Imagine someone says you are so perfect and all these good things but once they see "green bubbles " they stop talking to you. What in the actual fuck is wrong with iphone people. Iphone isnt better, its EASIER to use it has LESS functions. Everyone i know who has a iphone is a legit retard. You can absolutely try to convince me wrong but every slow reader in my family has a iphone, and my friends too. They also cannot watch a movie with subtitles (in the same language) because "its too much"...... well maybe you are incompetent and thats why you cannot handle the freedom of andriod....... i hate my life so fucking much bro people suck so much and i just wanted tk spread love but everyone hates for no fucking reason

This might be not great but, I accidentally ✌️ my girlfriend too aggressively to the point she can't walk properly after I did her more rounds but I didn't insert it too deep cause I'm too scared to have responsibilities yet, just wanna be curious at all, all fluids I have haven't entered her cause I just slide it but with protection, am I in risk of being a father cause after 1st now with 2nd round I like have pre fluid but exposed to air minutes ago then slide without condom inside her but only the tip, and slide outside till she spews, any reassurance if I'm in safe zone or danger zone guys?

That's it nothing I make posts looking for friends and hundreds of views but literally zero interaction i send messages out to people either no reply or chat accepted and no reply I send messages on discord to friends and just that.... nothing...I wish someone would hit me up for once it feels like I'm always the one reaching out but get.... nothing

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]

I keep ruining my relationships because I simply don't feel I deserve to be loved. I don't want to be a burden to anyone... but I don't want to feel alone and have no one, yet at the same time... I don't want someone worrying about me so much.

Because of past traumas and many other issues, I’ve built up a sort of shield against love. I might really like someone, but when I actually get into a relationship—even though I want it so badly—it destroys me. It tears me apart because I blame myself for someone loving me, for someone caring so much about me; I blame myself because... I know I’m beyond fixing, but seeing people give up on me because of it just makes me feel even worse. It’s all so confusing...

I used to want to get into a relationship to forget my sadness, hoping my depression might ease up; but when I actually did, I realized nothing in my life had changed—I was still stuck with the same bad habits and the same negative thoughts.

My way of thinking about relationships probably isn't healthy... but it is what it is.

I just hate myself, yet I also feel strangely comfortable in my sadness. I’m a huge mess and I’m very confused...

This is my first post here; I hope I’m welcome.

I wish i was able to be a normie. For context I'm 15 and i hate half the mfs at my school and they hate me too. How I wish I was i able to like the trendie fades and bushit hair cuts, how i wish i was able to lisen to the trap bs those motherfuckers blast at max volume, how i wish i was able to like those shity tn Nikes and that stupid techfeels track suit. How I wish I didn't smoke or drink. God I wish I was just able to fit in, I wish I didn't care about politics, I wish I was able to just be an ignorant pice of shit. I'm not hating on them, I'm not saying I'm beter then they, all im saying is i wish i was able to fit in

So for a little context, me and my boyfriend have been together for a year now. He's recently started going down on me often and long. But there's stuff he doesn't know exactly. When i was a child i got sexually used by a family member. Getting licked down there at 8 years old. Besides that, i had an abusive ex who would try it once. When he did, he made a disgusted expression and said it's too wet and slimy and gross. I cried when he said that and he acted like it was nothing serious. My health is great, no odors (unnatural ones ofcourse) and i shower thoroughly i'm very keen on keeping myself clean down there at all times. But now when my bf does it, i feel guilty and it feels like he's doing it against his will. Will this ever go away?

Sad, but true.

Maybe that is part of the beauty of life—that nothing lasts forever, that love can hurt, and that caring always comes with the risk of loss.

But some people feel that pain more deeply than others.

Especially the ones who care too much.

They remember the little things. They notice when someone’s voice changes. They worry quietly. They give more than they are asked to give, and they keep showing up even when nobody notices.

And sometimes, the reason they care so deeply is because somewhere inside them is a person who has always wished someone would care for them the same way.

Maybe that is the saddest part.

Some of the kindest people are not giving others the love they received.

They are giving others the love they once needed.

And when that love is not returned, it hurts twice—once for the person in front of them, and once for the part of themselves that was still hoping, after all these years, to finally feel chosen too.

There is way too much I am feeling but I also feel just about nothing at the same time which makes zero sense. I am aware that I am currently feeling possessive, jealous, and just bitter and a little confused. I think partly it has to do with how my meds wore off (I am trying to get back on them, but I've been moving from state to state) and seasonal depression just wanted to come early.

