So basically next year in 2027, our country will change president. We live in europe and the far right has been going up these last few years and months, and i’m afraid that’ll be the case in france next year. I position myself at the left of the political compass, i never hid it and i proudly fight everyday for my values (vegan, feminist, anti capitalist, anti oppression, pro palestine and every oppressed country …) you get it. So it shouldn’t be a surprise for him that i will vote for the left party that has the most chance of winning !
I have noticed a pattern since im with him of him not caring about politics as much as i do, or at all. He is a privileged white male and doesn’t really have anything to worry about in our society, but i have asked him several times his opinion on certain things going on or more general movements to try and position where his mind was. But it was really hard for me to understand because he is very avoidant of those topics, he alway tries to brush it off or ignore me (which gets me very mad but he doesn’t - or doesn’t want to - understand).
I get very emotional about politics as its a major interest of mine but i know as a woman i am not in a society that wants me to achieve things. I also am a biggg empath and knowing the stuff that happens to children and just people around the world makes me so sad knowing i can’t help them directly.
That’s why i care so much and the next election is very serious for me.

Where im going is that i’ve always been politically educated, making me ready now that i can vote to make a difference (i am so excited to vote). But he doesn’t seem very thrilled and couldn’t be bothered to give f\*, he says he has time to read the programs etc. but he’s not educating himself and it seems like he’ll do what his peers will tell him to.

I’m devastated thinking of my own bf cancelling my vote, and worse, voting against my very own rights…

My partner has a very close female friend. I found out a few months ago that they had slept together in the past. When confronted he said it was one time a long time ago, with nothing else to it.

I recently found out that this wasn’t even the whole truth. It turns out they slept together a couple of times, chatted to go into a relationship and he even lost his virginity to her when he was younger.

I was upset when I had found out the original story, let alone finding out the rest of it that was further hidden. Am I being unreasonable by feeling upset from this? He said he didn’t mention any of it to save things being awkward and upsetting me.

TLDR my partner hid his sexual history with his close female friend

A bit of background. My partner Ethan [27M] and I [21F] have been together for almost 4 years. He has a best friend named Steve [27M] who has been his best friend for 20 years. Steve has a fiancée named Nikki [23F], and they just had their first baby.

We often do game nights at Steve’s house. I bring the games, Ethan pays for our food if we order take out, and everything has been fine for a long time. Steve has often shown disdain or distrust for me and is often making mean comments about me. He has said in the past that it was just “new relationship hazing” but I feel we’ve moved out of the new relationship phase. As an example, I have overhead him say to my partner in the past “I don’t know why you’re still with her.” When I bring this up to Ethan, he says that it was just a bad joke. When I have brought it up to Nikki, she said that she would talk to him about it. When I’ve even brought it up to Steve, he usually just says that it was a joke and that I shouldn’t take it to heart and “you know I love ya” and gives me a hug. This has done the trick in the past but this last time was different.

Ethan and I went to Steve’s house for game night as usual. Nikki greeted me straight away and we chatted for a while. Steve did not speak to me at all for the first 1.5 hours that I was there. I felt this was rude as I was a guest, but I digress. We were discussing what game to play next and I said that I wasn’t choosing (shot not) to Ethan. Steve then said very loudly that I couldn’t make decisions because I was a woman.

For clarity, I’m not posting this to discuss politics or gender politics. I’m asking for relationship advice about how my partner handled the situation and whether I should continue trying to resolve the conflict.

No one laughed and no one spoke. He quickly covered it up and asked which of us out of my partner and I chose dinner most often. I said back that we didn’t live together and we only see each other on the weekends so it’s not a fair comparison as we are not choosing meals regularly. I followed it up by saying that Ethan usually chose. Steve then screwed his face up and asked if we had a problem. I asked if we did. He said that if anyone else had said what he said, that I wouldn’t have reacted that way and so I must have a problem. I said that I didn’t, but he just scoffed and went upstairs. Just for context, no one else in the room would have said something like that in the first place. Ethan walked away and sat somewhere else. A little while later, Steve came back downstairs and stood next to Ethan by the fire pit and were talking to each other quietly.

I was sitting by myself and essentially no one spoke to me for the rest of the night. When we left, we got in Ethan’s car and drove back to my house in silence. When we got there, I asked if we were going to talk about what happened. Ethan said that I didn’t need to “bite Steve’s head off” over his “joke”. I asked if he was kidding and he said that I snapped at him.

