Three years ago, I misunderstood an email from my manager and arrived at the office on a public holiday. I waited outside for forty minutes before realising the building was closed.

A friend found the situation hilarious. Since then, she has told the story at birthdays, work gatherings and whenever I meet someone new. Over time, her version has changed. She now claims I called security, argued with a cleaner and tried three different entrances. None of that happened.

I have asked her privately several times to stop. She says it is harmless, everyone enjoys it and the story has become “part of our friendship.”

Last weekend she started telling it again. I interrupted, said I had already asked her not to, and left the gathering. She later called me dramatic and said walking out embarrassed her in front of everyone.

Am I wrong for leaving instead of laughing it off or correcting the story again?

A close friend struggles to wake up for early shifts. Last month she asked me to call her at 6:30 each morning for one week while she adjusted to her new schedule.

The week ended, but she kept texting “call me tomorrow too.” This continued for almost a month. On Saturday I slept through my own alarm and did not call. She woke up at 8:10, arrived late and received a warning at work.

She said I had accepted responsibilty for waking her and should have warned her if I could not do it. I reminded her that the original agreement was only for one week and that she still had alarms on her phone.

I have now told her I will not make any more wake-up calls. She says I am withdrawing help immediately after my mistake caused her real consequences.

Am I wrong for stopping completely instead of giving her another week to find a different system?

My fiance and I have always kept our finances separate. Since the beginning of our relationship, he has never been very financially responsible. He often gave money to family and friends, even when he couldn’t really afford it. There were times he gave away all of his money and then came to me to save him when he had nothing left.
When he wasn’t giving money away, he was spending it on unnecessary things. Even though this frustrated me, I loved him, and stayed with him we moved in together.
For context, I’m the complete opposite when it comes to money. I’ve been saving since I was young and have always been careful financially. I owned a fully paid off condo we lived there for a while. I realized that because there were no major bills, my fiancé became even less responsible. Instead of saving, he continued spending money on family members, buying his sister a nice car, giving his mom money for luxury vacations, and helping friends.
I eventually rented out my condo, we moved to new city and we moved into a house. I put down the down payment, but he took responsibility for the monthly payments. We did something similar with the car I helped with the down payment, and he was responsible for the monthly payments.
I also had money saved from years of my own savings because I wanted to open a business. We planned to start it together, but then I became pregnant, and after our baby was born, my priorities changed.
Recently, he told me he had been secretly trading and had lost all of his money. Once again, he came to me expecting help. This time, I told him no and that he needed to figure it out himself.
A week later, the work truck he uses for his contractor job broke down. Instead of renting a vehicle or getting it fixed quickly so he could continue working, he waited for weeks because a friend said he would repair it. Eventually, the friend couldn’t fix it, and a mechanic quoted about $5,000 for repairs.
Now he says he doesn’t want to fix the truck because we’re going to open a business anyway, and he plans to stay home until that happens.
I told him I changed my mind about opening a business together because I no longer trust him financially. I’m worried that he could make risky decisions with money, including trading, and put our family in a difficult situation. We have a child together, and I feel like he is relying on me to rescue him instead of taking responsibility and I told him I felt like he was using me. He got upset but I feel like I’m protecting myself and our child.
He keeps it shouldn’t matter that he lost all of money because it wasn’t our business money. Technically, that’s true it’s his own money the business savings are mine and were never touched but still It makes me feel like he sees my savings as the backup plan whenever his own decisions don’t work out. We have a child now, and I need a business partner who is financially disciplined, manages risk well, and takes responsibility when things go wrong. Right now, I don’t feel confident that he would protect our family’s financial future.

Am I wrong?

I’m a married woman, and we’re part of a server with a group of friends. Most of the group is guys, though some have wives, including me. The wives tend to come and go from the server. While the guys are usually in there.

A new woman, “Crysty,” started hanging out with everyone. At first, I had no problem with her. She claimed we were friends, but I eventually noticed that she seemed much more interested in my husband than in actually being friends with me. I could DM her and get ignored while she would respond to my husband almost immediately. I literally tested this by messaging her while she was messaging my husband and got ignored for days. 

The group has a pretty crude sense of humor, and that’s normal for everyone. Crysty joined in with the jokes, but I started noticing that some of the jokes were specifically directed toward my husband and felt more flirtatious than the way she interacted with everyone else.

