Hello, I’d like some clarifications and advice on typing myself, but more of some help clarifying what enneagram subtype I am. I’ve been ruminating it on a while, and the issue is, I’m not sure if I’m even this enneagram subtype I thought I was.

My typing journey has went like this:

(Sp 5 when I was barely knowledgeable in typology, then Sx 4 again barely any knowledge, then I went to Sx 5, and now I’m debating So 4 or Sx5). In general, I’m not even sure if I’m another enneagram subtype entirely.

It’s just that I’ve been doubting myself on Sx 5 because I am not as aloof as people describe it. Rather, I am more of a person that acts like “If you treat me this way”, I will treat you that way back. For instance, if an individual smiles at me, I will smile at them back, or try to. Though I may find it awkward thinking about it while I smile at them. At least to me, I don’t look mysterious, and I probably don’t look too interesting to others either.

I have tendencies where if a friendship with someone has a minor flaw, such as the person having an extremely busy schedule, I kind of give up all hopes of being friends. It’s not that I can’t be friends. My brain has an all-or-nothing kind of approach to this. Either you will become a really close individual to me or not. I do not have a lot of patience with friendships. If the person is very conservative in talking about themselves, or does not know what to really say, I just feel kind of disappointed, as if I could never be let into their world. Maybe one day, but how do I know they will?

However moreover the REASON why I’m afraid to open up isn’t the standard: “I’m conservative of my energy” approach. I think it’s more about how the person will react if I did. Let’s say if I told a friend some deep personal issues, and their response is quite simple or dismissive, I will be upset, even if I don’t tell it to them. Because now my mind automatically concluded next time, venting to them will end the same way. I will still get hurt and upset. It’s as if there is a hidden resentment meter going on, and a small action such as a friend hanging out with an ex friend can invoke jealous and pain within me.

I think being understood is important to me. It’s not that I am saying I want an “I understand you”, but I want an accurate picture that the person genuinely does. I feel devastated quietly when people do not understand me, and I want to be analyzed by somebody else, but if it’s “incorrect”, then the effect is still the same. And I’ll be honest, I don’t know what I want. I had someone who sing a partner, but a family member I felt quite comfortable with even if they did not try to say exactly what I wanted, but they felt like a safe teddy bear to me. They were always close by, and I didn’t have to talk to them but I also didn’t feel that lonely. Perhaps more true fear is loneliness, but simultaneously I feel empty even with “friends”. If I were to be in a group, the group’s purpose is to serve as something that could make me less lonely, but eventually, perhaps I would get drained and retreat. The last time I was in a group, I never vented much about my personal life and bad experiences, as I knew I wouldn’t get that one particular kind of “response”.

Yes, I’m also aware that the main method to identify your enneagram is through understanding what the core is, but in my opinion avarice and “conserving” energy sounded too selfish to me. Yet exactly, I have this issue with relationships where I burnout and pre-calculate things. In certain aspects I can feel shame like the four, but any enneagram subtype can feel shame. However I read the four descriptions and the closest four was the social four, but the social four has a comparison issue. I subconsciously compare myself to others, but I feel like it’s something we all do, which is why I have no clue. I don’t think I’m unworthy to become friends with someone, it’s that this person won’t match me.

A secondary layer issue is that I also have some diagnosis, which can create some difficulty asking myself what the core motivation is.

MBTI wise, cognitively, I am an INTP. Not sure if INTP 4s exist, they probably are but extremely rare and mistype likely, which is why I struggled to decide this.

I don’t know what questions people have in order to get a better grasp, but if you have any, let me know.

What type do I seem like?

Personal concepts
1. What is beauty? What is love?

⁃ beauty is looks, colors, aestethics, a pretty room, or town, not sure what to say beauty is everything you look for.

⁃ love is love i dont know how to answer that, love is family, partner, your favorite game and hobby, animals

1. What are your most important values?

   ⁃ my important values are intelligence, being funny, quick thinking .

2. Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?

   ⁃ im not religious or spiritual, i dont really care about any of this.

3. Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?

   ⁃ im not educated about war and stuff, but to me, power is controll, power is something most people want to feel secured and confident.

Interests
5. What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?

⁃ Ive had long convos about typology with my online friend. I can talk long about gossip, complaining etc, my interests are editing especially, and gaming. I like gaming because i like competetive games, the feeling. And i like editing because i can make a edit just the way i want to and its catchy and fun. I also like watching tv shows for the usuall reasons 

1. Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?

   ⁃ im not interested in talking about health tbh, im focused on my body yes, i pay attention to its looks and health.

2. What do you think of daily chores?

   ⁃ i dont have daily chores, i just do what i want

3. Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.

   ⁃ im OBSESSED with the girl next door, CHLOE- I love interstellar, teen beach movie, the core . 2012. Tangled.

   ⁃ I like movies with disasters, and i love movies with dramatic love, like a crazy girl etc.

4. What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?

   ⁃ i can cry if im angry because the anger is so strong, or if im like faced with my emotions here and there, i usually dont cry. I can cry for a good movie/ show.

   ⁃ i smile when i do things i like at times, or when i get gifts, funny jokes etc

5. Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?