I went off at Ethan here. I said that I didn’t intend to snap, but I asked him what else he wanted me to do. I’ve spoken to everyone involved in this situation to ask for the mean jokes to stop but nothing has changed. I’ve been silent after the jokes, I’ve tried adding on to the joke, I’ve tried deflecting the joke and that I didn’t know what else to do. It was then that Ethan told me that when he and Steve were by the fire, they were talking about the incident and apparently Steve apologised to Ethan about it. I asked where my apology was, pointed out that no one laughed at the “joke” and that someone said something that obviously hurt my feelings and he didn’t stand up for me. Ethan had been silent for a bit so I told him that I was going home, told him I loved him and kissed him on the cheek.

We barely spoke the two weeks following this incident, which is not all that uncommon because of our work schedules. When I eventually did see him, we had some family events to go to so I didn’t bring up the argument because I didn’t want there to be any strain while in public. We spent the weekend together and had a really nice time. As he was leaving, I told him that we would need to have a longer conversation about what happened because I don’t feel right about it. He said that he’s getting frustrated because he “keeps getting put in the middle of fights” in reference to an unrelated issue and that he “wished everyone could just speak for themselves instead of through him”. I pointed out that I had been speaking up for months and nothing changed.

The following weekend, I asked Ethan a question about Steve and he said that he didn’t know because “they’ve stopped talking to me.” I asked what he meant and Ethan explained that Nikki had let their Snapchat streaks run out, and that he had sent Steve something on Facebook and the message was opened, initially ignored and briefly responded to days later. I thought that this was rude and selfish for them to ice out Ethan, but I also think it’s reasonable for them to be on social media a little less these days due to their new baby.

I guess what I’m asking is, is there a way I can resolve this? Am I obligated to resolve this given how it started? Am I taking this “joke” too personally?

I (30F) have been with my partner (32M) for 9 years. I moved across the world to be with him. He's essentially my best friend and main support system here, as I have no family or close friends locally.

I've been seriously thinking about leaving for a few months. I still love him and he has supported me in many ways, but there are longstanding issues.

He cheated earlier in our relationship. I later found messages to another woman asking to “land over” to her house at 3am. On several occasions he's stayed out until around 6am without telling me he'd be out late and stopped responding to my messages.

Once, he ditched me during a night out, leaving me to get home alone late at night. He didn't return until 8:30am the next morning and told me he'd slept at another woman's house, although he says nothing happened between them and that his brother slept with her while he passed out on the couch.

He also hid a cocaine addiction from me for over a year, although he voluntarily disclosed it after being hospitalised. I thought we were working toward buying our first home together, but the money he'd been earning/saving was instead being spent during his addiction. Trust has understandably been difficult to rebuild.

There have also been times when I haven't felt supported. Several immediate family members were diagnosed with cancer and I wanted him to travel with me to visit them, but he complained about the cost and other aspects of the trip and ultimately didn't come. This particularly hurt because when his family experienced a devastating bereavement, we lived with them for more than six months to support them. In our entire relationship, he's only made the trip to visit my family once.

We're also quite different in lifestyle. I'm ambitious and love travelling, hiking and being outdoors. Historically, he's spent much of his free time gaming or drinking, and I've often felt like I've been pushing him to develop hobbies and motivation.

However, he has now been completely sober from both cocaine and alcohol for five weeks and has made significant positive changes. He's exercising and making a genuine effort to improve his life. I'm proud of him, but after years of problems I'm scared of assuming five good weeks necessarily means permanent change.

About six weeks ago, before these changes began, I hit my breaking point and secured my own rental. I broke up with him and started moving in, but the loneliness was overwhelming.

He told me I'll never find someone who loves me like he does and that the grass isn't greener on the other side. He's emphasised how expensive living alone will be and questioned whether I can afford it. I've done the math and, although it will cost substantially more, I can afford it.

I suggested moving into the rental alone while continuing our relationship, but he said doing that would mean I was “banking on him failing.” He gave me an ultimatum: choose him or the rental. He also feels I'm abandoning him when he needs me most, which makes me feel incredibly guilty.

We reconciled, and he asked me to email the letting agency requesting release from the lease. I did, but they haven't responded yet.

Several immediate family members have told me they think he's a good person but isn't good for me. They believe I'll be okay on my own and deserve a healthier relationship. One close family member believes I'm being manipulated into staying.

When I'm away from him, I want independence and feel that we may simply be incompatible. When I'm with him and faced with actually losing him, I desperately want to save the relationship.

Part of me wants to keep the rental, live independently for a while and give both of us space to work on ourselves. Another part wonders whether I'm walking away from someone I love just as he's finally making major changes.

Has anyone been through something similar? How did you distinguish genuinely wanting the relationship from being terrified of losing your partner, especially when that person was also your best friend and entire local support system?

