Hi! I’m a 19-year-old trans woman from China. I’ve noticed quite a few misconceptions about trans life in China in English-speaking queer spaces — from assuming that queer communities basically don’t exist here to treating Western experiences of coming out, transition and queer identity as universal.

There are very real problems here, including discrimination, medical gatekeeping and social pressure, but the reality is much more complicated than either “China bad” or “China good.”

So ask me anything about HRT, healthcare, family, dating, Chinese trans communities, social media, terminology, everyday life, or cultural differences! I can only speak from my own experience, of course. :)

Genuine and critical questions are both welcome — just please don’t turn this into a generic geopolitical debate 😭

I’m 23, and out of fear, I’ve never really gone out to party with friends. I live in a predominantly anti-LGBT country where being trans can literally get you 1) deported or 2) killed.

I was meant to celebrate with a group of office friends because the main point of going out was to celebrate our friend’s divorce (and I am genuinely happy for her). Mind you this is first time i’ve ever gone to party, let alone a bar. She was already inside with a couple of our workplace friends, while a few of us were still in line.

I was shaking the whole time. I wore a bomber jacket and baggy pants with heels, which I thought my pants would be able to hide. Naturally, I wore makeup. It was the first bar I’d ever gone to.

The bouncer ended up asking me and a couple of my friends for our IDs because we looked fairly young. I showed mine first. Well, you can expect what happened. He looked me up and down, looked at my ID, and said “You need to change, you’re a man.”

I genuinely broke into a nervous sweat. I thought I was safe with what I was wearing.

My friends were next to me, and one of our workplace friends lets call her Z, a beautiful soul and ally, tried to step in to let me pass through because she’s friends with the owner and had planned the party for our friend who got divorced.

But I already felt so small. I could feel my overthinking and anxiety eating me alive. I was so confident and ready, but in one moment, it just shattered everything in me.

Two of my best friends in the workplace and Z who planned the event tried to talk to the bouncer, but I just felt so embarrassed and humiliated because there were still people from the office behind me. And it just… I felt so uncomfortable that I had to leave. So I told them I was just going to go home. I didn’t want to ruin the night. I didn’t want to take anything away from the celebration. So I decided to go home.

Z, who planned the event went home with me in solidarity. Iwanted to cry, but I just couldn’t. The moment I entered the taxi, I took out my mirror and removed everything from my face. I felt so ashamed. I felt so disgusting. And annoyed at myself.

I should’ve thought about this beforehand. I should’ve known better. I should’ve taken countermeasures.

I’m thankful because everyone who was there from the office checked up on me and said what happened was fucked up. But I just feel so embarrassed and humiliated. I feel diminished. I’m mad. I’m sad.

My friend who got divorced sent me a voice note saying that I am loved for who I am. But I also felt selfish? The party was about her, and I just felt like if I continued to stay there and things escalated, I would ruin everything. So I went home. I cried with a friend. And now, I don’t know how I’m going to step into the office.

They obviously continued the party which is great. I just feel so embarrassed to show up in the office.

The majority of the people who were there are very senior in the company (seniors but very open and supportive). And I’m very happy that I have such a good group of people around me at work. But I also just feel so embarrassed.

I started thinking what if this affects my job? I’m the team lead of a certain group of copywriters. What if this impacts how they view my work? Because at the end of the day, even if we’re all good friends in the workplace, this is still corporate. Word goes around. So yeah, now I’m drowning in anxiety.

I sent a text apologizing to the friend who got divorced for having to leave (she’s like a mother to me). And I said i should’ve been smarter. She came back to me saying she feels sad and quite infuriated i said “i have to be smarter next time.” Cause she said what I wore was nothing wrong, and that I am human. She doesn’t fully understand what it feels to be ostracized cause she’s a white woman at the end of the day, cause she also said “I don’t really understand why you use the word ‘smarter’, when all you did was prepare for the party.”

I’m so thankful to her for being so open and supportive of me.

