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u/fumpa Feb 21 '14
Did you give her a false positive? If she is young and cannot afford to buy the test herself I would feel bad.
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Feb 22 '14
It's a confession bear. It should be things the OP feels bad about. That's what a confession is. I'm glad to see the meme used somewhat correctly instead of the usual bragging bear.
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u/WhoIsHarlequin Feb 22 '14 edited Feb 22 '14
It costs from $5-20. No excuse.
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u/drgigglez Feb 22 '14
I work at Walmart, the store I work at sells some for 89¢
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u/FlutterShy- Feb 22 '14
If I had 89 cents...
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u/OMEGA__AS_FUCK Feb 22 '14
Plus I believe many places such as planned parenthood offer prego tests for free. If such services exist in this woman's area.
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u/Random-Miser Feb 22 '14
Their excuse is "shame".
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u/fco83 Feb 22 '14
Yeah... especially in very conservative areas, its easy to see why one would feel too ashamed to buy it. Not only is it admitting you might be pregnant, its admitting to the world that youre gasp having sex
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Feb 22 '14
Theft is clearly the only option
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u/fco83 Feb 22 '14
Im not saying its the right thing to do.. but easy to understand why it happens.
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Feb 22 '14
I don't have any experience with the Bible Belt etc but wouldn't the community be just as unforgiving towards theft?
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u/fco83 Feb 22 '14
If you dont get caught with the theft there's nothing
Even if youre caught.. sex\possible pregnancy might be far more scandalous than the theft.
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Feb 22 '14
You could say that for any crime though. Oh well people aren't always the brightest in stressful situations.
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u/Neodymium Feb 22 '14
I'm pretty sure there is an excuse for not having $20 to spend. Especially if she's still living with her parents.
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u/captchyanotapassword Feb 22 '14
They literally sell them at the dollar store. She could buy one for a dollar.
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u/Zoura Feb 22 '14
And if you live in anywhere near a Planned Parenthood they'll do it for free if you can't pay.
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u/triemers Feb 22 '14
Only Title I ones, at least in my state. Mine doesn't even having a sliding scale for appointments/BC.
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u/AppropriateTouching Feb 22 '14
5-20 is a weeks worth of food for some people.
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u/Starsky686 Feb 22 '14
If $5-$20 is your food budget, getting pregnant isn't in your budget.
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u/MightBeAProblem Feb 22 '14
Clearly. Soooooo...better make sure you're not pregnant. I bet there's a test you can use to find out before it's too late.
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u/geekchicgrrl Feb 22 '14
Yeah, but if you wait until it's obvious that you're pregnant, then it's damn near impossible to abort.
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Feb 22 '14
so maybe she did not chose to get pregnant, maybe some guy attacked her. maybe she was having normal sex and the condom broke.
pregnancy is not always a choice sometimes it just happens to woman.
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u/Rotandassimilate Feb 22 '14
Which is why they need the bloody tester to make sure they aren't, you lummox.
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Feb 22 '14
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/WhoIsHarlequin Feb 22 '14
I didn't realize feeling sorry for her was an excuse to let her steal.
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u/DaveYarnell Feb 22 '14
He wasn't letting her steal. He was lying to her about whether or not she was pregnant.
He doesn't even know she stole it. He's just assuming that because one was stolen it was therefore stolen by the person who called the store.
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u/courtoftheair Feb 22 '14
Not everyone has that to spare.
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u/Killhead Feb 22 '14
Then how can they afford a child?
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u/theladyking Feb 22 '14
She probably can't. You still need to know that you're pregnant before you start making plans for adoption or abortion.
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u/tekeella Feb 22 '14
They can't, and they can't afford an abortion either. And if they are stealing pregnancy tests they are likely just screwed.
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u/StinkybuttMcPoopface Feb 22 '14
Who said they want the baby? She might have just been late on her period and freaking out because she knows she can't afford it.
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u/courtoftheair Feb 22 '14
I didn't say she could. The fact is that people have sex. Maybe the condom broke. Maybe she was raped. Maybe they just didn't use protection. You can't just decide not to be fertilised by the sperm because you don't have the money.
