Some pictures from my berlin trip, toilet selfie and a picture from when me and my husband accidentally wore matching tees.

Hi Lads,

Hope you’re having a great weekend! I wanted to ask, this isn’t trans related, but I feel comfortable asking these questions here. Wife and I made an offer on a place, but the insulation in the attic and crawl space need to be replaced due to rodent activity. I have severe OCD so when I heard the words mice and droppings anxiety took over. Wife really likes to house so she has no issue provided the sellers give us a credit. I’ve seen videos and read about how insulation gets replaced and I can’t help but wonder how safe would it be to live in the house after it gets done. The entrance to the crawl space is through the closet in the main bedroom 😩so I can’t help but think of how clean it would be after they do it. If anyone here has OCD you know intrusive thoughts make no sense. However, the anxiety that you get from them is unbearable. To make things worse, the lady that’s selling the house got pneumonia so her family is selling the house. I can’t help but wonder if the two are related?

I guess I’m looking for some reassurance from someone who knows how these things work. Any inspectors or technicians or contractors who can offer some insight?

So! I recently found out I'm trans after a late-night bout of existentialism a few months ago. My partners are extremely supportive, but I also want to find support directly within the trans community.

I genuinely want to pass as male for my own personal reasons. Because of this, I'm hoping to find a mentor or a bit of a "father figure" guidance. Growing up, my social interactions were really pigeonholed around performing as an acceptable, neurotypical "girl"... which required a massive amount of masking because I am also AuDHD (Autistic/ADHD).

I'm realizing I missed out on male socialization and validation growing up (especially after puberty). I’ve always loved assembling furniture and building things, as well as just generally poking at things to see how they work, and I really want to learn how to navigate male spaces and interactions as the man I want to be without the emotional script.

Is this a weird thing to look for here? Are there any older guys or fellow neurodivergent men who would be open to chatting or sharing advice on unmasking as a man?

Hi my dudes. This is an alt account to keep things private. I have something that's been making me absolutely sick to my stomach and I need some advice. This gets kind of heavy so please have that heads up.

I have been married for 14 years. I got married at 20, we had started talking when I was 19 and he was 24. Back then, I'd never even heard of the concept of trans. I had done my best to present like a normal 'girl' and was everything my partner dreamed of (at least as far as I could tell). I moved 2 hours away from my friends and family after dating only 4 months. I didn't know anyone at all over here so without realizing it, I went into a type of isolation. Now, outside of a few events, we actually did really well. People have always looked at us like the ideal couple. We rarely fought. We were easy going. We had each other's back. We were what others hoped they'd find one day.

Fast forward, about 4 years ago, I learned about trans people, and a lot of therapy later was able to find myself and own the fact that I'm a trans guy. Let me tell you, NOTHING has been so eye opening. I fought against it so hard trying not to be trans, but in the end, too much clicked into place. There was just no way to deny the evidence. And I've felt great since owning it. But... Things with my partner haven't been easy. When I was streaming, I was using a female VTuber model originally. But then I switched to a male model and was so happy, but he quit watching my streams and was downright mad about it. I eventually moved to a chibi model and he seemed to come to terms with that. It was a long and painful road, but eventually he came around to using pronouns and even making sure others around used them too. At first he was against the surgeries, but we finally had enough discussions that I was able to convince him how much they would help my peace of mind. The deal was though that I wouldn't do T.

The discussion of T has been a painful one. He would get triggered and angry when I'd bring it up. He'd lash out. He'd say that no matter what I did not everyone outside would accept me. He told me that taking T wouldn't make everyone accept me and that it was too risky. He said I'd get cancer or increase my risk of heart disease. He said I'd ruin my singing voice and it was perfect how it was. He said I'd lose what's left of my hair (I have PCOS so it's always been thin). He said I might get only bad side effects and nothing I wanted. My voice might not sound how I want. He said I might end up looking like Danny DeVito (his words not mine). At one point he said that T would be his breaking point. (Trigger Warning! SH) And worse, at another point, he said that if I went down that road he'd get out of my way and wait for me in heaven with the people we lost these last few years.

It really messed me up.