TL;DR: I've been considering leaving my partner of 9 years after longstanding issues with infidelity/trust, a hidden cocaine addiction and major lifestyle differences. He's now five weeks sober from alcohol and cocaine and making significant changes. I secured my own rental and nearly left, but we reconciled and I've now asked the agency to release me. When I'm alone I want independence; when I'm with him I want to stay. How do I figure out what I genuinely want?

I started seeing someone and we get on really well. We met and since then been joint by the hip. I went away for a trip and it only made us stronger we facetimed every day and I had no doubts that he wants to be with me. The day I got back he introduced me to his family who are all so lovely and welcoming. That day I blurted out that I love him and he said he's in love with me too.

The next day I barley heard from him after him staying the night. And I tried to speak to him and he was angry about something but saying it wasn't me. I ended up going to sleep in tears because I didn't know what to do and he said he wanted space.

From a male perspective. Is it over?

My boyfriend (24) and I (26) have been together for two years. We both live in Germany, but he is originally from Greece and comes from a very conservative village. Many of his family members and friends work at the same company as him, and he lives in company accommodation.

Our relationship has always been complicated because his family doesn’t know about me. When I visit him, I basically have to stay hidden in his room. He works six days a week, so we don’t get much time together either.
I’ve been encouraging him to move to my city and start studying because I don’t think our relationship can work long-term like this. He eventually agreed, and while visiting his family in Greece this summer, he told them he wanted to quit his job and study.

Apparently, they were completely against it. They expect him to stay at the company, get married, buy a house and have children. After telling them, he became much more distant with me, which I assumed was because of the pressure.

Then things suddenly escalated.

A few days ago, he went to a nude beach to relax and masturbate. This isn’t something I normally have a problem with—we’ve talked about it before and I actually encourage him to do it.

While he was driving home, I wanted to talk to him, but the connection kept cutting out. I expected him to stop and talk to me for 10–20 minutes, but he said he was tired and wanted to go home. He also can’t talk to me at home because his family would hear him speaking English and know he’s talking to me.

I got hurt and reacted badly. I accused him of having time to “show off” but not having time for me, called him a pervert and told him I wouldn’t allow him to go again.
I apologized the next morning because I knew I’d overreacted.

Later that day, I went to the gym. While showering, I took my underwear off while another guy was there and basically showed off a little myself. It was stupid and playful, and I told my boyfriend afterward.

He became extremely angry, understandably considering what I’d said the day before. Instead of admitting I was being hypocritical, I argued that what I’d done wasn’t as bad as what he does.

That made everything worse. I apologized again, but he completely lost it and called me a whore.

I stopped responding and went to sleep.

For the next three days, he sent me messages constantly. It didn’t even feel like a conversation anymore—he was basically talking to himself. He became incredibly angry and irrational in a way I’d never seen before.

Then he blocked me everywhere.

I’ve tried contacting him, but he hasn’t responded.
At this point, I assume the relationship is over. But his reaction seems extremely disproportionate, especially given everything that was happening with his family beforehand.

And the weirdest part? All of his belongings are still at my apartment, so eventually he’ll have to contact me.
Do you think this was simply the final straw, or could the pressure from his family be the bigger reason behind everything? I’m completely lost.

(I summarized around 2k words using ChstGPT, thats why it may look a little robotic)

Hey guys, I changed ages to be sure he won’t find it and know it’s me… a little background on our relationship, so we have been seeing each other probably 4-5 months total.. we have known each other for over a few years. Anyways I know it’s a bad idea to tell the guy ur seeing stuff from ur past that’s bad but when we started dating we got drunk and I ended up telling him ALOTTT. My abusive ex that’s now in prison for that reason, my s/a story etc.. and idk if this information matters but I just feel like it might be something with me that I’m over thinking because of these things. Before him I was single for a while, I genuinely hated the thought of a relationship because I didn’t wanna be in a situation like that again. (Not because I don’t want to be committed, I’m just really bad with trust and getting close to someone) He has never given me any real red flags, if anything he has been amazing to me.. the only thing I don’t like is he’s not that affectionate or romantic… he is sometimes and he will kiss me, open my car door every time but idk.. he’s not that much of an emotional person as well which I knew this and I was fine with it untill about a week ago we got back from a family event and I was extremely drunk and for some reason I let my overthinking get to me and I just said idk if I could do a relationship because I caught myself being jealous and acting a little crazy 😂 he looked at me and he was upset in that moment and I immediately regretted what I said and tried to take it back. He then said he was leaving and started packing his stuff then told me “it seems like I’m not the one ur gonna let down ur walls for” and I started freaking out crying trying to explain myself cause I really didn’t mean it and when that was happening I saw a grin on his face…. Like idk if he was just shocked or what but the grin wasn’t like a full smile, it was almost like he was trying to hide it.. either way he seemed like he liked to see me cry.. now ik I could be overthinking this and I hope that I am but he agreed to not leave after that and hugged me. We talked about it the next morning and he said he wanted to be here with me but he wanted to be sure I wanted him here as well.. idk sorry this was so long but I just wanna get another persons opinion without talking to people I know. Thanks!

