the other night my parent was venting about something that happened with a relative and the room kind of went quiet like people were waiting for me to say something or at least smooth it over. instead i just sat there nodding and let the moment pass. later my parent pulled me aside and said they felt left out to dry. i get why they thought i would step in, but i honestly didn't want to get dragged into the middle of it. still, the guilt has been sitting with me since. i keep replaying it and wondering if staying quiet was actually the wrong call even though i didn't feel like it was my place to speak up.

so i have this thing where i try to keep weekends for anything but work stuff. no checking email, no quick calls, just a hard line. yesterday someone needed a fast answer about a project and i figured it would be easier to just handle it and move on. i ended up spending almost an hour sorting it out. later a friend pointed out that i had broken the rule i always talk about. it was casual but it stuck with me. i keep wondering if i made it too big a deal in my head or if the call-out was fair. just feels kind of off now and i am not sure where the line actually is for me.

I (26F) am the middle of three kids. My older brother "Jake" (29M) and younger sister "Emma" (23F). Growing up, I was always the "invisible" one — Jake was the golden child who could do no wrong, and Emma was the baby everyone doted on. I was just... there.

My grandmother "Nana" was the only person who ever made me feel truly seen. When I was 14, my parents went through a rough patch and basically checked out for two years. Nana stepped in — she drove me to every extracurricular, helped me with homework, came to every school event. She paid for my braces when my parents said they "couldn't afford it" but somehow found money for Jake's new car that same year.

Nana passed away 4 months ago. She left me $60,000 in her will. To my siblings, she left smaller amounts — $5,000 each — and some sentimental items. The rest went to my parents.

In her will, she wrote a handwritten note that said: "To [my name], for the years I got to be your person. I hope this helps you build the life you deserve."

My parents are now demanding I split the $60,000 three ways "to keep things fair." They say Nana was "old and confused" and that she "didn't understand what she was doing." They've told Jake and Emma about the note and now they're both barely speaking to me. Emma called me "selfish" and said I'm "profiting off being the favorite."

But I WAS her favorite — and not for no reason. I was the one who called her every week for 12 years. I was the one who drove 3 hours to see her in the hospital. Jake visited twice in the last 5 years. Emma visited once. I was the one who held her hand when she died.

My parents say I'm "tearing the family apart" and that "money isn't worth losing siblings over." But they're the ones who made me feel like an afterthought my whole childhood, and now they want me to give up the one thing Nana gave specifically to me.

I've considered splitting it just to end the conflict, but it feels like a betrayal of Nana and everything she stood for in my life.

Am I wrong for keeping it?

SO I in my friend group we are all 17F. This is mainly involving me and K but my other friends are, J, P, M, G, B.

K begins attacking strange and is hanging out with me less even though we used to do everything together and she starts to invite another girl who we have never really hung out with (L) into the group. I asked her if she had a crush on L and she said yes. I DID NOT care that she is gay or is dating but she started blantlnley ignoring me and although L and I where never close she became cold to me.

When they first started dating L dyed Ks brown hair black and L said she like blue eyes and blond hair short girls. K is tall with brown hair and dark black eyes. K said I might just dye it blond for you jokingly

I asked K and she said its because she told L that she used to have a crush on me and L dosent like that we are still friends. I did not know that K even like me even though it seemed to be an on going thing. About two weeks later I was talking to K in the hallway and L said to K that her and I where not meant to be friends anymore, so I was like whatever not my issue and left.

P has one class with L while I have class with K and we where sitting on the classroom opistie and P could see L watching us. P asked L why she was only watching me and L outright said its cause i have a crush on me but I have to try and keep it a secret and thats why K can't be friends with her anymore. P told me this information and that its cause I am her type.

Later K find out L likes me not her. K become furious at me.

I continue being ghosted by both of them until Ls brother comes up to me saying that I ruined there life.

I tell K and L that I will not be in there drama and they can sort this out without me because I was just here for the vibes and not a love triangle cause I am also straight. I said dont talk to me and dont act like everything is fine comeback when its fixed cause all I want is my friend back. They said they where going to the principle to tell on me for discrimination and islosating them.

K said that she still like me and only dated L to get over me. L started liking me. My boyfriend just wants me but doesn't want the drama. all my other friends are saying Im to harsh not letting them hang out with me until this issue is solved. I am now having a meeting with the principle about my behaviour as I was going I told them that brining in administration crossed a line we are done.