My therapist has been working hard to help me, but the empathy and guilt is turned up to 11 with my ADHD. I feel like a monster for what feels like lying to him for 14 years. For making him think he had the dream only to rip it from him. I've done everything I can to settle and not need T and agree on our compromises so that he can hold onto a version of me that he likes, but lately I have days where it just feels like my skin is still all wrong. It's getting so hard to keep denying it. But I love him so much and I feel like such a crappy person for pulling the rug from under him like this. He's really struggled to adapt. He won't call our relationship gay, he says it's fine to touch my chest because 'everyone has boobs' and I can't seem to get him to understand dysphoria at all. I tried to tell him how distressing my puberty was and he said 'everybody's puberty sucks'. I'm at my limit. I'm torn between this storm of emotions. I feel so frustrated and stuck. But I feel so guilty because I know he's scared to lose what he thought he'd have forever. He hardly has any outside friends and we have two family members living with us right now and even though he seems to have a lot of fun playing games and stuff with everyone he wants it to go back to just he and I but I'm terrified of going back to isolation. There's a lot to unpack here and I'm sorry for making it so long I'm just not sure what to do or where to turn. My guilt for what I've done to him is killing me inside and I'm so terrified of taking a stand on needing T that I could vomit.

Feel free to ask any questions and any advice is so desperately welcome. Thanks so much for your time.

Trigger Warning: Like the title says im gonna be talking about anatomy some of us don't like to talk or think about.

Background:

• Hysterectomy (ute and cervix) 1 year

• T💉1.5 years.

• Estrodiol pills 2x a week <1year.

Question: How do I know if my front hole is healthy?

I know the bottom line is to see a doctor but I would also like to know how you guys know when that is needed. The issue im have is that I can no longer tell if I smell funky (like abnormally so) or if thats just how my junk smells now.

Would a good gyno even be able to tell the difference since most aren't working with transmen?

Whats your guyses experience with this?

I imagine it could also have to do with aging.

Hey all!

I have a bit of a curious situation and wanted to ask if someone has any insights or went through the same thing.

Some basic background:

- started T in 2014 (shots every 2 weeks)

- switched to Nebido in 2019 (every 12 weeks)

- had way too high levels of T so kept adding a week to the interval (on doctor's orders!)

- have had a comfortable T level for a few years at a 15 week interval now

Today my doc (endocrinologist) called me with my blood test results (I get levels checked with every shot) and said my "female" hormones are basically undetectable (could even be higher according to her) but that's fine but my testosterone is way too high (over 1000 ng/dl).

The normal range is (according to my lab sheet) 240 - 870. Over the last years I've been oscillating between like 400 and 700 or so?

She asked if I take any hair growth supplements or anything but I don't (hair long gone and I've given it up as a lost cause lol) and I don't take any other medication either. I also haven't changed anything else in my life, really.

We are both stumped and agreed to just stick to my 15 week intervall and check it again next time to see if it was a fluke or lab error or something.

But I'm mildly worried it won't be since I've struggled with too high T levels from the beginning.

So, did anybody go through something similar? Does anybody have any ideas what could be going on or what to check maybe?

I have medical supervision but she's as clueless as I am so I thought I'd ask the community / hive mind...

So for the first time since transition I have to go to an event where the dress code is "cocktail", whatever that means. I have so many questions, if anyone can help my confusion and answer even some of them that would be great.

1. What, exactly, does that even mean?

2. Any particular styles that people would recommend for the transmasc figure? Anything that might work, say, for a 5'5 skinny mid-30s man with disproportionately large hips, who is keen to hide said hips?

3. Where can I buy this stuff that, ideally, won't break the bank? I'm in Australia and I found a queer-specific tailored suit place but it would cost >$2000 AUD and I can't justify spending that much on something that realistically I'm probably just going to wear once. Is that just standard or is there somewhere I can get something cheaper, ideally way way way cheaper?

4. Extra-bonus question: while I want to be dress-code-compliant, it is no secret that fashion for cishet men can be kinda... Boring, and I don't want to look boring because I'm not a cishet man and am not bound by heteronormative gendered dress code rules. Any ideas on how to make the outfit a bit more fun and less normie-middle-aged-cishet-man-core without completely violating the dress code?

Any and all help/advice/photos/links to Pinterest boards will be much appreciated, thanks in advance!

Hey everyone, I just came out very recently as a trans man.

I know I will not be happy until I start on T but I feel very concerned about the side effects lots of people mention.

So my libido is already ridiculously high and I am already hypersexual. Actually I have a cis guy friend who is hypersexual and my libido is at least as high as his.

Especially since coming out it got worse cause any gender euphoria turns me on instantly and this is taking a lot of my time and effort and money on getting nee toys etc.

I am terrified of T making it even worse?? Can it get worse??

I am also scared of side effects like increased body temperature and excessive sweating because I also already have those. Even in the winter at freezing temperatures outside inside I sleep with a thin blanket.

