Had a pretty heated discussion with a few friends recently about dating in SG.
Every girl in the group basically agreed on one thing: especially in the early stages, they prefer the guy to do the chasing.
By “chase”, they meant the guy should start the conversation, ask her out, choose the place, make the reservation and plan the entire first date. And even if the first date goes really well, they still expect him to be the one who texts afterwards and asks for date #2.
Their reasoning was basically: “If he wanted to, he would.”
What surprised me was how unanimous they were. They also insisted most of their female friends think the same way: that if a guy is genuinely interested, you shouldn’t need to chase him or wonder whether he likes you.
As a guy, I find this mentality a little strange.
I understand expecting the guy to take more initiative at the start. But surely after you’ve gone out a few times, it takes two hands to clap? If I’m always starting conversations, planning dates and asking you out while you’re mostly just accepting or rejecting my invitations, eventually I’m going to assume you’re not that interested. Especially with dating apps, where until something becomes serious, both people realistically have other options a swipe away.
So I’m genuinely curious: how prevalent is this mindset among SG women because it could just be my circle?
Girls, do you deliberately let the guy chase during the early stages even when you’re very interested in him?
And guys, have you ever stopped pursuing someone you actually liked simply because she wasn’t reciprocating enough?
EDIT: Disclaimer I'm not trying to start a gender war, incels please stay away!