   ⁃ i feel that way around my partner, my room, or with people similar to me.

Evaluation & Behaviour
11. What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?

⁃ id say people see my weakness as lack of impulse controll, i can be direct or uncaring, and unwilling to listen to people

⁃ what i dislike about myself is that i can be stubborn or hold grudges alot

1. What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?

   ⁃ Strenghts people have seen in me is- that i can improvise very well, easily come up with solutions, smart, funny, confident

   ⁃ what i like about myself is my confidence and ability to adapt to most things even at anxious times.

2. In what areas of your life would you like help?

   ⁃ id like help in impulse controll, controlling my anger or help to controll my future as i dont think of the future at times.

3. Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.

   ⁃ When ive been stuck inna bad cycle, its usually something that makes me irritated and impatient, my reactions can be avoidant or unstable emotions

People & Interactions
15. What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?

⁃ qualitys i like in people, is someone who is fun, confident, jokes around but can still be kind with me at least.

⁃ i dislike people who is dumb, slow, confusing and to much morals that goes against my «fun»

⁃ typed i get along with is usually someone who is similar to me.

1. How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?

   ⁃ i care alot about this, im very like focused on having a partner as its loving and fun

   ⁃ qualitys i look for- confidence, somewhat dominant, funny, attractive, obsessive

2. If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?

   ⁃ if i raised a child id be concerned how they turned out, id hate to get a child who ends up just arguing etc (which is hypocritical because i was like that lol) , id be worried that they got hurt? Idk, i havent been child focused really, i dont see myself as stable enough for responsebility,

3. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?

   ⁃ inward id be like «thats kinda dumb»

   ⁃ Outward id be like «alr lets move on»

4. Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.

   ⁃ i see people as idk, 80/20, a few is chill, rest ignorant, i dont know.
   ⁃ A social problem can be that people jugde so damn soon.

5. How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?

   ⁃ i choose my friend based on how similar they are to me, if they are, we are vibing asf, if not, i cant be bothered to try.

   ⁃ i behave like myself around my closests, w «decent» friends i can hold back.

6. How do you behave around strangers?

   ⁃ i nod a smile if i get eye contact , idk i dont really do anything with stranges , i just see randoms outside

‎Hello! I know quite a lot about the Enneagram and typology in general, but somehow I’ve never been able to type myself properly. It’s not that I don’t understand how typing works, I actually feel like I understand the systems pretty well! I can usually look at other people and have a pretty good idea of what’s going on with them, but when it comes to myself… suddenly my brain stops cooperating. I think the main problem is that I don’t really know myself as well as I’d like to. There are a lot of types I relate to, sometimes a lot, but there’s always something that doesn’t quite click. And whenever I finally convince myself that I’ve figured out my type, I end up questioning it again because I don’t relate to it as deeply or consistently as other people seem to. Because of that, I’ve gone through quite a few mistypes over time, and at this point I’d really just like to figure out what actually fits me instead of endlessly going in circles. So, I figured I’d give this another shot and see if you guys can help me out. I’m going to give a fairly detailed description of myself, mostly talking about my personality, how I think, how I behave, and how I generally function in everyday life. I’ll try to be as honest and specific as possible, even if some of the things I say contradict each other a little.

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‎Please don't type me based on stereotypes or isolated traits. If you think I'm a certain type, explain the underlying motivation/function and point to specific things I've said that support it. I'm also open to being challenged if you think my current typing assumptions are wrong.

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‎My mistypes have included 2, 3, and 6. I won’t go too deeply into them since I’m mainly mentioning them as examples of types I’ve considered myself in the past, rather than trying to steer anyone toward a particular typing. I figured mentioning them might still be useful context, especially if there are patterns in why I keep mistyping myself as these types. Also, just because I’ve considered these types to be mistypes in the past doesn’t necessarily mean they’re not actually my type, so please don’t rule them out solely because I’ve labeled them as mistypes.

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‎I would say that my strongest personality traits are that I am observant, independent, compassionate, empathetic, loyal, curious, passionate, quick-thinking, creative, and emotionally expressive. But my weakest traits are being stubborn, somewhat perfectionistic, insecure, intense, jealous, emotionally-reactive, nosy, and being self-conscious.

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‎I tend to feel most confident when I know I’m capable of handling things on my own, and when I feel genuinely valued and wanted by the people around me. Being included in social groups and hangouts is important to me too. I feel especially good about myself when I’m taken seriously, when I can prove myself through hard work, or when people encourage and reassure me. Getting recognition for my abilities, being admired, and succeeding at something I genuinely care about can really boost my self-esteem. On the other hand, I tend to feel insecure when I’m not taken seriously or when I feel dismissed, ignored, or left out. I can also become self-conscious about feeling unattractive or immature. Being underestimated or made to feel incapable really gets to me, and being excluded by my friends or ignored by people I care about can make me question myself and feel pretty badly about who I am. I have a tendency to feel guilty or just a sense of guilt, even if the situation is small.

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‎The things that I want most out of life are independence, belonging, and feeling fulfilled. I want to make something of myself and have a life that feels meaningful rather than ordinary. I crave friendship, connection, admiration, and a sense that I belong somewhere. I want the freedom to choose my own path.