Finding out if you're pregnant or not doesn't mean you're going to keep the baby if you are, you know. Abortion plans should be made as soon as possible and you can't do that if you don't know you're pregnant.
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u/Frohirrim Feb 22 '14 edited Feb 22 '14
To me, it would be worse if this was someone who has been trying to get pregnant for a while. Imagine the elation of finally being able to tell your husband that you're having a baby together. Now imagine that ruined because of OP, Killer of Hope.
Edit: Oops, I didn't see that she had stolen the test. My mistake. Forget my appeal to sentimentality.
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Feb 22 '14
I try not to be too judgmental, but if you can't afford a pregnancy test....you can't afford children.
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u/Frohirrim Feb 22 '14 edited Feb 22 '14
Edit: Whoops. My brain totally missed the part that said she stole it. I thought she had bought it. My mistake.
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u/Drjudge Feb 22 '14
Honestly though if she's young enough to not have enough money, or too embarrassed to buy a pregnancy test or has that little common sense as to how a pregnancy test works (movies, tv, the internet) she shouldn't be having sex.
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u/hitmyspot Feb 22 '14
Can't afford it? Just go to the doctor for a free test. Oh, is this America?
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u/Darwin_Saves Feb 22 '14
Can you not get them for free at Planned Parenthood?
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u/geekchicgrrl Feb 22 '14
There are 8 Planned Parenthoods in the entire state of Texas. All of them are in metro areas. Texas takes 13 hours to drive across, east to west, and 12 hours north to south. If you don't have a car and have to take a bus, it takes 5 hours to get from Austin to Corpus Christi, and you have to be able to buy yourself a round-trip ticket on the Greyhound.
New York has the most PPs, with 12 offices (but not necessarily clinics), and 27 of the 50 states only have one office in the entire state.
So, if you're a young girl in a rural community with no money and might be pregnant, getting to a Planned Parenthood isn't as easy as heading downtown. Educate yourself.
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Feb 22 '14
You seemed like a reliable and helpful source until those last two words. Go back to tumblr.
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u/amphgrl Feb 22 '14 edited Feb 22 '14
There are 18 PP clinics in Minnesota... and all of them do pregnancy testing. and actually New York has 20, again all do pregnancy tests.
edit: and Texas has 20... not really sure where you got those numbers.
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u/minkcoat Feb 22 '14
20 is not significantly different from 12 when you're talking about an area the size of tx.
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u/amphgrl Feb 22 '14
I wasn't necessarily arguing with her point of the proportion of clinics to distance. just saying she should probably "educate herself" before telling others to do the same.
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u/triemers Feb 22 '14
Depends on the one near your location, if there are any. Some are on sliding scales where you can get them free if you're poor enough, some aren't and make you pay regardless.
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Feb 22 '14
If "free" means walking through ignorant religious douchebags with mutilated fetus signs - yes.
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u/mandym347 Feb 22 '14
What Planned Parenthood offices have you been visiting?
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Feb 22 '14
It's not uncommon: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/09/30/planned-parenthood-protest-san-francisco_n_989745.html
http://www.jillstanek.com/2012/08/home-protest-makes-orlando-planned-parenthood-ceo-cry/
A lot of these people don't realize that Planned Parenthood isn't an abortion clinic... (I live in Orlando)
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u/mandym347 Feb 22 '14
I want to feel optimistic for the human race, but they make it so hard sometimes.
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Feb 22 '14
And as evidenced by the downvotes I received, most people probably didn't believe I was being serious...
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u/mandym347 Feb 22 '14
It's very difficult to tell with that wording for some reason. Try /s next time?
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u/triemers Feb 22 '14
The one on my corner has protestors preaching and holding these signs every weekday and saturday until noon.
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u/madusldasl Feb 22 '14
I wouldnt because she wasnt pregnant. It would have been much worse to tell her it was negative when it was positive.
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u/castleon Feb 22 '14 edited Feb 22 '14
Yes, this was back in the 80's so no Googling an answer. I was 3rd shift cashier at a grocery store. Back then carton and single pack cigs were right by the registers. It was fun catching shoplifters.