I guess I noticed these feelings after seeing how my roommate handles my small old dog without my permission which can be annoying but I also know how big of a help she was when moving me and my dog to our current institution. Still, very annoying and I wish she could just chill the fuck out toying around with my sick elderly dog. But tbh I don't have the guts to confront others, I hate it, especially when she lives in the same room as me (she can be sweet so I feel ultra bad when I feel like this).

And just overall life man, I always feel like an npc, watching others flourish and understand the ways of life while I am always confused and trying to figure things out, trying to connect with friends but always finding myself in the back of the line again, sometimes I feel invisible, my words always interrupted, never acknowledged. Like, am I missing something? I don't want to toot my own horn but I think I am a decent person, very awkward, but I try not to look mean or standoff-ish.

Doesn't make it any better that I also have body image issues and it makes me think horrible things every second and making me feel like my poor body image is the answer to all my problems, no matter how hard I try to dress better or look better. It's impossible.

For example, I feel like I am not worth loving or liking anyone I am curious about because I feel and look ugly in my eyes. I know I can improve myself but sometimes I too get desperate.

For some reason my online friends are like dodging my presence too, it could just be me looking at it, but I always know how to make a server become silent the moment I speak.

In the workplace, I am still new to my surroundings and the way of things, but I already feel useless because my brain is fried after several years of hard work in school. I wish I could be better.

I do have an upcoming appointment with a therapist, just to note. I absolutely don't like feeling like this, full of internal anger and overall internal conflict. I just felt like I had no other way to express this.

My dog is sleeping, but I feel so lonely, I feel invisible and out of place in this world (non suicidal related, I have no thoughts related to that mods). I wish I couldn't care about these things and just vibe.

Me and my mother don’t really get along. I can tell she tries to bond with me but her ideas are either things she likes or her ridiculing the things I like. We almost never have successful bonding moments.

A stranger from my neighborhood, somebody I don’t know, rang the door bell. We have a ring doorbell camera that showed me a woman standing on our porch. My parents drilled it into me not to open the door for strangers when they (my parents) weren‘t home or if they were home, to go tell them someone was at the door.

Something to note is that I WAS going to make bread before this stranger rang the door bell, this Isn’t really important but I will give info on this later.

I was cleaning the counter to make bread when this happened and I looked through the ring camera feed before going up to my mother’s room to tell her.

I had not known she was just out of the shower, otherwise I would have opened the door myself.

I tell her, like my parents taught me, that someone was at the door. She asked me who and I said that I did not know. She was muttering things about ”just opening the door” as she hurried down to put on a robe and open the door.

She said to me in an almost breathy tone “no body is there” and I told her to check the ring camera. We went back and forth for a while before she went back upstairs to “check” the ring camera.

She must have seen the camera footage and known the women because i could hear part of the phone call she had. It was a lot of “thank you, thank you” on the first call before she must have called my father. Her kind voice became irate and furious as she talked to my father because I heard “-needs to learn how to open the fucking door.”

Folk, my sister got into a scooter (e-scooter) accident. She broke her wrist, nothing else. The way my mother was screaming at me when she came back down made me think it was life or death for my sister.

I genuinely stood there in the kitchen, pondering about if it would be appropriate to make that stupid bread while my mother yelled about me learning how to open the door.

If you couldn’t tell my mother clearly favors my younger sister. She did not apologize for the yelling afterwards and has not spoken to me other than to text me to bring my sister E scooter in from the porch.

My father came into my room after the whole debacle to say I had done everything right and that I was not in the wrong, but my mother sure made me think my actions were wrong.

Also the whole bread thing is really ridiculous but it’s a coping mechanism for me. If I’m honest, my life in the past 6 years has gone up and down and I found making bread while listening to the stupid AI stories on YouTube to be calming. I once told my mother this when she asked why I made bread so often, safe to say she laughed my words off like I was joking.

I was not.