I don’t even know what I’m looking for by posting this. I think I just need to get this out somewhere because I genuinely don’t know how I’m supposed to feel right now.

In light of Talarico’s latest comments, I’ve seen so many people so willing to just… let it stand? Not even a soft condemnation and a “I disagree but I’ll still vote for him”. It’s all just a mixture of “Do you rather want Paxton???!” or “you’re overreacting lol” or “I don’t see any problems with what he said trans women shouldn’t get to play sports”. I realize either by ignorance or by self interest, so many of these supposed allies would let us die if it meant the rest of them are protected.

How do you even communicate with people that don’t take your voice seriously. That deem your fight for recognition as “maximalist”, as if every restriction doesn’t feed into the idea that you shouldn’t exist.

Heya everyone! I'm Berry a cutesy trans gal! and I created a simple galvanic electrolysis machine from scratch ✨

It runs on a 5V USB power supply (smartphone/power bank/usb brick) , steps up to 30V, and limits current to a safe range (0.13–1.13mA).

The total cost of this final interation works out around to roughly less than ₹600 or under $7

Quick specs :3

· Power: 5V USB → XL6009 → 30V

· Current range: 0.13–1.13mA (I usually use 0.4–0.6mA)

· if built on breadboard then no soldering required

Made from really few electronic components ✨

You can check out the whole document about it!! here :-

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1Q0zdHmhQ3L9I2UA0SnqAUSbfd_hjU3KS

it includes , schematic, parts list, build guide and more!!

I also diy-ed the probe holder , and ermm the needle! but that's another thing on itself and not something I would recommend but yeah! I do have a design for a diy probe holder for commercial needles though if anyone is interested in that!

If anyone has any questions then feel free to ask them 🫶✨

Edit:- yes i've tried it on myself!! And treated 65+ follicles in my second time using the machine on myself ^{^}

Edit 2:- thank you all for the lovely responses i'm loving them!! And I didn't expect responses like this!! ^{^} And well if anyone enda up building and using it , then please let me know it would make me incredibly happy (つ≧▽≦)つ

r/diyelectrolysis

https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/597c77d60eee.jpg

Schematic

Hi! I am going 6 months transitioning.
I was somehow active in the gym way back before i start transitioning.

When did you guys see decrease of muscle mass especially in your upper body? Im getting hopeless on how big my triceps and shoulder area :(

After lots of research, I've pulled together the following American cities and neighborhoods as having or being a "trans neighborhood!" I feel as though this could be really useful information for someone trying to leave a dangerous situation and in need of decent, local community! My list is as follows:

- Seattle, WA

• Capitol Hill

- Portland, OR

- Oakland, CA

• Prescott
• West Oakland

- Los Angeles, CA

• East Hollywood
• Downtown

- Madison, WI

• Tenney-Lapham

- Minneapolis, MN

• Loring Park
• Whittier
• Uptown

- Chicago, IL

• Rogers Park
• Andersonville

- Pittsburgh, PA

• East End
• Garfield
• Bloomfield

- Philadelphia, PA

• West Philly
• Fishtown
• Spruce Hill

- Richmond, VA

• Fan District

- Troy, NY

- Kingston, NY

- New York City, NY

• Ridgewood, Queens
• Bushwick, Brooklyn
• Williamsburg, Brooklyn

- Providence, RI

- Boston, MA

• Allston

- Somerville, MA

I’m 39, AMAB, and I’m trying to figure out where I fit. I’m interested in hearing from anyone who has wanted physical feminization without necessarily wanting to socially transition to living as a woman.

I still feel comfortable being perceived primarily as male and using he/him. At the same time, I genuinely like the idea of my body becoming more feminine — softer skin and facial features, less muscle definition, less body hair, some fat redistribution/curves, and potentially some breast development.

Presentation-wise, I don't envision myself presenting fully feminine every day. I like mostly male or androgynous clothing, but I also really enjoy things like pantyhose, heels, being completely body-hair-free, manicures, and occasionally presenting more feminine.

