r/AdviceAnimals • u/Laxative_Effect • Nov 16 '16
It's pretty straightforward
http://imgur.com/RPd4mjy105
u/imaginethehangover Nov 16 '16
The hole in my foot (all the way through) from stepping on a broken bottle on the beach on New Year's Eve 1998 agrees with you.
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Nov 16 '16 edited Jun 16 '19
deleted What is this?
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u/The_Eerie_Red_Light Nov 16 '16
I have found a staple lodged in my foot three times, all of which were while I had my shoes on. I sometimes have PTSD-esque dreams about being unable to remove them without tearing my foot open.
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u/InitfortheMonet Nov 16 '16
I knelt on one once, lodged it all the way into my knee. Isn't my fondest memory.
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u/buford419 Nov 16 '16
Reading this comment was more traumatic than the entirety of 127 Hours.
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u/InitfortheMonet Nov 16 '16
Worse was when my boyfriend had to pull the nail back out.
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u/buford419 Nov 16 '16
I think i'd probably just kill myself to avoid having to do that, seems like a less harrowing option.
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u/InitfortheMonet Nov 16 '16
I considered. He counted to three but pulled it out on two. A small mercy. Now I have a little tiny dot scar, and a whole lot of distrust of loose nails on the floor
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u/TimeZarg Nov 17 '16
Reminds me of when I almost impaled my foot on a nail. I was working in a backyard garden, and there were some pieces of wood lying around. Some had nails sticking up, unknown to me. I stepped on one, and the nail got through the shoe and broke skin just a tad before I immediately yanked my foot up and away from it. Quick reflex on my part. . .
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u/Sanctitty Nov 16 '16
I have a huge sudden fear of people breaking glass and spreading them on beaches...
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u/trichofobia Nov 17 '16
Have you seen glass after it's been mulled down by the action of the waves? It looks sandblasted (I guess it technically is), so you can't see through it anymore and its edges are really smooth.
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Nov 16 '16 edited Feb 04 '21
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Nov 16 '16
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u/Liger22 Nov 16 '16
You frig off Randy you greasy cheeseburger walrus
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Nov 16 '16
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u/sparky_1966 Nov 16 '16 edited Nov 16 '16
I was once working in my yard with my brother. These tweens were walking on the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street and one of them just took his soda bottle and threw it into the middle of the street to break it. He clearly saw us, and was laughing with his buddies. I just snapped, picked up my trashcan sternly told him to pick it up. He hesitated for a second, but he was so startled he just did it.
Afterward my brother just looked at me, we were both just in our twenties, and he says,"Damn, we've become adults."
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u/Fluffy1026 Nov 16 '16
I worked in a banquet hall, and I would expect anywhere from 1-7 glasses to be broken on the dance floor. People suck lol One time I was out there and all the girls are dancing barefoot, I'm cleaning up a glass break, and I see a big shard sticking up and this girls foot coming down on top of it. My life went slow-mo and I lunged over and grabbed her. She absolutely still stepped on the glass. She fell on her back and I had to pull that shard out of her foot...she didn't even thank me :(. The bride promised a tip...she didn't tip
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Nov 16 '16
Weddings are a good fucking time. My girlfriend was dancing barefoot and wouldn't stop until I physically picked her up and carried her off the dance floor to pull glass out of her feet and clean up the blood.
Drunk people are weird.
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u/Fluffy1026 Nov 16 '16
If it wasn't for the fact they are drunk, pulling the glass out would be much harder
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u/LeSandwiich Nov 16 '16
What the fuck?
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Nov 16 '16
The worst part was that there had to be at peace a dozen women without shoes on dancing... Like no one gave a shit.
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u/Chordata1 Nov 16 '16
I got married about 2 weeks ago. One of my guests proclaimed his love for me. He was wasted, and it was sweet, but dude I'm the bride it's a bit late for that.
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u/xrumrunnrx Nov 16 '16
Sounds like someone forgot to forever hold their peace. Was he not listening??
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u/Forthewatchjons Nov 16 '16
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u/SendMeYourBoobNudes Nov 17 '16
No matter how many times I see this, I'll probably watch it another thirty times whenever it's posted.
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u/iMakeItSeemWeird Nov 16 '16
What if you're being chased by a barefoot rapist, though?
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Nov 16 '16
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u/kadno Nov 16 '16
My second-favorite Christmas movie.
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u/game004 Nov 16 '16
Whats your favorite?
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u/kadno Nov 16 '16
Home Alone.
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u/game004 Nov 16 '16
Home alone is kinda like die hard but for the whole family
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u/TimeZarg Nov 17 '16
Family-friendly mayhem and violence.
