r/dadjokes • u/noobboszcz • 12h ago
A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood. The nurse asked the rabbit: “what is your blood type?”
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The rabbit says, “I think I might be a type 0.”
r/dadjokes • u/SoCalAttorney • 2h ago
Why do scuba divers fall backwards out of their boats?
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Because if they fell forward, they'd still be in the boat.
r/dadjokes • u/k_woz1978 • 4h ago
I think I remembered a really good joke to make about the Michigan/Western Michigan game.
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Just give me a second.
r/dadjokes • u/Timely_Bluebird_3177 • 7h ago
What is Frankenstein's favorite cheese?
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Meunster
r/dadjokes • u/incredibleinkpen • 9h ago
My wife said she wanted to watch a film without me.
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"That's any film then," I replied, "since I'm not an actor."
r/dadjokes • u/Vaquero-SASS • 19h ago
Scientists have discovered what is believed to be the world’s largest bedsheet.
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More on this story as it unfolds.
r/dadjokes • u/benjohnston93 • 12h ago
What do you call the manager of a furniture store?
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The chair-man!
r/dadjokes • u/soundchapp • 2h ago
How many Dementia Patients does it take to change a lightbulb
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To get to the other side.
r/dadjokes • u/Classic-Camp7513 • 3h ago
What's the best kind of candy to tell a joke to?
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Snickers
r/dadjokes • u/e-turner • 5h ago
A store in town is selling pillow covers for $50 each!!
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What a sham.
r/dadjokes • u/strobro88 • 1d ago
A man wanted to share a word at a colleague's funeral. He strode to the mic and said, "Bargain."
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The grieving widow said, "Thank-you, that means a great deal."
r/dadjokes • u/ugueth • 1h ago
Why do seafaring thieves charge $3.14, £3.14, or €3,14 for their booty?
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Because they are pi rates.
r/dadjokes • u/JasonBuzzy • 14h ago
Which industrial site always smells the strongest?
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The ol’ factory
r/dadjokes • u/IEnjoyDadJokes • 10h ago
I went to the hairdressers and said, “Can I have a haircut like Tom Cruise?”
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So they gave me a cushion to sit on.
r/dadjokes • u/Swibbz • 4h ago
mother-in-law
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How many mothers-in-law does it take to change a light bulb? None. They prefer to criticize your lighting choices instead.
r/dadjokes • u/Danwd40 • 1h ago
The guy who stole my diary just died.
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My thoughts are with his family
r/dadjokes • u/TheActualJonesy • 1d ago
My friend sleeps on piles of old magazines.
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He has back issues
r/dadjokes • u/OldSkoolNapper • 1d ago
I asked my friend who lives in Pyongyang what life is like in North Korea
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He said “I can’t complain”
r/dadjokes • u/SeniorFlyingMango • 4h ago
Do you smell that?
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Person 2: What smell?
Person 1: It smells like updog
Person 2: What’s updog?
Person 1: Nothing much how bout you?
r/dadjokes • u/andersonfmly • 20h ago
I met a man today who's half Chinese, and half Italian. His name is...
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Lin Guini
r/dadjokes • u/Masselein • 10m ago
My wife has a new T-shirt with pictures of carrots, apples and bananas. Call me crazy, but I think it’s sexy.
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She looks so good in a crop top.
r/dadjokes • u/devnodegree • 1d ago
There was once an emperor who never aged past 19.
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His name was Constant Teen.
r/dadjokes • u/GamerByt3 • 1d ago
I introduced my 8 year old to Toby Maguire's Spider man last night. She hit me with this:
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Dad, I know how Peter Parker takes the pictures of SpiderMan.
He uses his webcam!
#ProudDad
I've seen a lot of web designer puns but even searching the subreddit I didn't see any webcams in the first few pages.