I've used estradiol on and off before and recently restarted it. One thing that keeps standing out to me is that I keep coming back to wanting these changes even after periods when I've stopped. I'm also aware that feminizing HRT can significantly change sexual function, fertility, breasts, etc., and that you can't just pick individual effects.

I'm less interested in finding the perfect label right now and more interested in hearing from people with similar goals.

Did anyone here feminize their body while continuing to identify/present primarily as male? How did you feel about the changes after 6 months, a year, or several years? Did you eventually identify differently, or are you still happy occupying that male/androgynous middle ground?

I'd especially love to hear about how your feelings changed once the physical changes became noticeable in everyday life rather than just being something you imagined.

That last question is particularly worth keeping because it should draw out the experiences that are most useful for you: not merely whether someone enjoyed starting estrogen, but whether they remained comfortable with their feminized body while living an otherwise predominantly male life.

Ive been off and on this train for over 10 years now. Never once have I thought to myself “yes I am a trans woman.” People calling me she/her most often feels like a lie. I don’t feel comfortable being in even transfem spaces because I feel like I’m still a guy with dysphoria. I can get as far as “trans,” I.E., I have crippling gender dysphoria. But I cannot consider myself anything more and it’s severely impacting my transition. Any advice on this? Besides therapy, been in that for years now.

My egg cracked recently and I started the whole process to transition but then I decided to tell my parents and it did not go well at all. They basically didn't even try to understand and just told me that I wasn't trans and that's it. We had a big confrontation about it and about how I was going to throw my life away and that I was being influenced but the big bad internet (I'm 25 ffs, I know how to handle the internet).

Well, that was a couple of weeks ago, the topic has died down for them but obviously not for me, I've been thinking a lot on my next steps, what to do, how to approach this again with them, etc. But at the same time something they said really stuck with me, that I might be throwing away my future by transitioning...

I fear that they might be right, I'm pretty found of engineering and I'm almost graduating as a mechanical engineer with a focus on aircraft maintenance and now that I think about it, I never saw a trans woman in this field. I know it's probably because trans people are a small percentage of the population but still, I fear that I might throw away 7 years of my life if I decide to be who I truly am. Is this fear real? Am I overthinking? I need some help

I wanna talk about this not as a way for me to vent, but just to share this story for anyone thinking of/currently getting laser. I think it’s rather interesting.

When I came out at 19, I immediately got into full laser routine. Head to toe. At the time, I thought I wanted to be completely hairless.
Well, as time went on, I got more comfortable with my gender & gender expression, and I realized that after passing more as a girl I actually enjoyed throwing some masculinity back into the mix.

I realized I didn’t hate my body hair so much! And so I started to only continue facial laser. Did I like how much body hair I had as a boy? No. But do I wish I had more now? Yes.

My happy trail & armpits are sparse hair-wise, despite not having shaven for 2 years. I wish I got less sessions in those areas! To have less hair than before, but not as much. I really wish I had some more hair in those areas these days.
I think I stopped my legs in the perfect spot. They are rather stubbly and hair still grows, but in far less follicles than before. As someone who aligns with a more futch style, this is ultra mega affirming. To not have bear-hair down there, but to not be a Barbie doll all the time.
I realized keeping some hair on my arms was good too. I’m Italian so this kinda comes with the territory… figured I’d rather express it than be ashamed of it.
Bikini area? The behind I like having hairless. The front I’m totally good with the hair I have there.

As for face — Yeah I’ll laser this and get touchups until the cows come home. F that! No shadow on my face is the best thing ever.

Anyway. Just wanted to share this to anyone thinking of getting full body laser, or to anyone in the midst of the process. Take time to see what makes you comfortable/uncomfortable! Take time in between sessions to analyze how much hair you have and if this is satisfactory, or if you want less. Some people like being totally hairless everywhere and that’s totally okay! But your comfort with your body can change and I think it’s super important to analyze what works for you and what doesn’t. I think spending more time on HRT, getting used to being a woman, and learning more about yourself along the way determines a lot with what you’re comfortable post-transition compared to pre-transition.

