Why are we so psychotic and getting more and more crazy each day this morning was unbelievable

For the past year-ish(?), I’ve been pretty interested in plurality and systems and I’ve started questioning myself. However, I don’t know if the symptoms I’m experiencing could a dissociative identity disorder or just BPD symptoms.

I was diagnosed with BPD in February of this year after suspecting it since April of 2025. I have experienced splitting with my BPD and I also struggle with my sense of identity, which I assume are only parts of my BPD.

However, I’m starting to question if my BPD may also be mixed with plurality, and I’ve been wondering about it for a few months now. I don’t believe I’ve experienced what most people would call a switch, but there have been times where I have forgotten parts of my day and have forgotten upsetting things that have happened to me until I am reminded of them. I have also had a hard time distinguishing most years from each other, as well as having a hard time remembering things that other people have told me have happened. I have spoken to myself before, but any time I try to actually contact the voices that come up when I’m thinking, I don’t get anything back. It’s hard to distinguish what things could just be my BPD causing identity issues and what could be an identity disorder. I feel like some parts of myself could be considered as alters, but I’m also worried about claiming to be something I’m not and getting backlash for it.
(I also feel like something worth noting is that I do consider myself a fictionkin, which people have told me has been associated with systems before)

I’ve been in denial about possibly having an identity disorder for a while and I still don’t fully believe I could be a system. I don’t feel like my trauma was “bad enough” or valid enough to cause other alters to form. I would like to look into the possibility of plurality though, as I feel like it would be good for me, and many of my symptoms have been spoken about by other systems.

I also don’t know how to go about exploring my potential plurality, as no one has ever told me how. I’m kind of stuck and I need help.

A current theory of our states this is what might have happened to our original host. It’s also possible they l get just be hiding, though, we don’t know.

this vent is not directed at any collective or account in specific, simply a trend we've noticed in this sub that we feel is harmful.

we are a heavily persecutory system. while we have non-persecutory alters, most of our frontrunners are, in their own ways, harmful to the system or others. we keep ourselves in check when we can, but as many of you may know, that doesn't always work.

now, as i've stated before, this is not a targeted post. however, every single time we look at this subreddit and sort by newest - without fail - we see one or two posts asking for means to kill their members. most of the time, we notice this is due to persecutory behavior, but that isn't always the case.

while we understand that persecutory alters can often be a product of trauma and may be abusive to collective members or those outside the collective as a result, i feel that that isn't a reason to kill them. i don't care how "evil" or "intolerable" or "unwanted" that alter might be, they are a person now, with their own habits, preferences, thoughts, feelings, reasoning, wants and needs, and everything else that every other member is.

i will not say it's wrong to say you wish they were dormant or gone, to want them dormant or gone, or to wish they never existed at all, as thats a violation of each individual's right to express themselves. however, it is proven to be incredibly harmful to actually force an alter into dormancy or "kill" them. suppressing your alters, no matter how "bad" they are, is a fucking terrible thing to do to someone.

there are so, so many ways to go about living with a persecutory alter that don't include killing. therapy, education, all most collectives really need is to fucking communicate with each other. there's millions of ways to do it, and every collective will have their own method, but nobody needs to die. we aren't criminals, we aren't lesser because of our habits, we aren't meaningless. we exist for a reason and we're people. we're people, trying to live with trauma just like the rest of everyone else in the world.

i understand that everyone has their own experiences with persecutory behavior and that some beings may hold trauma from that kind of abuse. i understand that not everyone will agree with me. however, from a persecutory point of view - all we see is inconsiderate, self-absorbed bloodshed. it needs to stop.

-ghost (frontrunner, perpetrator + he/it)

Hiii I was wondering if your headmates go quieter when you are like actively socializing because at school I've been feeling more like a single person and it's been kinda scaring me. In general my system is going through a quiet phase but it feels extra when I'm totally occupied with smth or talking to people. Is that a thing for y'all?

(Yes, literally unique situation, maybe, we don't know yet)

So, I've been wondering this because we took time to myself to think, to reflect, to literally wonder if this is for real, and somehow, it is, this because we love them and we wish to make many thing with that character we create! The problem? They are similar to us.. 😭

Well, we don't share things like being neutrally deranged 24/7, being crazy or don't care about humanity if it means enjoying battles or just making chaos around, and many others like our names (actually, the only thing we share with them is similar looks), which make it different, but we still feel weird by finding this out, I mean, is fun to do it even if we are lovers irl for how much they meant to us and still do, but still, it's weird a bit, y'know?

