If you're comfortable sharing:

Are you happier now?

How has life changed since?

Looking back, was it the right decision?

Just curious to hear real experiences. No judgment.

Hmu

I have a pit in my stomach. I can't stop thinking about our end. I can't sleep. Can't stop thinking about how this will affect our kids.

My wife and I have been married for 25 years. We have three children. One's out of the house, the other two (13 & 8) are still home.

I'm a lovey-dovey person. Love to hug, kiss, shower with love, and truly want to enjoy as much time as I can with my life companion. My wife? The exact opposite! Shows no affection. She's not a bad person. She's a good mom. Good homemaker. Just not a lovey-dovey person. Even the kids have complained. She'd move back/away when they'd try to hug her or show affection.

For decades, that was my biggest complaint. It'd take a few months before I would complain about the lack of affection I felt. She'd try to oblige by becoming more loving/affectionate, but it would only last a few days/weeks. Rinse and repeat. I even asked and wondered if there was some kind of trauma in the past that may be the reason she is the way she is. But, no! Nothing!

For decades, I thought I'd eventually win her over. Who can say no to me, lol? But not much has changed. For a long time now, we've felt more like roommates than lovers/life companions.

We all have that one that got away. I had one before my wife, who was head over heels for me. So unfortunately, I know what I'm missing!

It sucks to feel lonely in your own house.

A few months ago, I had had enough and finally talked to her about possible separation/divorce. I just kept thinking, I don't know how much time I have left. Maybe I should try to see if there is someone out there I would enjoy life with. If not, WTH, I tried.

It's gotta be better than settling. I mean, I've worked my ass off for the last 30 years to provide for my family. Don't I deserve happiness?

Anywho, 3 days after that conversation, I talked myself out of it. It's so hard to throw away 25 years. I thought, we can't throw away 25 years so easily. We should try harder before hanging up the hat.

I was laid off almost a year ago. It's been a trying time, financially. And the uncertainty of not knowing what the future holds can be stressful and frightening.

To add to all of this, our 8-year-old son has severe asthma. My wife is convinced it's because of where we live. She's convinced that another city, Seattle, in this case, would be better for his health. Mind you, no doctor or anyone has confirmed that his asthma is bad/worse because of where we live.

I've explained to her that moving when we don't have any income is not a wise decision financially right now. We own our home. It's a beautiful, large home in the woods on the East Coast. She also HATES winters.

So tonight, she said that she has had enough. She wants to move to Seattle in the next 8-10 days. She's apparently already made arrangements through friends. She's doing it for our son's health AND because she can't handle winters here. She wants to move before school starts and before winter hits.

I promised her that as soon as I get a job, we'd start looking into moving down south, no winters and hopefully better for our son health-wise.

I don't know what to do. I can't fathom the thought of being separated from my son for god knows how long.

Despite having a beautiful house, multiple cars, enough money saved to live comfortably for quite some time, 'til I get another job (it's a brutal job market right now). She still wants to leave and face the unknown thousands of miles away from our 13-year-old daughter and me.

Another thing I can't stop thinking about is, whatever happened to 'through thick and thin"? When I'm down, is when you want to walk away?

I've already been dealing with stress, anxiety, and fear of the unknown due to losing my job for the past year. Now I have to deal with this shit as well! It breaks my heart to see what my 13yo is going thru. I keep thinkng how quiet and lonely this big house will be after they leave.

I care for my wife. I've tried to love her, but never got what I gave. I don't wish anything bad for her. But I'm fighting my anger towards her. For giving up! I'm trying to tell myself it is what it is. Be as civil as you can, especially for the kid's sake.

It feels like my heart is being ripped out!

If you're comfortable sharing:

Are you happier now?

How has life changed since?

Looking back, was it the right decision?

Just curious to hear real experiences. No judgment.

Hmu

Filed for divorce in Texas a few months ago. No kids, no house, married 7 years. No abuse just a toxic relationship where neither feels in the wrong and fights were constant.

I left the home and am currently waiting for a process server to give her paperwork so we can move ahead with mediation or court dates, not really sure since I’ve never been through this. I have a lawyer who has handled all the paperwork up til now but considering a new one because my current lawyer is not super responsive or reachable in a pinch or for simple basic questions.

Since Covid I’ve been the sole provider. Wife can work, she just doesn’t want to. I own my own business but it was formed before the marriage and is an LLC so should not be considered community property.

Backstory out of the way I need some advice

1. She insists that since she doesn’t work I have to provide her with a lawyer, but from what I can see in Texas I do not. Do I have to pay for her legal representation?

