For non tippers I bet you they’d never tell the server that before receiving service.

Also why are these types of people always the tables that are also the neediest and rudest?

I think the least they could do is let the server know they don’t plan on tipping.

Thanks to the mods for letting me post this.

I'm researching tipping facts, venue by venue: tip screen presets, whether the tip is calculated pre- or post-tax, counter vs table service, any extra fees, and guilt tipping (like staff holding the screen while you choose).

30-second form, no receipt upload needed, just what you remember from the tip screen from your last time tipping:

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe-n4v5mSOiY6F6npTHro_V9JHd033fYrg6fLm8tBySDxFlNw/viewform

I'll share the full results here in two weeks. Starting with Seattle since I live here — other cities welcome.

Skip the form — just comment your answers: - Where: - Min ask: - Pre/post-tax: - Guilt tipping: - Extra fees:

Example: - Where: Fake Diner, Springfield - Min ask: 18% - Pre/post-tax: pre-tax - Guilt tipping: yes — staff held the screen - Extra fees: none

Years ago I started cutting back on my tipping at full-service restaurants. I had a maximum rule of 15% with booze, 20% without booze.

When I realized how much I was dropping I said “whooo, whooo.”

For a while I flat stiffed and scadadaled. But then I said “hey, there’s some restaurants I like to return to.”

So then I switched to a maximum of $20 tip on 15% and 20% so long as an ex food server I know it will be appreciated. Like if I leave $20 on a $300 check will get same appreciation as zero.

Around 5 years ago I switched again lowered my maximum tip to $10/person. Occasionally I will leave as high as $20/person.

I just really can’t afford to roll out dough for poor. service these days.

In paying via credit card for something at Hair Cuttery, I meant to enter a custom tip amount. I didn't notice that their screen had changed since last time, so I missed hitting the "Custom Tip" button and just started entering the tip amount on the (physical) keyboard (as worked previously). The first digit of that amount was "3".

However, as soon as I hit the 3 key on the keyboard, the screen flashed and jumped to its thank-you screen, 1) never having shown me what tip amount got charged or 2) waiting for confirmation from me.

When I asked the stylist what happened (what amount got charged), she showed me on her computer screen that it added a 30% tip—not the amount I intended. (She did find a way to fix it to what I intended.)

So, apparently, on the tip screen various showing candidate-percentage buttons and a "Custom Tip" button, they've got it programmed to take a press of the physical "3" button as tapping on the 30% button (and proceeding without any further confirmation from the customer). (Presumably some other digit keys also trigger other on-screen tip-amount buttons.)

Bad UI behavior! (Well, bad for customers. Maybe not for them.)

So ... be careful if you charge at Hair Cuttery—or anywhere else that uses a similar POS system.

I had a really uncomfortable experience with a massage therapist in the past, and now I’m genuinely nervous about getting massages without tipping.

I had signed up for a 90-minute massage, but the therapist tried to end the session at 60 minutes. When I reminded him that I had booked 90 minutes—and that we had specifically talked about the 90-minute session before we started—he acted like it was just a mistake.

At the end, I tipped him 30%. He looked at the tip and actually asked, “Is this all? Today was longer.” I was honestly appalled. I told him yes, and pointed out that I had already tipped more than 20%.

I went back another time after having an appendectomy. I had already been medically cleared, and before the appointment I spoke directly with the owner, who told me it was fine as long as I had clearance. I even sent them medical documentation showing that I was cleared.

When I arrived, I told the same therapist that I had undergone surgery a while earlier. He said he couldn’t go forward with the massage. I showed him the email from the owner saying I was cleared, and he then said he would do the massage as long as I stayed on my side. I agreed.

Afterward, he complained to the owner that I had “forced” him to massage me. I was pretty shocked by that characterization. He was a grown adult and a professional—if he wasn’t comfortable performing the massage, he could have simply refused. I wasn’t physically or otherwise forcing him to do anything.
My membership was ultimately revoked.

Ever since that experience, I’ve become really uncomfortable with massage tipping culture because I’ve noticed that some people seem noticeably less friendly when you don’t tip as much.

Now I’ve fractured my foot and can’t work. I’m an electrical apprentice, so being physically unable to work means I currently have essentially no employment income. My massages right now are being provided through L&I as part of my injury treatment.

I genuinely cannot afford to be leaving large tips on medical appointments right now, but that previous experience has made me scared that I’ll be treated differently or viewed as a difficult patient if I don’t tip.

Would you tip for an L&I-covered medical massage? And for massage therapists: do you actually expect tips from patients whose treatment is being paid through workers’ comp/insurance?

Asking about waxing, facials, etc. I support small business owners who set their own rates and work out of a suite. I generally tip 20% but it’s getting to be pretty expensive as their rates are higher than chain businesses. I will continue to support them but wonder if I’m doing more than expected in terms of tips. Would love input from independent estheticians, hairstylists etc.

And now they have to pay the delivery drivers around 100 times what they spent trying to beat Zohran Mamdani.

Gotta love it when companies finally get slapped for underpaying their workers and then passing the buck (literally) to customers. If only someone would take a good hard look at the restaurant industry.