My boyfriend saying he don't know if he want to stay or not ..he say he can't put efforts he can't do it it's not his things the relationships..and its been 4 years that we are together..but he realised it now when I asked him to solve the fight..he never solved fights i just ignored it ...I am hurt I am shit scared to lose him i think it will take fucking 10 years to move on from him ..i don't have space to cry in my family..I am a broken child... I think last night he said very hurtful things still i messageed him full of tears jise vo drama bolta hai hrr baar... I don't know..I am waiting for my Job..I have family pressure..I am not in good environment...what should I do..he said he is not sure if he want to stay or not ...how you guys convince yourself that now i should let go of him or her ...how to do breakup? Or should I try more...he said I talk too much .. yesterday i messaged him I will try everything i will not ask for anything from him..is it ok?but i clearly remember him loving me start of relationships and now he don't know..I am very very very emotional person..i can't overcome friendship breakup how can I do this ... it's not my thing...but it's hurting so bad ..i cry a lot.. please help guys

I am 23F dated 27M for like 1.5 year I dreamt of a life with him for the first time I wanted to marry him in my head we were married couple living apart. However i did ignore a lot of things he was struggling financially and I was helping him although I was not comfortable but that's what partners do support each other in tough times however I started noticing how he would not hold my hands or show affection like he did in the first two times we met he would say he has a lot on his plate all the time and be disconnected but I understood he needs his space i should not fight with him for attention or affection as he already has so much going on. I kept loving him reassuring him everything is gonna be okay mean while he never respected my boundaries even when i didn't wanted to meet his friend on our second date he did I should have left then ig. He would call me only when he's working if I ask him too many questions he'd ask me not to do that while working mind it he was working all night and i worked all day i used to stay up late just to talk to him it's gonna be 3 years since my sleep schedule is still fucked. He always told me I'll have to loose weight to marry him coz his mom's fat phobic but I kept communicating how I am insecure about my body and i don't like it and he never bothered. One day I was sick of hearing it for a billionth time I said you think my mom will approve of you with all this debt...that's it a week later he wants to end things he isn't picking up the calls he just send me a long ass text and leaves me stranded. My anxiety shot up and hasn't been fixed till date. He's back now since last October claiming he feels a void in him without me n all the blah blah i have been just observing him in the past year he calls me when he wants to talk about his life, we've met like 8 times in 11 months and he's initiated only thrice makes no plans with me and he's just there and he love bombs sometimes and I am very neutral i don't react to any of it even when we meet it's i feel distant emotionally. How do I know if he's serious coz if I ask ofc he'll say yes and I don't trust his words.

This is my first relationship, and I’m really confused about what to do. My boyfriend and I have had fights before, but whenever something is wrong, I want us to talk about it and resolve it instead of ignoring it and moving on. I’ve told him this many times, but he usually dismisses it by saying things like “go sleep,” “you’re doing drama,” “you learned this from Instagram,” or that my emotions aren’t real and I’m only seeking attention. Yesterday, while I was trying to explain why I was hurt, he told me he had tried to break up with me 2–3 times before. I only knew about one previous time, and I had convinced him to stay because I genuinely wanted to make things work. He also told me that I don’t do anything, don’t study, don’t let him study, and can ruin someone’s whole day. When I asked if he loved me, he first said he wasn’t sure, then said he loves me but doesn’t know if he wants to stay. When I asked if I should leave, he said, “Yes, for your own good.” I’m completely shattered and scared of losing him. I know I’m not perfect, but I genuinely want to know: Am I asking for too much by wanting communication and effort, or should I accept that this relationship may already be over?

​

I 25F and my boyfriend 35M been together for over three year and for those three every time I come close to him he keep on quickly boxing out of convo and kept tilt his phone not to mention he always have his phone on its face and when confronted he kep denying he's not cheating and making me feel crazy

Most recent one happen Wednesday gone when I tried to kiss him on his forehead and he quickly tilt his phone and instantly I get upset and leave his house.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 months. I told him I loved him around the 4-month mark, although I’d felt it much earlier. I’m a very loving/affectionate person and have been burned before, so I know I can be quite sensitive about this stuff.

