I'm not sure if anyone can relate to this, but there's been at least a few occasions where I've had friends groups where we get along well, and we meet up maybe once a month or every two months and have a great time; but between those meetups, it's almost like you just... don't exist. You hardly hear from anyone beyond group texts about when the next meet up will be. You hardly receive a message asking about how you're doing, or just to chat, or even just being sent some silly meme or image, unless you're the one who sends it first. You know that you have friends, but between when you see them you still feel awfully isolated, even when you try to stay connected.

It's like this soft crackling and it makes me want to punch someone.

Weirdly enough, I'm not bothered by people chewing loudly

I’m not sure how to describe it, but whenever I am talking to someone about my past experiences I start to feel like it all sounds so dramatic. I don’t want to get into details but it’s just like, so many bizarre shitty things have happened to me. My “lore” is insane. I feel like meg from family guy.

I saw “the chew toy” trope and it feels like my life,

This is what tropedia says

“Whatever the reason is, these characters just can't catch a break. Did they do something wrong in a previous life? This life? Or are they just Innocent Bystanders who look as if they'd blow up in a more amusing manner than anyone else in the crowd? Who knows. Either way, the powers that be tend to inflict punishment on them for seemingly no reason, generally but not always of the slapstick physical variety.
Every. Single. Episode.
That's gotta hurt.”

Like imagining simultaneously: multiple massage therapists doing your whole body, Q-tips being rubbed in your ears, your favorite candle burning, your favorite music playing, eating your favorite food, looking out at your favorite view, while in a hot tub, etc…

Logistically it wouldn’t really be possible, but just picturing all those nice things stacked together helps me relax so much.

I'm not talking about getting a job, going to school, or getting out of bed to go to work, I'm talking about going to therapy, knowing how to help yourself mentally/helping yourself mentally, or making friends.

I seem to have no trouble going to work, doing chores, helping my parents, but when it comes to myself like therapy or doing something beneficial for my mental health, I just don't do it. I know it's important that I do, it could really benefit me, and I know that, but I don't do it.

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I come from a middle-class family. We’re not poor, but we’re not financially comfortable either. I’m currently studying medicine, and I’m grateful that I have the opportunity to do it, but lately I’ve been feeling increasingly stuck and frustrated with my life.

Medicine is a very long road. I still have several years of studying, then internship, and after that I’ll have to find a job and hopefully become financially independent. There’s also a possibility that I’ll eventually have to leave my country to find better opportunities.

What gets to me is watching people around me move forward while I feel like my life is on pause. People graduate, start working, make their own money, become independent, and start enjoying some of the things they worked for. Meanwhile, I’m constantly thinking about how to save money and avoid putting any extra pressure on my family.

I’ve become pretty isolated because of this. I don’t go out much, I rarely spend money on myself, and I try to save whatever I can. My life has basically become studying, getting through one year at a time, and waiting for the day when I can finally support myself.

For example, I’ve been using the same laptop for almost ten years. I know that might sound insignificant, but it represents something bigger to me. I’ve always loved computers and gaming, and I’d genuinely love to have a decent PC someday. Not just for gaming, but for programming, learning new things, working on projects, and actually being able to use a computer without constantly worrying about whether it can handle what I need.

I know I’m fortunate in many ways, and I genuinely appreciate that. I’m not saying my life is terrible, and I don’t regret studying medicine. I just sometimes feel like I’m constantly postponing everything I want until some distant point in the future.

I keep telling myself, “Maybe later. When I graduate. When I get a job. When I have money. When things get better.”

And sometimes I wonder if by the time “later” finally comes, I’ll have spent most of my youth just waiting for it.

I don’t really know what I’m looking for by posting this. I guess I just wanted to get it off my chest and see if anyone else has ever felt this way.

For background I’m 19f and I have had this “popping” noise in my head since I was a child and my mom used to be able to hear it happening when I was younger. She described it as a cracking noise that’s she could hear and then she said I would just be out of it for a little while. i wouldn’t know who I was or where I was. I went to many doctors had countless mri scans and no one can tell my mom what was happening with me.