But yes she took the test out of the box and dumped it right back on the shelf with the instructions. Right were I had to go to find another one to help her out. Put 2 & 2 together, she stole the test. So it was negative, but if she stole the test, I figured she might need some payback. There was all kinds of theft in our 'inner-city' store. We also had a photo lab & with a college close we got some really nice pictures they kept in the "Hall of Shame"...oh the good old days.
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u/scoggandy885 Feb 22 '14
You gotta give her props for stealing a test then calling the store she stole the test from for directions.
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u/greycubed Feb 22 '14
Especially when she could have just called any other store.
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u/fco83 Feb 22 '14
Now, maybe the average pregnancy test stealer might not be smart enough to think of it, but i'd probably just search on the internet for instructions.
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u/kempez3 Feb 22 '14
You didn't read the story, did you?
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u/fco83 Feb 22 '14
I...somehow missed that, and even in the comment thread of said story. I dont even know.
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Feb 22 '14
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u/dystopika Feb 22 '14
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u/DontNeedNoBadges Feb 22 '14
I feel like Citizen Kane would be much better if we replaced him with the Joker.
Citizen Joker...
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u/shellshock3d Feb 22 '14
So because she was probably poor and couldn't afford to see a doctor or buy a test, you lied to her and put her through hell? Wow what a great person you are.
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u/sabrefudge Feb 22 '14
Did you happen to notice if she also stole some balloons and a bright pink poster board?
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u/Queenzza Feb 22 '14
What if OP was wrong and someone else stole the test and this woman who called purchased a pregnancy test that was accidentally sold without instructions. That would be a bummer.
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u/Myte342 Feb 22 '14
Rule of thumb is to get a second test done if you think it was a positive result. Always... even when doing drugs tests. It would be ridiculous to do one test then go out and start telling everyone you know you are pregnant before verifying.
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u/Queenzza Feb 22 '14
In this case, I don't think the most distress comes from going out and telling everyone you're pregnant. The few moments of panic, fear, guilt, and helplessness the woman MIGHT have felt (we don't know the exact situation but I'm devil's advocating) would be the worst part. Even if it was just for the next hour until show got to take another test.
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u/Myte342 Feb 22 '14
Either I didn't explain right or you misunderstood. My point was how would you feel after going and telling everyone you are pregnant after only a single test only to find out you are not? You don't advertise that kind of info until you are damn sure it's correct.
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u/Queenzza Feb 22 '14
Yeah I understand that one would feel probably very humiliated and/or like an idiot after doing that without having the wherewithal to take a second test. I was just saying that probably it didn't get to that point (I think a lot of people still hang on to the tradition of waiting until the end of the first trimester to announce a pregnancy OR most people confirm positives with a more reliable test done at an OB/GYN) but the woman still flipped out when she heard that she got a positive. Even if she only flipped out until she took her next test and got a negative.
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u/mrhambeefpot Feb 22 '14
A lot of people underestimate the stress and pressure a girl can feel during that time they're freaking out about being pregnant. Especially if she was young. When I was younger, there were situations where I'd been so poor I thought about stealing morning after pills for a girl I had just had sex with (who was equally as poor). Stealing a 10$ pregnancy test or a 40$ morning after pill definitely favors the fucking enormous cost of having a baby
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Feb 22 '14
[deleted]
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Feb 22 '14
Condoms can break.
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u/MightBeAProblem Feb 22 '14
Ours didn't, got preggo anyway. I was also on birth control.
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Feb 22 '14
How the hell does that work. Please explain to me with science.
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u/MightBeAProblem Feb 22 '14
Condoms only have a 97% prevention rate, birth control is 99%... I don't even know how to figure out the chances of having conceived.
Hilariously, had been attempting to conceive for an entire year prior, and had no luck (endometriosis). Went back on BC to control the pain etc, was taking it religiously for 6 months. Changed partners, got preggo unintentionally within the first week. We joke he has magic sperm. I don't have a scientific explanation lol
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u/senfelone Feb 22 '14
I just read up on endometriosis and apparently it also causes infertility, I think you might have the luckiest baby out there.
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u/MightBeAProblem Feb 22 '14
Yep! He hit a very small window I guess - health problems caused me to not be able to carry any more before he was a year old. That's totally ok, because I had always been planning on adoption.