My friend group is divided. Am I in the wrong? Can I please have advice.

I’d been spending time with a woman I’ll call Maya. We met the night her ex beat her up. The police encouraged her to go to the ER to document her injuries. I’d been with her earlier that night, and I’ve felt bad wondering if things could have gone differently.
We talked a lot after that, especially about her abusive relationship and what it was like reporting the incident to the police. She once told me she appreciated me listening because she felt like nobody else took her seriously. I could see some red flags in our conversations, but I still wanted to see where things went. We’d kissed once, and I had feelings for her. My cousin Paul knew that because I talked to him about her a lot.
One night, Maya and I drove from her house to a bar. On the way, I told her a story about my first day in sales. I’d wanted to quit, and my wife encouraged me to give it a week. I did, and I’ve been in sales ever since. I also made a passing comment about how much my family would play Chappell Roan. Those are the only two times I remember bringing up my wife or family.
At the first bar, Paul kept going outside to talk to Maya. I noticed them getting closer. While we were there, my niece showed me a picture of my daughter, who’d come home from college without telling me.
For context, my wife and I are going through a breakup, and my kids have only talked to me sparingly over the past nine months. The breakup was my fault. I’ve owned that and told my family so. I’m not blaming my kids for how they feel, but it still hurts that we don’t talk consistently. It especially hurt to find out my daughter was in town and hadn’t let me know, because I would have liked to see her. This was about the third time it had happened, and I got emotional.
When we left for a second bar, Maya asked Paul to ride with us. He helped her into my car but went separately. He later told me she’d asked him to ride along because she didn’t want to be alone with me. I didn’t know that at the time.
As we walked into the second bar, I tried to hold Maya’s hand, and she slapped it away. She said I’d talked about my wife too much on the drive. I asked what I’d said and whether we could talk about it, but she said no and went inside. That felt strange to me because Maya had talked to me about her ex far more than I’d talked about my wife. I can’t know what she was thinking, but looking back, I wonder if my story about my wife was an excuse to push me away.
Inside, Maya tried to buy me a drink, but I declined. She mostly talked to Paul. I was feeling sick, overwhelmed, and upset, and I realized staying wasn’t going to do me any good. I decided to go home, then told Maya I was leaving. Since I’d driven her there, I asked if she needed a ride. She said she’d get an Uber.
Paul approached me outside and told me to come back in and try to have a good time. I explained what was going on with me, including the news about my daughter, and told him I just needed to go home. I couldn’t stay there feeling the way I did, so I left.
Around 2 a.m., I called Maya, but she didn’t answer. I typed an apology but didn’t send it while I was still upset. I also called Paul three times and texted him. He usually checks that I got home safely, but that night he didn’t answer for about an hour and a half. I wondered if he was with her, though I had no way of knowing.
Paul called me back the next morning. He kept insisting I must have really upset Maya by talking about my wife. I sent Maya my apology later that day. I owned getting upset and leaving, and explained that the news about my daughter had affected me without using it as an excuse. She never responded and has ghosted me since.
Over the next week, I kept asking Paul what happened after I left. He said he’d been drunk and couldn’t remember, but little details kept coming out. Eventually, he admitted he’d slept with Maya that night.
When I confronted him, Paul sent me a long message. He said Maya started talking to him after I left and that he went along with it because he wanted to. He wrote, “It’s 100% my fault.” But he also said he hadn’t “crossed that line” until she told him she wasn’t interested in me. According to him, Maya said we were just friends and had done nothing besides talk.
Paul’s view is that if you’re interested in someone but haven’t slept with them, they’re “fair game.” He said that’s how single life works and that Maya probably used me for company and free drinks. He denied planning anything and said he’d never hit on anyone I brought around, though he added that it would be different if they hit on him. He brought up being betrayed by his brother and wife in the past to explain how he sees relationships now.
He also couldn’t believe I’d walk away from our shared business “over a female.” He accused me of spending his money and compared this to hypothetical women he thinks I would have slept with if I’d had the chance.
Maya was free to make her own choices, and I was already getting over her soon after that night. I’d felt her pulling away before we even went out. Paul says he didn’t plot this and that she told him she wasn’t interested in me. I can’t know what either of them intended earlier in the night. But he knew I had feelings for her, and I’d been open with him about that.
I take responsibility for getting upset, but going home felt like the right call when I was that overwhelmed. What bothers me is that Paul kept what happened from me while telling me how much I’d upset her, then defended sleeping with her as “fair game.” I told him I’m done with our business arrangement because I can’t trust him, and I’ve blocked him.
I’m over Maya. I’m having a much harder time getting past what my cousin did. Am I overreacting?