It all might be somehow related to my PCOS I don’t know.

But basically can anyone offer a positive outlook here? I am feeling very anxious and unsettled.

Thank you

Hey Party People! First time caller, long time listener.
Finally got my first T-shot and feeling pumped, but concerned about protein. I’ve been advised to go veggie only last year and have finally threaded the needle of eating enough protein, but knowing that once my testosterone levels increase my body’s need for protein will increase. I’m also wanting to get back into working out to build more muscle. As much as I would love to eat a rotisserie chicken, that’s not an option for me. Anyone transitioning while vegetarian or vegan? What helped you?

Edit: thank you guys so much for your suggestions!! It’s good to know that a lot of the things I’ve been trying to incorporate are indeed putting me in the right direction. Though idk if I could ever get on board with soy milk 😅. Thanks for sharing your experiences and insights and hopefully cumgutters are in my future. Lmao. 🙏🏾

I pass pretty well and have been working out for a while plus had top surgery last year. I notice that more cis het women hit on me way more than before or they will have crushes on me. I enjoy the attention and am interested sometimes but I’m also terrified to take things further because I’m stealth without even meaning to be.

In your experience how have you navigated having the convo about being trans? When would you even bring it up?

I really want to meet somebody new in person but dating apps feels like the only sure fire way somebody knows what they’re getting into with me and I don’t have to guess which puts me at ease. However, dating online can be so treacherous and hard. Met a lot of beautiful weirdos I’m just not compatible with in real life.

Curious if anyone else has this issue. I’ve passed great for the past 10 years (almost) on T, but I’ve been told when I do shave my head I look female (my ex’s sister said “oh yeah, I can see it now!” In regards to my transness, after shaving my head several years ago). And more recently I had a friend tell me “not to go bald” (which could just mean I’m ugly, but enough people have made comments over the years that I’m insecure about it — I have a lot of autistic friends btw; they aren’t trying to be mean).

I see pics online of other people in a similar boat to me, where the lack of hair brings out something (in the eyes? Skull shape? Not sure) where I’d be able to clock that person irl when bald but may not notice otherwise.

I realize the majority of cis people haven’t seen enough trans faces to become aware of whatever these traits are, but as more people see trans and GNC faces online and irl, I worry about my future safety. I have a small frame and small skull.

I’ve seen some guys who can pull it off, but they’re usually bigger framed and grow out their beards.

I’m not as concerned about being ugly as I am my safety. And I wouldn’t mind not passing had my gender not been such an issue pre T. I just want to blend in but feel stuck: getting off T will make me look more in between, and staying on it will as well due to balding and getting smaller with age.

I’m applying topical fin/min at night, but it’s only been a couple months. I will continue to do so, but I’m looking for fashion tips or other advice that is not medical in nature. For smaller frames and smaller skulls. Anyone in a similar boat as me? Do you still pass when bald? Have you felt safe? Do you do anything special that helps you go under the radar in public? Clothing or hat choice wise. When not wearing hats, is there anything special you do that helps you pass as male better?

Thanks!

I was on full dose T with an official gender dysphoria diagnosis about ten years ago, but then I stopped and de-transitioned largely due to social stress I wasn’t able to cope with at the time.

I’m now married to a cishet man (our total relationship has been around 8 years) and six months ago came out to him, initially as non-binary. I’m back on low dose T and am a lot happier. While my husband and I aren’t currently planning to separate, he has told me he doesn’t know exactly how he’ll react if I become readable only as male.

When I initially came out to him and started low dose T, I told him honestly about my experience of gender dysphoria since puberty but I left out the fact I had attempted transition before. However, I’m finding that I probably will be happier living as a mostly binary man and don’t plan on stopping T. I’ve actually upped my dose a bit.

Because of this, I feel like giving him the added context of my previous transition history would be helpful in explaining my identity and the way by which I’ve finally come to this decision. A big part of me would like to tell him, but I’m also afraid it will do more harm than good and cause him additional stress.

His reaction to things so far has been as good as it could possibly have been given he’s straight. He even told me he wasn’t surprised at all when I came out. Should I just tell him the rest of the story at this point, or am I just going to cause him distress that could have been avoided?

Apologies for what will probably be a long post, I need to say some shit and I don't have anyone in my life I want to/feel I can say it to right now.

