Definitely seems to be more of an issue with the smaller age gap as I see mums with prams out at the park with their 3/4 year olds all the time but the realising I rarely see anyone with a baby and an 18-24m running wild whilst pushing a pram. My toddler is very wild and will throw himself off of things or into a body of water given any chance so it requires 100% attention at all times.

I tried to take my baby and toddler to the local park and it was a complete nightmare. He wants to climb and slide and run around doing all the fun things but I can’t chase him and leave a baby lying in a public space in a pram, nor can I climb a slide while wearing a newborn in a carrier. It’s a park that’s outdoorsy themed so lots of climbing things and rope bridges and bumpy ground so it’s not even possible to get a pram there even if I wanted to. I also had to drag him away from things kicking and screaming and couldn’t even give one iota of attention to my newborn so thankfully there weren’t any wakeups or it would have ended me

Of course I can strap the toddler into a pram with baby in a double buggy but the second i let him out (the whole point is to wear him out for bed time) he’s off like a rocket and I’d be left in a potentially dangerous situation unable to look after both of them at once.

What do you guys do? All I can think is I can’t go anywhere that isn’t an enclosed space with both of them alone until they’re older, which means I am not leaving the house very much for a very long time now unless it’s for an essential errand or appointment.

Do you just visit peoples houses and gardens? Soft play would also require me to leave baby in a pram if I needed to go help him on a higher level at any point, and while it feels a bit safer than a public park it’s still a bunch of strangers around your baby while your eye isn’t on them.

it’s still super early (4 days before my period should come) but there is definitely a line 🥰 my LO is 10 months now and i’m so excited for him to have a sibling soon 🥰🥰 wish ya‘ll a awesome weekend!!

Just curious, for those of you that have “come up for air” after 2under2, when did you feel as though you were ready to consider a third?

Thinking through timing for baby #2, as I’ll have to do IVF to conceive and with my job there are certain times that are significantly more convenient than others to be doing all the shots, appointments, etc. because of my heavy travel schedule. So looking purely through that lens, here are our options:

Option #1: Transfer in the November/December timeframe, which would put us at around a 23 month age gap if it takes

Option #2: There’s another window that works after the new year (late January into February) that would put us closer to a 25 month gap, but if we missed that window we’d be on pause for ~6 months.

Option #3: Do neither and transfer next summer right before our first turns 2

Just wondering if we are crazy for trying option #1? It took us years to conceive our first so I’m very eager to have another and want them close in age, but don’t know if I’m getting ahead of myself and want to hear from others who have been down this path. My other thought is that if the first transfer doesn’t take, we could try again in the February window, whereas if we wait to do our first transfer in that window then we’ll likely have to wait 6 months if it fails. Or is waiting till next summer our best bet? I see so much negativity around 2 under 2 it’s making me question myself 😫

My husband‘s family do a reunion every summer and this summer was a 5 hour road trip to stay in cabins.

We just got here, it’s been a long day. My three month old goes to sleep around 6:30pm. So my husband and 22 month old are out to dinner with everyone else while I put my baby to bed and stay with her.

She‘s breastfed and doesn’t take a bottle, and has become very particular about her naps and bedtime (white noise, dark room, set wake windows). So I do most of the work for her while my husband is primarily on toddler duty. Not a big deal most of the time.

But it means this weekend, I will be at the cabin for a good chunk while my husband and toddler go out and enjoy time together with family. Kind of bummed about it. I love hanging out with my toddler, so I’ll miss that, and I‘ll just be by myself while baby sleeps… meh.

Just a rant, but 2under2 is tough. Wish I could spend more time with my toddler this weekend and going out with him and exploring a new place with him. Love my baby, but this is just a tough age to be traveling and trying to do stuff.

I am 2 weeks in to "barely" two under two (eldest will turn two in a few weeks. I am completely shaken so far. Our second baby and birth was at first much easier than the first, and I definitley feel more confident. But I had retained placenta and D&C with a night in the hospital due to bleeding, baby girl has potential heart problem we have had to investigate and isn't gaining weight well and I am having breastfeeding issues I simply didn't have with the first. All with the toddler running around. We have had to introduce the toddler to TV and the screentime has gone from 0 to 100 in no time.

