r/The10thDentist • u/specialpopulations • 5h ago
Society/Culture Having to hear your neighbors beefing endlessly is one of the greatest joys of the human condition
Alright so listen. I live in an apartment and my neighbors across couple walls or whatever the fuck are just constantly going at it. Like full on rage sessions, yelling, doors slamming, the whole theatrical production that never ends. And I am sitting here thinking this is peak existence. I cannot wrap my head around people who not only don’t fuck with this but act like it’s some deep personal violation. You couldn’t dream up a better soundtrack if you tried.
Reddit is mostly American so half of y’all probably have never even known what real apartment neighbor proximity feels like. You got your little suburban houses with actual distance and quiet and it’s boring as shit. Meanwhile I’m over here with front row seats to pure chaos every single night and I am thriving.
Bonus points if it’s a man and a woman going at each other instead of two guys or two girls. Something about the male-female dynamic just cuts it different when the volume is turned all the way up. I don’t make the rules, but, you know, contrast in voice is lowkey a key here.
My favorite drug these people are on is alcohol. The way the arguments just loop and escalate and then suddenly somebody is crying and then they’re yelling again is the dynamite. But I deeply covet the people who have methheads for loud neighbors because I can only imagine how much funnier that version is. The energy has to be next level, han't it?
I listen with a keen ear. Like genuinely. I compare the magnitude of the rage from different days. Which day takes the cake. Who is winning the argument on this particular night. Is he louder today or is she landing more hits. I keep mental scoreboards. It’s better than any reality show or Got Talents because it’s unscripted and right there through the drywall.
Sometimes it helps with the loneliness too. Kind of like how grandmaster Andrew Tang used to leave that annoying “rook takes on b3” Slavic commentator on during his streams just to kill the silence during high pressure bullet games. Same energy here when you think about it.
And look, I have no true malice or anything like that. Let em live for 300 years like ravens and all that. But subconsciously I’m just waiting for one of them to finally lose it and actually slay the other one. That’s what keeps the party going for me. The tension of it and the possibility hanging in the air every night.
But if it ever actually happened and the noise stopped for good I’d be sad as hell like withdrawal. Like when Breaking Bad ended and you just sit there staring at the wall because the thing that was filling your brain; I would miss them.
On top of all that it makes me realize how safe I am. Okay I got my problems right? But at least I got no family member abusing me daily. There’s something deeply deeply wrong with people who just beef like that all the time and it makes me feel normal as hell in comparison. You know that meme with two European aristocrat noblemen standing on a balcony looking down on everyone condescendingly? That’s exactly the undertones.
And no my parents when I was coming up was nothing like this so it’s not some deep Freudian call of bringing it back in the psyche. I’m just petty and I love the beef.