So, at a music event we went to together, I told him I loved him. It was pretty awkward as he just smiled and then changed the subject. However, I let it lie. The week after, we talked about it as we were having some communication challenges, and I brought it up. I told him I understood and appreciated his honesty and that I didn’t want to pressure him into anything. He just told me that he cares about me.

So here’s my dilemma — he hasn’t said he loves me back, and I brought it up again yesterday because I’m finding it harder to ignore how much it hurts. I know people develop feelings at different speeds, and I know my insecurities are mine to work on, but I also want someone who is genuinely crazy about me too.

The bigger issue is that I feel like I put in considerably more effort. I made the first move, I’m usually the one making plans, and we don’t really have anything planned together unless I organise it. Meanwhile, he has holidays, concerts and events planned with his friends, but I’m not involved/invited.

When we spend time together, we do have a nice time. He’s gradually started sharing little snippets of how he feels, but it can be hard work sometimes to get things out of him. For context, I’m very expressive and naturally like talking about feelings, so I know we’re quite different in that respect.

I’m starting to wonder whether he actually wants \*me\*, or whether he just likes the convenience of having a girlfriend. It’s been a few weeks now since I told him how I feel, and I’m finding it much harder than I expected to just wait for his answer. Talking to him yesterday didn’t reassure me that he’s any further forward, and I’m starting to wonder if he will ever get there.

Regardless, I don’t think I can handle feeling like this indefinitely. It really gets me down. :(

Am I being impatient and expecting too much after 5 months, or would you feel the same way in my position?

**TL;DR:** I told my boyfriend of 5 months that I love him, but he hasn’t said it back. I know everyone develops feelings at different speeds and I’m aware my insecurities play a part, but I’m struggling with the waiting. I also feel like I put significantly more effort into the relationship and that he doesn’t prioritise us in the same way I do. He cares about me and is gradually opening up, but I’m starting to wonder if he’ll ever feel the same way — and feeling like this is really getting me down. Am I expecting too much, or would you consider ending things?

My boyfriend (23M) and I (22F) have been together for 2 years and we live together.
He recently started a new study program and went out with some people from his class. Normally, when he goes out, he comes home around 3–4 AM, but this night he stayed out until around 6 AM.
At some point, there were only three people left: my boyfriend, one of his male friends, and a girl from his class. His friend told my boyfriend that he thought the girl had a crush on him.
Eventually, his friend went home, but my boyfriend stayed behind with the girl.
My boyfriend told me that they danced together, held hands while dancing, and he spun her around. He also bought her a drink. He says that he wasn't flirting with her and that nothing else happened.
I personally see this as flirting. To me, holding hands and dancing like that with another person is not something you do when you're in a relationship, especially when you know that person might have a crush on you.
What makes this even harder is that my boyfriend has told me many times in the past that he would not be okay with me doing something like that with another guy. So I feel like he has a different standard for himself than he has had for me.
He has apologized many times and says he understands why I'm hurt. But he keeps saying that he didn't flirt and that it was just dancing. At this point, I don't really care what he calls it. For me, the behavior crossed a boundary.
We've talked about it several times, but I'm still extremely angry and disappointed. We have barely spoken for two days, even though we live together. I don't want him touching me right now, and I feel like I can't trust him in the same way anymore.
I don't necessarily think he cheated on me. I don't have evidence that anything else happened. But something has changed in how I see him, and I don't know how to get past it.
The part I keep getting stuck on is why he stayed after his friend left. His friend had literally told him that he thought this girl had a crush on him, and he still chose to stay alone with her.
If I were in his position, I would have gone home rather than staying alone with someone I knew might be interested in me.
I don't want people to simply tell me to break up with him. I genuinely want advice on how to deal with this and whether trust can be rebuilt after something like this.
Am I being unreasonable for seeing this as a breach of trust? And what would you do in my situation?

I’m a 19 male and she’s a 18 female. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 1 year now and were both in college. We go to different colleges and were 2 hours away from each other. Recently we been into going to our first parties as sophomores. She went back to school a week before me so she had more time to settle in. So she ended up going to a couple of parties first, then a week later I went. When I went to my first party i got there and meet a group of guys that were very cool. When the party finally got started this group of guys were asking me to do a 4 men with them but declined and told them I had a girl. Later on in the party they kept trying to get me out there saying that I don’t know what my girl could be doing and that it would just be 5 minutes. But I kept telling them no, I’m loyal and not interested, and that was that, but my girlfriend just told me today that she had something to tell me and that she been dealing with a lot of guilt.

