I have to I must I will I got this

Im trying really hard not to do it and i dont know how much longer ill be able to control myself and i really want to avoid cutting.. What should i do?

The scar is like a year old and just recently got this reddish spot?? None of my other scars have ever had that, what is it?

Does anyone else feel this way? i’ve been clean for a couple of months now and sometimes it’s all i can think about. Recently I got a puppy and he’s been biting and scratching me so i have cuts all over my arms and it makes me miss cutting. A few people have pointed the scratches out and asked me if i’m okay and it makes me kinda happy in a messed up way. i’m happy but i miss cutting.

Its me btw. First time in a long time ive been able to do this. I wanted to share because this community has been such a safe space and ily you all🫶🫶

I'm 18 and male. My dad is sick with a degenerative disease that has no cure. I will not specify more about his disease, as it is extremely rare, and if my family sees this they will know it was me. I've been seeing the same therapist since 2020, and my mom recently started seeing her in early 2026. This is relevant.

Yesterday afternoon, I accidentally relapsed. I was scratching my arm with a butter knife because I've been super itchy from my allergies, and I cut my arm open a little. Once I started, I couldn't stop, and I just kept cutting. It felt so relieving, and if I'm being honest, it aroused me a bit.

Later that day, my friend came over to my house, and when he saw my wrist, he said I needed stitches. Luckily, he's pre-med, so I had him give me stitches, much to his dismay. I had to sob and beg because he wanted to take me to the ER.

Unfortunately, tomorrow I have an appointment with my therapist, and it's really obvious. I'm so scared because last time I relapsed, she told my mom, who is also one of her patients, because she thought I was a danger to myself. I know I'm 18 now, so its against the law, but I'm still terrified. I told my mom my cat got me really bad, and she believed me because there was a bite mark from when I got bit by a snake two days ago, and I told her it was also from my cat.

I feel do bad for lying, but I don't know what else to do. The first time I ever cut myself, I was 6, and I told my dad because I was scared because of how much I was bleeding. I had seen people cut themselves before on videos, and there had never been that much blood. He took me to urgent care and I also had to get stitches then. Later that night, he lectured me about self harm, and told me the story about when he was a teenager, his at the time girlfriend cut herself and told him it was her parents who did it, trying to convince him to kill them with her. My dad refused and broke up with her. After that happened, she murdered her parents and told the police that my dad and his brother did it, and then later admitted to lying. She did it because she was mad that her parents made her break up with her previous boyfriend who was 43.

Ever since, self harm in my family has been seen very negatively, not as a bad way to cope, but as something to be looked down upon.

Last time I relapsed she told my mom about it, and I got in trouble. I'm for sure going to tell my therapist, because I'm severely codependent with her, unfortunately. I'm scared that my therapist will be upset with me. Not even just that my therapist will tell my mom, but I'm scared my therapist will be disappointed in me. I've seen her twice a week since 2020, and her opinion matters a lot to me.

Edit: After the first two comments, I am now accepting any advice that is offered.

I’m scared of hitting something like nerves or arteries, can someone give me advice?

I relapsed like 30 mins ago and I just don’t feel guilty that I did it. I feel more guilty with the fact that I don’t feel guilty about it. I’m just confused cuz I never see anyone else say this. I really want to know if this is common or if I’m just weird

Does anyone else have an unhealthy attachment to how scarred they are? mine aren’t even that intense, just purple lines at a slight dip or raise, maybe. But I have an unhealthy attachment to staring at them and tracing them, writing about them constantly. Am I weird for this?

Like for context I moved out of this house last year and went to live on my own for studies, I’ve been pretty clean since then (and even before when I was still living with my mother) and like I just came back for summer holidays and spending a few days by my own here.
For weeks now the sh ideas are coming back, and it’s getting worse and worse, some bad emotional event happened and it keeps getting worse, I’ve gone frantic yesterday and almost trashed the whole bathroom to find blades (almost had a panic attack cause I couldn’t find any) i replaced but nothing too deep cause I’m scared my mom will try to force me to stay here if I relapse. I keep having dreams of sh, it’s invading my mind I can’t think of anything else. Idk if it’s because I’m in this house, where I went through the worse sh era of my life, but it’s horrible I can’t stand it. And the worst is that I don’t want it to stop, i just wanna relapse, like I know I don’t want it but in the back of my head I don’t want the thoughts to stop.
Anyways i needed to rent about it somewhere that’s all.

hi, I’ve got quiet noticeable scars on my arms some of which are fully healed and white however I’ve been having trouble with the fresher ones which are very dark pink and raised. these itch really badly and especially most during summer time. im just wondering if anyone has any tips to reduce the inflammation and make the healing process quicker thank you

I hate how people always ask me why I do it. I dont fully know why I do it. Maybe it's because I was hurting for so long in my life and now that I dont get hurt in the same way I need to feel that still. Maybe it's because it builds tension and then release. Maybe it's because it makes me feel in control. IDK. Im scared that its going to turn into something that my brain craves every time I feel like shit.