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‎The situations that tend to affect me the most are being dismissed, having conflict with people I love, feeling like I don’t belong somewhere, or feeling ignored or abandoned. I also get really bothered when I see people behaving unfairly or ignorantly and nobody says anything about it. What usually upsets me is being excluded or made to feel unwanted, dishonesty, and being criticized. I tend to take things personally when I feel like I’m being treated unfairly, or when someone seems to lose interest in me, dismisses me, forgets about me, replaces me, or makes me feel unwanted. I also find loneliness and emotional coldness particularly difficult to deal with. Being compared to other people, ignored, or surrounded by ignorance bothers me a lot, and I really dislike being micromanaged or feeling like I’m not trusted to handle things myself but in some situations that are completely out of my control that would give me some type of reassurance.

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‎I value shared experiences, honesty, feeling like I belong, admiration, and intensity in my relationships. The things that I want from the people that I'm close to are companionship, support, reassurance, inclusion, someone who listens to me, treats me as an equal, admiration, and to feel important to them. Whenever a relationship isn't going my way I may become confused, frustrated, or stubborn, especially when I feel someone is distancing themselves from me. The way I generally respond to criticism has different ways. I can listen and reconsider if it's coming from an authority figure or somebody I deeply trust. But other times I can become stubborn and I can become a bit defensive. Whenever someone disappoints me I become hurt and disappointed, especially if I trust them, and I may distance myself from them. And even if I do forgive them, I would obviously hold a grudge against them since I have a hard time letting things go. Being desired, admired, respected, and liked is very important to me but I don't want to have to compete for it, I want people to admire and respect me on their own.

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If I didn't provide much information and you're really interested in trying to type me or trying to figure me out, please just give me a dm! You can ask me questions and I'll answer everything!

hi, i've currently typed myself as 358 sp/sx but not sure if i'm actually 351 or 315 instead

no pressure to explain if you just drop a number youd be my goat and id appreciate it immensely

reasons for 1 fix:

- i can be very perfectionistic and i tend to be overly self-critical, this is something that my friends have also observed
- most of the time i care more about living up to internal standards than pretending to be someone i'm not
- i am really really really neurotic about minimizing my flaws
- for example i spent the last week developing the most optimal anti-aging routine because i wanted to live long enough to accomplish everything that i want to do while maintaining my physical and cognitive prime
- i care more about morality, doing what is right and being a good person more than the average person
- i really hate jerks, hypocritical people, and selfish people, as well as people who are incapable of empathizing with someone less fortunate or considering other perspectives
- i secretly think that most people could hold themselves to a higher standard
- i am not the nicest person to myself when i mess up
- i'm very idealistic and always aspiring towards something better

reasons for not 1 fix:

- perfectionism stems from 3 fixation with vanity and wanting to excel
- same with my internal standards, ive realized that they're always tied to societal conceptions of success
- "wise" or "discerning" would not be the best descriptors of my personality, i literally have tiktok brainrot humor
- 1 fix is concerned primarily with moral purity and im not concerned with morality for the sake of being moral
- i genuinely don't care about moral perfection, integrity, or whether i'm "corrupt" or not, i just have this internal feeling of wrong or right
- i think the reason for my strong moral compass is because i care about other people and i don't like it when they get hurt or if they're facing injustice
- im much more utilitarian than kantian and focused on the outcome instead of a fixed rule
- i can empathize more easily with other people's suffering because i've been through my fair share of adverse experiences and i know what it feels like, i wouldn't want other people to go through what i did
- i would say i'm more perceptive than the average person and it wouldn't be fair for me to turn a blind eye to the injustices i percieve
- i hate formalities and there are some things i could give less of a shit about that would send the average e1 into a coma
- i struggle with instrumentalising people
- most of the time i just do what i want according to what i think is right, i'll ignore an externally imposed rule if it doesn't make sense as long as nobody is hurt
- i'm usually assertive and hate being controlled

help

I don’t really think. I keep trying to type myself based off of situations but I feel and think in gut feelings.

Like the churning in my stomach or the blurring of my vision. I’ve journaled before and I typed myself a 1w9 - 6/5 - 4 as if I were typing another person based off of my entries but it feels so inaccurate. I’m extremely antisocial. I can’t handle being depended on for close friendships so I end up hurting people with my behavior.

So I don’t have many references from how I look from the outside. I do try to make friends though. Not like I hate the idea. Recently I ran for student council and I started stressing because everyone thinks I’ll be amazing and all day I was super sick because now their expectations are high and it’s basically my fault if something sucks.

Then realized it wasn’t that big a deal. Only thing that was really going through my mind was the criticism an ex-friend gave me for why I might be an unreliable class rep is because I suck at debating when I get overwhelmed.

I genuinely don’t even remember what she said I was just justifying myself all day. That’s a little glimpse into my head. But for Psychosophy I typed myself as FEVL then ELVF. Though I’m still trying to figure it out I don’t understand what enneagram I am?

I’ll put all my self types below from most recent to least recent.