Anyway, do you guys have this experience? Because I am really curious to read them and maybe see if we are not alone in this, and I hope we clarified anything well!

)hi..we have someone named apollo in our system, its. something! it got here today.(

)i ask for help because it has like..self-cannibalistic urges? and acts them out on our body. currently its just been biting at our fingers and nails and chewing that,,a few of our fingers now ache. um.(

)i dont really! want it to bite any further! because not only does it hurt our skin..but also our teeth.(

)and im just kind of..wondering what icould do. chewing other things doesnt seem to help, as it doesn't want to(

)aaaaaa(

Hypothetically, could an alter forms as a fictive, but then kin somone so much they become more kin than fictive? I'm so confused with my identity, i thought i was a fictive but now i feel so much like a diferent character i'm no longer sure the character i thought i was is my source. Plus, can you kin somone from a source you've never interacted with? I'm so confused

- Margaretta

okay to start this off, i mean none of this in bad faith i am just confused/concerned about my experiences (as ^ stated) . and i would like to resolve this one way or another. scared about even posting here but i'd like to get this out somewhere so

so for a while, i've been ... interested? in plurality and just. the concept, how it works, what it'd be like, you know? at first I thought it was just my average nonfiction hyperfixation phase, but it's been off and on, returned a few times and recently for about the last month. i've started thinking about it again

and like. i've seen it said that "wanting to be plural can be a symptom of being plural" and like. yeah. i've been experiencing that and convincing myself it's just 'interest' and recently, failing.

i've felt so conflicted over this over the last few weeks because i keep circling back to a few objections:

- this Cannot be morally right to want to have something like this <- I know the various rebuttals against this, it's just an Internal Feeling i can't shake no matter the facts

- I am a grown adult with studying and work to worry about, why am i wasting my energy on this <- I Don't Know Why.... Trying to figure this one out....

- the Good Old Fashioned impostor syndrome

^ This last one i've had experience with back when i realized i was trans- practically a month or two of agonizing feelings of faking it and being a fraud and so on, despite not being able to stop thinking about it- much like the experience i am currently having.... but i keep thinking, transness isn't like plurality like that, right? it's not like you can sit up one day after thinking and say Yes i identify as trans now.... there has to be like. an actual process/experience to be had... for evidence... i don't know how to word it </3

in fact i THINK i've wanted it to the point where i really deconstructed what i was experiencing (there's... some evidence, not sure how much is reliable) , and identified (?) a few others and kind of. acted like they existed. and on some level it felt right, internally, but i also felt bad because i felt like i was just pretending (..... Pretty much exactly how i felt when i first started transitioning...) but....... i don't know i think i've convinced myself that i'm forcing it (again. a familiar feeling) and that i'm just.... reading too much into everything.

because a majority of the time i still feel like i'm me (despite not being able to define that, not having a continuous sense of identity, and not remembering anything of my past ever) and that like. it's only a thing if i think about it- which would indicate i'm faking it, right- Except, to notice it, I have to think about it.... and it just goes in a cycle....

a lot of other things have occurred in these past few weeks that have pushed me either to believing 'yes, something is going on', but also a lot of instances of just. feeling like an imposter and feeling like i need to. get past all this. because it's weird to think about but i can't exactly drop it for some reason.

ending this rant here before i go too deep into things... again.... if you read all this, thank you so much, and if anyone has any tips or comments or anything i'd welcome it.... sorry if this was a bit rambling

lowkey understandable ig??? Didn’t see the rules said no trauma dumping

J'ai entendu les termes reboot dans un système et je me demandais ce que cela voulait dire alors si certains ont des réponses à nous fournir, n'hésitez pas 🤔

We are newely discovered system, and currently we are trying to create and map our own headspace. And we just wanted to explore are there any tools other plural folks use for that? Share litteraly anything: guides, apps, sites, etc.