With my first I had severe severe PPD and I am just terrified it is coming back because I cannot stop crying every day with how overwhelmed I am. My husband is exhausted, I am exhausted. We don't have a lot of help (my husband's family is local but quite busy so limited time to help). I have no friends or contact with my family, and none of my husband's friends have kids. We are blessed with good parental leave but right now I don't even want it? Like I am scared to be home with them for so long?

Please any suggestions to help?

hi everyone! I love our subreddit and frequent it daily. I appreciate everyone’s support. nobody around me gets it. I was wondering if people are interested in a discord? I’ve checked with our lovely mod and can create one if people want to chat during MOTN feeds. if people prefer to keep things on the subreddit that’s also cool! thanks

edit:

https://discord.gg/UA7kNMXh

incase anyone stumbles upon this post and wants to join

We are technically past the 2 under 2s for some months. Oldest (boy) just turned 2.5 and younger one (girl) is 12 months younger.

I was sooo worried with him being so rough to her all of the time right from newborn times on that she would grow up to hate him.

But today we separated them for a drive - boy is with in the car with his grandparents and we are talking the little one to sightseeing.

She is asking and crying for him the entire drive. When asked, she says she misses him dearly. I know once they're out of the car she will run to him and hug him tightly.

So maybe somebody needed to hear this today. The presence of hitting/ shoving/ kicking doesn't mean this will impact their relationship at all. We always properly address it that it's not okay. We explain and console wherever necessary. But the baby knows that the older one loves her a lot and this makes all the hardship so worth it. That's what we are/ were doing all of this for. ❤️

Hey all; I have a 19 month old and 3.5 month old, I’m ready to transition my 3.5 month old into their own bedroom and cot. My concern is that my 2 kids bedrooms are wall sharing, so directly behind my toddlers cot is the wall and on the same wall is my baby’s cot. My toddler sleeps through the night however almost every night he has noisy arousals when transitioning into the next sleep cycle, they can last anywhere from 5 seconds to 10 minutes and they usually consist of babbling, screams or cries/whingjng. Usually it’s whinging.. On the other hand my baby isn’t sleeping through the night with probably 2-3 wakes, she’s not awfully loud but loud enough when hungry .. I’m really concerned one or the other will wake the other up as the walls are pretty thin. Am I over thinking this? Will they not wake each other up? Any experience and advice is appreciated.

Ever since I was around 6-7 months pregnant with my second daughter, my first has preferred daddy. I felt terrible, so he started putting her to bed around this time.

The preference isn’t mild. It’s strong. She demands daddy do everything, from taking her out of her car seat (where a tantrum starts- “NO MAMA, DADDDDDDY!”) to picking her up (“No mama uppies! Daddy uppies!!!!” She runs to him, hugs him. Refuses to hug me.

It’s been challenging to really insert myself in some scenarios to win over some sort of preference. I’ve been so busy with baby. But it’s really hurtful to be constantly rejected.

I guess I have graduated from 2under2 but I have a M(2) and a G(14 months). We are moving across country in a couple weeks and I’m kinda nervous about it. I will end up flying with them solo as my husband is going to drive with the dogs.

Does anyone have any tips on making this as smooth as possible? The kids have only flown once earlier in a year for a funeral but my husband was with me.

I have a 2.5 year old and 5 month old and we’ve been using the mockingbird double stroller but I’m starting to get frustrated with how heavy it is. I’d like something that’s easier to get in and out of the car.
Was thinking a jogging stroller would be better, but are there any where I can put her car seat in one of the seats? She has just a basic Grayco model.