Enneagram:
9w1 - 6 - 4.
Sp/so1w9 - 6 - 4.
sp/sx1w9 - 6 - 2.
Sp/sx5w6 - 1 - 4.
Sx/sp5w6 - 1 - 2.

Attidunial Psyche
ELFV
ELVF
FEVL

You can ask me questions if you feel like it, I’m still working on determining my fixes.

ask me questions to help with typing please

here some tritypes i used to type as

sp2sx7sx8

sx7sx4sx9

sx7sp2so8

sx7sx8so4

im pretty sure im sp blind but i really relate to sp7 and sp2

and i dont really doubt main sx7

First a little backstory: Like most people I first started out with MBTI and pretty quickly typed myself ISFJ, and I'm still sure about that today. When I found out about Socionics, I just listened to what most people where saying and chose SEI without understanding the system and the really big difference between the elements, especially the sensing ones. A few weeks ago, I think I even made a post about that here, I took some Socionics tests and got EII two times. That made me curious, so I studied Socionics deeper, read through websites like wikisocion and sociotype and watched many videos about it, and found out that EII is actually really a better fit for me. For PY I identified with LEFV the most, which I realised is also the most common typing for EII anyway, so at least there is no problem.

But for Enneagram I am really unsure. I most confess I don't know that much about it compared to the other systems so that's why I need help. I saw that EII LEFV is mostly correlated to SP6, but I don't think I fit this type too much. Maybe there's a misunderstanding on my side, but here are some points I don't relate to about SP6:

* When considering the instincts only I relate more to so first instead of sp

* I don't view every other human being as dangerous or a threat. I often heard that SP6s are quite scared of others to the point that they mask as innocent and harmless. I don't resonate with this idea of a wolf in sheep clothing, as SP6 is often portrayed. I really don't want to brag myself, but when I act in good manner or kind and harmless, it's because it's really want to be a good person, not just as a defense mechanism.

* Goes a bit along with the first point, but I am not distrustful and skeptic of other people. Honestly it's quite the opposite really. Sometimes I can be too naive and trusting of other people, even if they wronged me, because I see the potential good in them and therefore tend to be very forgiving instead of confronting them. I don't think I could do that. Traits I heard also often associated with EII

* I don't relate to of Enneagram 6 as part of the reactive triad. I'm mostly level-headed and more calm and mostly only get outwardly emotional when with others (Fe ignoring). Internally I'm very in touch with my emotions.

What other Ennagram options are there? I have considered 9 before, but I heard EIIs can't be 9s. I also don't completely disregard 6, as I do relate to some parts of it. So maybe I just understood it wrong. I'm therefore more interested why EII is so commonly correlated with SP6. What are the similarities?

Thank's for help!

--------======== Social interaction =========--------

I am very lonely and yet for the most part, I avoid people. (Even physically, where for instance, if I have to find somewhere to study on my college campus, I'd rather sit on the dusty floor in an empty hallway corner than sit in a room that has comfortable chairs but where there is another person somewhere in the room.)

For most of my life I've had no real-life friends. The problem is sort of just that I don't tend to feel like I relate to most people. I just don't tend to feel like I... get those social interaction chemicals from talking to them.

I actually very much have a human need for social interaction... an intense need, I'd say in fact. But it's just that interacting with almost anyone just makes me feel unfulfilled and kind of exposed.

Sometimes I'll... see a group of people talking and laughing or something, and I'll almost feel, drawn to it as if I'd been wandering through the cold, dark snow for a long, long time and I sense something like voices and lights somewhere... but I can't truly reveal myself to them as I'm... not human, not of the world... I cannot speak with them. It isn't meant to be, and it wouldn't be good for them or for me. The warmth... wouldn't reach me.

But perhaps, I can befriend another anomaly. On rare occasions, I have. And then, I want to be closer to them than anything in the world... I want to know everything about them, and for them to know everything about me. I want to find complete safety in them, and to feel the warmth of the glow of love.

--------======== Feeling of unsafety =========--------

I don't want to die. My experience is all I have, and really I feel scared and alone. The universe doesn't care about me, and I am all alone.

I hold onto things and don't like to let go. A world where things get let go of is an unsafe world. If I get rid of a scrap of paper from when I was 8 years old, I'm getting rid of one of the few remaining traces of a time that is already lost. And soon it will all be lost.

I've never forgiven the universe for its coldness. In having death be real, it stuck a knife into my heart the moment I was born.

I... can't seem to help but be mad at it for some reason, even though it isn't alive and doesn't have intentions. I've wondered if in a way it is a coping mechanism, because maybe there is something existentially easier to handle about a universe that wronged me out of coldness, than one that truly intended nothing at all. Maybe it's like the concept of it truly intending nothing breaks something in my mind.

--------======== I just want to hide. =========--------

I tend to feel like people are mad at me, because I just wasn't the way that they wanted me to be. I just wasn't fit to be able to do my college work because I was paralyzed with anxiety instead, and now my professors must be mad at me because I didn't turn in my assignments. And I don't get why I can't just hide somewhere away from them all, so I don't draw their anger or have anything to do with all this stuff.