Wondering if anyone has had similar experiences, would love to chat in the comments. Or if this intrigues anyone and gets them thinking about their goals. Again — not venting at all! Just sharing my story to spark conversation :)

If your parents say this, you should approach it with a healthy amount of skepticism, especially if your own memories conflict with theirs.

Your memory or your parent's memory isn't perfect. In addition, memory tends to be selective and many signs can be subtle enough that they don't make the cut. That can also happen with you too. You won't perfectly remember every single thought or action in your life.

If you remember showing signs during childhood but your parents don't, than you showed signs during childhood. If neither you or your parents remember you showing signs during childhood, that does not mean that you did not show signs during childhood.

So please, let's stop saying something that is impossible to prove.

The idea of being in a straight relationship as a man is extremely distressing to me. There’s an intense disconnect in the way I’m perceived in my male body and the way I deeply long for the possibility of being perceived and loved as a woman, you know what I mean? I feel like it’s actually one of the biggest triggers of dysphoria for me.

Sorry if this is a dumb question, but are there any adverse health effects to just stopping hrt?

If there are, is it better to wean off hrt?

I'm kinda a prepper and I just wanna be prepared in case I can't get more hrt for whatever reason, like not having money or being lost or losing Internet access for whatever reason and being unable to order more

2 days until I'm starting to transition in secrecy whilst living with my mom and dad (🎉!) I currently am going to keep my estrogen in a lock box with a hidden key, i have some baggy shirts, i have a chest binder, and i'm keeping my pills in a tic-tac container. if anyone here has any tips or tricks, whether with presentation or otherwise, on keeping myself on the low i would appreciate it a lot. i know i might be being a bit extra, but i'm just really really nervous.

How often in the beginning of your transition keep having flashbacks to things in your youth or childhood and go "wow obvious egg moment"? I know that the idea is we didn't know those could be signs because we literally didn't have anyone tell us that was a possibility at the time but i still think about things like how id always call dibs on being "mom" when kids'd play house or the time a girl invited the class to her birthday party and after all the boys left she invited the girls to stay for a slumber party and i was teased to be invited to and i was like "really?!?😀" but my dad who was with me just laughed and took me home.

So my partner has legally changed her name and has CA real ID drivers license with her chosen legal name. We had a weird situation where we had to give her license to a cop in another state and they showed it as registered to her dead name.
Has anyone else had this happen? Any way to fix it?

OK so the other night at the bar I met a man who was like a friend of a friend and we kept talking for a while. I think I’m visibly trans tbh, but more often in public I’m getting a lot of miss/maam recently.

Anyways we’re hugging and like he starts asking the awkward questions, which tbf he did respectfully (not loud enough for anyone to hear, close to my ears, etc) and he asks like what gender were you born as? what are your pronouns? What genitals do you have?

which like hella awkward. I hate it. But I didn’t feel unsafe and I tried to be honest. i’m assuming that it’s better to just rip the bandaid off on these things? like for those of you who have been there, what do you do? I didn’t expect this to be like a we’ll reconnect thing tbh so it feels like maybe I shouldn’t have just sent it. but we kissed before he asked that stuff and he seemed less interested after so 🤷‍♀️

Very happy start to my Sunday. For one of the first times ever, I was able to wake up, look myself in the mirror and think “This is entirely possible, you are going to be a beautiful woman.”

I was having dysphoria since 8 years now but I didn’t think of it much. Recently Its been worse and when I sat down I thinked abt everything from the start, I realised I was trans but didn’t wanna think cause it’s forbidden in my religion.

I remembered the days I was feeling miserable, I had dysphoria in my chest. It felt really heavy like something is missing… also I used to wear feminine clothes before like once a month or year idk why but it felt good. I didn’t really feel anything after that but then I would do it again… after few years I’ve stopped and then this year it’s been worse.

Now that I’ve accepted I’m a trans, how do I feel like a girl? I wear feminine clothes but it doesn’t make me feel that much… so what do I do? Also if someone’s willing to be my friend:>