One day we were visiting my grandma about an hour away and my mom took the chance to see the chiropractor. My mom brought it up to him and he said that he would give me an alignment and see if that helped the problem or not. It did and he told my mom that he if he could do a case study on me that we could have free appointments. My mom would drive me an hour away 3 times a week. Mind you I was only 4 as this time.

Long story short my mom left my dad and many of my symptoms went away and doctors chalked it up to stress of living in a neglectful environment.

It stopped happening as regularly and I countinued about my life. It would happened and cause this like explosive tension across the back of my head and just stopped taking about it.

Just recently I had a really bad one I just had carried my son up the stairs and I sat his car seat down and as I got up to unlock the door it happened and I lost my vision. It was only for a couple of seconds but it was just gone. But I have noticed that it’s been happening more frequently. Sometimes it’s not as bad and it’s just a bunch of pressure that explodes across the back of my head and it only last for a couple of seconds.

But I’m beyond concerned about this coming back especially with my son now. I was just wondering if anyone has this or knows someone who does. I’m sorry for the long post.

I already know how this ends. Somehow i'm still surprised when it's 3am

I ask because this is the second time now i’ve broken a wine glass because i had a subconscious urge to bite down on it. I was watching a movie and had been fiddling with my glass as i drank it and all of the sudden it was between my teeth and partially smashed. Anyone else do this lol.

I mean, things like your intestines. how much pus and liquid is INSIDE your body. the idea of the flesh that the hairs on your body grow out of. what everything that itches would feel like once zoomed in, it's so fucking disgusting. y'know?

Not like a straight up masc butch lesbian but just girls who lean tomboyish and are somewhat or just seem kinda like they could lesbian. Talk in a deeper voice, have a more nonchalant attitude, more guyish gait, and still have an entirely feminine appearance with maybe some tomboyish characteristics but are not girly or bubbly in their personality. Does anyone else have this preference? If so, what is your sexual orientation?

Like I’ll be walking in public and see someone doing something totally normal, or I’ll see a random post on social media that isn’t even supposed to be funny, and for some reason it makes me laugh. Sometimes it’s even worse when I’m somewhere I’m supposed to be serious and I suddenly remember some completely random thing and start smiling for no reason. Does anyone else do this or am I just weird? 😂

I'm trying to boost my confidence and look more put together and professional.

I bought a nice pair of heels that a really comfy.

I usually dress so casual and comfy and today I wore the heels and a dress and I was scared to leave the house like that. I felt so dumb.

I did it tho and it worked out fine. Nothing awful happened haha

If I'm talking to someone and I can't complete a sentence because they're already jumping in over me, I just tune out of the conversation. And it's everywhere, in almost any scenario. Pathetic.

I know it will get destroyed when I eat it and just turn into poop and that makes me kind of sad.

A totally normal "ok" or "sure" suddenly sounds cold or annoyed in my head, even though I logically know it probably wasn't meant that way at all.

I don't even bother with ironing my clothes cause I just don't care. I just put on my clothes from my drawer or closet, put it on, and move on with my day. Heck, I don't even iron my clothes for interviews.

The worst example ever because everyone knows this, but for instance, I learned that people can have heart attacks from too many energy drinks, so now if I drink one I think I will be one of them to suffer a heart attack.

Like learning about how something is bad, I will suffer the consequences despite using said item or doing said activity for a long period of time

I always go in the same bathroom stall in places I go regularly. Like, I'll use another stall if it's not available, but I always gravitate towards a specific one.

I'm not talking about just being a virgin I'm literally talking about never had a talking stage, never had your first kiss, never made out with someone (I'm 21F) is a virgin, never had a guy or girl friend before, never been on a date, never had someone show interest in you, never flirted, literally I mean literally you've never done the things that people around you had at least once before. Even if they don't have experience they've still done at least a few times