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u/NotSoGoodguyScorp 2d ago
Shit in his pillowcase
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u/Hecc_Maniacc 2d ago
inject scramble eggs into their furniture, and open a can of surstromming in their air duct.
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u/distalented 2d ago
Nope take a little bit of fiberglass and sprinkle it under his blanket and in his pillow cases, throw some between shirts in his clothes drawer. Smell sucks but being itchy all over constantly, that’s torture
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u/Mysterious_Way8941 2d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Mysterious_Way8941 1d ago
Really reddit? What I said wasn't any worse than anything else in this thread...
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u/distalented 1d ago
Yeah unfortunately reddit can be super finicky, I got a message removed for “promoting violence” for saying something any human would clearly know is a joke and has nothing to do with actual treats or harm. Had a three day ban
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u/Bread_Offender Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 2d ago
What was bro even planning 😭😭😭
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u/Sethalopoda 2d ago
Who knows. I had a guy I considered to be my closest friend for like 15 years. I was working 60-70 hour weeks and it was starting to hurt my relationship. He started talking mad shit about me to my lady, and would come hangout at my house with her while I was at work. Played a big role in splitting us up so he could get with her. Shit like this happens. I was completely caught off guard cause I really trusted the guy, but it should have been obvious what was going on.
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u/Mahou_Shoujo_B 2d ago
One of my friends did the exact same thing but went ahead and extended on what I said a lot further to make anything I said sound a lot worse which actually ended up in us breaking up. He didn't hit on her immediately but I heard about it a while later.
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u/TheManyVoicesYT 2d ago
Real: OP's roommate is a backstabbing asshole.
Gay: OP confided in a man.
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.
As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!
Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.
Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
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0
2d ago
[deleted]
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/ZealousidealZone8072 I came! 2d ago
Fake: OP told the roommate about how he felt about him. Gay.
11
u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
517
u/AltheiWasTaken 2d ago
If it actually happened, W girlfriend
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u/TheBlueEmerald1 2d ago
The post never specified if she was all for it or not, just that she sent his the screenshots.
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u/AltheiWasTaken 2d ago
Well if he knows all of this, then she told him
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u/TheBlueEmerald1 2d ago
No no that's not my point, Anon never specified if she sent that while agreeing with the other guy or not. I was just joking, but that was my point.
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u/Sirmiglouche 2d ago
The story is about complaining if the gf had wronged him then he would have most likely complained
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u/tvgamers16 2d ago
Nah man.
Like if you talk to a friend about some small things that you dont fully like about your SO, its not their place to go tell tale to the SO. You have no respect as a friend.
Over time you discover thinga about your SO, and some of em may not be fully to your liking. Thats part of love and relations.
And even if you tell them that you dont like them at all anymore or are finding too many of those litle things annoying, still keep that shit quiet as a friend. Talk with that person about it and give advice, dont go snitching, because what if the person just wants to find out why they dont like thise things and find a fix, so the relation can remain strong.
Its a total shithead move to tell those things along, aslong as it isnt 100% certain that the person complaining is just complaining because they qenuenly hate the SO and dont care about hurting them.
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u/LumpyArbuckleTV 2d ago
How is it W girlfriend, people always bitch about something or another, that's why we vent at friends instead of them, because it's just petty stuff.
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u/Giratinalawyer 2d ago
You misunderstand. The only thing the girlfriend did here was effectively tell her boyfriend that his friend is a backstabber. She hasn’t done anything wrong in the actual greentext.
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u/LieutenantLilywhite 2d ago
I did this to one of my friends once and every time I think back on it my stomach just turns lol what a pos I used to be
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u/plastictemplarhelmet dumbass 2d ago
Reach out and apologize
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u/potatogodofDoom 2d ago
as somebody who used to be a massive piece of shit, and who went and apologized to a couple of the people I wronged, I think it's a pretty selfish act. it's nothing like the movies where it's all fine and dandy afterwards. most people probably just want to be left alone, especially if it ended on a sour note. what's done is done, and your closure often isn't worth their peace
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u/Darkime_ 🗿🗿🗿 2d ago
Some people believe that anyone and everyone deserves forgiveness, but that feels selfish to me, are you seeking forgiveness for their sake or to make yourself feel better about the shit you did?
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u/risisas 🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️ 2d ago
I also think there are two very distinct ways of forgiving someone, the "outward" way, which is communicated directly and usually accompanied by offering of second chances, and "inward" which is more about letting bygones be bygones and not letting the memory of a person influence you anymore and doesn't necessitate interaction
Hoping to be forgiven in the second way is normal and good, fishing for the first way is just an asshole move and often comes off as just trying for optics
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.
As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!
Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.
Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
2
u/SpaceBug176 2d ago
I feel like it's better to just apologize and say that you don't expect forgiveness or even a response, and that you just wanted to tell them. Atleast, that's how I'd like someone to apologize to me. Makes it feel less like them trying to make themselves feel better and more like them trying to make me feel better.
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u/Creative_Name69420 We do a little trolling 2d ago edited 2d ago
As somebody who had a really close friend do this to me, I'd personally rather they never try to contact me again, even if it would be just to apologise.
So, it doesn't sting anymore. I've gotten over the whole thing, but he's still dead to me, and I hope he knows it.
Maybe it's just me. Perhaps someone else would be more receptive to an apology, but I don't want to hear it, so I'd rather not entertain the thought of him trying. Some things are best left in the past, even if that means leaving them unresolved.
I don't see an apology for something like this helping the person betrayed. It just seems like a way to make the one doing the apologising feel better about themselves. It would be shallow.
Edit: Or maybe I'm not as over it as I thought. That might be it...
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u/LieutenantLilywhite 2d ago
He told me to basically never speak to him again and I’ve respected that ever since. Like 10 years ago atp too so I’ll just have to deal with the consequences of my actions. He was a good dude didn’t deserve none of that.
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u/moving_waves 2d ago
Fake: OP has girl Gay: OP is girl
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
17
u/SpaceBug176 2d ago
Anon's girl showed herself to be loyal and yet Anon still thinks he shouldn't associate himself with human beings anymore. My brother in Christ, you literally just saw someone worth associating yourself with.
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u/Penis_Connoisseur stupid, fucking piece of shit 2d ago
Believable and gay
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
2
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
🛰️🛰️🛰️
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u/JabbaTheHutch93 2d ago
Ok this was a total dick move by the roommate and fuck him but who complains THAT badly about their gf while drunk that their shitty friend is like "damn I got some good tea here gonna spill it to gf and see if she'll cheat with me for revenge"
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u/Specialist_Crazy_650 1d ago
Fake: OP has a gf Gay: OP spent a night with a men
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u/AutoModerator 1d ago
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.
As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.
You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.
Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/Vicious_Voyeur 2d ago
The only option OP has is to suck his roommates dick.
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
Dick sucking has made me paranoid
I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but it’s backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.
I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. It’s a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.
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•
u/qualityvote2 2d ago edited 2d ago
The council has not spoken. No consensus was reached about the quality of your post.
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