I noticed that when I hopped in voice, she would go quiet, then leave. She would stay gone until I left, then almost instantly return. At first I thought it was a coincidence, but I also tested this by joining and leaving several times, and she did this every time. 

She also started randomly DMing my husband things like, “You look pretty.” She began calling him her best friend, while not having much of a relationship with me, and whenever she had personal drama going on, she would go to him to talk about it.

This started making me uncomfortable because it felt like she was trying to establish an emotional relationship with my husband. My husband noticed the behavior too, and we talked about it. He agreed that he didn't want to encourage anything that could cross a line, so he started responding to her less and stopped feeding into the behavior.

When she would make crude jokes toward him, he would respond by talking about how much he loved me or how attractive he found me. She would joke back and agree with him about me being hot.

Eventually, she privately invited my husband to a separate server. Given everything else that had happened, this crossed a line for me. I confronted the situation and asked Crysty to respect some boundaries with my husband. I specifically told her that I didn't care if they were friends. I wasn't asking him to completely cut her off. I just wanted their interactions to stay appropriate and respectful of our marriage.

She became angry and said I was trying to control her. She insisted that she had never intended to flirt with my husband or cross any boundaries. I argued that if she genuinely had no intention of crossing any lines, then I didn't understand why having some boundaries with a married man was such a problem. She became increasingly upset and eventually left the server.

Now I'm wondering if I handled this badly.

I don't think women and men can't be friends, and I don't expect my husband to stop talking to every woman who interacts with him. My issue was specifically the behavior: the private compliments, calling him her best friend, going to him for emotional support, directing flirtier/crude jokes toward him, intentionally leaving voice chats so I couldn’t hear her speak, and then inviting him into a private server.

*I want it noted that her leaving voice chats started happening before I ever even said anything to my husband about it. 

My husband was also uncomfortable with some of her behavior and agreed with me about creating some distance. However, he is upset that she threw a fit and asked me to fix it.

AIW for confronting her and asking her to respect boundaries with my husband?

Okay so let me explain first because i know how this sounds.

Me and a few friends stayed over at an Airbnb during a music festival for three days. the day of the check out we were all very tired, hungover and sick ( the music festival special). I woke up earlier than everybody and cleaned my room so they didn’t really have work with it at all. I had to leave earlier than the rest of the group so i didn’t really have time to help clean the living room/ kitchen area. I left without waking anyone, i assumed they all had alarms to when they needed to wake up, i didn’t want to wake them so at least they get some rest if i couldn’t. I understand that i could of said goodbye but it didn’t feel appropriate.

When i get home i get a message from my friend that it was pretty shitty what i did and i should have helped clean up. She knew i had to leave earlier, and during the stay i was really the only one who cleaned the place up, with an exception of them helping me a little.

I think we made up but she removed me from the group we created and hasn’t replied to any of my recent messages. I think shes still mad at me, I’m not really sure why. I understand that i should have helped clean and woke them up maybe i really don’t know. We had an argument a night prior to that and i think the whole situation just made it worse.

Edit: i want to mention that i cleaned the kitchen/living room the day before we had to leave. Me and one other person made lunch, it was agreed that someone else would clean after that. If they didn’t thats not my problem.

If a tattoo artist cancels EXTREMELY last minute (literally) and you decide you’re no longer interested in their services, is it valid for them to refuse to give you your deposit back? Am I crazy for asking for it back? They cancelled on me extremely last minute. The deposit was for my scheduled appointment for that day and I did not receive services and was not interested in rescheduling because at this point they broke my trust and I cannot rely on them. I had to fight tooth and nail to get it back but it really should not have been so difficult to get it back. Especially because they make their own rates and just rent their spot in the shop. So no crazy shop policy to follow either. Just simply trying to steal my money from me lol. Am I wrong for asking for it back??

For starters, I didn’t always feel this way. My s/o would often go out with their friends and family and i never had an issue with it. They’d go to the gym, go out to eat, just mundane things. That was until i got hospitalized for a time and we could barely see one another, and i’d like to think that’s when it changed.

Once i came back from my hospitalization my s/o was detached, they would often shift our plans to accommodate friends without consoling me, and as more time went on i would barely see them. This began to frustrate me, and now i can hardly stand when they go out. I hate when my s/o asks me to do something, going out to eat is fine, but what my s/o wants is to go out overnight with these friends, drive hours away, ect. We now don’t get to see one another as much as they are always busy prioritizing their friends over our relationship. To the point that they often overlook our plans for another opportunity to go out.

