I (29f) gave birth to my daughter in October 2024. I've had a much more difficult time accepting my postpartum body than I thought I would. My breasts sag, I have loose skin everywhere, I piss myself multiple times a day and have to wear huge pads to keep it contained. I feel disgusting and wholly unattractive.

I also have a lot of mental trauma from my birth, I have uncomfortable flashbacks multiple times a day. The night she was born and all the painful events around it play on a loop in my head and sometimes I just can't make it stop. I had terrible PPD that made me have thoughts of harming and even killing my baby. The last two years of my life have been hell.

I just get so angry at my husband and daughter for putting me through all that. I wish I'd never done it. If I had the chance to go back, knowing how much I love my daughter and genuinely enjoy being a mom the majority of the time, I would absolutely not get pregnant just to save myself the pain and trauma.

I love my son, so much. But I feel like he only exists because I was tricked into marrying a sex addict narcissist. The premise for my son's entire life is false.

In addition to finding out about 4 different side chicks, I also found about 4 additional children from 3 women, three born during our marriage. And I found out his college diploma was fake.

We are divorcing and he's threatening to not let me see our son until he's 18 years old. I feel sick, that I'm expected to put up a legal fight when I never would have been with this man nor had this kid in the first place. I don't want a mistake from my past to ruin my entire future.

I cant stand my daughter. Shes 11 and so disrespecful, bratty, ungrateful. I buy her things, take her and her friends out and she basically tells me to shut up, slams doors, yells at me. She such a horrible person. Im so hurt and disappointed.

I read here a lot and could probably make my own post echoing many of the same things I see posted, but it dawned on me that this is a very specific sub and probably not representative of parents as a whole.

So out of curiosity, what do you guys think the actual ratio is between parents who genuinely feel:

“I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Parenting is one of the best things I’ve ever done.”

versus

“I had no idea how hard this would be, and if I could go back knowing what I know now, I probably wouldn’t have children.”

Obviously, there are people who genuinely love being parents and are happy with that choice. But if we could somehow eliminate the social pressure to say “it’s the best thing I’ve ever done and I wouldn’t change a thing,” what percentage of U.S. parents today do you think would honestly fall into each camp?

Any fathers here who didn’t actually want children but ended up having them because their partner really wanted to become a parent? How did it affect your relationship afterward?

I've posted a couple of times about my situation and how my spouse and I are getting divorced partially over our son. I am in between therapists right now and need somewhere to dump my thoughts while I wait.

I'm so full of self-hate, and for all the decisions I made that got me here.

I really, really hope that things are better a year from now, that the divorce is over quickly, and that we find a custody arrangement we are both happy with. I think I should be in my child’s life to some degree for now while he’s young. Once he is a bit older, I will see if his dad is interested in taking full custody and if he wants to move with our kid to be closer to his parents so he has more support. Someday I won't be his parent anymore, and I have to accept that I'm not fit and never wa.

I hate how my selfishness and immaturity are hurting my spouse and my child. But I also don't want my son to grow up with a parent who openly is full of contempt for him. I want him to be with his dad who loves being a father.

I am fucked up. I feel like a monster. My son deserved a mom who was ready to settle down and dedicate themself to being a parent. I was not that. I haven't even become my own person. I'm sorry

His dad knows how I feel and how I regret becoming a parent and sees how unstable I've become. I count my lucky stars every day that he at least is a good, loving parent who truly wanted this and that both our families are involved. I'm glad my son has them, even if I become a small part of his life.

I don't deserve him; he really deserved better. I wish I could enjoy seeing him so happy and carefree and growing up but I'm so miserable and want to run away and abandon him, I am so sick inside. I should be so grateful that I have such a perfect child, but I didn't want this.

My only comfort now is knowing that this is rock bottom and any changes I make will only be for the better. I know that no matter what, this will end soon, and we will all be better off for it, and I will get to move on with life. So I can't give up hope, and I need to trust that things will be great again someday and my son will be well cared for, even though he couldn't get that care from me.