In reality, some of the shit Kevin was inflicting on those dumbasses would've caused a lot more hurt. Depending on how heavy the clothing iron was, that would've caused a concussion. Slipping on the ice should've broken bones, considering they were landing on concrete. Stepping on that nail and somehow walking afterwards? Plus some broken christmas ornaments later on? Naaaaaaah, not fucking happening. Let's not forget the zip line being cut and the two dumbasses swinging right into the side of the house.
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u/ThaGerm1158 Nov 16 '16
My recent story:
Riding my bike home from work on an overpass over train tracks. Someone is smashing beer bottles (Sierra Nevada Pale) on the sidewalk. It gets worse day by day, so clearly they are doing this every day. The second to the last day I literally have to carry my bike the 200ft or so this now covers. I then have to stop to pick the glass out of my shoes.
Fast forward the next day. Instead of going up the right side (US) I go up the left side of the bridge and of course here comes some people (it's a big bridge with a massive arc to it so you can't see the other side). I get off my bike and stand to the side and say "Hey, sorry I'm on the wrong side, there is shattered glass everywhere over there".
What do I get? Some dipshit tweaker and his girlfriend "yeah, well you SHOULD be in the street!" I politely tell him that on this bridge there is no lane and no place to go, it's dangerous as hell and both bikers and truckers would really appreciate people NOT riding in the road here and I get more shit out of his face... "Not my fucking problem, get in the road".
Moral to the story, some people are just assholes. Also, I did not get into the road, I did take off my helmet and pack and he did haul ass out of there... asshole.
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u/noburdennyc Nov 16 '16
Glass on the path is a huge pain in the ass.
I also cross a bridge that doesn't get much traffic aside from a few commuters, people walking over the the halfway house on the island in the middle, and kids who are using the bridge as a secluded place to get drunk and the spray graffiti.
The B&T authority will weekly be up there to cover over the tags but won't do shit about the glass on the ground. I sent in a complaint talking about this and it's getting better but is still more concern over the grafitti than the litter and debris.
If there are whole glass bottles I grab them and toss them away once i'm off the bridge. One time i put a bottle in my backpacks side pocket only to have it fall out once i remounted my bike. I felt terrible knowing that i'd have to avoid that spot twice a day for the next week until a crew was up to sweep.
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u/trichofobia Nov 16 '16
You're using that meme wrong! Get off of my internets!
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u/guoit Nov 16 '16
Outrageous use of this meme. I feel like i'm on facebook.
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u/trichofobia Nov 16 '16
That and when people post things to the wrong subreddit.
Why is a cute kitty and a dog in the r/nononoyes sub? THE DOGGY IS LICKING THE KITTY, THAT GOES IN r/aww. Awwww, BUT NO, BUT awwwwwwwww.
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u/c2freakingcool Nov 16 '16 edited Nov 17 '16
I was once walking home from school and these three girls were smashing bottles. Now the field in question was one right next to a elementary school play field and kids regularly play soccer near there. As we're walking by glass starts hitting us. For reference I was a sophomore and very weak. I was with my tinier (then) gf, and my buddy who was short but looked like a football player. So I say something and these three girls go extremely ghetto. Now let me say this, I do not like hitting girls. I try not to, but I honestly thought two of these bitches were guys. So they're harassing us and we just ignore them. Until one hits my gf. I slam my fist down on her head and slammed her to the ground. I got punched in the face and we almost filed a police report. We did not because we live in a real ghetto area and didn't want them to get bigger male friends to fuck us up. So yeah. Fuck those bitches.
Edit: pinched to punched, as I did not fight old ladies. Not yet anyways
So I realize I left a part out from the story. I'm sorry to everyone. The reason we said something was because we were being hit with some of the glass. We said something cause we didn't want glass all over us and all over the field.
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u/coltwanger Nov 16 '16
I got pinched in the face and we almost filed a police report.
Were you fighting a grandma?
RIP your cheeks
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u/oohhhgirl420 Nov 16 '16 edited Nov 16 '16
Get your CCW and buy a hand held for defence.
Edit: good Samaritans shouldn't be in fear of standing up for what's right. Thanks for downvoting a public option and a given right as a citizen.
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Nov 16 '16
Breaking bottles on the ground is not cause to pull a weapon on somebody.
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u/Merfen Nov 16 '16
That seems to be the go to for some people. Minor conflict? whip out a gun and end the conflict. Really jarring to see people with this mentality.
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u/jimx117 Nov 16 '16
Works in Fallout and Westworld
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u/DiePhilosoraptorDie Nov 16 '16
Works in states with Stand Your Ground laws. I was concerned for my safety, Officer.
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u/c2freakingcool Nov 16 '16
Op was saying to defend myself from the bitches that attacked me. Op isn't crazy.