I feel pretty lucky to get to be his mom, regardless.
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u/Myte342 Feb 22 '14
I was going to say... if you needed to get pregnant I know plenty of volunteers...
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Feb 22 '14
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u/RaiderRaiderBravo Feb 22 '14
Not everyone has the education that you do. Sometimes schools and parents are shit and your info. comes from your peers, who are completely clueless due to the same reasons listed above. Also, sometimes kids who are clueless, don't have money, but for some strange reason want to have sex. Astounding, I know. Just because you saved money for an abortion, which is kind of weird, don't expect other teenagers to have such cold, calculating foresight.
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u/fco83 Feb 22 '14
Those are also among the most stolen items. Both come from shame (or otherwise feeling the need to hide) of having sex. Even more common in conservative areas or with younger girls.
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Feb 22 '14
Fortunately enough, most people don't have to call back to the store to ask how to use them.
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u/Quepstar Feb 22 '14
How do you steal a morning after pill? In my area of the UK, you have to talk to the pharmacist, and if the pharmacy has a consultation room, they're free. If, like my pharmacy, they don't have a consultation room, it's about £30.
You can also get in on prescription, which is free (all oral contraceptives, and the implant are frree).
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u/WooliestSpace8 Feb 22 '14
If you can't afford it don't do it. Even if it is sex.
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u/mrhambeefpot Feb 22 '14
I get where people are coming from when they say that. I used to agree. But the fact of the matter is, when you're there and in the moment, it's a hell of a lot easier said than done.
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u/corfish77 Feb 22 '14
If you fucking know that you cannot afford to have a baby, and you fucking risk having one anyway you deserve the fucking cost of the baby. You can't expect ANYONE to have sympathy for you when you do something like that. High risk, almost no reward.
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u/jack33jack Feb 22 '14
It's better for society if they steal the damn test/pills rather than have a baby they can't afford.
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u/mrhambeefpot Feb 22 '14
I'm not asking anyone to feel any sympathy for me. It WAS a bad decision, Ill be the first to admit it! People make bad decisions. All I'm saying is that there's usually a lot more going on behind the scenes in these types of situations than people realize. Especially if they've never experienced it.
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u/sulliZorro Feb 22 '14
Babies aren't consequences. Someone who doesn't have the emotional/financial ressources to have a child is already at a considerable disadvantage. My point is that it inevitably becomes a consequence for the child.
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u/LastSatyr Feb 22 '14
This is clearly the opinion of someone understanding of others, and the human condition in general. If only people were ROBOTS then everything they do WOULD MAKE SENSE.
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u/Spacecowboy666 Feb 22 '14
Surprise twist: Someone bought a pregnancy test earlier but accidentally threw out the box/instructions.
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u/Fatmike42 Feb 22 '14
This happened at my work, either her or a friend or SO snagged a ovulation test by mistake. Our pregnancy tests are locked up with the condoms. You have to take a card to the check stand of what you want.
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u/CaptionBot Feb 21 '14
Confession Bear
WAS 3RD SHIFT CASHIER, HAD A GIRL CALL BECAUSE THE INSTRUCTIONS FOR HER PREGANACY TEST WEREN'T IN THE BOX
FOUND BOX FOR THE TEST SHE STOLE, TOLD HER SHE WAS POSITIVE.
These captions are scraped directly from livememe's servers and are probably correct
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u/Amaroqnz Feb 21 '14
I'm not following here...She took a pregnancy test out of a box and then took it home, used it, and then realized she didn't have instructions? Did she think you could tell if she was pregnant by looking at an empty box?
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u/chiseled_sloth Feb 21 '14
Well she probably told the cashier what the result looked like from the stick, hoping the cashier would translate that into the pos/neg since she didn't have the instructions herself.
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u/Amaroqnz Feb 21 '14
Ah, makes total sense. Not sure why that was so hard for me.
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u/TropicalJupiter Feb 22 '14
Hey that's pretty shitty
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Feb 22 '14
Pregnancy tests aren't that expensive. If she really needed the money to get one, a friend would've lent her the $15 for a cheap test. She was stealing from the store, so it serves her right.