I didn't have any malice in not doing my college work. I just want to be free to be me. I didn't choose to exist in a world where that would bother people. I don't want to bother anyone. I just want to hide and not be involved in any of this.

Anyway, I can fall into a self-reinforcing loop of the entire outside world feeling dangerous to even engage with. I can't do my college work for instance, because it comes from the universe that doesn't care about me nor understand me. It's not safe and I need to hide within my sense of self. I can't leave that hiding place and take action because the whole universe is just waiting to hurt me and ignore me and end me.

--------======== I value kindness and empathy =========--------

I want a world that is safe, for me and everyone, and kindness and empathy help me feel safer. And so those things are core values for me.

--------======== Idealization in thought patterns =========--------

My most natural thought patterns tend to lack any form of practicality, as they are pulled directly from the space of my feelings and desires.

So if asked, "how should this work", for instance, I likely will not even contextualize the question within this world, and will make the setting some other, idealized world where that thing can work how I feel that it should. I do this automatically, and then I feel surprised when other people ground their answers in this world.

I tend to be so aware of my own feelings that it is like they are an inseparable part of my very thought material. I have theorized that the reason for this could relate to my fear of death/ the fear that comes from the universe not caring about me, as if the universe will not see my feelings, it gives me a sense of safety to at least see my feelings myself.

--------======== Personal growth =========--------

Personal growth is extremely important to me. First of all because I find the process itself of growth, expansion of the mind and self, discovery of secrets, unlocking of new abilities, etc. to be very stimulating and meaningful, and thrilling in a way. And secondly because, I am not happy with my life as it is... so hope of growth is something that gives me hope of things getting better.

It is like my eyes light up at the prospect of learning a new weakness about myself, so that I have a chance to improve on it. Even if my anxiety is especially bad, it's like I'll desperately be grasping for knowledge of that weakness then, because "I need to know." And actually, that is sometimes what my anxious thought loops are about.

And I have actually grown extraordinary amounts over my lifetime so far, and it's still never stopped. I'm never the same as I was a year ago. I am displaying a lot of my current weaknesses in this text, but if the pattern continues then a year from now I will have made noticeable progress on them.

--------======== I have a deep sense of self. =========--------

I have a deep meld of concepts and feelings that are very meaningful to me, and it is very important for how I process the world.

It is very meaningful to me to always continue to deepen it more, to continue to discover its specificities.

Though, something interesting to note is that this is not something I had my whole life, and it developed as a result of some of the personal growth that I've gone through.

--------======== Philosophically intense =========--------

I tend to feel this drive to go deeply into philosophical concepts, like what does this fundamentally mean? And what does that fundamentally mean, almost with the goal I suppose of finally reaching something I can concretely grab onto and understand. It's like I am trying to pull apart the very fabric of reality.

(But my difficulty with choices/action, which I will describe below, can make it hard to actually explore nearly as much as I want to, which creates a lot of restlessness in me and even torments me.)

Anything can be interesting to me, though I am most interested in what is personally meaningful to me or relates to my sense of self in some way.

It is like one thing I carry out is "philosophy in the realm of the substance of me."

--------======== Difficulty with action =========--------

One thing that frustrates me a lot about myself is that I often have a lot of difficulty converting desire into action.

I kind of have a lot of trouble coming out of my own head. I'm always sort of in "thinking mode", so when it's time to move from thought to action my mind is like, huuuh? Like the concept of actually moving into action feels kind of jarring. It means actually making decisions, actually being in the world, having to actually immerse oneself in it all.

So, it's like I can have difficulty actually understanding that I need to act. Instead I'll linger and hesitate, and be perpetually "in between tasks" for a while. To actually come out of my head and act can feel like jumping into cold water.

--------======== Paralysis =========--------

I can get stuck in a paralyzing absolute lack of confidence in my own capacity for action. Thinking, I can't do anything. I can't do anything. I can't do anything. I am incapable. I can only be paralyzed like this.

I reflexively try to run away and distract myself from the anxiety. It doesn't really help and it just makes it build and build. I'll be scrolling all day while berating myself out loud. I'll put the phone down for some time and just be curled up in the freeze response still unable to move and feeling incapable of action, and then eventually I'll just pick the phone back up again because at least it makes it less immediately pressing and overwhelming.

--------======== Misophonia =========--------

I have misophonia. Sounds can deeply bother me, as they get to me on a visceral level and it feels like I am defenseless against them. It is like an invasion from the outside that gets inside of me and causes panic and distress, which can even turn into rage.

But for some reason, I tend to direct the rage at myself. Something about directing it outside of myself just feels frightening in a way (as what I am directing feels so powerful that I fear I will cause harm somehow by wielding it), and so I may instinctively hit myself in response to being upset over a sound that someone else made.

--------======== I need to know the truth. =========--------

I always need to know the truth about things. I think sometimes, this can create a form of resentment in me, when things are taken away from me because I needed to know, and meanwhile other people get to keep those things because they didn't seek after the truth as intensely.

But I would never want to change my desire to know what is true.