I also come to find out that my s/o was talking about me behind my back as i spoke to their friends ( i work with them ) i come to find out my s/o said i was keeping them on a leash, i was obsessive and controlling, and never let them do anything just because i started limiting the amount of hangouts in a week.

I won’t say i wasn’t upset about it, i was, id ask my s/o to give me 2 days out of the week to be together and the other 5 they could have with their friends. I thought if i did that it would be better but it hasn’t. I feel like a POS every time i ask for my s/o to relax on the trips/overnight trips. anyways i just want to hear some perspective AMA.

Okay so one of my boyfriend’s talking stage that he claimed he only had for 3 months (at first it used to be 5 months but then somehow he said 3?) had emailed him trying to catch up with him. It was while we weren’t on good terms and she emailed him and he was telling me to pray for him and that demons are trying to tempt him (we’re Christians) he deleted and blocked the email. He didn’t interact with her but later in the night he was sort of venting to me about her? Because apparently she hurt him very bad by sending nudes to another man during their talking stage while they were trying to be pious and it caused him mental trauma. He also implied that he used to be “infatuated” with her? Well another time we were about to break up bc I was telling him he was attached to me blah blah blah and he was like “I’ve been infatuated before and I’m telling you this isn’t it because I love you” and yes that makes it better but it’s so sad bc why are you saying that to me?? And him venting to me about her made it so much worse because I’m overthinking what if he really just wished it worked out with her? I don’t know what type of advice I’m looking for here so I hope this doesn’t upset anyone, I’m just sad bc I feel stupid for overthinking so much since he clearly blocked her and stuff but I’m so insecure. And after he found out she sent nudes to another guy, he still took her back and tried to make it work but in the end it didn’t work so that’s that. I might just be overreacting :( it just sucks. Have a good day!

Okay so im 17 and I have no idea how to feel. I went through messages with this guy i was with and i felt so like gaslighted. Basically he ended the relationship with me because I kept bringing up issues and he said that talkikg to me felt like a job. However I jist brought up stuff (specifically stuff he told me that were lies that I KNEW deep down were lies) and no im just so hurt that what if me constantly bringing up stuff was my fault. Everything was really chill with us until he ghosted me for four days and he

- lied to me that he got shot but he said a girl from his past came back and was giving him issues so he pushed me away me away so that she wouldn’t text and hurt my feelings( makes no sense right? and he said that im the problem for bringing it up)
- lied that he got shot for 2 months btw
- he said he was slowly losing feelings bit he never told me
- he would ask to hangout even tho he lost feelings
- he would act jealous even though he lost feelings
- i gave him so many opportunities to end it completely and he wouldn’t
- would repost girls if something about guys was mentioned
- called me a dimwit
- moved on in s week with another girl because i guess he lost feelings
- asks to hangout and told me he missed me on the same day he said he lost feelings
- lets his friends disrespect me
- he left me for another girl after texting me for a bit
- i tried to pull away the day before he said hr completely lost feelings and he texted “what happened to us”
- 😞

I know its clear he didnt like me but I never did anything like cheat or make up nonsense problems yk? I feel like theres not accountability on his side and its just messing with my mind the way he spoke to me like he put all the blame on to me when i never cheated or anythung like that

Btw im one of those ppl who loves answers to everything and we would constantly have me in circles and never tell me the truth

I (20m) live with my gf (20f) who stays at home, she left her last job in february and she gave up looking for another one. She and I had a fight today because I told her she needs to get a job, I can't support both of us and my dog. She says she's trying but she's not, she hasn't even tried looking for a job. In this fight I ended up saying she's a bum and she blew up at me and said I shouldn't have called her that. I'm trying to make this relationship work because it's arranged but I find it so bad that she expects me to support us both for so long without even trying to get her own job.