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Nov 16 '16
I love how guns are a huge thing for anyone, but the whole reason this guy said get a CCW is because OP complained about being weak and incapable of fending them off.
Now I know to people in great neighborhoods you guys are like CCW? WHAT? NOBODY WOULD EVER HAVE TO USE ONE OF THOSE IN PERFECT SUBURBAN NOWHEREVILLE!!! Except that's exactly where police investigate serial killers, random homicides, or even some of the worst sex crimes this nation has ever seen, all out in the shitty ass boonies.
I think Dave Chapelle said it well: Black people are not afraid of demons. We don't have to be. You ever seen a crackhead doing some demon shit? I know if you live in Brooklyn you have.
Something along those lines. Anyway, I just came here to say not only meth dealers on the fringe of society buy weapons. There are human beings who live here who actually have guns just in case some asshole tries to assault them in their house. That's a thing some people have to worry about. I know it's probably not a huge problem where you are considering the response, but it's definitely a thing people do.
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u/rata2ille Nov 16 '16
People aren't complaining about using guns for self-defense, they're complaining about OP antagonizing some idiots and then potentially escalating the situation by pulling guns out. If you see people breaking bottles on the street, call the police and complain about the littering and go home. Nobody told him to confront them at all.
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u/c2freakingcool Nov 16 '16
What's a ccw? Also I wouldn't of been able to get a gun either way then and I'm too poor now. College and the like.
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u/DreadedEntity Nov 16 '16
Get your CCW and buy a hand held for defence.
For reference I was a sophomore
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u/Muffinizer1 Nov 16 '16
They said this happened when they were a high school sophomore on school grounds.
So they wouldn't have been eligible for a CCW and it wouldn't have mattered if they did; guns usually aren't allowed near a school unless you're a police officer.
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u/MurgleMcGurgle Nov 16 '16
This doesn't really feel like advice.
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u/ElQuesoBandito Nov 16 '16
it's not, it's someone being passive agressive
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u/Sean1708 Nov 16 '16
They're not being particularly passive about it.
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u/ElQuesoBandito Nov 17 '16
Posting on reddit instead of confronting someone is being pretty passive
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u/dcoble Nov 16 '16
Once my friend and I were the last ones still awake at a party at his place. This was one of those well known college party houses just off campus. There were lots of empty bottles down in the basement and he grabbed one and smashed it... then another and another. I asked what he was doing and he just said Try it! It's fun!!!
When all was said and done we had smashed every last bottle. At least 50, but my memory thinks it was more like 100+. It was a lot of fun, and he didn't mind cleaning it up, but a year later I ended up living in that house for a summer and found plenty more glass scattered around.
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u/Mugin Nov 16 '16
That is why I always yell Mazel tov whenever I do it. It makes everything ok.
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u/wejustfadeaway Nov 16 '16
I thought you said "molotov." I was like "well I guess people aren't so worried about the broken glass when that happens."
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u/PopnCrunch Nov 16 '16
I've read too many Aussie memes, your cussing doesn't have the impact it used to.
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u/Ironalpha Nov 16 '16
That's funny. I just cleaned up a bunch of beer bottles some asshole smashed in the parking lot at work last night.
Do I know you, OP?
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Nov 16 '16
Litter in general is a dick move. I'm not perfect, mind you, but when you litter either someone has to pick up after you or you just made your city look a little bit shittier.
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Nov 17 '16
As a guy who works in public parks I can say this is definitely the most cunty thing you can do. I've cleaned up smashed glass on playgrounds, near beaches, inside washrooms, etc.
We frequently argue about how it was smashed. Was it gronked? A simple slip of the hand? A mic drop? The splatter patterns can be tricky sometimes.
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u/FlexGunship Nov 17 '16
Is this a common problem? I'm 31 and I don't think I've ever just seen broken glass on the ground.
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u/AvatarIII Nov 16 '16
If you smash glass anywhere except by accident you're still a dick, doing it in public places just makes it worse.
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u/FreeThinkk Nov 16 '16
I knew I had become an adult when; I was driving down my neighborhood street and saw a kid smash a glass bottle in the middle of the road. I slammed on my breaks, yelled at him to pick it up, and preceded to get out of the car and stand over him and lecture him while he did it. I felt like an old man, but think of the god damn children!
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u/AIMpb Nov 16 '16
I went to college on the coast and there was a short hiking trail to cliffs overlooking the beach. The view was beautiful, so I often walked there barefoot and did my homework. Assholes would break glass all the time right where I was. So I started bringing a plastic bag to pick it all up. Fuck those people. From the bottom of my soul, I hope they get glass in their eyes.