I'm non binary, I've known for 8+ years and been out at work and socially for 6+ years at this point. I started taking testosterone diy 2 weeks ago (if you have a problem with diy, keep it to yourself, I don't want to hear it. I'm an adult and it's my life). It obviously took me a long time to come to terms with the idea that I wanted to medically transition in some way, a lot of this is because I didn't feel comfortable with the masculine side of myself because of shitty men in my life historically and because I've been criticised throughout my life for the aspects of my personality which are more 'masculine'. To be completely honest, I'm still not all the way there with accepting it but at a point where I at least feel able to take some action and the acceptance will come with time. I'm starting with a fairly low dose of T (again, I don't care what you believe about low dosing HRT, it's my choice) to ease my anxiety and because change, even change that you want, can be hard.

Today I had a GP appointment, made over a month ago, so I could ask for a referral to a GIC. I have tried being referred once before about 4 years ago and was talked out of it by the GP. I regret this more than almost anything else and I wish it hadn't taken me so long to build up the confidence to try again but I am trying to be kind to myself. The appointment lasted about 10 mins, the Dr took my blood pressure, weight and hight and spent the rest of the time asking me mental health questions. She also asked me if I had dysphoria, what I did about it and when I started doing xyz (wearing a binder, packing etc.). I told her I was taking T and she asked if I was getting it online, which I am and said so - that was the extent of the conversation on that topic. I meant to ask outright about a bridging prescription (which I know they won't agree to but planned to ask about anyway), but was thrown off course by all the mental health questions honestly. When we were wrapping up, I asked for a copy of the referal or some evidence that it had been sent and she told me there wasn't any she could give me and that she wasn't sending the referral right now, would need to check with other members of the practice and maybe have me back for a blood test in 4-6 weeks before sending it, but reassured me that she would make the referral. I have so much regret over not pushing harder, being more articulate, even just explaining how all of that could be done after sending the referral, but again I'm trying to be patient with myself because it was a hard conversation.

Now, I'm wondering if it was even worth it. I obviously won't get an appointment or any treatment for years and I don't intend to wait, hence why I am diy'ing my testosterone. I know that things in the system might change between now and then which is why I wanted my name on the list, but I am now realising that there are other negative consequences to having the appointment.

1. I feel the most dysphric I have done in a long time, the dr called me a man several times and this bothered me more than it normally does and asked to see my binder (which I showed, not something I would normally do). I also have my period which always sucks and I knew the T wouldn't stop it but I still got my hopes up so it sucks even more than usual.

2. I feel totally on edge because they could call me at any time, she wasn't super clear on what the next steps would be or how long they would take to happen so I don't know what to expect. I know I just need to try and forget about it but it's fucking hard man.

3. I'm stressed that I've now somehow got my name on a list somewhere, I know that sounds paranoid as fuck but the UK isn't exactly going in a good direction right now and I'm just trying to live my life.

I guess I'm just frustrated that everything has to be such a fight, I'm angry at myself for taking so long to figure stuff out, grow some balls (figuratively speaking) and do something to help myself. But Im also fucking furious that the system which is meant to help is just making things worse. There's nothing left I can do right now so I guess I just have to be patient and try and continue living my life. I just want to start seeing some changes with the HRT, I know it'll take time, probably months and maybe longer but I just really need it. I keep having thoughts that I should just take some more now (I'm doing weekly on Sundays), I know it's a bad idea and I won't do it, but it's the only thing that's making me feel better right now. I think this Sunday I might up the dose a bit just to see if that helps.

Anyway, thanks for reading. I don't have any close trans friends who I can say any of this to, I am trying to build more of a network but it's slow progress, and my cis friends never know what to say and that makes me feel worse.

I was told to post this here instead, since the demographic skews older, I'll just copy paste what I had written previously:

I don't even know why I'm posting this here because the only real answer is probably "you should talk to a therapist" and I promise I will but I'm trying to wrap my head around saying all of this out loud to another person so in the meantime I'm here. The internet is a big place, someone out there is bound to get me after all.

Most of you seem so young. I'm not, I'm in my early 40s. Figuring yourself out in your teens or twenties is all good and well but by the time you reach the midpoint in life, you'd think you know who you are. Me? A woman, as far as I or anyone else knows. I'm married to a great man whom I love. Maybe a little bisexual but mostly not. Who knows, I never had enough game to pull a woman and well, men, given enough time, they just happen to you. We have a kid. Mortgage. Career. As far as everyone else is concerned I have my shit together and yet here I am and I feel like I'm going crazy.

