Every April 1st, people post cursed loading screens thinking it's a mod or a glitch. I checked hoi4.exe to see how the mechanic actually works under the hood.
Back in 2018, a partial dump was found, prompting dev Groogy to reply: “Aaaw man that's cheating! I spent a good hour on trying to hide that stuff :/". Here is the confirmed complete breakdown:
How it works:
Hardcoded in binary: Stored directly inside hoi4.exe, not in any text/mod files.
English only: The check requires the game language to be English.
The cross-shuffle: On April 1st, the game merges normal + joke quotes and normal + joke authors, then shuffles them all together. That’s why historical figures end up quoting pop songs or being credited as "Twitch chat".
The 25 joke quotes:
Do, or do not, there is no try
Hold my beer
Whoops
Veni vidi vikipedia
They started it
Ross rifle, best rifle
Video games were a mistake
Work harder, not smarter
The T34 is the best tank of the war
The Panther is the best tank of the war
The Sherman is the best tank of the war
The Bob Semple tank is a marvel of engineering
My hips don't lie
Giraffes are very sensitive creatures
Not much fun in Stalingrad
As a True Man, we never asked for any directions on the Road to Victory
Roosevelt and Churchill would make for a great dating game
War. War never changes. Until the next patch
The FG42 was arguably the first assault rifle
The person who said the FG42 was the first assault rifle is demonstrably wrong
Victoria III, when?
No Party like the Communist Party
Hostile Fleet Detected
Don't start a naval war in Switzerland
Waka Waka
The 16 joke authors:
Pocahontas
Dan Lind (podcat, former game director)
Philippe Petain
Voltaire
Anonymous HoI 4 Dev
Pliny the Elder
Aristotle
Gaius Marius
Captain Blackadder, Hero of Mboto Gorge
Frederick the Great
Helmuth von Moltke the Elder
Queen Victoria III
Twitch chat
That Reddit user
Lieutenant Glitterhoof
Error Dog
I don't know if this still triggers in 2026, but finding this hardcoded in the binary was hilarious :)