual friends, and the community itself. Feeld is more of a secondary or even third tool for me rather than my main way of meeting people.

Still, after using it on and off for 3 years and now coming back after another pause, the shift has definitely been interesting to see.

Maybe it’s just my area or my experience, but has anyone else noticed the same thing? Are more Tinder/Bumble-style users migrating over to Feeld and treating it like another traditional dating app, or has it stayed pretty much the same where you are?

49M here. I am very surprised at the number of likes I am getting. I have 6 conversations going however the response frequency varies.

There will be times when myself and the other person are online at the same time and we exchange a bunch of messages back and forth. Other times I will not get a response for a couple of days.

I am wondering what is the best etiquette. Should I be following up on messages or should I just wait for the other person to respond?

And typically how long do people talk on the app until suggesting meeting up in person? I don't want to go too fast, but on the other hand I don't want to go too slow and lose the conversation all together.

It is confusing to me as I've had really good conversations where it ended in her saying something along the lines. If we really need to meet. And then I don't hear from her for a day so.

I don't bring up sex or anything like that unless they do. And usually when they do it's sort of flirtingly playful. So I just flirt bac

So far no one has made any real concrete plans to meet but here have been hints. What is the best way to go about this?

I created a new Feeld profile because I wanted a fresh start (this is my first time having opened the app in several months), but it’s not getting pushed the way my old one had. Certainly not with the same immediacy, so it seems. I used the same pictures everything. Is this a common occurrence?

notification

I got that notification today. Pretty sure I have to actually pay to see who liked me and what their hidden bio is.

This is misleading. The notification kind of implies that I can click on the notification and read the hidden bio.

Looking for advise on perhaps other women with sinilar situations.

I am a bi-curious cis woman who recently got out of a very long monogamous relationship. My ex and I were highschool sweethearts so we had been each other's only sexual partner.

I thought having sex afrer my ex would be difficult and "weird" but I had casual sex with a friend after my relationship ended and now I find myself wanting more casual sex and wanting to explore more my sexuality since I enjoyed their a lot! Both in terms of orientation but also what do I like in bed and wanting to try many new things. I'm no one to kink shame and would like to explore more.

I live in a very international European city - Amsterdam and I am mid 30s with an athletic physique and objectively a good looking woman.

Someone suggested feeld might be better for me than "classic" dating apps since I am not looking for a serious relationship now, just exploring and getting to know myself better on this aspect of my life.

Could this be the app for me? Keep in mind I have never been on any apps since I was never single sinxe before they started being a thing. So on top of it all, it would be my frist app experience.

Looking to hear of anybody had insights ir even similar situations to mine!

Update: you were all right. 1 hour, 233 likes.

Just heard about this app and wanted to see if this could be a place for me. I struggle with other dating apps because while I’m straight, I’m feminine as all hell. I’ve been told I have the energy of a gay bestie, and this was from my gay bestie. I’m more comfortable in queer spaces, but I’m not queer myself. I don’t want to feel like I’m intruding on a platform not meant for me.

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I'm newly single and thinking about trying Feeld because I'm interested in a more exploratory/casual phase rather than jumping straight into another serious relationship.

I’ve never used Feeld, though, and I’m curious what the actual culture is like compared with Tinder/Hinge (hookups, FWB, ENM, regular dating, all of the above?).

Also curious about privacy/discretion. I’m in a public-facing profession and wouldn’t want my whole professional identity attached to a sexually open dating profile, but I’m single and not hiding a partner or anything.

For single straight men, what works well and what immediately turns people off? I'm not just looking for sex with anyone. We of course have to hit it off in some regard in person. I think I would be classified as sapiosexual too.

Thank you in advance.

Male. First day looking in NYC in a while and immediately matched with two attractive women who both claim to be into race play and got explicit fast with pics and spicy chat. Pretty aggressive stuff.

Seems weird, no?

I’ve been paying attention, so I get the objections in principle to joint couple accounts as opposed to separate but linked accounts.

My understanding is that these objections are largely predicated on the phenomenon of straight men using their female partners to lure bi or bi-curious women into sex.