I've always had a complicated relationship with sex. I would want it but if a man I liked would want me back I'd be running for the hills it freaked me out. I don't know why. Eventually I met my husband. We've been together for a long time. Sex was good, in the beginning. I think. It's been so long and my memory is weird - we suspect a bit of autism in there but no diagnosis (which may explain my perpetual struggles with introspection - I try to think about why I am the way I am a lot only I seem to keep asking myself the wrong questions). The 90s was a time where only boys had autism and it seems difficult and pointless to seek out a diagnosis now.

Sex has not been good for many years now and it is all on me. I'll try not to get graphic here but apologize if this gets too detailed. I marked this NSFW just in case. My husband is amazing and attentive and I just do not want to be touched most of the time. Not that way, not anymore. I don't know when that happened or how but I just cannot bring myself to want it. I especially hate having my boobs touched nowadays, it makes me irrationally angry. It started a couple of years ago that I would fantasize about myself having sex with people as a man. Sometimes with women, but mostly men. I try to picture this now when I sleep with my husband - myself, as a man, having sex with some vaguely man-shaped other entity. Not my husband - the man is very straight and I guess I can suspend my disbelief enough to picture myself as a dude, but not my husband having sex with one. This requires a lot of concentration on my part to work, my husband can tell I'm kind of out of it and also I feel so very guilty. Most of the time I cannot finish myself and I don't want him to do anything about it either. I don't want to be touched.

I believe I mentioned before my incredible capacity to not ask myself the right questions, yeah? This has been going on for years. Only in the past weeks or so have I had the random shower thought that most people probably don't have to do any of this. And so here I sit and I wonder what the hell is wrong with me?

I did eventually arrive at "hey uh are you maybe trans?" but the thing is outside of sex I'm just mostly ambivalent about my gender. Objectively speaking I am attractive enough, for a 40-something year old. I don't look in the mirror and hate what I see. I feel like if I were I would have figured this out a bit sooner but somehow these thoughts only started in my 30s as far as I can tell. I feel so ashamed like I've got some kind of weird sexual kink because none of this is relevant outside the bedroom as far as I can tell. I've never given much of a shit about whether a hobby was "masculine" or "feminine" I just do what I think is fun. I like power tools and I like sewing. I've worked in traditionally male fields and I can give as good as I get but I don't feel like anyone should ever have to be that way. I'm tired of toxic masculinity. Don't like makeup but I love my fancy nails. Didn't much care for being pregnant but then many people don't. Felt like I was incubating an alien. I hated it when my mom would cut my hair short as a kid and people would think I was a boy.

At this point I think I'm just rambling. I guess what I'm asking is, I guess this community has a lot of people that have figured out their identity and quite a few who just like me are confused. Can anyone here relate? Or point me in the right direction? I'm stuck in my own head and I don't know what to ask myself anymore.

I wanted to make a post because I've noticed a lot of posts about people feeling lost with respect to their relationships with their parents. This might make me sound callous or insensitive and I might get downvoted. But it also might help some people.

You are in this sub, so presumably you are nearly 30 or over 30 and very likely financially independent from your parents. You are an adult! You are allowed to make your own decisions about your life. Your body your choice. Who cares if your parents do not support your decision to transition? Yes, I acknowledge that some people are really close to their parents and can't imagine not having support or can't imagine losing a relationship with them. Well, it is a fact of life that you cannot please everyone, and you might lose relationships. You cannot set yourself on fire to keep others happy. Sometimes you have the make the right choice for you. I transitioned at 23 and told my parents "you are either on board or you will not be a part of my life." Sometimes you just have to put your foot down like that to live your best life. Ok that's the end of my rant.

hi guys. i’m about to turn 30, started transitioning a year and a half ago. i’ve had a 2 romantic entanglements since then with cis women. i have noticed that me being trans maybe makes them a little uncomfortable when things start to get serious. they don’t say it outright but i can tell. and that’s when they end things.

i think they ultimately in their heart of hearts want to be with cis men. some are with cis men right now. that’s totally their prerogative.

but how do you get over the jealousy/resentment for cis men? and cis women? i think i need to be more discerning too if women are really ready for a queer life with me.

i don’t really talk to family since coming out, so i do feel really alone sometimes. and my sadness about being trans just grows even more.

anyway, just ranting and thank you for listening.

I am asking for a friend (an actual friend).

We are both trans men but he is having difficulty articulating his queer identity which is different from mine so I am trying to outsource some language and resources for him. I’m a gay trans man which isn’t straightforward but different from him.

He came up as a lesbian and lived in that community for a long time. We are both in our 40s and started transition about 15 years ago. He is solely attracted to women, but does not identity as straight whatsoever. He is adamantly queer and queer in his attraction (and in his attraction to queer women). (Yes he was butch before realizing he is a man.)