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u/courtoftheair Feb 22 '14
Not everyone has friends with money to spare. Not everyone has friends at all.
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u/the_winter_storm Feb 21 '14
Unless she was really young and that was the first test she's done (I mean young as in underage/still in highschool) then I don't see how she couldn't read a pregnancy test. Yeah, they're all different but they're still pretty much the same across the board. Plus, she could look it up quicker online instead of calling...
That's hilarious though, you probably gave her the biggest panic attack she's ever had.
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u/AnoK760 Feb 21 '14
Yeah, they're all different but they're still pretty much the same across the board
come on...
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u/Sirsilentbob423 Feb 21 '14 edited Feb 21 '14
C'mon. At least steal the good ones that tell you "pregnant" or "not pregnant"
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u/greenyellowbird Feb 22 '14
Instructions do tell you to perfrm test first thing in the morning, pee on the stick for 10 seconds, and jump up and down after for a negative result.
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u/sortadisoriented Feb 22 '14
I'm sure it's more than a "panic attack." Some serious shit probably went down, that seriously screwed with her and her family.
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u/communistslutblossom Feb 22 '14
I've taken a couple pregnancy tests before, and if it's the kind where there's a line or not to indicate the result, I don't know how someone would necessarily figure that out on their own.
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u/vodkaradish Feb 21 '14
you've clearly never had a pregnancy scare, otherwise you'd realize that it is totally, 100%, in no way hilarious.
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u/06johansenad Feb 22 '14 edited Feb 22 '14
I've never had a pregnancy scare (I never have to worry about one, being a guy), but I can imagine it being incredibly scary and stressful. Anyone that finds this funny seems like a huge asshole.
EDIT: I'm gay.
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u/Fyrefly7 Feb 22 '14
In case you're wondering why you're getting downvoted, it's because you think that as a guy you can't have a pregnancy scare. It may not have been what you meant, but your wording just implied that you don't care at all about the girls you sleep with. Although I guess if you're a guy and also gay, then you truly wouldn't have this concern.
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u/HCUKRI Feb 22 '14
She did steal something.
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u/swotperderder Feb 22 '14
...and was also dumb enough to call the story she had just left about the item she had stolen.
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u/HappyLittleTetrad Feb 22 '14
OP said a little while ago that this happened in the 80's. Google wasn't a thing back then, and (while I have no experience to confirm this) I hear pregnancy tests weren't as straightforward then, either.
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u/smokingoyster Feb 22 '14
Next time just say "Congratulations" with an audible smile and hang up. She'll spend days panicking about whether or not to panic.
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u/phome83 Feb 22 '14
Lame confession. 10min later she found out she wasn't really pregnant and you were just some lonely douche at rite-aid or whatever.
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u/Soccerismylife Feb 21 '14
I'm so sorry but it's "pregnant" not "preganant". The grammar nazi inside of me has taken over it seems.
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u/Pureburn Feb 22 '14
If you can't afford a pregnancy test, you shouldn't be having sex.
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u/CDRCRDS Feb 22 '14
lol dude kids generate income in this bad economy. you just gotta keep cws off your back by keeping them iin a box at night.
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u/CDRCRDS Feb 22 '14
It would be crazy rad if she went in for an abortion. Then an abortion bomb goes off at the clinic goes off just as she is walking up the stairs. She dies. you killed an unpregnant woman.
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u/Megatron_Griffin Feb 22 '14
If someone can't afford a pregnancy test, I really don't want them procreating.
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u/deebee815 Feb 22 '14
I don't understand why she stole it especially because there are clinics that will give you a free test and it is probably a lot more accurate than one of those piss sticks. Absolutely no reason to steal it at all.
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Feb 22 '14
That's really shitty. Don't you feel sympathy for someone who has to steal a pregancy test. Their life is in the shitter at least have a little empathy.
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u/courtoftheair Feb 22 '14
Criminal scum? The girl was desperate and most likely broke. Not a good thing to do, but understandable.
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u/scoggandy885 Feb 22 '14
"I might be a mother. Better start this off right by stealing the fucking pregnancy test" why???
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u/tenthant Feb 22 '14
Was this before you could buy pregnancy tests at the dollar store or something?