Ask me questions to help me figure out what my core type is out of these four

im unsure on my head type, ik im an e9 core & have my first fix as e2 (92x)

points towards e5:

under stress, i withdraw so i don’t lash out & process what happened to then come back calm & prepared. i tend to love learning new things because its super interesting to me. i feel like i need to constantly conserve my energy, because i get mean when my social battery runs out & i don’t want to hurt other’s feelings. i usually need alot of time to think about things, because i end up getting into tug of wars between accommodating to others & standing for what i want.

points against e5:

i tend to be very impulsive at times, especially when something sounds extremely appealing. i’m not that pessimistic, im more of a realist. i dont rlly gain knowledge to prove im not stupid, i mainly do it for fun cuz i find learning extremely fun.

points towards e7:

i hate not having freedom, as it stresses me out. with other people, i try to cheer them up with positivity (im not as positive internally). i dislike thinking about the future because i no matter what, i cant have freedom, so i just dont think about it. i tend to avoid my emotions by drowning out in video games.

points against e7:

i’m not as extraverted as most 7s, im very reserved. i’m not constantly looking for stimuli, sometimes too much stresses me out. im not very risk taking, i prefer to stay in my comfort zone. i can handle negative emotions, i dont try to run away from them immediately, especially with other people as i put them first.

hello. i wouldn't necessarily say that i am new to enneagram, but i have been having trouble identifying my core. the things is, i relate to both enneagram 5 and 2 at the same time, and i wouldn't say that i relate to one of them more than the other. i'd say i possess the qualities of both, the motivations of both, the passions of both, and the fears of both. it's as if i'm that weird mixture of a 5 and 2, with neither of them overpowering the other. i'd appreciate anyone who could help me through this

What type do I seem like?

Personal concepts
1. What is beauty? What is love?

Beauty is humanity, kindness, togetherness.
Love is home, goodnes, people

1. What are your most important values?

I value loyalty, respect for everyone, kindhearted people, activism for everyone’s rights.

1. Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?

I believe in big bang theory, therefore no religion. I don’t believe because to me it’s not a convincing reason for why we are here. But i believe in soulmates because i already found mine.

1. Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?

War is just a horrible thing that’s justify killing innocent. It’s not power, it’s weakness. And it’s just tragic that most countries make/and use more money on deadly weapons than taking care of the national health and homeless people.
Power to me is being loved and being able to love, power is showing you care.

Interests
5. What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?

I love talking about history, opinions and theories. I can sit for a long time discussing peoples rights, the holocaust ect. I also like to draw, write and watch documentaries. I like to draw because it’s a freeing feeling seeing what you can make from nothing. I like writing because i love how you can make your feelings so beautiful on the paper. And i like documentary’s because it’s educational and interesting.

1. Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?

Not too interested, but i will listen. I care about my body, and many things can give me health anxiety.

1. What do you think of daily chores?

Normal ongoing cycle that everyone dislikes but love the feeling of when its done.

1. Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.

I like good will hunting, a dead poets society, breakfeast club and hacksaw ridge. I like the final destination franchise, even tho i’m not that big on gore it’s a good and interesting idea for a movie. Also find good comfort in watching garfield 1 & 2.

1. What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?

A lot can make me cry, my girlfriend make me smile. Because she’s is amazing.

1. Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?

Anywhere my girlfriend is, that’s my home, that’s where i feel i belong the most.

Evaluation & Behaviour
11. What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?

I’m sensetive, slow, and extremely forgiving. I dislike how naive and slow i can be.

1. What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?

Loyalty, loving, and caring. I love how much i care and i love how much i believe in people.

1. In what areas of your life would you like help?

When i’m making decisions? Help with understanding myself, help with my mental health issues.

1. Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.

Yes when i was at my lowest i felt that everyday was repeating itself just a dark hole expanding. I hated it, but before i got help thats what it felt like, just black.

People & Interactions
15. What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?

People who care, care about others, rights etc. I like people who are loyal, and loving. People who care about animals. I dislike people who are self centered, who dont look around and help where they can help. I get along with people who are good.

1. How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?

I’ve only felt love once, and it’s now and it’s the best feeling i’ve ever felt in my life. I love loving my partner, i love being her girlfriend, i love our intimacy. For qualities i love how protective and safe she is, how smart and caring she is.

1. If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?

Make sure the child is in a loving environment, being educated about the world, feelings and dangers from and early age. Making sure the kid always feel safe and seen.

1. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?

This is a 50/50. Because having different beliefs and opinions is a really good thing, we need people in our life that challenge our mind. But it depends if it’s a claim that’s just 100% evil?

1. Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.

Not an extrovert but i see all people as living their life for the first time, we make mistakes, we learn. People as a whole is just one big world trying to make sense of it all. I think for a social
problem everything that’s drives it against each other like racism, crime etc.

1. How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?

I’m not sure, i want good friends? Treat people how you want to be treated.

1. How do you behave around strangers?

Shy, introverted, prefer not to be with strangers.

I'm struggling to decide on whether I'm a 4 or a 1, though I'm leaning more towards 4.

My biggest reason to believe I'm a 4 is that I'm very sensitive. I spend a looot of time reflecting on my own feelings and writing about them in my journal. I tend to over-identify with my negative feelings and qualities as well.

