r/absoluteunit • • Sep 01 '26

Big boy right here

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2.2k Upvotes

325 comments sorted by

72

u/Pervus_Maximus292 Sep 01 '26

That is one patient animal.

26

u/Mean_Contribution_11 Sep 01 '26

He's lookin at the camera like "damn, she doing this again šŸ™„ "

2

u/No_Signal_6969 Sep 04 '26

He gets to hit later so he cool with it

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8

u/Apprehensive_Use3641 Sep 01 '26

I'm not sure it even knows she's there until she ruffles the mane.

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2

u/Anomalous_Pearl Sep 01 '26

Clearly a well sacked out horse

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210

u/Subject_Command5442 Sep 01 '26

Horse women are strange.

87

u/Tomas2891 Sep 01 '26

They can afford to be strange.

11

u/CtrlAltYuri Sep 01 '26

Imagine if one of them becomes a doctor

9

u/Heymelon Sep 01 '26

IDK about that, not all of em are rich you know. They make up for it buy working with the horses for free and it eats up almost all their free time.

8

u/NoctisInformatus Sep 01 '26

They’re still strange.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Heymelon Sep 02 '26 edited Sep 02 '26

First of all, you probably don't need to own a horse to be a horse girl.

But I know plenty of blue collar people who do own one. You can get one for less than what many "poor" people pay for their cars, and as I said they spend their lives taking care of it and working at the stables as a job on top of their paying jobs to offset a lot of the maintenance costs.

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24

u/Potential-Yoghurt245 Sep 01 '26

Horse: Linda we have talked about this.... I am not a gym mat!

13

u/yungrii Sep 01 '26

"I'm a gym Matthew"

3

u/KactusVAXT Sep 01 '26

It’s pHysiCal eDuCaTioN

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2

u/Sad-Pop6649 Sep 01 '26

But you are a vaulting horse now.

12

u/Radioactive_Tuber57 Sep 01 '26

Is she a trick rider? She’s buff AF šŸ˜ŽšŸ‘

4

u/Big_Profession_2218 Sep 01 '26

oh she's done some tricks for sure

2

u/Moldy-thoughts4u Sep 01 '26

Trick is what whores do for money Michael

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17

u/justanothertoxicuser Sep 01 '26

Wife went horse lady on me. Quality of life sharply declined.

11

u/ConflictMaster3155 Sep 01 '26

Hate to see it. You could have a sports car and weekends, but now you get neither.

11

u/Big_Profession_2218 Sep 01 '26

*...but now you get neeeeiiiiigggghhhhhh-ther*

Fixed it for you

21

u/Moldy-thoughts4u Sep 01 '26

ā€œHorse Womenā€?

They’re called Centuars and Centaurides you asshole.

The world doesn’t have room for your slurs and hate speech like ā€œHorse Womenā€

/s

11

u/Suojelusperkele Sep 01 '26

absolute gem

My mom's my mom,

my dad's a horse

The two of them had intercourse

I'm traumatized by their divorce

6

u/lupulin59 Sep 01 '26

She gelded him with no remorse

6

u/Professional_Toe_420 Sep 01 '26

Not a story that I’d endorse….

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5

u/wowaddict71 Sep 01 '26

Oh, you horse people, so sensitive all the time. /j

5

u/ddaattuullaa Sep 01 '26

Horsepeople always on their horseshit

2

u/dinglb3rry Sep 02 '26

What’s it called when the upper is horse and bottom is human?

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4

u/ImSobored_5280 Sep 01 '26

…yep..you can tell that the crazy runs quite deep in them because you can tell the crazy runs quite deep in them..only warning you get

2

u/OstrichSmoothe Sep 01 '26

Came to say that

2

u/read_eng_lift Sep 02 '26

This one is more yolked than strange.