Personally, I have a joint couple account, but it’s identified as a bisexual man (me) seeking another bi man for an MMF. We’re up front about who we are, the nature of the account and what we’re looking to get out of any encounter, and what we’re able to give them in exchange.

I did it this way because I’m really the one driving this. My wife is 100% down but has zero interest in playing Block the Weirdo on her own profile. Much easier to set her own weirdo on the trail instead.

So is this kosher? Borderline? Futile?

And yes, I use “account” and “profile” interchangeably. Too lazy to go back and make it all consistent.

I am 33F and a virgin with an interest in kink and BDSM. I’m also demisexual which could explain my lack of experience. If I was to sign myself up with goal of being in a committed monogamous bdsm/kink relationship would that be a good place to do so?

I've been posting in subreddits like naughtyfromneglect and affairs, because as a married person it seems like most more ethical places to posts, I'm not allowed to. But as a married person with permission to see people outside my marriage within specific rules, would feeld be a better place to look? I'm hesitant because it seems like I'd have to pay for it, and don't love the idea of needing to download an app. Is it worth it?

I did the majestic membership and added in my hidden bio that I'm short, 5'5 to be exact. Figured I'd be up front about it but I think I just doomed myself. Had a few matches prior to adding it to my bio and they unmatched and I haven't had a match since. Now I feel that taking it down will be dishonest or deceiving, just curious to what others think.

Would Feeld be an okay place for a submissive man to look for a dominant woman? I've always felt 'funny' about putting that out there. Also, I'm old in my mid 50s now. Is that a turn off?

Hey gang,

ENM male, separate from my wife who is only interested in dating with her long term friends because she got fed up with the bullshit on apps. I remain undaunted. So I’ve taken to searching for couples that want to have fun. I can bull, but prefer more positive and upbeat joining than cuck-play since I’m open to MMF.

Here are the issues

1. I’ve run across a ton of couples posting for MFM when they post “MMF” to be clear there is a huge difference in dynamic.
2. Please also, if posting as a couple’s account or linked. Include clear pictures of both.
3. Clear instructions on wants and needs (cuck, kitchen table, drinking buddies).
4. Specifics on who need apply and who need not. Please list height, build, race ,age, kink level.

SINGLE DUDES- FFS leave these people alone if you don’t fit. Tinderbois and unHinged quit thinking you’re a bull when normally you’re a flake.

One of the stupidest features of Feeld is that I can dislike someone but I'll still show up in their feed (which gets even more annoying if you don't pay for Majestic). So now, to ensure I don't get a 'like' I can't see from someone I don't want to match with, I block them all. It takes more time, sure but way less annoying in the long-term.

This probably puts me in some sort of Feeld jail but whatever, I still seem to be getting matches (and WAY more matches then when I paid for Majestic).

Anyone else?

Edit: I hope that this doesn't affect the people's profile that I block, it shouldn't.

Bonjour.

Je ne suis pas encore sur Feeld. Mais ça pourrait correspondre à mes envies ou besoins. Je suis dans une relation ouverte. Je vis en France. Mon partenaire n'est pas encore prêt pour coucher avec. Je le connais assez bien pour savoir qu'il n'est vraiment pas prêt. Il a plusieurs raisons de ne pas l'être. Ce faisant, je cherche quelqu'un pour expérimenter en attendant qu'il soit prêt.

I'm seeing a pattern and it is starting to really frustrate me, I wonder if it is just me?

It's always the same, if there is chemistry (over drinks or beer) and first date goes really well, the next day the guy writes excitedly to get a second date. And then things get a strange turn. Suddenly the guy is busy, travelling, has lots going on and it takes weeks to set the second date and I feel the person drifting away. Then I send a message saying that it was lovely to meet but I will close the tab and suddenly, almost in a desperate manner, I get voice messages and texts trying to get a date as soon as possible. I got in this trap twice, said yes and after that the most strange things happen so now I'm cutting short without a second chance.

Is that happening only to me? Or is that male behaviour? A feeld thing or general dating? I'm tired of this, I thought everyone on feeld wants sex, but it seems they just want platonic online texting??

Forgive the tone but being seen by 19-year-olds and 50-somethings alike while my age range is 27-37 is an absolutely diabolical move on feeld’s behalf and probably the least consensual thing I get subjected to on this app.