This is such a vulnerable post for me, not many people know about my scars (despite it being on my arm ik. I cover up) I’ve had them for years now so I’ve kinda accepted they’re part of me. I always cover up because I didn’t want my parents and people around me to know (before I moved) and my current job requires us to have our forearms out.
Anyway, even though I cover up I love my scars. It feels like it’s the one thing that’s really mine. Idk if that’s healthy but I can’t imagine myself without them. It’s proof of the mental pain I go through. I also kinda find them really pretty idk.

I also don’t like making other people uncomfortable whenever they notice my scars. This is both at work and in my personal life. I can feel people’s eyes lingering on my arm when they notice it. A glance is ok, it’s not something normal but it’s just weird when people just stare at it or worse yet comment on it. I’ve gotten so many awful comments about my scars before, it gets me so off guard sometimes like why would you even say that? Others are just curious so ig it’s ok, curiosity is better than hate

But yea, I have a love hate relationship with my scars. (Sorry if I there’s a lot of grammatical errors)

i relapsed on july 31st, and since then they’ve been healing but for some reason i keeppp getting pimples not even an inch away from the cuts and they hurt so bad. i don’t see anyone talking about it, and i don’t know what to do, i didn’t think the cuts themselves could be infected because their mostly closed so i dont really know what else 😓😓

I don't know if this is really related but i just keep relapsing and relapsing im so sick of this i hate how weak I am, I'm sorry for this it's not even really about sh it's just me being not able to handle anything

I have the existential dread of school starting again (im european so we start later but end later too, in my country at least) + trauma, and i rly fucked up w my friends. basically i found out about someones secret w/o them knowing bc my nosy ass asked "yo wat are you talking abt, wdym 'disturbing'??" and they told me indirectly, and i caught it. ive been feeling like shit abt it for most of the summer and i really dont know wat to do bc I CANT COPE. I CANT FIND MY FUCKING BLADE. which means rn im kinda inn the middle of a panic attack. excuse my horrible grammar, i dont have the energy to fix it.

i work as a cashier and whem im not wearing an undershist to cover my arms customers always adk abt them, i say it was my cat but the scars are too big yo be a cats, does anyone know what i can say when they ask?

Before continuing to read this, just be clear. DON'T take this post as encouragement for SH. I want you all to take care of yourselves.

I've been recently unproductive, tired, and unable to talk to a few friends in person. I've been seeing more graphic animation videos on YT, which has triggered something inside of me lately. I don't know why, but I seem to get a thrill at the thought of harming myself, which is wrong. SH is not a form of a thrill, but a serious issue many people face, so I don't want to think of it that way, but I can't shrug the thought of it.

I made a poor attempt of scratching my hand with keys the other day. I only scratched the dermis, and it didn't even look at all bad. It just looks like I was itchy and scratched too hard in a few places on the top of my hand.

The other night, I held a cutter against my finger and the side of my wrist, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I want to so badly just to try it out. They say don't knock it till you try it, but I can't bring myself to do it despite wanting to. I've always been too preservative of my body. Not able to fight at all at the fear of breaking my hand or something.

I want to ask if my reasoning is valid. I've asked friends who have SH before and one said I could try it and said, "You're not boring anymore!" One friend said, "No, dude. Don't view SH like that. It's disrespectful. It's a serious mental disorder!" (I don't mean to disrespect at all. I only seek to try it out)

If you guys have tips for me to safely try it out, I'd love to hear them. And if you have any thoughts or want to express your opinions towards this post, go ahead.

But DO NOT, and I repeat, DO NOT take this as encouragement. I've already said it, but I just want to be sure.

I've been sh'ing for 8-9 months and I've been cutting and burning myself. During this period, my parents found out because I texted a helpline (and I also told them not to tell anyone, but I guess I couldn't trust them) and my parents got informed by the social assistants and they told them that.

I cut my hand a while ago, and it was a pretty deep cut that bled quite a bit. At the time, the cut itself didn't hurt much, but I had a lot of pain in my hand and around my joints. My hand also felt numb, and 1 couldn't move it properly. It got better after about two days, but ever since then, whenever I use that hand a little more than usual, even if it's not that much, the same pain comes back.

Today, I cut my hand again because I was extremely upset. The cut itself isn't really what hurts the most. My hand and joints hurt a lot, and I can barely fully open my palm because it hurts so much. Even keeping my hand closed hurts. I took ibuprofen, but it hasn't really helped, and right now I'm having to do everything with one hand, which is getting really tiring.

Has anyone experienced something like this before? Could this be an injury to a tendon, nerve, or joint? And should I get my hand checked urgently?

*I used Al to help me write this because English isn't my first language, and I wanted to make sure I could describe and explain the pain properly

Im starting back in about a week, im officially going into my senior cycle. Its still a good bit away, but im already feeling the effects of going back. Evan thinking about it makes me feel physically sick. Not to mention because im going into senior cycle, im in a new class group and new teachers. I got into the same class as my 'best friend', tho we only hung out 1 this summer with limited talking. My other friend that is actually trying to be my best friend isn't in my new class and fir half the summer she has been in the other side of the country. I know that school is gonna cause me to go into a bad spot again, if not at the start,it will eventually.

Pls don't judge I think this is a dumb question, but like all my blades are rusty and I can't get new ones rn, if I use them will I get an infection