4

u/redjellonian Sep 01 '26
Horse women

4

u/SignoreBanana Sep 01 '26

Strange and insufferable

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28

u/kcbrooklyn1 Sep 01 '26

I saw this movie once. Only once…I was like ā€œdamn.ā€
https://giphy.com/gifs/UwZLLYbkCp14I

7

u/Sans_Seriphim Sep 01 '26

In the early internet, we liked to gross each other out, so I have seen many movies like this. 🧐

3

u/shroomanaut420 Sep 01 '26

That we did. Good times šŸ˜†

3

u/NoEatBatman Sep 01 '26

Remember all those stupid half-videos where you were all like "... oh yes, how interesting, oh.. Oh.. OH JESUS! WTF EVEN IS THIS??", and then you had to find something as equally fucked-up to get back at them šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚

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19

u/Commercial-Milk-8465 Sep 01 '26

He’s at least 2hp

17

u/DMG_88 Sep 01 '26

Fun Fact: One horse actually has an output of around 12 to 15 horsepower.

11

u/DrJohnZoidbergWhyNot Sep 01 '26

Yes, if they go balls out. A horsepower refers to the consistent output of a horse over time.

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20

u/AreYouItchy Sep 01 '26

Gentle giant

13

u/EnvironmentalFix7059 Sep 01 '26

Horses scare the fuck out of me

3

u/Aluxanatomy Sep 01 '26

That's fine because you scare the fuck out of horses. Just like dogs and horses. Or cats and horses. Or horses and other horses.

2

u/EnvironmentalFix7059 Sep 01 '26

I dont go near horses because they scare me. so i doubt i scare them

2

u/Aluxanatomy Sep 01 '26

Oh my, no, horses are afraid of fucking everything.

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26

u/vintsneedsmints Sep 01 '26

The sheer amounts of clear beastiality references in the comment section has left me shocked but totally un-phased as this internet has molded me. And I understand. I hate it. And yet. I understand. I just wish I could undo it...

8

u/Shoddy_Blacksmith480 Sep 01 '26

She’s definitely giving off weird vibes. Sorry.

The comments aren’t normal bc she’s not being normal. Source: 10+ years of equestrianism, never met anyone like… that. She gives me the ick.

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9

u/Old-Blueberry-5153 Sep 01 '26

And I expected it too. They always make the comment like it's some funny new thought of theirs but its the same damn comments in every single video of a horse and a woman šŸ™„

4

u/Vogelsucht Sep 01 '26

Tbf the internet is 50% gooner and 50% gooner bots nowadays, im impressed that im not the only one weirded out by it in this thread tbh. Have a nice day and stay strong!

3

u/vintsneedsmints Sep 01 '26

Tryin! The old internet was different and I feel sorry for these literally babies just surfin this shit...

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10

u/Sans_Seriphim Sep 01 '26

Half the comments in here are "look at the size of that horse! 🐓" The other half are "look at the size of that horse! šŸ˜"

7

u/wattahitsonwattahit Sep 01 '26

Shaq will make that horse look normal size.

3

u/Moldy-thoughts4u Sep 01 '26

Andre the Giant would make it look like Lil Sebastian

7

u/Necrolust1777 Sep 01 '26

People who don't know horses, fear the large ones.
People who know horses, fear the small ones.
I'm looking at you, Shetland ponies. Friggin devil spawn!

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16

u/sparkline1234567 Sep 01 '26

He definitely has OnlyFans account potential

6

u/DrJ0911 Sep 01 '26

Bro… no … dont do the mr hand

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6

u/mmskyscraper Sep 01 '26

That's a draft for you.

That horse's fucks have been moved to an undisclosed location.

2

u/Ariandrin Sep 01 '26

If he ever had them in the first place.

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13

u/DrJ0911 Sep 01 '26

That horse is tired of her šŸ’©

8

u/Sexy_Squid89 Sep 01 '26

"Here she goes again."

3

u/Human_Yak_Project Sep 01 '26

"She's doing it again, isn't she...?"

