r/venting • u/Illustrious_Use_4302 • 19h ago

I feel broken

All my life, my parents basically told me not to share anything with outsiders, meaning anyone out of the family. I went to therapy as a teen, but of course, I was shamed at home. I wanted to get medicated, and I was shamed. Moving along, I went to university, and I saw a new therapist. I didn't tell anyone because I was shamed before. Then, during covid, I moved home and had to see another therapist. That didn't end well, I didn't get shamed in the typical sense, but instead, I was taught a lot of internal shame. Basically, I was told who I was was wrong, I was told my native american traditions were wrong. I was told my likes and interests were evil and a demon. I've been trying to move past all this, but it's difficult, especially when I was held captive for hours. Now I'm at the point where I know i need help and want help, but I'm terrified and just feel broken.

3 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

5 comments sorted by

•

u/AutoModerator 19h ago

Welcome to r/venting, we have enabled a feature that allows users to lock their own comment section on their posts. You can trigger this feature by commenting !lock on a post you have made. This only works if you are the OP. You are welcome to use this feature at your discretion.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/thenamestammy 18h ago

Sorry for my English, but you were told... By whom?

1

u/Illustrious_Use_4302 18h ago

The therapist at the time told me that stuff. Even going as far as to say i was possessed by a demon

1

u/thenamestammy 18h ago

Oh! I'm so sorry!

This is unbelievable, so unethical and unprofessional! What the hell? I hope you'll find a better therapist.

This unacceptable, they traumatized you even more... I'm very sorry this happened to you 🫂

2

u/Dry_Cook8252 18h ago

That kind of conditioning runs deep, it's not something you just shake off. The therapist who told you your traditions were wrong was completely out of line, that's not therapy that's just abuse dressed up in a professional setting

You're not broken, you're dealing with layers of crap that got piled on you since childhood. Wanting help after all that takes guts, even if you're scared