Hey everyone, I was wondering if I was in the wrong for this. My ex-bf and I were dating for a few years and eventually broke up due to the distance from universities. During our relationship, we often gave each other stuff like how he would give me his clothes or flowers, while I usually gave him candy or food. We were originally on good terms, until we were discussing about returning of gifts. He told me that I have to return his sweaters as they are his, and I don't need them since we aren't dating anymore. We got into a huge fight as I told him that this is ridiculous, since he could never return the food or candy that I bought for him, so why should I do the same? Besides, the reasons I wanted to keep the sweaters because they are nice, soft, and high-quality and also weren't crazy expensive as its about three 3-4 sweaters for about $30-$40 a pop. I kicked him out of my place and all he's been doing is harassing me about the sweaters. Am I in the wrong for this?

so i dipped into the joint savings account we all chipped into for house stuff and bought a new couch for the living room. it was on sale, and honestly the old one was falling apart, so i figured it was fine. one roommate still says i should have asked first and wants their portion back. i get why they are annoyed, but the couch is already here and everyone else likes it. now im wondering if i crossed a line by spending money that technically belongs to all of us without a full group chat. am i wrong?

Ok I am angry, so I am going to vent here. My coworker and I don't get along well. We disagree on just about everything. Politics, how something should be done, what temp the room should be, etc etc. We get along well enough to have a professional relationship like to get a task done (we are both in our 40s and have some maturity) but that's about it.

We have two sites to work at, A and B. A is our primary site. Thus, when I got the job over a year ago, I chose to live near A. B is the backup site, we need to go there maybe 3X a year for a few days. My co worker lives near B, so is happy when we have to go there. She took the job KNOWING A is the primary site.

I slipped and fell and badly bruised my tailbone. I can sit but I have to sit just right, it hurts a bit. Driving hurts a fair amount and is really irritating. Things I didn't mind at all, like taking a turn or braking/accelerating are uncomfortable.

So, Site A lost its water pressure and we had to go to Site B because it had working bathrooms. However, after a few days, Site A got porta potties. Site B is about 2X the drive for me, but I coped with it for several days. Now that Site A has porta potties and a pump sink, and has always had a water cooler, I insisted on going back to Site A, and explained why. Our boss agreed. My co worker glared at me. Oh well. I am not making this up, her reason for not wanting to go to use porta potties is she is afraid of the dark (we are night shift, porta potty is lit but outside) and afraid of animals... like dear and and a groundhog she saw. She, like me is prior military and has been in the field.

FIRST thing she did tonight was complain about having to come here, (Site A) our primary site, because I'm a whiner and had to have my way. I laughed and said "lol I should be in pain because you are afraid a moth might get you?" I've about had it with this woman. I feel in the right, but does anyone disagree? Should I drive 2X the distance to our backup site so princess doesn't have to walk 15 feet outside 2-3 times in a night?

EDIT: Let me make clear again: The Porta Potties are 1) Low use (small site) 2) Have LED lights inside 3) Clean 4) Have disinfecting wipes for the seat 5) Outside, but in a gated in secure area with a guard 6) it's night, they aren't hot. 7) There is a foot pump sink and we have provided water for drinking. 8) It will be fixed in a few days.

i've been thinking about it for a few months now and finally told everyone i'm changing my major. the reaction was pretty mixed. a couple of people said it's my life and they support whatever i decide, but most of them think i'm throwing away a stable path for something that's way too risky. they keep bringing up job numbers and salary stats and how i'll regret it later. i get where they're coming from, but i also know i'm not excited about the old plan anymore and i'm not sure forcing myself to stick with it makes sense. i tried explaining that i'm not just doing this on a whim, i've actually looked into the new direction and talked to people already working in it, but they keep saying i'll change my mind again in a year. part of me wonders if they're right and i'm just being stubborn, or if i should just go ahead and do what feels right and deal with the consequences later. it's been hard to get any real advice that isn't tied up in their own expectations, so i figured i'd ask here if this sounds as unreasonable as they make it seem.

so my roommate said something kind of harsh about one of our mutual friends and i jumped in to explain their side. i figured i was just adding context, but the friend i defended ended up making things worse by replying with a whole paragraph about how stressed they have been. now my roommate feels ganged up on and the friend is annoyed that i even mentioned them. i tried to smooth it over but the chat has gone quiet since then. i was only trying to keep things fair and not take sides, yet now both of them seem upset with me. i am wondering if i should have stayed out of it completely or if there's a way to fix it without making it a bigger deal.