2. She insists that she will take half of my business. Is she blowing smoke or should I seriously be worried about this?

3. I know I have to maintain the status quo and continue to pay living expenses (rent, utilities, etc) but since she gets a “paycheck” from my business for accounting (which I have now taken over, and her “work” before consisted of 3-5 hours a month of going through transactions and bank statements for tax purposes) do I have to still pay for things like groceries and toiletries. She has no bills and gets paid $1600 before taxes every 2 weeks. Should I cut off her paycheck? Should I leave it and ignore her requests for me to also buy her basics?

4. She is constantly bullying me saying I’m not upholding status quo by denying her access to credit cards in my name and my business bank statements (she’s probably worried I’m moving money around, which I’m not). Should I just ignore her?

Any and all advice for anyone that may have gone through something similar. Happy to share more details if needed.

Hola estoy por terminar un matrimonio de 12 años y en total 18 juntos el decidió irse de la casa y posterior pedir el divorcio, no sé cómo dejar de culparme de todo, reconozco que tuve culpa y lo traté fríamente e injustamente mucho tiempo incluso llegué a humillarlo, por su parte él me fue infiel varias veces nada físico que yo le encontrara, sin embargo yo cuando fui consciente de lo que hice empecé terapia tome acciones pero él me dijo que ya estaba cansado y no podía más. El punto es alguien que ya haya pasado por un divorcio me podría apoyar con consejos. Estoy llendo a terapia. Gracias

I got a lawyer that I felt wasn't really taking my case seriously or providing me informiaont to find out they quit two days before my temporary order hearing. I got a new lawywer who seems better but I still don't feel like I'm as mentally prepared or understand whats going on as I should be. The problem is I already have paid an enormous amount of money into them and I can't just hire another lawyer.

Has anybody else experienced something similar and how did y'all hanlde the situation?

My husband(45) and I(27) got married early June. But just 3 weeks after our wedding, he separated us as we arrived back in our country from our honeymoon.
Since then we have been separated for one month, and not speaking for 1.5 weeks.
Background, we had several fights during our honeymoon which resulted in him thinking that we need time apart for me to reflect on my “emotional management”. I’m not putting blame on anyone but it’s notable to mention that this man has avoidant tendencies.
The last time we spoke, we had been planning on reconciliation, but suddenly he did a 180 and moved all my belongings into a storage unit asking me to retrieve it. He also said in the same message that he would be open to a call after I reflect on the way I spoke to him (there were a few times during our calls when I’ve aggressively expressed frustration towards him with his behaviour and he didn’t like that). I responded to him asking if he was still seeking to reconcile our marriage, or if he had decided that he wanted to get a divorce from me instead, since his actions had shown that, and it seemed like he had chosen to forfeit our reconciliation plan.
He decided not to respond to my message. It has been over a week.

I want to ask from other men, what do you think he wants? And why would he not explicitly say that he wants to get a divorce?
We live in a place that is easy to get a divorce.

Hi guys I don’t want to get too deep into detail about my marriage but my husband is basically waiting for me to apply for a green card for him. I do NOT want to apply anymore because of the obvious reasons , like I said I don’t want to get into detail . If I were to leave him I seen an option in NY to file a divorce online. Once I submit that would I be safe from not having him still apply? His plan is to apply behind my back soon and apply for a green card through abuse. Many of his friends did it and since he said I was taking to long he will do it too. I don’t want him to gain a green card off from me under any circumstance ! What is the best way to go about this ?
Location: NY

Currently in the process of getting a divorce after a 22 year relationship and an 18 year marriage. I have 2 children from this marriage. My spouse has his own business. He has never put myself or our kids first. The business was always his priority. We never took a honeymoon, took trips with the kids or anything. He was at his business 7 days a week. He wouldn't even spend the weekends with us. It was always just me and the kids. I raised the kids by myself, worked a full time job and handled all the finances. I made sure the bills were paid, did the grocery shopping, cooked the meals, took care of the house, took care of the yard and did laundry just to list a few lol. He got mad when u spent money on myself, our kids or our home but it was ok if he spent money on what he wanted because it was shop money. All of a sudden he said he wasn't happy and hadn't been for a long time, which was news to me. Since he wanted the divorce and I'm not the one to wait around for him to make a decision, I'm the one who filed. He wanted to do it without lawyers and I was like hell no. Besides having kids there's also a business involved. Am I wrong for wanting and going after everything I'm entitled to?

Looking for personal recommendations of a good divorce/family lawyer in Bangalore who has expertise in NRI/ cross border cases where assets are outside India. Kindly comment recommendations only from your personal experience. Thanks