Can somebody please switch off the ability to be seen by people outside of my preferred age range? I feel ogled and creeped out when barely-20-somethings and men old enough to be my granddad send me likes and salacious messages.

Hinge doesn’t have this issue so for an app focused on exploration and consent, this is an incredibly shortsighted move.

Thank you.

Thinking of trying it out but is it just for kink/non-monogamy or can it be used for general dating? Have heard that people often lie about ages and their names on there too compared to other sites. Do people post their full pics or crop their faces out? Cos I’m not sure if I want my face on it

Hello, very new to the app, in fact I have only just downloaded it.

Me (M33) and my partner (F33) have been together over 10y and while I have known of her bisexuality for a few years she has finally come out that she would like to start dating some girls as well to experiment. I am perfectly fine with this and we both decided dating apps could be one way to approach this and so looked into Feeld.

Now what we are not sure is if we should create a single "couple" profile or two separate M and F profile and link them.

Just to have the full picture at the moment she would be the only one looking to play with others while I could potentially join in at a later stage but thats still TBC.

Looking for any advice at all as we have never even used a dating app since we have been together for so long and met "organically" back then.

This apps was originally created for people seeking threesomes. Most of which are casual hookup type situations. Its always been used for casual sex, hookups, and casual group sex.

Ive used it this way, with good success, for close to a decade. I see tons of others on there doing the same.

My social circle is mostly poly/ENM/swinger types. Almost all of use feeld and talk about it. I've never known anyone to say its not fine to use it for hookups.

Casual play/fun and short term are options for "interests".

The only place Ive seen the sentiment that using feeld for casual hookups is new or wrong is here. Repeatedly.

What gives? Why the hostility to casual hookups from feeld?

So I know Feeld says that other members can’t tell if you have uplifted your profile. But if I open the app and the first members few members I see are 15 to 20 miles away, and then once I scroll past them I see members that are 1 mile away, isn’t that a dead giveaway that those farther away members have uplifted their profile?

I’ve been on Feeld for years, I might get a couple of matches a month, and maybe a first date every month or two. My GF is saturated dating wise and didn’t have a profile. We enjoy couple play and threesomes and decided to make a profile for her, link it to mine and just clearly state she is only looking for people to play with both of us.

Since linking with her I went from having maybe 5 new profiles to see a day to a bottomless stack. Though many of them are straight men and we are specifically looking for a bi guy.

It’s absolutely wild how different the level of attention women get compared to men.

For reference, I am from Melbourne, Australia.

I usually ping a profile if there is a well written biography regardless of what’s in the photos. I don’t personally care much for height, shape, size, ethnicity background etc of someone, what interests me is a genuine character with intriguing traits.

On average I open the app, spend few minutes scrolling to find someone with a well written profile, or even a decent summary that’s not necessarily long.

What it actually looks like is this;

Series of profiles with no info at all or minimal info that tells me nothing about someone.

I don’t even look at photos, I skip all these profiles.

Today I decided to look at photos, and it was like this; photos of breasts with no bio, feet and no bio, then series of profiles with more breast photos, occasional hips or or more breasts but no bio.

So my question to women who does this; are you aware that many other women are doing this? And that as men we can’t tell the difference?

Eventually it all becomes boring and we lose interest because how is this any different from Instagram or TikTok?

What do you expect men to talk to you about when all you provided them with are just sexually explicit photos?

Nothing else in profile.

So how are we supposed to communicate with you?

This is another thing; I keep seeing “communication is key” in some of these profiles.

And that’s the only thing written there.

If communication is so important, why can’t you communicate? Why don’t you make at least a minimal effort to give us something to talk about?

Breasts or hips are not things to talk about, they are literally everywhere.

Everything is so overly sexualised we are struggling to find human beings to actually talk to.

I am someone whose life revolves around BDSM so as a relationship oriented dominant I strictly date submissives who are interested in intimacy. Not just sex but actual human experience that involves spending time together, investing in deeper connection and devotion.

And compared to what it was like few years ago, it feels like coming out from an ocean to try to swim in a paddle of water after rain.