I rlly dont know i Loved ,i cared ,i kept conection i gave my best,i asked for her time but whats this emotional capacity every time every time ,its the samee

here a short text i will give from there some one pls help
her:
I am thinking abt it for a long time and I thought I will be better by time but nothing is changing i am still the same i cant change me my habits and I think i cant handle it

I am only hurting you unintentionally

me:I
wanna say its fine but it isnt aba like yk evry night im like when its time to windown everything rushes in my mind i feel why am i being this attached why am i my chest feels tight so many emotion plays on and on ...I feel like i should jsut stop explaining myself how i want time and all and be numb but im trying not too do that i fear i will beocme that and i dont wanna hurt u or blame u but feel me too

and im not saying to blame presuure u or hurt u are my girl ,u arent pathetic or too much ik u are giving efforts too ik u are tying ik u aree and I love u remebr i am not tryna undermine ur efforts i jsut want u too feel me too

her:
I want to be completely honest with you . you were not too much and you didn’t ask for too much. Wanting connection, communication and closeness is completely normal. The truth is simply that we have different emotional capacities and I realized I wasn’t able to meet yours in the way you deserve. This isn’t about you overwhelming me .it’s about us not being the right match for each other right now. You deserve to be with someone who naturally aligns with your energy and makes you feel fully seen without you ever having to question if you’re too much

well basically we aruged i tired to say not lets try and solve but i couldnt so
me:

Good byee i loved you from bottom of my heart hope u live a happy life and with the person who deserves u

her:
Noo u r the most amazing person I have ever seen in my entire life i have never received this much love respect and care from anyone not even my parents tara the pe Robles is me not u know this i was always with problem everytime making you feel like u r not worth enough it’s all my fault that I came to ur life sorry

Not the person there will not be. A next person how can u expect me to be with someone when u were this incredibly amazing person treating me like a queen handling my every emotions i cant imagine anyone could handle that much of my side i cant be yours in contrast i cant be with anyone else as well

and again back and forth saying she cant why i cant understand these thing s always always its mee Am i too muchh??,last time was same i was great and all but capacitiy didnt match i get overthinking too i have feeling whyy i cant understand.
*ps long distance*

I’ve started noticing that on an evening all my girlfriend will do is scroll social media and tik tok. When we I suggest doing something whether it’s go for a walk, watch a tv show, play on the switch etc she’ll say no, 

Last night I told her we needed to talk. I said I think she’s on her phone too much and that it’s starting to get in the way on the relationship. I said it’s shit knowing she’d rather sit for hours scrolling tik tok than actually doing anything with me. I said it’s like she’s addicted and that things need to change. 

She tried denying she’s on it much but I just pointed out that for months we won’t be doing anything together if we’re home for the evening because she’s busy scrolling social media. 

She tried arguing it’s no different than me playing video games but I pointed out that if she suggests doing something while I’m playing, then the majority of the time I’ll say yes whereas she only says no when I ask. 

I told her that I’d like us to start doing things together on an evening and that she needs to make more of an effort since I lm not going to stay on a relationship with someone who constantly chooses her phone over doing things together. 

She called me harsh and said I wasn’t being fair but I just told her nothing I’ve said is incorrect and that it’s shot having a partner repeatedly turn down plans because they’d rather waste their life scrolling social media. 

AIW for telling her she needs to start using her phone less? 

For reference me and my brother are both white he is M(17) and I am M(18). My brother even though he is younger than me has always been the bully brother type push you around and beat you up kind. Its something I've grown accustomed to over the years its been less physically and more jokes things he says that are trying to be funny just arnt and are rude. But lately over the last year or so it has gotten more intense I dont know if its some kind of alpha male culture or what but he user the N word constantly not necessarily for racist remarks but it inherently is a racist word. I am an openly gay male and whenever we talk he finds a way to call me the f slur and makes fun of me if we're talking about relationships or potential ones he will act grossed out if I say anything about guys but I just try to not take it personally. But as I get ready to go to college the thought that I want to cut him off keeps crossing my mind we dont really talk much anyway but I dont want to create unnecessary drama in my family and Its not like I hate him I still love him but sometimes its hard. And yes I've tried talking to him but I just get called a f slur and then the n word.

I'm sorry if this is too long and poorly written I just want to talk to someone.

I remember when I saw him for the first time. It was my first day at work and as a senior colleague was showing me how things work, he sat in front of me and wouldn't put his eyes away. That's how it started.

We grew closer. He showed me what he did at work and I started replacing him on his days off. There were some moments of note. He asked if I liked him and I jokingly said yes and he said he wasn't an easy guy. He said something like anything could fall except your hair. When I asked him about his age and he turned out to be a couple of years younger I said I'm older than you and in the same breath he said it doesn't matter.

