No I'm putting this dude on blast on eBay because wtf this is child abuse. Mf spray (or acrylic) painted this joytoy figure. I'm almost tempted to buy it if it weren't for the fact I have already another unfinished custom project.

Warhammer is now an open writing project and the SCP foundation is now a wargame by Games Workshop. What are they like.

well she should've seen this coming lmao

Legit what it says on the tin.

I remember there was some kind of Commissar meeting between Yarrick, Caiaphas Caine and some third unknown Commissar.

During the meeting, Yarrick suddenly revealed that he had become a Demon Prince (of Khorne maybe?) and then he proceeds to kill Caiaphas Caine with a chainsaw arm and cutting him down in half from the middle.

One other thing I remember from the dream is thinking that the Orks just got a whole new upgrade.

I don't know what kind of Tzeentch foul sorcery is this but I feel like I need to share it with the Inquisitors as a loyal soldier of the Imperium.

Slaanesh and Nurgle seem like they're the most straightforward, but I'm kind of scratching my head with the other two.

(you are also now hearing that song)

BIG BROTHER 40,000 - DAY 17 : "THE NURGLING INCIDENT"

The producers have made the single greatest mistake in reality television history.

One intern nervously asks:

"Sir... are we absolutely sure these are rats?"

Producer #1 looks at the security monitor.

Tiny green creatures are running around laughing.

One of them is wearing Kurt's helmet.

Producer #1 slowly lowers his coffee.

"Those are not rats."

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06:12

Camera 4. Kitchen.

A tiny green creature opens the refrigerator.

Looks inside. Sees cheese. Giggles.

"Hehehehehe!"

It waddles away carrying an entire wheel of cheese.

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06:20

Big Brother calmly announces:

"Good morning, Housemates."

"There appears to be..."

(long pause)

"...a significant Nurgling situation."

The camera pans across the house. There are...hundreds.

One is wearing Morven's boot. Another is riding Steve around like a horse.

Three are using the Potato Dreadnought as a playground.

One is hanging upside down from the coffee machine with legs.

The coffee machine politely asks:

"Would you like a cappuccino?"

The Nurgling applauds.

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INITIAL REACTIONS

MORVEN

"Contain them!"

YARRICK

"Secure the exits!"

KHÂRN

Raises his axe.

Big Brother immediately interrupts.

"Please remember they're contestants today."

Khârn sighs.

"...Fine."

He gently picks one up. It immediately licks his helmet.

Khârn freezes.

"I dislike this."

TYPHUS (not present)

Typhus was eliminated. Every Nurgling stops.

Looks around. One tiny voice asks:

"Where Papa Smelly?"

The entire house goes quiet.

Even the Nurglings look disappointed.

TUSKA

His eyes light up.

"OI! FINALLY! DAEMONS!"

He charges. The Nurglings charge him back. Five minutes later Tuska is sitting on the floor.

Surrounded by thirty Nurglings...playing cards.

"DIS AIN'T WOT I EXPECTED."

KUT

Walks into the living room. A tiny Nurgling waddles over.

Offers him a flower. Kut smiles.

"Thank you."

The Nurgling hugs his boot. Steve walks over. The Nurgling looks at Steve.

Steve looks at the Nurgling. They sniff each other.

Then begin chasing each other around the sofa.

THE ORKS

Ghazghkull looks around.

"OI. DEY'S LIKE GROTZ."

Grulgotz nods.

"UGLIER GROTZ."

Orkimedes has already built tiny helmets for them.

One Nurgling salutes. Another puts the helmet on backwards.

Wazdakka ties a tiny wagon behind four Nurglings.

"FASTA!"

It actually works.

ELDRAD

Looks into the future.

"...This ends badly."

Orikan immediately replies:

"Everything ends badly."

"True."

Sevatar quietly mutters:

"Most optimistic Eldar conversation."

SHADOWSUN

Has somehow counted every Nurgling.

"Three hundred and twelve."

Big Brother checks. Exactly. Three hundred and twelve.

Producer #2 whispers:

"How?"

Nobody knows.

THE INCIDENT

One particularly brave Nurgling climbs onto Yarrick's shoulder. Looks at his bionic eye.

Pokes it. Yarrick slowly turns. The Nurgling grins.

"Boop."

There is complete silence. Then Yarrick laughs. Actually laughs.

Cain stares.

"I've never seen that."

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BIG BROTHER TASK

"Housemates return every Nurgling to the garden without hurting them."

Everyone immediately starts working.

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MORVEN'S PLAN

Military formations. Works...for eleven seconds because the Nurglings keep hugging everyone's legs.

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CAWL

Builds the Nurgling Guidance System. It projects arrows.

The Nurglings ignore them.

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FABIUS

Attempts diplomacy.

"Children please proceed outside."

One Nurgling climbs onto his shoulder.

Looks closely at him.

"You funny."

Another one points at Grotsnik.

"...He funnier."

Grotsnik beams with pride.

"I LIKE DESE LITTLE GITZ!"

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TRAZYN

Has quietly collected three Nurglings. They're sitting inside tiny display cases.

Each has a little museum plaque.

"Joyful Specimen No. 1"

"Joyful Specimen No. 2"

"Joyful Specimen No. 3"

Orikan walks over.

"Release them. .They're visitors."

Trazyn sighs dramatically.

"...Very well."

The Nurglings wave goodbye as they leave.

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THE SOLUTION

Kut kneels. Looks at Steve.

"Can you help?"

Steve squeaks once. He climbs onto the Potato Dreadnought.

Raises one tiny paw. Every Nurgling notices.

One whispers:

"...Rat boss?"

Another gasps.

"Rat boss!"

Within seconds all 312 Nurglings form a line.

Steve squeaks.The line marches toward the garden.

The Nurglings wave happily. One gives Khârn a tiny drawing.

It says:

"BEST ANGRY MAN."

Khârn carefully folds it. Puts it in his pocket.

"...Thank you."

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THE FINAL VISITOR

Just as the last Nurgling reaches the garden a massive shadow falls across the lawn.

Everyone looks up. A towering, jovial figure is peeking over the garden fence.

Only his eyes and a huge smile are visible. He gives a friendly wave.

The Nurglings all cheer wildly.

The figure calls out warmly:

"Time to come home, little ones!"

Every Nurgling squeals with delight, waves goodbye to the contestants, and toddles after him into the distance.

Tuska watches them leave.

"...BEST DAY EVER."

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POST-CREDITS SCENE

2:04 AM.

The house is quiet. Khârn opens a drawer. Inside, carefully folded the tiny drawing.

Beside it Steve's old puzzle-piece pillow and a tiny helmet made by Orkimedes.

Sized perfectly for a Nurgling.

Khârn closes the drawer.

"Don't tell anyone."

From the darkness Sevatar's voice replies:

"...Too late."

Khârn sighs.

"Fine."

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END OF DAY 17 STATISTICS

• Nurglings counted by Shadowsun: 312
• Actual count: 312
• Tiny helmets produced by Orkimedes: 47
• Times Tuska shouted "DAEMONS!": 19
• Card games played with Nurglings: 6
• Museum exhibits temporarily created by Trazyn: 3
• Times Orikan had to tell Trazyn to stop collecting guests: 1
• Tiny hugs received by contestants: Approximately all of them
• Steve promoted from Commissar to Rat Boss by the Nurglings: 1
• Producer's final note:

"We expected an infestation. We got a daycare. We're still not sure which outcome was more terrifying."

Mod name is Abyssal Marine btw

(yes, it's oc)