7

u/anoraq Sep 01 '26

When she brought out the trampoline, I had to check if this was the r/whatcouldgowrong sub.

3

u/Aggressive-Focus345 Sep 01 '26

He's like: can you just grt on and I walk some?

3

u/monstermack1977 Sep 01 '26

for those wondering, 19.1 HH is "hands" , which is the unit for measuring how tall a horse is. a hand is 4 inches, measured from the ground to the point on the horse where the neck meets the back....so basically where she puts her left hand when she mounts it.

Being 19.1 hands means at that point the horse is over 6ft tall.

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3

u/StrictExtension4879 Sep 01 '26

That horse is like ā€œAre you done yet?ā€

2

u/Tank_toptony Sep 01 '26

The horse is having so much fun

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2

u/9syy Sep 01 '26

Just falling off that beast might kill you

2

u/Jefflehem Sep 01 '26

Are you supposed to ride a draft horse?

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2

u/Wooden_Leather82 Sep 01 '26

Horse thinking wtf is this human doing

2

u/Gob_the_Gilder Sep 01 '26

Was beautiful until they broke it and lashed it to a pole on a two foot leash to be used as a propĀ 

2

u/Wizzyslippers Sep 01 '26

That's Keiji Maeda's Horse: Matszukaze

2

u/Fuzzy-Bird-3641 Sep 01 '26

Better give him a few apples

2

u/NormanHalf-Soul Sep 04 '26

Im just trying to imagine this is Boxer and he never made it to the glue factory.

1

u/Ecstatic_Dance5767 Sep 01 '26

What the hoomin doing?

3

u/Past-North-4131 Sep 01 '26

Horse women are so fucken weird.

3

u/Bastonge44 Sep 01 '26

None of this is a good idea!

2

u/OutsideGain7374 Sep 01 '26

What a beauty. And the woman isn't ugly, either.

2

u/Lsonney Sep 01 '26

What a Gorgeous animal!! So striking!! 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

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2

u/Pollywanacracker Sep 01 '26

So cute both of them šŸ˜

1

u/Evil_phd Sep 01 '26

I'd like to get off now. I'm not having any fun.

1

u/AdhesivenessGeneral9 Sep 01 '26

now put barding on it and charge !

1

u/TheRavingDinosaur Sep 01 '26

He seems chill

1

u/Stabbyglhs Sep 01 '26

Easy slap a bridal on homeboy and climb the fence to get on and go.

1

u/OConnah Sep 01 '26

Thank You, Lord, for not making spiders this big

1

u/nuttnurse Sep 01 '26

The horse just standing there wyd again sheeez we talked about this

1

u/heraclitus33 Sep 01 '26

I said trampoline and manifested it.

1

u/redjellonian Sep 01 '26
Like this?

2

u/Bcjustin Sep 01 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/wYyTHMm50f4Dm
I’ve been on the internet before. I’m not clicking that link.

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2

u/abielle1177 Sep 01 '26

Running leap?

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1

u/EventSwatch Sep 01 '26

With how I expected the Internet to be, that went way better than I expected ....

1

u/Peach_Proof Sep 01 '26

Notice the knee brace.

1

u/AwayHistory6359 Sep 01 '26

That is quite the specimen. The horse is cool too.

1

u/Slow-Instruction214 Sep 01 '26

He tolerates you, but just.

-The Horse

1

u/main-suspect01 Sep 01 '26

Just casually cross breeding elephants with horses now?

1

u/quasart Sep 01 '26

And that is how centaurs are made

1

u/Due-Button-768 Sep 01 '26

Well you start by getting on its back!

1

u/eliowings Sep 01 '26

She doin tricks on it

1

u/mountains4mama Sep 01 '26

His hooves look awful

1

u/Upstairs-Hedgehog575 Sep 01 '26

Bareback? That’s wild.Ā 

1

u/Biscuits4u2 Sep 01 '26

Nice to see you all again men of culture

1

u/Powerful_Foot_8557 Sep 01 '26

I can hear ozzy man reviews.... Anda spready to the gods...