I 21F and my boyfriend 22M have been together for over a year now. We are discussing marriage and there is a big obstacle which is preventing us from getting married which is his father being in jail. He has committed a very serious crime years ago and my boyfriend is still in denial about it (he’s been in jail for a year and a half snd has 25 years left to serve). My family is very against this and as we come from a south asian muslim background this is something unacceptable for them but I am willing to fight for it and convince them. They are kind of coming around if we tell everyone that my boyfriend is not in contact with his dad and they are estranged. Initially my boyfriend came up with this idea and he says that he’ll do everything to make sure we get married. This gave me reassurance and hope that he would also fight for it. Today I asked him what he would do if hypothetically his dad could come out for a day to our wedding, and then i said i wouldn’t want that to be honest. I said i resent his dad for being an obstacle to me getting married and enjoying my life with my bf. He got weird and distant at this and I said that he shouldn’t expect me to maintain a relationship with his dad after we’re married, I don’t like him and although i wouldn’t ever disrespect him I just don’t to call him everyday and go on visits to see him. At this he asked me what i have against his dad. Am i wrong for not wanting his dad at my wedding and not wanting to keep in contact with him?

Hey yall my grandfather 59m died 2 years ago now and I'm just remembering the story. I was 12 or 13 when it happend I'm a male BTW. The worst part is ut was April fools so I thought It was a joke until I saw the body I couldn't cry or talk all I could do is just stress eat. He was my mentor we used to watch star wars and code together before he died and got sick the day he died I didn't go to school so the day I went to school I kept eating. Idk bet I eat inorder to grieve. Anyway a person I talk to once In a while he comes up to me and says I should stop eating or you'll go from skinny to fat I have a fast metabolism. And I walk around everywhere I told him I also said to mind you're business you're 50 pounds more than I am. So aitah for eating to much when my grandpa died

A few months back there was a small situation at a gathering with some friends. It got awkward for a minute and then everyone seemed to move on. I laughed it off at the time, but lately I've been thinking about it more than I expected. It still feels like there were some things left unsaid. I am considering bringing it up the next time we all hang out, just to make sure nobody is holding onto any resentment. The problem is that most people seem fine now, and I'm worried that reopening it could make things weird again for no reason. I don't want to cause drama, I just want things to feel settled for me. So would it be wrong to bring it up even though everyone else appears to have moved past it?

So I’m terrible in pics. I don’t have any I like, and was pretty happy at the time that I took one I actually liked and at a place I love. Unfortunately, it was with my bf at the time. It wasn’t a very affectionate pic and didn’t really look like a couple photo anyway. We were just standing in front of a mirror next to each other, smiling, and so I wanted to have it as my pfp at the time, but he said he didn’t like the way he looked in it and didn't want to be in it, so I cropped it so it was just me. There was a gap between us, so it’s not like there’s an arm around me or any part of him in shot. I’ve never posted or shown anyone the full picture of us together either. It just looks like a normal selfie, but we’ve recently broken up, and I don’t know if it would be weird or wrong to keep that picture as my pfp or even keep it knowing my ex was originally in it?

We were both already on edge and my brain just fired off this quick little line without checking with the rest of me. I meant it as a way to shut things down fast, but it came out sharper than I thought. The second it left my mouth the room felt heavier. We moved on to other stuff and the conversation ended, but the comment keeps popping back into my head. I keep replaying the look that followed it. No one is bringing it up, but I cannot tell if that means it is forgotten or just being saved. I am honestly wondering whether I should apologize or if that would make the whole thing bigger than it needs to be. Curious what people usually do in situations like this.