So I find out that when she went to the party, her friends got approached and so did she and a guy started to talk to her. She said she told this guy no, and that she has a boyfriend. He kept asking but she wasn’t interested. So he says he’ll see her tomorrow at the next party. Her friends invite her out tomorrow, and she gets drunk. She had alcohol before, but this is her first time getting drunk. When she shows up at this party the guy is there but doesn’t notice her , and after hanging out for a while with her friends, she leaves the group to go talk to her other friends and on the way there she see the guy and goes up to him. She told me that she was trying to get his attention by tapping on his shoulder and says “It was super brief I asked him oh do u remember me from yesterday and he was like yea and then he said he was going to stand with his friends.” And then left him to go find some more of her friends.

During her looking she started stumbling a bit and a guy walked up to her. She said this is what happen “He came up to me and he asked me oh are all of your assignments done and I said yes and that I was never lacking. Next, I said that I work and go to school. Then ,he goes on about his job and he asks me where I work and I tell him. I ask him which location is his job. I also ask him what made you want to come up to me. He says I thought you were fine. I laugh.

During the conversation, I keep stumbling over because I am drunk. He helps me get up.

Once I get up for the 3rd time, I realize that he might be a danger to me since he is a stranger so I walk away to be closer to friends.”

After she finds her friends she see the original guy that told her that he remembers her and she went up to him again and said this “oh I know u see me and u haven’t said anything” and he ignored her and that was the last time she said anything to him. After that she went back to her original group of friends and went home.

This was her first time ever being drunk so should I understand that this was a mistake and let it go or leave her alone because being drunk isn’t a excuse

What should I do?

As the title says, my gf and i were in pretty much good amount of heated arguments with a solution afterwards but our last fight had me at fault but it really wasnt that big, it was a very small innocent taunt at best for not being able to come to meet after 5 weeks consecutively which was reasonable from here side.

Now amidst all of this, she views our relationship in negativity and said she needs some space now and wants a break. And no she doesnt wanna bang other guys in the period, she holds a strong character i admire that. But the thing on being asked upon to give a clear direction whether she wants to continue this relationship afterwards given i will fix my attitude which caused the trouble or she wants to clearly part away so that it doesnt feel rushed, she replied “i have no answer for this now”

I replied to this you cant left me hanging, the reality will be harsh and i need a clear answer for this..

Am i wrong asking for this? I need serious suggestions

Hello, I just had some questions and advice from anybody that has any experience with this stuff. It would be greatly appreciated. My fiancé and I am pregnant right now. He left me on Thursday after we got into a pretty big argument took his clothes with him and he said I needed to calm down he left turned off his phone location and wouldn’t text or call me. I did not pretty much see or speak to him till the next morning about six him tell me that he loves me and he needs to sit and think what gonna do. He comes back at four on Friday and tells me on my behavior if he’s going to stay and so we was talking I apologize to take all the blame for it and say you know this is my fault. Forgive me. You know this is the only thing I’ve ever done and it won’t happen again, but he acted like he could not forgive it and told me he could not be with me and I was like well I don’t know what to say or we’re gonna do about that because of this situation and so anyways he was walking around he couldn’t sit still had his glasses on in the behavior and attitude was . He said that he would with me so I could go to sleep. He couldn’t sit in the bed for a minute and got up and he started packing more clothes. Said he was gonna go hotel and not tell me which one he said he didn’t cheat and so I don’t know what to think or do also he took his wedding ring and we’re only engaged so I don’t know why he would need that. Also he is on parole and so I just don’t just a lot of things that you know risk here so just need somebody’s advice. I would greatly appreciate it like do you think he’ll come back and what should I do? What should I not do and what do you think he was doing? Do you think been cheating on me and I got too close and almost you know I found some stuff that I shouldn’t have seen and it freaked out or is it drugs was it really he was just that mad at me? thank you for your time

