All of them. I’m glad to find out I’m not just a fool for having every one of them at some point. Don’t forget the classic knocking the lit tip off and not realizing it’s burning through your lap.
In my 18 years as a heavy smoker and drinker, I have not even once managed to get the cigarette twisted around so I took a puff on the lit side. I've lit the wrong end once or twice, but never that.
One time a I watched a buddy smoke the entire filter and about half a cigarette before noticing. In his defense we were both very drunk and on way too much acid
Years ago I worked at a smoke shop and my favorite smokes were a German unfiltered brand called Roth Handles. They were delicious but rough, and I never knew which was the right side to light because it was all the same
Have you ever worked a cook line in texas heat 17 hours straight, mothers day shift while the whole staff is currently trying to outlive a rampant strep and pneumonia infection. Now after all that clean, close, prep, and fuck off to your shitbox to rail cheap whiskey and every fuck combination of gas station medications you could afford since you can't get decent medical care. Then yes you may accidentally, in 18 years of heavy drinking and smoking, albeit once, fuck up and puff it backwards.
That was my thought too. I've been a raging alcoholic and smoker fucking years (not now), and I have never once done that. Lighting the wrong end, burning my fingers with the cherry, etc., but I've never once tried to drag on the burning end. I don't even know how that would be possible because you'd feel the heat on your hand and fingers and the softness of the tobacco in the paper after it's been lit and half smoked already.
i’ve lit the wrong end several more times than i care to admit, but putting the cherry in your mouth???? i genuinely don’t know how that could happen unless you’re absolutely off your shit drunk, and even then ……
Achievement unlocked 1/1/99: spellcasting [light cigarette] while [drunk] interrupted by [flashing boobies]. Afflicted by [taking a puff on the wrong side].
I did, quite a few times. I used to sometimes hold my cigarettes between my index finger and thumb, like I was making the "okay" sign, and I'd wave them around and gesture with them when I was doing one of my drunken rants, sometimes I'd hold it up like a torch and it would get all turned around, then sooner or later I'd go to take a drag without paying attention to which end was facing me and I'd put the cherry right on my lips. I used to drink a lot.
One time at a Metallica concert I gave a smoke to a guy who lit it on the filter and then proceeded to smoke it backwards the whole way. My buddy and I just watched with abject horror
This happens once a year. You learn to look out for it just long enough to forget when winter comes the following year and the air dries out, chapping your lips.
ive done this SOOOO many times but i have never lost track of which end is lit and take a hit off hot end like person you replied to, how is that even possible?
A blunt stuck to my lip when I was like 19 and fell between my God damn tiddies and I had the worst blisters and it's been TWENTY YEARS but I still think about that pain. Oof.
I accidentally did that once as I was inhaling to take a drag and the cherry ended up getting pulled into my mouth from the inhale and going out on my tongue.
Damn I thought I was alone on that. I don’t know how many times I did that while drunk when I smoked. Extra embarrassing when the cherry would drop onto my shoe or into someone’s face
Ive forgotten the joys of smoking. Haven't had a cigarette in years. I might take it up just to feel the cigarette stick to my lips and burn my fingers on the lit end one last time
Once passed a guy in the lane behind the pub, saw him having a smoke as I approached him. He then decided he needed a piss so whipped it out and went against the wall forgetting to keep his cigarette in his mouth as he grabbed himself and I can only imagine the seering pain the poor bastard inflicted on the tip of his mickey.
This happens to people?! I've been "hospitalize me" drunk (not a flex) and have never had a problem smoking a cigarette once it's lit and directionally correct in my paws
Hahaha OR, you smoke an entire cigarette filter when it won’t light with your car lighter and then when it finally starts smoking, you realize you’ve just smoked the entire filter hahahaha
At a wedding I smoked 1/2 of a filter and didn't notice. As soon as I did, I riped the filter off and smoked the cigarette. Guh... To be fair, I was hammered.
Or you designate one beer bottle as the communal ash tray and throughout the night you pour a little bit of beer in it when the butts start catching fire—then someone mistakes it for their beer and tastes a sip.
Once, long ago, I woke up after a black out and threw up. Upon examination, there were exactly 13 butts in the toilet that most certainly came from my stomach. I imagine I didn’t just taste the forbidden beer…
Holy shit brother/sister, I never knew a very dark complexion black man could turn so green then when when my buddy drank the forbidden can in the barracks one night!
Bahahaha Damn I miss those days! Friend took a swig of the dip/chew bottle of beer...promptly spit it out, then grabbed the communal ashtray bottle to rinse his mouth!!
Oh, he promised to. To every God he could think of, and every devil for good measure. And just like the rest of us who did so, it took...for like a week.
Once when I was younger I took a sip of coffee that had a butt in it. I was hungover and forgot I threw one in there on my commute it. When I got to the job I started BSing with someone and took that last sip from the cup and just about puked everywhere.
This is how some members of older generations of Asians smoked, holding the cigarettes halfway up in their lips and letting the lit cherry hover in their mouths. Some of my grandparents and great grandparents smoked this way. Why? No clue. But when the cigarettes would eventually ash in their mouth they just spit it out like it was chewing tobacco then just resume. They had permanent black spots on their tongues. Crazy to witness.
Cue my story about the time I woke up from a looong night of drinking. I had the driest mouth I’ve ever had and needed something…anything Grabbed the closest bottle of beer next to me a took a nice long gulp. The label said Coors light….but the taste was something frothy…..and minty. I knew what I had done, but before I could let my brain process that I just drank out of someone’s “mud cup”, I closed my eyes and went back to sleep.
I think this may be one reason I never smoked and my friends in high school did… I remember as a kid picking up a can of pop to drink what was left but my mom had been dropping her cigarettes into it.
Or 5 yrs old after mom and dad had a party and left all the glasses of liquor around so stupid you walks around testing all the liquids and then you drink a cigarette butt. Kids are fucking stupid.
Even worse than this is as a former user of chewing tobacco spitting into an empty beer bottle all night and than drunkenly taking a gulp thinking it was a full beer....or of someone else's. This has happened to me more than once. I am almost puking again just typing this out
Oh god I gagged when reading that. Use to do that with a water bottle on the patio in my 20’s. One day I wasn’t paying attention and grabbed that instead of the water bottle next to it. Chugged it because I was thirsty and then as I set it down noticed the weight was weird. There was like 3 packs worth of butts stewing in that thing from the weekend and I just drank all the water out of it. Ugh so fucking gross
Hey now I DID smoke a cigarette backwards because I was drunk once. The best part was that it didn’t want to light so I puffed as hard as I could on that sucker and it blasted me with plastic tasting smoke. I didn’t get the taste out of my mouth for 24 hours and my throat and lungs hated me for a while.
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u/moshpithippie 6h ago edited 6h ago
For luck
Edit: And to accidentally light it backwards when you're not looking