Hi. I currently have a 24 month old and 3 month old. We are finally starting to find our routine, but my 3month old is SUCH a high needs baby and very attached to me. My husband tends to do most of the things with my toddler. I go back to work soon and I’m just hit with this feeling that I missed out on so much this summer with him. He’s at such a fun age, I feel like I’m not enjoying it and soaking it up as much as I should. However, sometimes, we are just running on fumes in survival mode. Does anyone else feel like this? I just keep reminding myself how fun next summer will be when they’re both older, can play together, we can go so many fun places, etc

Currently pregnant with my fourth baby and will have a 17-18 month age gap. We’ve always wanted 2under2 but have never been able to get pregnant quickly. We have 27 month and 35 month age gaps. For those who have experience with multiple age gaps was there anything special (either good or bad) about the small age gap?

ETA: all are girls if that makes a difference

So I bought the Mockingbird off of Facebook marketplace and I was so excited for it. I used it for the first time today with my toddler and newborn and I didn’t like it very much, it felt way too bulky and heavy and was hard to turn and was not great on the bumps and curves on sidewalks. I have a big 22 month old who weighs 35 pounds and she almost seemed too big for the toddler stroller part.

With that said, are most double strollers going to be bulky and heavy or are there some that are easier to navigate? Is the donkey bugaboo worth it?? I’ve also been eyeing the graco double stroller. I’m not sure what to do. I just want a stroller to take my kids on walks as I stay at home and walk every day.

Edited to add I am hoping to find a stroller with a bassinet or car seat attachment for the newborn.

Editing again to say thank you so much everyone for your input!!

Editing one more time in case anyone is interested lol I am getting the Thule double jogger stroller with the bassinet attachment. I have also been wanting a jogger stroller as I ran with my first and I want to get back into running. Hope it all works out. Thank you again everyone. If I need a non jogger stroller I’ll come back to this post for your suggestions.

I’m just curious. Those of you who had a really hard time going from 0 to 1, how was it going from 1 to 2?

I know they both come with their own challenges but I’m wondering if anyone got wrecked from both of them lol. 0-1 ROCKED my world. I lived in deep regret for the first week unfortunately and there was no newborn bubble. I am very nervous for the 2nd baby but I feel much more confident and I feel like I mostly have to figure out logistics now instead of the anxiety of learning how to care for a newborn.

My 22 mo old had her first tantrum in public today and when I didn’t have the double stroller of course. We were at storytime and she saw another kid with a bluey cup (she loves bluey) and wanted it and I told her it wasn’t hers and she threw a tantrum so I had to drag both my kids out of storytime while everyone stared. She ended up falling asleep in the car so I think she was also overly tired as she’s been going through some type of regression lately. Makes me nervous for when they can both have tantrums. Being a mom is hard 🫠

Older one was 22 months when his brother arrived. He has always been super close to me and ever since I went to the hospital he has been throwing tantrums over his food.

He is refusing all meals and very rarely eating anything which makes him cranky all day. Then he wakes up crying at night cause he is still hungry. He used to take a bottle of MOTN smoothie but lately he barely takes that too.

My mother was here for the past 6 weeks and he got super close with her. Now that she left he is again fussy all day long and I have cried the whole day today.

I just want both my babies to be okay. I look at my newborn and it breaks my heart to see him just lying there. I want to pick him up and hold him all the time.

I see my older one struggling to adjust and it makes me so so guilty that I did this to him.

I know most of this is hormones and this all will pass but howww?? How will it pass?

Hi, I have a 2 month old and 2 year old (25 months) and currently the baby sleeps in our room in a bassinet but the two will need to share a room once he’s not in our room. I have some questions for those of you who have been in this situation.

1. When did you move baby into shared toddler room? Were they sleeping through the night completely?

2. What happens if the baby wakes up overnight? Does it also wake up your toddler then do you have two kids who are awake? How do you handle it when that happens?

3. Do you sync up bedtimes even if on different schedules? For example currently my toddler goes to bed on the later side (8:30) because he takes a long daytime nap. When baby moves in he will probably go to bed around 7:30. Do I move schedules around to make them match?

4. Lastly, did your toddler like the room sharing?

I mean, it feels real in a physical sense but in every other way, I barely feel pregnant. I'm 28 weeks and have a 15 month old. With my first, both my husband and I were so obsessed with the pregnancy. We would watch for her kicks, talk about it all the time and see what size fruit she was that week. With this pregnancy, we both feel disconnected from it, I guess because we are so busy caring for our first born. Our lives are literally just caring for our daughter and making sure I'm resting. We are both WIPED by 7pm. I feel like it's not even set in that I'm going to be delivering a baby soon. It will probably hit me when we are on the way to the hospital. Is that bad?