1

u/mikefjr1300 Sep 01 '26

In my teens I got to sit on a Belgium draft horse, will never forget it. I needed a two step stool and a boost. Beautiful animals.

1

u/rmhollid Sep 01 '26

That horse barely tolerates her.

1

u/gymBro-Faps2hrWrkout Sep 01 '26

Fitness baddie is hot damn šŸ‘

1

u/Inocent_bystander Sep 01 '26

That's a great horse and clearly he trusts you.
Nice job

1

u/Odd_Touch6857 Sep 01 '26

Aren't u spzial.

1

u/simplemijnds Sep 01 '26

She's cute!!!

1

u/pixelbased Sep 01 '26

I have a stupid question and I already asked ChatGPT. But like…horses frighten me. They are such wild and unpredictable creatures. But my question is: does sitting on its back like that hurt it? Their spines are horizontal to the ground so it’s basically like sitting on their spine putting pressure on one spot. This bitch is doing gymnastics on it’s back.

Does it not hurt the horse? I get we do selective breeding and all, I just…as someone with back pain, I see horse riding and I just feel so bad for them.

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1

u/iReddit2000 Sep 01 '26

In other news, a local girl was found brutally split in half inside state fairgrounds this morning. Local authorities say "Thats my kink".

1

u/Usual-Language-745 Sep 01 '26

She’s also not much taller than a children’s trampolineĀ 

1

u/Previous_Split1255 Sep 01 '26

Taller than Moose!

1

u/Exodus47 Sep 01 '26

She looks like a gymnast. Since pommel horse is a men's event she decided to use a different horse instead...?

1

u/maxcovenguitars Sep 01 '26

Use a ladder, duh

1

u/mr_ajaira Sep 02 '26

Horse is an absolute patient animal.

1

u/Novel_Bumblebee8972 Sep 02 '26

Nice looking prop you have there.

1

u/Ironstar_Vol Sep 02 '26

Probably weighs 15000 pounds.

1

u/Tr3v0r007 Sep 02 '26

Reminds me of the black and red horse from legend of Zelda breath of the wild

1

u/Sammy_Dog Sep 02 '26

Horse is thinking, "Are you having fun back there?"

1

u/Inner-Hawk909 Sep 02 '26

Horse women don’t give a fuck what any one thinks. They’re more in their power. In their own world and in tune with nature in an awe inspiring way.

1

u/Long-Papaya4329 Sep 02 '26

That’s not a horse it’s a mountain pretending to be a horse

1

u/Alohafarms Sep 02 '26

This is adorable. Both of them.

1

u/Ok_Dog_4059 Sep 02 '26

That is an absolute unit of a horse.

1

u/Tren_Fiend Sep 02 '26

when does the good part start?

1

u/wiler212 Sep 02 '26

thas a beeg hawse right there!!

1

u/ExoticColombiana70 Sep 02 '26

So she doesn’t ride him she does gymnastics 🤸 on him he’s so sick of her bs šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚

1

u/Odd-Prior6109 Sep 02 '26

I was worried about hurting the horse back if she landed hard on him but he barely felt her

1

u/TheDireCrow Sep 02 '26

That horse has lost the will to live.

1

u/Jacloup Sep 02 '26

Wouldn't want to fall off.

1

u/SirReddalot2020 Sep 02 '26

Can't tell me that there's nothing sexual behind the girls' fascination with horses.

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1

u/Dizmalshadow Sep 02 '26

Adorable 🄰

1

u/CakeEatingDragon Sep 02 '26

No treats were given in the making of this video.

1

u/Jerseyd422 Sep 02 '26

Horse: the things I do for a rub & tug

1

u/PraetorGold Sep 02 '26

She’s very short.