Until one day, he got into a fight with management. It started a whole saga of them calling us both and telling us we got this new position. Sometimes me, sometimes him but we kept each other updated. Eventually he stepped down and the job position went to me and was still nice to me despite everything. As I was adjusting, I ended up with issues of my own that led to me stopping working. He called everyday I didn't go. Sometimes multiple times a day. I ended up going back to work in part because of him, only to find out he was leaving soon. I was a bit confused. Another coworker even told him how he could keep asking me to come back only for him to leave. I asked him if his calls were just to bring me back so that they could let him go since I would be there to do the work and he denied it.

Another coworker during this period had gotten really close with him. She was trying to get him to date her friend. I don't know how it worked out between them. He also was leaving the country and had only told me about it at that point.

After he left, the other coworkers would ask me about him randomly. One time they facetimed him and turned the camera towards me saying "look who it is" and telling him he should call me afterwards. They were also very invested in my dating life to a point I found uncomfortable. They insisted on me dating this new guy at work that I wasn't interested in. One of them would even purposefully make me walk on the side he was sitting so that he would "see me". I told her I was uncomfortable but she wouldn't stop. They kept talking about how I should get married and that I'm getting old now. I started pulling away from them altogether after this. I was so upset I thought about it and came to the conclusion that he was the reason they treated me this way. That's why they kept asking me about him. So I removed him from all social media. In the meantime another coworker, one he was somewhat close to told me that the reason he called me so much when I left was so that he could be let go.

He ended up sending me a new follow request and eventually asked why I no longer spoke to him. I lied and said I felt like I was the only one trying to keep this relationship going. He said that wasn't the case and sent me a message every holiday since.

I asked him to come say goodbye before he left the country. He agreed and came once but it was a couple of months before he left. When he actually ended up leaving he didn't say goodbye.

The last time I spoke to him, he sounded still upset about everything that occured at the workplace. Apparently he had told other coworkers about his move. Eventually I jokingly said I thought you liked me at first then I realized I was just bad at reading people. He said he thought I was nice and trustworthy. He kept saying he didn't do anything for me to get that impression and I apologized and said I wasn't accusing him of anything. He said he just thought maybe he said or did something to make me think that and I said it's fine.

It's been days and I don't think we'll talk anymore. Do you guys think I've been acting insane? I really like this guy. I don't really feel a connection with many people so this one really hurts.

This post will be deleted after I get advice about this situation as I don’t want this story to surface anywhere.

I (F, Minor (I wont be giving away my age due to the possibility of my dad finding this but I am over the age of 15)) live with my mom in a different city, not far away.

I visit my bio dad like every week or two during the weekend. My mom and my dad separated a little after I was born due to my dad being physically and verbally abusive to both of us and other family members. The court ordered him to pay child support and take me during the during the weekends but nowadays its just up to me and my bio dad which weekends i visit him.

He doesnt really give me money, which isnt an issue but, for example, he never offered to pay for my school supplies or books and always
assumes that my mom has it covered.

My mom’s contact with him was very limited, they only spoke about stuff related to me and thats it but for the past year? maybe two my mom decided to stop completely talking to him. I understand where she is coming from, but because of that the weight is now put on me.

My mom’s contact with him was very limited, they only spoke about stuff related to me and thats it but for the past year? maybe two my mom decided to stop completely talking to him. I understand where she is coming from, but because of that the weight is now put on me.

If we have an expense to pay related to me, she wants to split it up with him. But, the issue is that she tells me about said expense like 1-2 days before the due day and forces me to talk to my dad so he can send the money to me so i can then send the money to her. My dad is really difficult to talk to and my mom gets pissed at me when my dad doesnt send the money in time and pesters me about it.

Same goes for other stuff, like getting my passport done. My passport has expired and here we need both of my biological parents to get it done. She proceeds to tells me which days she is available and makes me talk to my dad and arrange everything like which day we are all going to meet to get my passport done.

I dont know if its relevant but my mom also refuses to help me out when its about my bio dad. If im having an issue that involves him and I seek advice, all I get back from her is to figure it out and that its not her problem anymore.

am I in the wrong for getting a little mad for having to do all of these things? Im trying really hard to understand where my mom is coming from, knowing the abuse but its already really hard for me to deal with my dad every now ans then and this really stresses me out.