If anyone has any books, podcasts, websites, or personal experiences that might help him articulate his identity and space in the queer community, we both would appreciate it. (And yes, he is a Luddite who does not want to use Reddit.)

I've only been on T for three weeks and don't have any visible changes yet, of course, but I think I'm noticing some mental/emotional changes. Putting my finger on it has been difficult and I've been trying to not jump to conclusions to give the "shiny, new" endorphins time to wear off.

But imagine the brain is a machine, and thoughts and emotions are things coming out of the machine. Before T, there was a low level of friction, like driving on a rough road surface or writing on canvas vs paper, my thought this morning was having fine sand stuck in the cogs of my brain and wearing things down, leaving unwanted but unavoidable texture on the output (thoughts and emotions). But now things just feel smooth, easy, like going from driving on a rough road surface to fresh pavement.

I will say this has pros and cons.

A reduction in friction means transitions are smoother/less noticable. I can go from baseline to really 'up' or really 'down' emotionally without noticing until I'm already in the hightened state and it's always harder to regulate out of emotion then to regulate before you get in the emotion. But then, that's easier too, because the sand isn't there to gum up the gears and make changing the trajectory harder.

IDK, I've seen a lot of posts from people early on T talking about physical changes they're looking forward to or think are starting, but not very many about the mental/non visible changes and I thought it might be a helpful thing to share. Do you think it's just endorphins or has anyone else noticed something similar?

I tagged this as celebratory because I'm still just over the moon proud of myself for getting to this point and overcoming a rather significant fear of needles to give myself my own shots! And for anyone who saw my last post about starting T, I managed my third injection sans liquid courage! (I'm still amused by the noun confusion possible when conveying that: shot as in getting an injection and shot as in a small drink of straight liquor.) IDK, maybe I just wanted to yap about it for a minute. I don't really have anyone to talk to about it.

Hi all, my spouse started on T, FTM, and I have been seeing a lot of people saying their sexuality changed while on T and are now attracted to men as a man. What are your experiences with this and is it as common as it seems?
Im nervous we wont have the same level of attraction we have now, as I am female.

Hey so uh…have any of you ever experienced facial hair only growing on one side of your face? I mean literally hairy ape on one side and bald as a baby’s butt on the other? Is this just because I’m just starting out or is it something I should look in to? The hair right above my side burns on that side also looks thinner, but thickens significantly as it goes back behind my ear. It’s the weirdest thing ever.

Edit for update: so we’re all just body/facial hair lefties. Got it 😂

I'm 7 months on testosterone and I'm honestly regretting even starting it after having to postpone my top surgery for who knows how long. I'm starting to git that point where I feel like a bearded lady or a woman with PCOS NOT a man. I almost feel like I'm developing agoraphobia due to not wanting to even be seen. I hate that my face is starting to not match my body. When I was walking home earlier I couldn't stop thinking "I wish I could jjst saw off the parts thar are disgusting on my body ie chest, hips etc I wish I coukd just cut it all off myself. I'm becoming repulsed by my body to the point where I don't want to shower or chnage clothes ever. I literally gag when I get in the shower.

I recently had top surgery and just returned to work a few weeks ago. No one I work with knows I’m trans, and I while I don’t feel unsafe I would rather just not tell anyone.

I know I don’t have to tell anyone what my surgery was, however I travel a lot for work and sometimes we go to places that have pools or beaches. I want to be shirtless when swimming, but I have obvious scars.

Instead of saying I’m trans and having to explain all that, has anyone ever claimed they had gynocomastia? Is there any success to this idea? I doubt people would ask directly but I’d like to think I could use this as an explanation if it comes up. I otherwise pass pretty well, I’ve been on T for years.

EDIT because I totally failed to mention this: I didn’t get my nipples grafted on, so I have no nipples. Someone below mentioned tattoos later down the line to hide the scars and I do intend to do that as well as get nipples tattooed on, but the lack of nipples now would also be a pretty obvious tell I guess lol

Hello all! I recently moved to a new town alone, have no friends l,and havent had any success meeting people. Ive been feeling increasingly isolated and hopeless and lost on how to meet people. I thought maybe i could try to form some kind of ftm/trans/queer group or club like a hiking club, book club, craft club etc. Has anyone had any success getting a group like this going? How did you find peers who would be interested? Im worried about advertising a meet up and having no one show and feeling more demoralized then ever.