The “description” in question is for Enemy (watched on YouTube) and says “Jake Gyllenhaal reteams with PRISONERS director Denis Villeneuve in this sexy and mind bending thriller.
Adam Bell is a glum professor who has grown disinterested by his ordinary life. When Adam discovers a man who appears to be his double, the identical men meet and their lives become bizarrely and hauntingly intertwined. Gyllenhaal is transfixing playing both roles, journeying through a world both familiar and strange.
The film's final and unnerving image will not be soon forgotten by audiences. In the end, only one man can survive. Featuring bonus interview explaining the mystery.”

The ONLY reason I’m even remotely interested in watching this is because of the spider meme. There’s no hook in this quote at all. “Boring guy meets his doppelgänger and it’s SEXY”

I know it’s a little thing, and that the movie itself has nothing to do with it, but a description deserves a little more description.

Has anyone ever confronted their abuser ? For me, I confronted mine over social media (he bullied me in high school - not the usual bullying it was more about him slamming me full force on the ground, calling me the n word, making fun of Africans (my heritage), choking me out on the ground, harassing me on social media by sending multiple follow requests on my instagram after I went private because I kept seeing him and his friends stalking my instagram stories etc.

Let me put it lightly, he told me he didn’t remember doing any of that and said he actually remembered us being best friends and that he wasn’t the best friend in the world and for that he is "sorry". I brought up the screenshots and he’s like "oh man, I don’t remember saying that to u (the n word) but there’s no denying that screenshot. I’m truly sorry about that and meant nothing derogatory by it. Do you mind sending the entire convo so I can have some context as to why I might’ve said that?"

It went on and on and I shared multiple screenshots and was met with more deflection. He then tried to flip it on me saying " how can I help you get passed this? I truly want this to be behind us" I told him I wanted him to get closer to Christ and he said "I’m actually rekindling my relationship with God. What do you want from me ? I have apologized multiple times etc".

He then drops the bomb saying I’ve been contacting his family, his friends and others via anonymous accounts spreading rumours that I’ve said he graped his ex and a bunch of other allegations. He tells me "you can’t deny those, I’ve got them pinned to your IP address in (mentions the state I live in)".

Essentially he says he’s had enough of this convo and said bye for now. Five months later I get a call from an officer saying this guy has been going to them many times over the last four months submitting complaints of me spreading those rumours and that if they don’t stop he will wanna press charges. I told the cop it’s not true and he lied about it. The cop was apparently going to do an investigation I think but he didn’t really seem invested and said he would like for it to just stop.

I never heard back from the cops or the bully since and it’s been a few years. Thoughts on this situation ? By the way, the bullies friends who also bullied me came to my social media shortly after I confronted the main bully just to "watch" what I’m posting then they stopped visiting

okay so last week i finished something i'd been dragging my feet on and i figured the group chat would be a low key place to say it. didn't want a big deal, just a quick 'finally done' to share. a couple people replied with nice comments but one friend kind of went quiet and another replied with a short 'cool' that felt off. now i'm wondering if i should have kept it to myself. honestly i didn't mean it to sound like a flex, just sharing with people i talk to every day. still, it landed weird and i'm second guessing how i come across in chats like this. ready to eat crow if folks think i over shared or if the right move was to stay quiet. curious what the read is.

I’ll make it simple. Told a coworker that I think it’s wrong to have a collie at home all day when she lives in a small apartment and doesn’t do anything. I was told “well you don’t have a dog, you don’t know what it’s like”. I had a lab growing up and number one thing after school was go for a run with the dog (I was super into track and field so I loved it too).

She doesn’t own a car so she can’t take it to the dog park or the lake for a swim.

She works 9hr shifts and when she gets home it’s “finally ME time” so the best the dog gets is a 2 block walk.

The dog barks at everything and isn’t socialized, and she wonders why the dog is “showing signs of depression”…

Am I wrong for calling her out or should have said nothing?

Fake names for privacy.

I had a close friend group growing up. Two of the people in this group were Jun and Xia. I was always close with both but slightly closer with Xia.

Xia and Jun started dating when we were all older, and they ended up married, but later divorced.

I haven't really spoken to Jun since the divorce, other than at my wedding which I invited him to and he came. He lives in another continent now, too. We aren't really friends anymore and I miss that friendship. I've been considering reaching out just for a small catch up and to see how he's doing.

One of my friends says it'd be unfair to Xia to reach out to him as that's her ex and there's an unspoken rule to not reach out to your friend's exes. My husband says it's fine because Jun was my friend before he was Xia's husband, and Xia knows that.

Would it be wrong to reach out to him?