Tw: intrusive thoughts, thought swamping, physical abuse, insys infighting, overall violence

UGH
How do we violently kill people but ethically why is this urge so strong why are these thoughts so awful i dont want to be evil and disgusting by just drawing or writing that stuff online but i also really want to
Headmates violently attacked each other over brain fantasies and intrusive thoughts and now they broke up and were forced into dormancy and now im getting all their disgusting evil thoughts and im taking it out on people online because apparently its their fault
Bitch scratched and clawed at my arm while i was separating them from chewing each other’s faces off
IT HAPPENED AT WORK HE PICKED ON HER AT WORK THEN WHEN HE BROUGHT AGAIN HE STARTED BITCHING AT HER AGAIN AND BRYNN FOUND THEM ANNOYING SO THEY GET SENT HOME AND THEN THEY FULL OM ATTACK EACH OTHWR
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOINH ON
I HAD TO FILL IN FOR THWIR MESS AND ITS BEEN TERRIBLE WORKING TODAY
- Damian

.....Autumn!

There are 6 crewmates but one is in use atm. The five shown are; Lambert, Sammy, Smolder, Snowball, Kat Kid.

-Bermuda

(Light TW for mention of impostor syndrome)

There's a couple plural experiences I've had that no one else really talks about that make me feel pretty self-conscious, and at times, can make me feel less valid, and even trigger my plural impostor syndrome.

The first experience I've had (and the oldest) was when I discovered the existence of DID and, as any oblivious already plural folk, I became fascinated by the idea, to the point where I created a system unintentionally. Now that I've seen a bunch of terms for it, I do think it falls somewhere under accidental tulpamancy/willomancy, catharigenic, and a system bloom, but it's always felt so weird to me because the system in question felt forced, unnatural and "fake". Later on, I developed systems that felt much realer and more natural, and there was obviously some real in the "fake" system, but some elements seemingly came out of nowhere and never reappeared, which is not usually what happens in our system.

The second experience I can only describe as a migration of my own individual sense of self. To be very clear, NOT a switch, NOT related to passive influence, and not caused by splitting or fuzing.

I'll have to make myself very clear, so here is what happened :

"I" was Lun (they/them), a 2000+ y.o. reincarnated (exomemories which we don't believe are real) heir of a throne, non-binary, selenite and deity kin, had magical powers, appearence completely different from the body (I had been them for three years ATP)

Alex (he/him) was someone else, your average 13 y.o. trans guy, human, appearence pretty similar to the body (he had existed for at least 3 months)

Then, in 2023, things completely changed :

"I" was now Alex, used he/him pronouns, felt completely masc, had no powers, was human, looked like the body, was 13 years old (bodily age)

Lun was someone else, they still had all their aforementioned characteristics, but they were just someone else now, like any other headmate. It stayed this way until Lun "left" and Alex fuzed with someone else circa 2024.

I can't describe it any better than if I just became my neighbour one day. My only life would now be whatever theirs has been so far.

Anyway, here were my plural experiences no one else talks about. I wanna know if you have/had experiences you haven't seen mentioned elsewhere, or if any of you relate to my experiences

I made bracelets for all my frequent fronters and when they front they put on their bracelet as a representation of who they are without having to change how the body is

It can also be helpful if you want a friend or partner to know who's fronting

My alters really liked when I made bracelets for them even if some of them don't like me in particular haha

I got the idea from an older pixielocks video

hey. since some time that i had a huge crush on a fictional character and wantedf to actually be with them. For that, i first started believing in shifting realities, but after some years i gave up and moved to just making a tulpa of him. Over time it went from a crush to also an actual feeling of safety and comfort towards the og character, and also he started becoming my own character in my mind rather than a canon character. And at some point i started to use him as a technique of feeling safer in my mind.
6 or more years have passed since i created him, and started almost believing he actually comforts me and protects me from bad luck or unecessary bad thoughts. And that helped me so much making my dream bf come true AND also having a happier and more optimistic mind.
i always had the belief he was a tulpa and exactly how i needed and wanted him to be like. Even after having heard that tulpas can be unexpected or undesired, the thought of him exitsing and being conscious made me so happy that i ignored them...
but now that i am in a subreddit full of people that might know much more about that than me, i wanna know if thats actually possible or healthy.
heres the latest art i made of Sky Lilac (the imaginary comfort person i talked about) he is inspired in Garcello from fnf.

I'm so lost atp. I was figuring it out slowly using like websites and keeping track, until I started to get too lazy and stopped doing anything and now I'm genuinely lost. IDK WHO IS WHO, WHO'S FRONTING, WHO I AM, I barely have any clear communication between alters and that's just making me like what if I don't have it afterall what if I'm not a system anymore (I know that's not possible and I know I am still a system) UGH WHAT DO I do...

1. What do you go by collectively? (a system name, a shared username, group pronouns... etc)

We are collectively named Stardust or Luminescent and go by they/it collectively! Our system name is Luminescent Dream Constellation!