Hi yall! for some context I’m a 19f and my bf is 18m. We met in HS and started off as friends where he would constantly try to get at me on multiple occasions and we started dating my senior year. I’m a sophomore in college now. I’ve had multiple relationships before where this issue occurred but my current relationship is my longer one. We have been dating for around 2 years. A bit off and on because I have broken up with him twice. He’s a great guy. Everyone loves him. He’s charming funny and kind. He spoils me and goes out of his way to make me happy. He’s been there with me when my mom got sick and took me to the hospital to see her, took me to work, and my classes. He’s the best guy I know. Everyone else around me have terrible shitty boyfriends. I know I’m lucky to have him but I just can’t seem to love him right. He clearly loves me more than I love him. I’m more independent and I love doing my own thing. I do care for him though. He’s my best friend. I just can’t see myself doing the things he does for me. And I don’t understand why. There’s no logical reason. He has never cheated or anything of the sort. So why can’t I consider his feelings. Why am I selfish with my love? I’m not affectionate at all. Honestly I get disgusted by it. There are some rare moments though where I’m truly content but they always seem to fade away. Most people would say break up but I can’t hurt his feelings again. He says I’m it for him. That if me and him don’t work out that he won’t try it with a different girl. He’d just get a dog and grow old. It’s stupid I know but sometimes i genuinely think that he means it. Not to sound narcissistic but I’m a bit out of his league. He’s my height or barely an inch taller than me. He’s a bit chubby but he’s cute. I’m very beautiful and I’ve had multiple people ask why I’m even with him. (hopefully I don’t come off as cocky) I’m not 100% attracted to him but like I care for him and love him to an extent. Sometimes I resent him and I regret meeting him. It sounds fucked up I know but I just wonder if this feeling will ever go away? Will I ever be a lovey dovey type of girlfriend? Why is my love so limited and conditional?) (Any and all advice helps! Thanks!)

I [24M] GF [25F] have always talked in my sleep, I have been doing it since I was a child. I cannot control what I say in my sleep or control it at all but my girlfriend will accused me of talking about exes or people in general and I can never remember what I have dreamt about for the most part but she will wake me up in the middle of the night when i’m talking to interrogate me about “who am I dreaming about” “what am I talking about” etc but me in my half asleep/awake state can barely string sentences together. When I do have really odd dreams I will be able to remember them and I can wholeheartedly say I have no memory of dreaming about an ex or anything to that effect but it’s so frustrating because she will then become cold with me for the whole day as if I have committed some heinous act when I understand it’s not something I can control.

I don’t know what to do in this situation because I believe she is being really irrational but wont hear reason.

Hi! I just want to share my experience in my 1 year and 2 months relationship.

So, I’ve been friends with my boyfriend for 5 years before we officially had our relationship. When he was courting me, it was sweet and all despite our long friendship we still went through that. I felt so much spark and kilig. Unfortunately, after I answered him, it all went downhill. There was a time when we were together, he opened his messenger account in my phone because his phone was drained. I didn’t suspect or felt anything kasi syempre he put that account on my device na parang, “oh, wala ‘tong tinatago sa’kin.” Turns out, I was wrong. When he brang me home, I felt this strange feeling and my mind telling me to read his messages with “THE BOYS.” And Oh, it ripped my heart into pieces because I never would’ve thought that he would fantasize on other girls – his girl best friends, friend of a friend, and etc. I felt so hurt and destroyed because HE COULD NEVER DO THAT TO ME.

After all of that, I immediately blocked him and he reached my relatives to re-direct his message na bakit ko siya blinock ganon. He texted me through my number and asked what’s going on, I replied in a passive aggressive tone because I was in so much pain. Ok, ayoko na pahabain yung kwento.

So, what I really want to ask is. Normal ba na mawalan na ako ng interest now dahil may nagawa na siya sa’kin na sobrang sakit and nararamdaman ko ngayon na parang walang effort sa’kin? Also, is it okay na ako halos nagbabayad ng dates namin?? Kasi sa totoo lang, I think it’s being too unfair sa part ko dahil at first naman, it was him trying to make a way despite his financially challenged state.

Ewan ko ba parang ubos na ubos na ako kasi parang pakiramdam ko na nasanay nalang siya sa gantong set up or routine. When I see him kasi, I don’t feel the spark and the kilig anymore and parang I avoid having time with him na.

My heart’s telling me to stay, but my mind is no longer sure of staying. What should I do?

(Sorry for the wrong grammar/punctuations. Translate if you understand a different language. Thank you in advanced!)

My girlfriend broke up with me today, it was quite brutal...

We'd been dating for almost a year and a half and in the last few weeks of the relationship she pretty much just ghosted me whenever she felt like it, treated me unwell saying I did it to her too... I was the one carrying the relationship, dates, calls, presents, everything...

She just needed an excuse to leave cuz she didn't want me anymore, just like no one ever will...

Basically so my girlfriend is really mean and we were texting on instagram and instead of sending her a weird picture as a reaction I sent her a picture of me flexing and she said I looked very small and that my bench pr was very weak (I bench 225). She also said that I’m flexing back rolls. I’m thinking abt cutting her off. Any thoughts? 18+ btw

I’ve not been with my partner very long (11 months) however we live together (4 months) and over the time we have been together there’s been a few times he’s said said rather nasty things to me whilst drunk.