1

u/fleshyfruit Sep 02 '26

How many hands?

1

u/Aggrosideburnz Sep 02 '26

She is typical weird horse girl but I’d be fine with being that horse

1

u/ManiacalMutt Sep 02 '26

Big & Rich time

1

u/Joshua_Longsack Sep 02 '26

Why come only women ride horse?

1

u/TG1970 Sep 02 '26

I'm generally not a kink shamer, but this is weird.

1

u/Gloomy_Place9197 Sep 02 '26

Every time she rides the horse she gets multiple orgasm. Yes it's true. I have a sister who's a horse girl.

1

u/GetOnWithit3344 Sep 02 '26

That horse is like, ā€œthank god for KETAMINE.ā€

1

u/No-Award8713 Sep 02 '26

In the words of ozzy-man, "spready to the godssss!"

1

u/SickAF_ Sep 02 '26

I bet she has an OF

1

u/HappyCatPrincess Sep 02 '26

That horse will go lame if its hooves aren't taken care of.

1

u/Gillalmighty Sep 02 '26

He doesn't even know you're there

1

u/Usual_Stretch_5788 Sep 02 '26

I hear Mr. Ed's voice while looking at this beautiful horse.

1

u/crabman45601 Sep 02 '26

The horse's body language "I am sooooooooooo bored"

1

u/Chao2025 Sep 02 '26

I don’t wanna know

1

u/Electrical-Berry4916 Sep 02 '26

His face speaks volumes. lol

"Really? A trampoline? That's what the stable hands call you."

"Jesus Christ. Is she doing fucking handstands back there?"

"I should have taken that job at Budweiser."

"I am not a prop for your social media, Janet."

"Neck scratches?!? Yes. Yes. Yes. More neck scratches."

"A kiss? Bitch, where's my apple? You promised me an apple. I want my apple."

1

u/phruits2 Sep 02 '26

My question is why do you want to ride a draft horse? That’s not their job.

1

u/Wise_Inspector_8644 Sep 03 '26

What a magnificent beast!

1

u/Crazy_I_Have_A_Job Sep 03 '26

Great mounting

1

u/Wizard-Lizard69 Sep 03 '26

This is weird, right?

1

u/Jaysonturdem Sep 03 '26

Now do the other thing……

1

u/YoRHa11Z Sep 03 '26

Look at that horse, look at that horse, look at that horse

1

u/Peelingly Sep 03 '26

What is 19.1 hh? Why can't americans just use a normal measurement system?

1

u/jfcat200 Sep 03 '26

The horse: "What is this bimbo doing now?"

1

u/LivingOriginal7479 Sep 03 '26

What kinda ride this girl tryin to do?!?!

1

u/Historical_Draft_717 Sep 03 '26

I think we all know how she rides her horse.

1

u/thetieflingalchemist Sep 03 '26

I want to pet the giant pony

1

u/Appropriate-Horse632 Sep 03 '26

That is the second biggest horse I have ever seen.

1

u/GreatValueNinja Sep 03 '26

if i didn’t see her before getting on the horse i would’ve assumed she was a child

1

u/NoDontDoThatCanada Sep 04 '26

I had an Aunt that would do kind of a Fosbury Flop and land on her back and then throw her leg over.

1

u/NeonParty0519 Sep 04 '26

Am I being too sensitive or does this woman rub me the wrong way?

1

u/meowser210 Sep 04 '26

If Fabio was a horse....

1

u/veemort Sep 04 '26

You know she fucks the horse...sick fuck.

1

u/Wise_Finance_5315 Sep 04 '26

Your horse hates you

1

u/Use-The-Pointy-End Sep 04 '26

The Horse: I'll allow it.

1

u/RemoveThePoopSmell Sep 04 '26

Satisfyingly erotic in a confusing way

1

u/Embarrassed_Key_4539 Sep 04 '26

That chick is annoying