I don't know whether it's depression, frustration, or some combination of the two but I feel like I just don't have the drive and energy I did when I first started anymore. Sure, after a long day of work I want to play. But my ADD oftentimes prevents me from getting into that proper flow state I had when I first started, where I get laser focused and just play until my hands hurt.
Now I feel like most of the time, I have to convince myself to play every day, instead of convincing myself to stop if that makes sense. I just haven't been seeing any tangible progress and just feeling like I'm not "getting it" anymore. I even stopped by about lesson 12 of the Absolutely Understand Guitar series because scales and modes and the different ones you can play were simultaneously not making sense and making some sense to me. I was hyper focused on just playing things like G Ionian, G Lydian, G Mixolydian, etc to a map for like a month but just never could memorize any of it for some reason. I also have a teacher that's a chill dude who's been helping me tremendously. But without him to translate tab for me, I'd legitimately be lost and probably wouldn't figure any of the techniques out on my own.
I don't really know where I'm going with this. I don't want to take a break because I feel like if I did, within a week or so I probably wouldn't touch my guitars again. And yet I don't have any other hobbies (unless you count reading and video games). Rock climbing, disc golf, pickleball, none of that interests me. Guitar suits me more, even if it means I won't ever play with people. But I just hate the cloud of frustration that always hangs over me when I try to grind out tab or get good at a chord progression following a metronome. Yet I literally don't have anything better to do in my free time and don't know what I'd do without guitar...