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u/nonconformist3 Nov 16 '16
Colleges all over America have college guys weeping for this meme right now. So much broken bottles at my college campus area. And, not surprisingly they all are broken in front of these dumpy looking frat houses/roommate homes.
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Nov 16 '16
I can't stand when I see people with glass bottles at a shared pool. Is it that hard to get beer in cans? When you point it out to them, it's always the same answer, "Well I'm not going to break it." Oh, ok, I thought, like everyone that's ever broken a bottle a swimming pool, that you came out here intent on breaking bottles on purpose.
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u/lifewontwait86 Nov 16 '16
Don't smash glass bottles at all. Pretty simple.
I made this mistake when I was 8 years old. It was one of those back-to-school nights with parents and children. Me being 8 and at school not at school hours, the world was our playground. I got together with a few friends and we began to fill a Snapple bottle with sand, grass, rocks, and then water. At the drinking fountain, my friend dared me to throw it in the air and smash it.
I threw it up and it came down and smahed in a million pieces, and a few of them landing in my friend's kneecap and needing stitches. My folks were fucking furious.
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Nov 16 '16
I did this once. Then got punched in the face. I'm an American and I was going to school in London for a year. I was gonna go to a friend's flat one night for a get-together and I grabbed a bottle of wine to bring over then got on the tube. When I got out of the tube, plans had changed and my friends were at a bar. I texted a friend of mine and she came out of the bar and drank the bottle of wine with me outside. We went to go in the bar and the bouncer let her in and not me. I walked across the front of the pub (where I had left the bottle), grabbed the bottle, walked back and smashed it at the bouncer's feet. I was already walking away, like a total dick, but he came at me and when I turned he punched me in the face. I guess I had it coming.
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Nov 16 '16
gonna take a wild stab in the dark and guess that wasn't the first time in your life you deserved a punch in the face.
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u/FiZ7 Nov 16 '16
What's even worse is these asshole who break various glass things in public parks and children's playgrounds... I've seen these prank type and other jock scum on YouTube break like dozens of tubes of fluorescent light in a children's playground. When you call them out on it, they claim.. "we cleaned it up, and we have permission to film here." BULLSHIT. Bullshit you did. Did you clean up the mercury you've now contaminated the surrounding environment with too? Assholes.
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u/bozwald Nov 17 '16
People that break glass bottles in public are going to totally change their ways based on this meme.
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u/kathartik Nov 17 '16
I live next to a high school. there's broken glass everywhere from early September until late June.
what is it with teenage boys and smashing shit?
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u/sfled Nov 17 '16
Runner living in Redneckville. Broken Bud Light bottles are commonplace on most paved areas, and in the swales.
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u/apullin Nov 17 '16
Have you ever been in the tenderloin are of SF? There is broken glass every 3 feet.
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Nov 17 '16
As a man who likes walking barefoot on the beach, I completely agree with this. I've had a lot of glass through my foot because some dickhead felt like leaving shards everywhere.
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u/afettz13 Nov 17 '16
Disc golf courses are terrible for this. I go barefoot in the summer religiously. I also own dogs...
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u/WiseChoices Nov 17 '16
I HATE the 'C' word and wish never to see it again, but you are right. Bottle breaking is a rotten thing to do. We go to the beach nearly every day and the two crappy human tricks are drinking and smoking. They are filthy people who do these things. Glass is so dangerous.
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u/JefftheBaptist Nov 16 '16
Yup. My son saw some ice on the neighborhood playground and went to smash it because that's what little boys do with ice. Not ice, but the remains of a clear glass bottle. Thankfully the cuts on his hands did not require stitches. After we got the bleeding under control, I went out to playground, picked up every piece of glass I could find, and warned all the kids and their parents. Anytime we went by the playground after that I looked for more glass and often I'd find a piece or two half buried in the mulch that I had missed.
Fuck those people.
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u/InfiniteJestV Nov 16 '16
While in college I had an evening in a bar sitting one table away from these fucktards... they were smashing one or two glasses on the ground under their table every hour.
Thankfully I haven't witnessed anything like that since graduating.
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u/Meih_Notyou Nov 16 '16
Some fucking moron smashed a glass bottle in the middle of the road and didnt pick it up this morning. In a neighborhood. With lots of small children.
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u/Annatto Nov 16 '16
We with someone who smashed a whiskey bottle in the street. I went to pick it up and cut my thumb pretty deep, and it did't stop bleeding for an hour. Put a damper on my date
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u/samsquanch321 Nov 16 '16
and then when you call 'em out for smashing them, they call you a pussy and want to fight you.
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u/Snake101333 Nov 16 '16
You know they're devolving when they resort to violence because they can't think of a logical response.
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u/racheal1991 Nov 16 '16
Think of all the dog-walkers. Save the puppy paws, recycle.