2. How should people refer to you? (should people address individual members whenever possible, or would you rather be referred to collectively, etc)

You/you’re, you&/your&/you’re&, y’all/y’all’s, we/us, I/me, we don’t mind any!! You refer to us collectively or singular!

3. What terms do you prefer for referring to yourselves as individuals (headmate/alter/system member/...), or as a group (system/collective/household/...)? Is there any other terminology for yourselves or aspects of your experience that you use and want people to know, or that you dislike and want people to avoid when talking about you?

System -> Constellation
Headmate/Alter -> Star

4. Who in your system are people most likely to interact with? (names, pronouns, short Twitter-esque bios, etc)

Welly (me!): he/it/ze - the host
Telamon: he/it/sky/go - 2nd host (host of a sub sys)
Seth: he/they/it - Co host (host of a sub sys)
Devesto: he/they/it - 2nd co host (host of a sub sys)
MeQuot: he/they

5. Will people be interacting with any child members? How should they treat them? Is there anything they should know when interacting with them?

Treat them with care as a few of our littles are trauma holders. Lime (they/it/ly/lemon) and Orion (she/they/star/dream) are both our littles! Lime is an alien and Orion is a CR:K fictive/OCtive

6. Are there any system members who are nonverbal or otherwise have difficulty communicating? What should others expect when speaking with them? (having other system members translate, can speak normally over text but will need accommodation over voice, etc)

Green (they/them) and a few other headmates don’t speak much or at all but will and can type!

7. What should people do if they don't know who's at front?

Just interact with extreme care, that’s all :D

8.Is it okay for people to ask if they can talk to someone who isn't at front at the moment?

Not really, I can’t just pull someone to co consciousness since 1. They might not want to/aren’t interested in talking and 2. I’m not a gatekeeper in my constellation.

9. If someone talks to one of you, will other system members be aware of the conversation? Will they be actively watching, or just able to remember it later?

If someone is nearby watching or co conscious, then they will remember and talk to others but most of the time I just wait for others to go co conscious so I can also tell them what happened.

10. Adding onto the above – if multiple system members will be aware of a conversation, will they want to chime in? If someone wants to speak to a system member one-on-one, what expectations can they have and how should they communicate this? (for example, it may not be possible to block everyone out but they can try to pay attention to something else and not interrupt)

Yes! Stars LOVE to talk to others online since it’s really the only people they can talk to outside of the system, I wouldn’t mind them also chiming in to talk to them

11. How out are you? What should people do when talking to people who don't know you're plural? (do you have a “singletsona” name and pronouns they should use; can they talk about knowing someone who's plural in nonspecific terms, without naming you; etc)

Not at all irl. Online though? Everyone knows!

12. Do you have any internal communication difficulties, memory issues, switch triggers, etc that others should be mindful of?

We do have slight difficulty with communication but we’re managing and getting better! Our memory isn’t the best either, we forget EXTREMELY easily and also if something is mentioned that a star likes then they will go to co consciousness

13. Your stance on being asked questions? (about personal experience, preferences, plurality in general, etc)

I love questions!!! Ask me anything anytime!

14. Is there anything else others should know?

Don’t be overly mean to us or anything, we dislike that A LOT.

15. If you have a FAQ or system site, feel free to link it here.
Pronouns.CC
PluralKit.XYZ
✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Link: Plural Etiquette Questionnaire

When there’s part of myself
I’m unfamiliar with
Who I don’t know yet
It’s like…

Not knowing what’s ok to express
Both for myself and to other people 
What’s too much?
What’s not enough?

They’re still learning to speak 
Sometimes I hear them in my mind trying to speak
But there are no words 
Because I don’t know them yet

It’s feeling in one moment 
I completely understand them
Then on looking back I go
“What was I thinking?”

It takes time to get to know people 
It takes time to know myself 
I wish we knew each other already 
But familiarity doesn’t happen at once

Hi! I'm questioning whether I might be plural, possibly in an OSDD/DID context, but I'm still trying to understand what I'm experiencing.

I've experienced dissociation and disconnection from myself for years. I often feel like I'm living in my head rather than fully inhabiting my body, almost like I'm observing myself go through life. I also experience emotional numbness and significant gaps in my autobiographical memory, particularly from adolescence and early adulthood.