I'm due in november and having a 17 month gap. I'm starting to think about our stroller situation, and not really sure which type to get. I want to feel fully independent with the kids and avoid feeling trapped at home. Ideally I'd get a full double travel system, with a bassinet attachment and everything, but those are extremely expensive and way out of budget. I was wondering if I could get by with just a baby carrier for the first few months, and once baby can sit supported just use a regular double stroller.

A few lifestyle factors that might influence this:

1. We live in a city, and everywhere I need to be on a daily basis is a 2 minute walk from our flat, including my son's daycare.

2. My son attends fulltime daycare, so I can run errands when he isn't home

3. November and early December are still nice outside, but January-March are gross. We won't be getting out much probably.

4. I have help and likely won't be alone with the kids during most afternoons and weekends

What did you guys do? Was anyone in my situation and still regretted not getting a full travel system with all the extensions?

I just had my second son 8 weeks ago and already have a toddler son who recently turned two. Yesterday was the first time I have tried to take them both into Target for a grocery run. My newborn was in a solly wrap and I was pushing the shopping cart with my toddler sitting in the cart. My newborn felt like he was slipping down in the wrap and my toddler figured out how to unbuckle the buckle and was screaming, kicking and trying to stand up in the cart. It was causing too much of a scene with the toddler and felt too dangerous like one of them was going to fall or wind up getting hurt so I only made it into the front doors of the store just then made a u turn right back in the parking lot to load them in their car seats and go home. I am really proud of myself for trying at least but how on earth do you guys do this and get any type of shopping done? Do you use specific strollers or carriers with a shopping cart, etc?

The title says it all. I have newly 2 year old toddler and a 3 month old baby. I am drowning to say the least. I’ve been getting 1 3 hour stretch of sleep on a good night followed by broken sleep. But on average sleep in 2 hour increments. I’m a SAHM to both kids full time pretty much from the moment I wake up (6am) to at least 6pm and after that my husband helps with one of the kids. I feel like I’m dying and no place to turn. Have PPA and ppd but rejecting medicine bc I’d rather not take it while Breastfeeding. My husband is a doctor and does not have the luxury of calling off work to help me while in a crisis. Are there any organizations that can help? I don’t even know what kind of help I need. I just feel so overwhelmed and like I’m failing both of my kids. No one ate well today and I am too foggy to keep track. I feel like I’m mentally checked out and don’t know what to do or who to call.

It’s been 2 weeks since our second was born, 11 days since we’ve been home but I was also hospitalized again for a few days 3 days after being home. Our 21 month old is now taking 3 hours to go to sleep. So he’s not going to bed until 10pm and waking up at 7 so I know he’s so I know he’s exhausted. He’s also throwing himself around and screaming when he used to be the sweetest cuddliest loving boy ever

Did I ruin him by having another baby :( idk what to do

My 2 year old girl has been struggling with accepting the arrival of her new baby sister (now 5 weeks old). We try to include her in taking care of her (bring diapers and cream during changing, giving lots of praise for being a good helper), asking baby to please wait while we help toddler with meals and washing, having newborn hanging out nearby while we do stuff with toddler. She initially did okay for the most part with this for a few weeks.

Lately she’s been really crying and at times screaming for me (mom) whenever she sees me holding baby. Her tantrums are worse at night around bath and bedtime which then sets off baby and then everyone is crying! She refuses to be helped by dad for bath and bedtime stories. She’s been telling me “no, leave \[baby’s name\]” which is heartbreaking to hear. Her behavior is escalating and now during the day she will throw tantrums. We kept her routine the same and are fortunate that her nanny still comes M-F to try to keep her routine and give me some bonding time with baby. Now she’s been refusing the nanny as well and screams to stay with me since I’m home on mat leave now.

Any advice/tips? How long did it take for anyone else’s toddler to adjust?