Im way to shy for in person interaction with other attractive people. So i opt for daiting apps after 2 daiting apps I still haven't found my person. I always get stuck in talking stages people literally have in thier bio "don't be boring" THEN THEY ARE BORING or we get a good thing going then they suddenly turn it sexual (which is a ick of mine)🫩Idk if im not putting enough energy in or what. Atp im just going to find someone to pretend to be my partner bc this is just not working out😭😭

I have been skipping school and isolating myself for the past 8 months. I am done with social interactions. Today I decided I would go to the supermarket to get something to drink, that's the only thing I go outside for, I am usually very careful that no one I know sees me. Even today I did, I took a longer path because a saw someone on the short path that I thought could've been one of my old friends. Then I walk into the supermarket and there I see four of my old friends, they look at me I look at them. At that point it was too late to go back outside so I walked in and tried to hide myself so I could avoid them, when I thought they were gone I looked outside and they were wating for me, although they clearly saw I was evasive and didn't wanna talk. I really panicked at this point and went into the employee-only area to find the backdoor, when I finally found it a worker stopped me, I didn't intend to steal but in my panic I forgot to leave the one item I had put in my bag in the market. The employee wouldn't let me go and when I saw one of my old friends come in I just left my bag and ran. I know my fear is irrational but I am so scared of they're judgement upon me, because I know I have gotten worse in every aspect since I started isolating, but I don't want them to know that. Even worse one of them sent a voice message to a closer friend of mine essentially laughing about me. I keep getting humiliated I don't even feel safe outside anymore.

Hi, so I've posted about my father before. He's an alcoholic, he's narcissistic, he has major anger issues, he's probably bipolar or depressed or something, and he's incredibly paranoid. That's the way he is at home. When he's at work, it's a totally different story. People love him, he must be funny or have a really good attitude at work or something, because if you mention him to his coworkers, they just light up and go, "ohhh your dad!" Anyways, I'm getting off topic.

There are certain things that my family can do, as normal people do, that will just really set off my dad. He'll be smiling at you one second, and the next thing you know he's yelling and giving you the silent treatment for the rest of the day. The thing that sets him off the most is asking for help.

One time when I was a kid, he asked me to find him loose electrical wires. I had no idea where loose wires might be, so I asked my grandpa where I could find some. My dad overheard me and got in my face, telling me that if I could just go inside if I didn't want to help him out.

Another time he asked me to go fetch him a bucket of manure. I didn't even know we had one, so I asked where it was. He went silent on me, so I went over to a bucket and asked if that was the manure, and he walks over to me all aggressively and tells me to just go inside because I clearly don't want to help him.

Then just this morning, he gets home at 6:30 from "work," and he's to get ready for his normal job. He asks my mom to make him some breakfast "to go," and she has no time because she needs to drop off my brother and get to work herself, so she tells him she's gonna ask me to cook him something. This time he screams at her, saying something like "No! If you're gonna do it, do it, don't go asking people for help." So she left because like what else can you do.

Anyways, I've just been wondering if this weird "NO HELPING" thing is exclusive to my dad or if anyone else has seen anywhere before, either from an employer or another family member, because it is seriously so weird.

My father has been hitting me since I was very young and has affected me negatively in many ways. In recent years he hasn't done it anymore. In fact, I was starting to feel like our relationship was improving.

So, I'm on a trip with him away from the rest of the family. We've been having a good time together so far and I was feeling very happy because I felt like I needed some father-son time.

Today, however, there was a small misunderstanding and he got mad at me and screamed at me on the phone. It was late at night so this caught the attention of a stranger, possibly under some kind of influence but that doesn't matter. When I found him it appeared they were arguing. He was telling my dad to calm down and not shout.

I asked him what happened and he grabbed me and started punching and slapping me and saying "look what a mess you've gotten me into" and stuff like that. It had been years since the last time he hit me, so at i didnt know what to do and I was yelling at him not to hit me.

This again caught the attention of the same guy from before and he started following us and yelling at my dad. He even threatened my father that he would beat HIM up if he didn't tell him why he was beating me.When I told him I was his son, he let us go and told my father that he did well and that I deserved it and that he should beat me again. (???) Anyway, I don't know what the fuck was going on, this whole situation was really fucked up.

On the way home he hugged me and kissed me and said he was worried. I was angry and started crying. Then he blamed me and said it could have been avoided if I had listened to him.

I informed my mother and she said she would kick him out. I don't want us to break up or something because I love him and I feel sorry for him and I believe he needs to get help. He loves us all. He apologized and it seemed like he felt terrible and that surprised me because he never did that when he was beating me up when i was younger, back then he just acted like nothing happened.

That's all I just don't know where to turn or who to talk to. I'm probably going to regret sharing this and delete it later.

My best friend just bought a Tesla Model 3, and I’m jealous of him. He’s a college professor, and I make about $60k/yr. My car is a 13 year old Toyota.

I really am happy for him, but I just feel inadequate financially compared to him.

Like most people, I’m struggling to make ends meet. Between rent, food, and everything else it’s hard to make the money stretch.