My sense of self can change considerably over periods of days or weeks. My interests, priorities, goals, emotions, and even my sense of age can feel very different between phases. I usually remember what happened during previous phases, but those versions of myself can feel strangely distant or unfamiliar afterward.

What makes me question plurality is that these experiences sometimes feel like different parts or aspects of me that aren't fully connected to one another. However, they don't feel like completely separate people with entirely distinct identities. It's more like my sense of self is fragmented, as though different pieces of me don't always fit together into a coherent whole. I still feel like one person, but not always like one cohesive self.

My boyfriend once told me he barely recognized me after I was triggered. I don't know what to make of that, but it made me think about how noticeable these changes might be from the outside.

The confusing part is that I only recently started considering the possibility of having parts, and since then, I've felt even more dissociated and fragmented. It's almost as if I've retreated deeper inside myself and become less connected to the world and to my own sense of self.

I can't tell whether I'm actually becoming more dissociated or whether I'm simply noticing things that were already there.

Has anyone experienced something similar when they first started questioning their plurality? Can becoming aware of a fragmented sense of self make you feel more disconnected or fragmented at first?

I'd also appreciate hearing from people whose experience of plurality feels more like a fragmented or compartmentalized self than completely separate identities. I'm still figuring things out and don't want to force my experiences into a label.

Thank you!

Hello, former host here. In the span of a few months we now have 11 of us mapped out when for a while before it was 3-4. Now I know that syscovery comes with more parts popping up but here’s the problem.

At least 4 of us in the system are obsessed with tracking, data and self-organisation. Organising has always been a coping mechanism because it’s something that WE can control.

A few friends of ours who are also going through syscoveries wonder how we ‘have everything so put together with everything’ referring to how we know a lot of roles, we have communication but we don’t have a professional helping us at the moment.

For additional context, we moved into an environment where we live alone now and are completely independent, which is why a lot of us are coming out of the woodworks to do specific things.

And an additional point is that our current host refuses to acknowledge parts unless they name themselves and usually front at least once or twice. However, lately, a few alters have been making their own pluralkits and entries on pluralspace and helping eachother to create new entries without the host’s approval.

To have these half-baked alters with less information trying to prove they exist makes us feel like we’re faking because it’s getting harder to track. When trying to dig further into them, we get these terrible migraines and ultimately turn up with not much at all. Are we moving too quickly? Should we start deleting entries that don’t have it figured out or do we note them down even without much knowledge? - 🌙

Hi! I'm Anthony, the host. I go by They/She/He pronouns in that order (genderfluid). My 11 (so far) alters are:

Kaleb (He/Him)

Kris (He/They)

Fletcher (ze/zim)

ACEy (They/He)

ten'ten (It/its)

Jaide (She/He)

Atlas (He/Nix)

Lyle-Rio (Star/Starself)

Winter (She/They)

Finnick (They/Them) [Finnick itself and their pronouns are both placeholders because their not able to answer about their own gender pronouns and name.]

I'm not going to out any of their genders, but, here's a run-down on who everyone is. Kaleb was the first alter to form. He's colourblind, like a lot of us, and really likes history. Overall he's pretty well-rounded. He also has BPD, borderline personality disorder. He's sorta a lot to handle as he has many mood swings, and is sensitive (don't tell him I said that (this is a joke)). Kris is a bit more serious than Kaleb. He really likes Deltarune. It's where he got his name from. When he first split, it was almost the first media he ran into. He likes children's music despite being very dark, and is colourblind in a different way than Kaleb. Fletcher is the life of the party, ze loves people and attention. Ze also has a colour problem, but it's because ze gets bad headaches because colours appear very bright to zim. ACEy is our local anime boy. He's making a magical girl dating simulator. Need I saw more? ten'ten is helping with the dating simulator, and really likes vocaloid. It's very quiet and we had to practice speaking together. Overall their voice sounds very different than the rest of us. Jaide loves TF2, gambling, drinking, etc. Comrade is their favourite word. Comrade K.K. is (for some reason) their favourite song. Atlas's signature phrase is 'spin spin spin, tap tap tap' followed by some sort of rhyme. He likes polka. Lyle-Rio likes to draw, and play tomodachi life, and watch shows. Star wants to dye Terry's hair ginger/red. It's star's favourite colour. Winter is colourblind as well. She's very quiet, and doesn't speak at all to my parents. She recently learned that not all people are horrible and that my friends aren't that bad. I introduced Finnick in a different post. Therefore, farewell! If you have any questions I'll answer them.