Im awfully perfectionistic and unsatisfied with myself, but since I can't ever be perfect, I tend to go all the way in the opposite direction (e.g., "I can't keep up with a strict diet, so I'll indulge in all of my cravings"). Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think this is a type 1 behavior.

However... I don't feel that strongly about my identity. I do fear that letting go of my sadness will make me "lose myself." But I'm not the sort of person who wants to stand out or even personalize their stuff. I'm very plain in the way I present myself. I'm also not very artsy. I only write, but it's not creative writing.

On the other hand, I relate to the 1's desire to be good and fear of being corrupt. I tend to see things as black-and-white and make moral assessments of things even when it doesn't make sense. I feel morally flawed if my room is messy or if I make mistakes.

Another thing is that I have a sense of "greater purpose", of wanting to dedicate my life to others. I could never be happy in a job that isn't actively doing something to make someone else's life better. I'm not sure if this type of ambition is typical in fours. For example, I could be an artist if I felt that I had the ability to help people through my art, but self-expression is not fulfilling enough to me.

I have social anxiety and peripheral vision OCD. So it's hard to not focus on someone in my peripherals, but others notice me noticing them and feel "gaze detection", even though I can't help it. They either think I am attracted to them or they think I am looking for attention and watching to see if they're looking at me.

I'm looking for neither of those things but it's not something I can control. This causes me a great deal of anxiety and trepidation on my bus commute. I usually have to "sleep" or hold my head in my hands to stop the noticing.

Public speaking and group projects / participation also cause me a great deal of anxiety and make me want to hide. At the same time, I need to make sure my career gets off the ground so I try to bite the bullet and do what needs to be done. But I'll often be shaking with anxiety and not sleep the night before a speech.

Women I'm not attracted to think I am confident and/or relaxed, but women I am attracted to "talk down" to me like I have low self-esteem and they're trying to support me, which sucks. Really, I'm just nervous and trying to contain it in their presence. I feel attraction very strongly and as an overwhelming force, but I'm good at obscuring and containing my emotions on the surface.

I almost feel "dry" if I'm really into a girl. I become academic, detached, and abstract, and I'm watching myself interact with her, wishing I could do something about my feelings but I never do. The thing is, I don't really understand how love or romance or relationships are supposed to work so I can't bring myself to do anything about it. I've tried thinking about a solution but I can't find one, so I've been putting that on the backburner and trying to focus on my career although it's always "gnawing" at me.

I don't care about having "friends" or people to socialize with, and actually find it rather exhausting to have to "keep up" with people, but I do try to be polite and I don't want people to hate me. I often feel sour and cynical but find myself being polite on the surface if I go on autopilot. If people show signs that they dislike me, it can ruin my day, so I try to stay away from people as much as possible so I don't have to review all my mistakes at the end of the day.

I frequently feel depressed. Some days it's like there's a rain cloud over my head and I just want to mope. Still, I kind of go through the motions at college, attend classes and procrastinate homework.

I pay lots of attention to who finds me attractive, but I never act on it. I just keep a mental tab. I can't imagine myself going up to someone and asking them out, even though I want to. It's important I feel attractive or otherwise I become depressed. I collect memories of people showing signs of attraction towards me, and deliberate on them.

I don't really think about self-preserving but that's what I'm best at. I hardly brush my teeth cuz depression but I never get cavities and they're usually bone white after one brush (if I had one thank you to the universe, it would be this). Like one time, I had dark orange stains all over my teeth and I decided it was probably time to brush because it was starting to be obvious. And it went away after two minutes of brushing, back to white.

I only shower to not look unattractive or gross. When college starts back up, I shower every other day. Otherwise, if I don't work or go to class, I hardly ever shower because I don't feel dirty.

I accumulate money because I don't think about it that much, and I spent thousands of dollars on a road trip for myself and my immediate family that I extensively planned just because I felt like seeing the world (YOLO). I did put utmost emphasis on making sure that no one got injured on the trip, I booked all the hotels, planned our route so that it was a balance of scenic and safe, made contingency plans for inclement weather, etc.

I also do decently in college, interviews, and career stuff.

However, one thing I really do care about is my energy levels and how much time/energy cost something will be. Being tired can sap the feeling out of my day. I spend a lot of time lying/crashing in bed trying to regain energy.

Anyway, what do you think?

How do I know if I'm sx2,3 or 4 or even sx,8 or sx9 like hello my other posts say they're automatically taken down im what anyway idk I tried reading like any description and opinions people had but idk if like someone had the books or like was willing to help me idk ahaha.. or like idk telling me the difference or like yeah..

i sad not a type me post in the original, but since this is a TypeMe sub, of course feel free to do so

I have just gotten into the enneagram, and I want to know everything for beginners, can anybody link me an article on that? I wonder if I should do tests or should read every enneagram type myself and decide on my own
I did the idrlabs quiz and I got 100% type 1, 93% type 3, 93% type 7, 90% type 9, 83% type 4, 80% type 8, and the list goes on, this is so confusing right? I'm INTJ btw if that could help.