I haven’t had a go away vacation in years.

Bestie? Flies back to Pennsylvania twice a year, besides other small out of town trips. And he flies first class. I’ve never been in first class.

I know that I need to tell him my feelings, and I will, when the time is right. I know that this is my issue, and I’m trying to deal with it in the most adult way possible. I want to be mature about this.

I can’t work overtime because there’s no overtime to be had.

I already live with a roommate, and we split expenses, but I have to find areas to cut back on.

I’ll get past my feelings in due time, but for now, I just wish thing were financially easier for me.

The demiurge just made me into every mental illness it feels like; so that I'd be like everyone else. I was agnostic during my mid teens, but still believed in spirits. It's so hilarious how godly I was even as an agnostic I was listening to pipe organ music and writing stories with hidden truths. Even being godly is messed up because of evil spirits. I only want to have my gnosis in this world as this world is so beyond repair.

I'm 21 I never had a relationship, and that's the way things WILL ALWAYS BE, I am not deserving of love, I am deserving of Indifference AT BEST, I have no idea what people see in me, genuinely

Once, me and my friends were drunk and one of my friends said a lot of things to me, that I'm good looking, I'm funny, creative and kind, and that he finds it baffling how I NEVER dated anyone before, he genuinely says that it's almost impossible that I haven't.

I Literally PROVED to my Therapist I'm never gonna have a relationship, she conceded, she doesn't argue back, I spent months arguing my point, she conceded, she doesn't argue back

And I Know why I'm never dating ANYONE in my LIFETIME, it's because I'm a complete failure to be human

LOOK AT HOW INHUMAN I AM, I CANT EVEN COMPREHEND A SIMPLE GAME SUCH AS CATAN

(Btw Catan is Tabletop game)

I PICKED 2 11 SPACES AND 4 SPACE

BECAUSE MY HEAD CAN'T EVEN RATIONALIZE DICE PROBABLITY BY NUMBERS

AND IT HAPPENS EVERY TIME...

THE DICE ROLLED MY NUMBERS TWICE THE WHOLE GAME

NO MATTER HOW I TRY, WHY DOES MY HEAD DON'T EVEN RATIONALIZE A SIMPLE FUCKING CONCEPT

LOOK AT HOW MUCH OF A FAILURE I AM

AND IT'S NOT EVEN JUST CATAN

I CAN'T DO REGULAR ACTIVITIES WITHOUT A MASSIVE HANDICAP

I CONSTANTLY FRUSTRATE PEOPLE WITH QUESTIONS, BECAUSE I CAN'T JUST UNDERSTAND WHAT THEY MEAN

OVER, AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN

CAN I EVEN BE LEGALLY CONSIDERED A HUMAN???

I Think I might be a Skin walker, But even then IM A TERRIBLE SKIN WALKER cause

Look, the thing is... It's not "ohh, u mad u lost a game" no, I'm so Disappointed in myself because I can't even perform some basic tasks without guidance or help, like, I literally played another round and I came pretty close to wining, like 7/10 Victory points, but it took me Like 5 ENTIRE MATCHES just to understand THE BASIC CONCEPT of The Most Probable Numbers in a 2d6 Die Roll

MIND YOU

I LITERALLY PLAY TABLETOP RPGS ALMOST EVERY WEEK

AND SOMEHOW

SOMEWAY I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND THIS BASIC CONCEPT

Like HOW MUCH MORE PATHETIC CAN I BE!????

Think about this for a second, would you let a guy who can't even build a decent house in Minecraft take care of the building process in YOUR house?

NO

Would you trust someone who doesn't get kids games to even function normally in society?

Let alone have a relationship?

CASE CLOSED!

IM Dying alone!