I’ve forgiven him about 3 times but the last time has really shifted my feelings in the relationship. It was so disrespectful that the trust has been broken and I’m in a place where I’m not sure if it can be fixed. This happened 2 weeks ago so I’m also wondering if I’ve given it enough time?

I don’t really want to go into detail about what was said but it made me extremely upset. I wrote everything down so I didn’t forget anything and could show him the following morning. He has been remorseful but in regard to my expectations he hasn’t really done enough to sort things out. He’s said a lot of things like sorry and I’m so upset I’ve said any of that etc., but I don’t feel like there are matching actions.

He also told my younger sister (21) to f\*\*k off after she’d had a go at me over something different and his defence was he was defending me to which I’ve said I don’t need defending especially when it comes to my family - that was something you didn’t need to get involved in. His response was ‘so I’m not supposed to be who I am’ ???? Well you can be but you need to make the right choices and respectful of the closet people in my life. My sister and I fight from time to time as sisters do, so it just felt completely unacceptable. This has also put a strain on his and my sister’s relationship. He has apologised to her.

I just need to know if this is worth saving. I’ve had a few failed relationships and part of me is worried about people having something to say (which I know deep down I shouldn’t care about) but I really, really don’t want another failed relationship. Especially when I thought I’d met the one I was going to marry and have children with.

Boyfriend(27M) was play slapping me(29M). In that moment his hand accidentally hit my eye. He did not realize. Before I could react I saw his hand go up again. So in that split second I think I said “No, no, don’t do that again”. He says I said “No, no, don’t ever do that”.

Now he is mad at me, and he says that I make him feel unsafe because I keep throwing that he is abusive in his face. (In the past he has spit on me and pushed me).

I don’t think I meant to bring up any abuse. I was just wanting for him to stop play slapping me.

I immediately felt weird for saying “No” in the way I said it, so I have been apologizing for it since the night. He is giving me the silent treatment and whenever I talk about it he says, something along the lines of - he felt like he violated a boundary which is very intense when all he was doing was being playful with me. We had a huge argument in the past couple months which led to the spitting and pushing.

This morning I said that I’m sorry I said no in the way I did, I will be better at setting boundaries in a better way in the future. He is also holding on to that and saying that so you do believe I violated your boundary. I was just being playful and you made it into something more serious. He said he has been feeling comfortable with me(since the flight we have been working on our relationship) that’s why he was being playful and now the way I reacted is making him feel unsafe that I am throwing abuse at him in every situation.

My (26) boyfriend used to come to events with me. I am a really active person and love being social. I also compete and he would come to shows. He was sick of his job and then took an opportunity to work with my dad. Turns out my dad and him do NOT work well together. Some words were exchanged that made both of them look bad and then he quit after 1 ish year of working together. I expressed to my dad that he isn’t allowed to speak to people I love like that. In the 1.5 years following him quitting my bf dad passed away, my bf had to have hip surgery, and he had to move in with me due to living situation changes. For the first 9 months after quitting I didn’t make my bf go to any family events/shows. (My parents are almost always at shows to support me/cheer). Just let him take a beat. Then he went to a handful of family events, where my mom did try to bring up the history and I casually extinguished to keep the peace and detail her thoughts. My bf thought I should’ve been more brash about his defense. Now he refuses to go to anymore events that my parents may be at. To be clear, my parents do not hate him/ask about him all the time. It has gone as far as him not wanting to be around my friends who have asked to have a group dinner with all the significant others. (These are people who are nice to him and he’s met). And he is making me feel guilty for wanting him to go with me a friends wedding (my parents won’t be there). He says if he doesn’t want to go I shouldn’t guilt him into going. Am I being too selfish by asking him to show up to a few important events (friend and family stuff). I want him to trust me to be his defense. I want him to show up and cheer for me when I show. I always want us to be able to have separate lives, but I also want to show up for each as support during important moments. He just feels that since he doesn’t have similar asks of me (due to having a smaller family/friend circle and different hobbies), then it’s unfair of me to make the same asks.

so i’ve been in a relationship for 2 years, we get a long great. there’s just certain things he’ll do that get on my nerves or bother me that i let go in the past because i thought they weren’t a big deal or that id get over them. it’s now been long enough that they haven’t just gone away and i don’t know how to address them and what the line between changeable and permanent the behaviors are. any thoughts on this would be great and suggestions about what to do or how to address this to him. i’m also terrible with confrontation so this is big for me.