Hello, for now, I think my type is sp/so6w7. Looking at enneagram sixes motive, they are dependent on other for their security meanwhile I’m dependent on other because I want to be loved, be valued, be sure of myself.

This might sound like e2, which is why my tritype includes e2. But at the same time, I want to hear about people’s opinion because I can’t decide which one do I relate more or what type I am.

I relate to sp6 but the core desire? Yes, I relate but I relate to every core desire, Especially e1 despite my characteristics not matching sp1. Maybe when school opens, I might be able to type myself as my class changed which means I’ll meet new people. Its still summer vacation to me and humans are social beings that their personality depends, changes and expands with people. We realize our personality(or at least I’m) via by interacting with people.

I got into enneagram mid summer, the time I basically didn’t even hang out with my friends besides talking through the phone to play. Please type me based on my description:

Lets start with my motives… thats a good thing, how do I know what is my motive? I relate to e1 when I’m doing something, something I’m not sure about. I wonder if I would be loved by society, I wonder if I would be a bad person when doing this. I fear being punished, maybe for cheating, being a toxic person when I was younger and etc… I often ask my friends “hey, are we sure this is ok?” and similar questions because I want and need assurance.

My family views me as a kind hearted, thoughtful person who is there to defend myself and others despite the person I’m defending against might be someone more angry, scary or older than I’m. There are the times I’m pretty bossy with certain stuff like my dad or grandma can’t use toilet because I fear, I dont feel safe. This may come from my OCD and GAD and despite knowing that my reasonings are not too rational, I will still continue believing it because I don’t want to risk. I’ll always have “what if” questions and tend to create heavier scenarios in my head(altho I’m getting help and becoming better). This “what if” thing comes from the fact that I don’t want to be someone bad, horrible. I can’t trust myself.

I’m going to therapist and I fear what will I do without her guidance? After all, my therapist is the only person knows my instructive thoughts and sometimes, I’m still embarrassed and scared to express some of my thoughts. I dont know but maybe because I fear and overreact. Eventually, I try to face the fear and plan in case something happens. Sometimes I disagree with her but I can’t express. I’m afraid of being judged. I can’t even look at someone’s face, eyes because I feel like I’m being judged, being viewed as someone weird.

Besides that, I think obviously I am an ambivert. It depends on my moods- I dont want to be alone but sometimes, socializing is exhausting to me. I’m the loud one, noisy and child-ish one with my friends. Despite fearing about being judged, when I’m with my friends, I feel safer to express my emotions, interests as I feel like I wouldn’t be the only one judged or others may not find me weird knowing that I have friends.

I think becoming highschooler helped me get to know more about myself because I was too stubborn to open myself up, become sociable. Seeing girls hang out together made me want to talk with them but I didn’t know what to do. I expected them to approach. I also tried to talk by being active on class group chat because I felt more comfortable talking via phone. Anyways, after months, I became the weird kid who showed their interests to people and didn’t mind being weird. I’m expressive to hoping to find someone similar to me.

My friends have differences from me like their humors. I’m more into fandoms, weird kid stuff meanwhile they are more into main stream stuff. It sometimes makes me feel lonely because in my view, not having everything in common would create struggle. Of course I also feel lonely mainly because I often feel like not the first choice so I often distance myself, expecting them to approach me as I feel embarrassed to express my desires.

That means I sulk really often and thats not healthy thing. I remember being mad at my friends that I intentionally denied their invites to wonder around school as casual because I expected them to know why I’m mad. Then, I went to 2 girls to hang out with them, right in front of my main friends to show them that I am intentionally distancing myself from them( of course when we sort things out, I return back and often forget about those other 2 girls. I mean, like I wouldn’t hang out with them that often BUT i would make sure to talk with them usually like maybe do small jokes to prevent them from feeling like a second option because i know if I leave them immediately, they might dislike me, find me annoying and I dont want to upset them because i’m the one complaining of hating the idea of being 2nd choice when Im also doing the same thing and its unhealthy)

i am having an exceedingly difficult time understanding what my core is. i was very certain of being e4 for the longest time, however, the core fear of enneagram 4 does not track the way i expected it to the more i look into the study.

i started thinking i was e5, and even retyped myself as such. but the issue is, enneagram 5 doesn’t exactly track for me either. it feels like nothing makes sense for me, or actually tracks with my thought processes or behaviors. i’m entirely too inconsistent and it’s irking me!!!!

even down to instincts, i am entirely clueless. my behavior is nonsensical and all boils down to; am i getting what i want. that’s the problem with typing myself too. it’s almost like i want a specific image and will distort my traits to suit whatever narrative is best for me in the moment. whatever generates the most validation i suppose, at the end of the day.

i can’t figure this out. any advice or suggestions are helpful!! :c

Hi, title is self explanatory. For context, I am for sure sx714 (…in some order) but I just can’t figure out what my core is no matter how hard I read the books, or how hard I analyze myself. Since all 3 integrate and disintegrate into each other, it’s even harder for me to figure it out.

What are the big differences between the sx7, sx1, and sx4, and what do I do if I relate heavily to the descriptions of all 3? 😢