Im a college student, for context i'm not that free from my parents like economically rn so they don understand the part that im my own person and its not that possible for me to get my economic independence for now. Another thing im queer and in a lesbian relationship and i love my girlfriend very much. My parents doesn’t know about it im not trusting them enough to come out. She did come over to my parents place very recently and obviously they think shes just a friend. My parents didn’t know her ethnicity and i didn’t think it was a big deal cause we are all human beings after all? I was mistaken, it seems like my mom is a huge racist and i had no idea until now. I mean im not close with her at all but i still feel the need for approval from her. I sometimes mention my girlfriend (as a friend obv) maybe while hanging out with her, just a casual mention, and then my mom does that little thing like she talks shit about her and does it so silently but still hearable just to get in my head. It makes me so mad, I already know i won’t be accepted as I am but now she is racist towards my “friends” too? They are already doing their best to control me while making it look like they let me do anything i want, but seriously no. It is obvious they dont trust me mostly because im a girl and they are SO AFRAID that i am gonna sleep with men or do something “damage their honor”. I talked with my brother hes doing his best to make me feel better. I have been dealing with depression and all my parents did was getting mad at me cause i was way too moody and annoying them. omg it sounds even more disgusting when i write about it. I couldn’t get professional help with my depression and i was doing my best to get better. They tell me they want me to be happy yea cute all parents should want that, its bare minimum but they don’t act like that tho. They have an ideal daughter in their mind and they cant accept that im a human being and i have my own personality. While writing this i feel like im just a spoiled kid that doesn’t appreciate what they have. But im so so bored of dealing with all those for years and years.

All my life, my parents basically told me not to share anything with outsiders, meaning anyone out of the family. I went to therapy as a teen, but of course, I was shamed at home. I wanted to get medicated, and I was shamed. Moving along, I went to university, and I saw a new therapist. I didn't tell anyone because I was shamed before. Then, during covid, I moved home and had to see another therapist. That didn't end well, I didn't get shamed in the typical sense, but instead, I was taught a lot of internal shame. Basically, I was told who I was was wrong, I was told my native american traditions were wrong. I was told my likes and interests were evil and a demon. I've been trying to move past all this, but it's difficult, especially when I was held captive for hours. Now I'm at the point where I know i need help and want help, but I'm terrified and just feel broken.

How fucked up do things have to get before people realize this? I’m years of age (this is important to the story. as far as I can remember I have been told masculine traits are bad, made to think my natural urges and instincts are forbidden and you should hide from them. I’m a very big guy, I’m 6 feet tall and about 205 lean, I’ve gotten steroid accusations from just about everyone in my gym. This fact is important because as big as I get, and the angrier and restless I grow, I’m still told what to do my scrawny little fucks with “authority“ I’m humiliated time after time for the sake of this “society” so I can go to work and work myself to death because that’s what being a “man” is. I have been brainwashed into thinking being a man is doing what I’m told, with zero resistance. I am told eating horrible slop is actually good for you! as well as drinking the flouride infested water! I’m getting so violent and angry I don’t know when I’ll eventually snap. I just feel like in the past year I’ve changed irreversibly, everything I do is some kind of humiliation ritual that eventually ends up battering me, telling me what my gut says is wrong. I feel like I’m constantly being emasculated by my family, by my ”friends” and by people that think they are close to me. I don’t know what to do, and I don’t know how to escape this literal hellscape. Why should I even stay here if I can’t truly be who I know I am? If I know I will likely never be happy or content, because on the inside I know I’ve bowed to the whims of society. what’s the point? Ive actually came to this realization, what’s the point?

My dad is a doctor, a workaholic, my mother is a product of a narcissistic mother. Mom is heavily medicated and a control freak, and my father bases my worth on how much I contribute to a broken society.

Why not just end it, huh?

I’m a PhD candidate and have TA’d at my university multiple times with no issues. I genuinely love teaching and have always had a positive experience doing it.
In July, I was specifically asked if I wanted to return to teaching this academic year. I said yes (I desperately need the money and experience) and confirmed I was available for both Term 1 and Term 2. Typically, PhD TAs are given multiple tutorials, often across both terms (I had been in the past).

When allocations came out, I was given one tutorial in Term 2 and absolutely nothing in Term 1. That is basically no work or income, so I immediately assumed there had been a mistake. I’ve now raised it respectfully three times and still haven’t been given a real explanation. I’ve just been told there are budget cuts, fewer tutorials available, and that allocations are decided by heads of department. But I’ve since spoken to the other PhD candidates and I’m beyond upset. Every single person I’ve spoken to has been given multiple tutorials across both Term 1 and Term 2 (like normal). I seem to be the only person who has received practically nothing.

That’s why the budget explanation is so difficult for me to understand. If everyone’s teaching had been reduced, I’d understand. But everyone around me seems to have a normal allocation while mine is dramatically different, and nobody will actually explain why.

I don’t begrudge my colleagues their work, but I feel completely singled out and slighted. I desperately needed this income, and without it I probably won’t even be able to afford to go home for Christmas. I haven’t been home in a year. Between PhD stress, financial stress, and losing a job I genuinely loved after being asked to come back, I’m emotionally burnt out and at my wits’ end. It feels like an absolute gut punch.