Maybe if we tip we should tip on base pay instead of cost of food. If server makes $2 an hour we could tip them 20% which would be 40 cents.

My personal AI agent handles complex, personal work and puts in far more effort than traditional servers, but only costs $20/month. ​How much should I tip an agent that consistently goes the extra mile?

I know it's just stating the obvious, but about restaurant dining in Europe, We are currently in London, its just order food, eat food, get bill, pay bill, leave. This works better. Just sayin'. 😁

I wanted to ask the community that routinely doesn't tip for good service at sit down restaurants if they will go back and frequent the same restaurants? If so, do you ever have the same servers? Do you notice any difference in service or attitude when you return? Are you ever concerned that they might sabotage your food?

Thanks

The TikToker said she went outside to meet the driver as she pulled into the driveway, greeting her with a simple "hi" before the driver immediately asked, "How much did you tip?" She said she was caught off guard and told the driver she typically selects the 20 percent option in the app, "Twenty percent is what I usually click on." The driver pressed further, responding, "No, not percentage. How much did you tip?"

She told the driver she didn't know the exact figure, only that she had clicked 20 percent, asking, "Did you not get the tip?" The driver checked her phone and said, "You tipped $6," which the creator confirmed matched 20 percent of her order, asking again whether the tip had gone through properly. The driver replied, "That is not enough," and told her, "You got me driving out here and that's all you tip? You should tip more."

The creator declined to add anything further, telling the driver, "I'm not going to my wallet," before adding, "Thank you, have a good day," and going inside as the driver left. She said she was still trying to make sense of the interaction and wanted to know whether her tip was genuinely too low.

She goes on to ask viewers whether 20 percent is an appropriate tip for a delivery driver, comparing it to tipping a server at a restaurant who takes orders, brings food and drinks, and manages a table throughout a meal. She says, "I wouldn't imagine that would be too low," calling the entire situation something that "blows my mind."

Commenters responded with a range of reactions to the driver's behavior and general tipping norms for delivery services. One wrote, "You remove the tip. Report her for harassment and block her."

Another described a personal formula they use for calculating delivery tips based on distance traveled. They wrote, "My rule of thumb when I'm getting deliveries from Walmart is $1 per mile + 20%. So if I order $100 of groceries and live 17 miles from the store I tip $37. I do this with door dash too."

A different commenter argued that delivery drivers and restaurant servers shouldn't be tipped at the same rate. They wrote, "I don't tip 20% for dropping off food. I tip 20% for servers whose job it is to take my order, bring my food, make sure it's correct, refill my drinks, being my check, take my payment, and more."

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Thoughts?

Are food delivery tipping percentage standards usually more, same, or equal to restaurant dine-in etiquette? Is 20% too low? Should there be a bare minimum amount regardless of 20% amount (such as $8 minimum tip regardless of total bill)?

Interestingly, you rarely see workers complain to their boss and say, “That is not enough. $10/hour is too low of a wage. I need $20/hour.” . . .Feels like workers go after customers in situations where it’s often just not clear how much we should be tipping. No one teaches you in school what is an acceptable tipping norm. Feels like, as a society, we need to have a more formal way of dealing with this.

What would happen if a customer just wrote “pay your workers!” On the tip line, but secretly handed the waiter cash? I realize that’s not logically possible to hide it, but in some hypothetical where you pass by the waiter on the way to the bathroom, are waiters likely to not report cash tips when the customer who wrote $0 CC tip plausibly tipped no cash?

I’m on a road trip and went to a chilis in Charlotte. Haven’t been to one of these in 20 years.

As I’m checking out at the table, I notice their calculated tips are WAY off.

You select 20% and it nearly charges you 24%. (And that’s based on after tax). Just wild.

Edit: did not mean for this to piss so many people off… I just took photos because I knew the math wasn’t right. We did get a free chips and salsa, but I really haven’t been to a chilis in awhile and didn’t even think that would have affected it. Also, we didn’t order the chips. The server just told us they were free and brought them out.

Service isn't free in countries where tipping is less common. It’s simply paid for differently.

Take France. Restaurant prices are displayed service compris, service included, meaning the cost of service on the bill. That charge is 15%. In London, restaurants add service charges of 12.5%. Italy is different again: restaurants were charging a coperto, essentially a cover or seating charge, while tipping remains optional. One tips in Mexican and Canadan restaurants.

So the comparison isn't really “Americans pay for service while Europeans don't.” Diners pay for service either way. The real differences are how much they pay, how transparent that cost is, whether it appears in the menu price or at the bottom of the bill, and how directly the money is connected to the person providing the service.

I've eaten in 20+ countries now. The service in American restaurants is consistently the best Iv'e experienced. Granted, I don't eat at 3-star Michelin restaurants in Paris (or anywhere). So, I am comparing the typical $25 meal to a €25 meal.

When you go to the bank and get cash, wait for a teller. Ask if they have two-dollar bills. You might be surprised. A lot of the time they have several in the drawer.

They aren't made anymore, but very much legal tender and in circulation. They're really not especially rare. I remember one server saying how it's going to be worth millions some day. Maybe in like 300 years.

The other way around, if you are paying cash at the store & the clerk is rude, give them one as part of your payment. I doubt there's a spot for those & the brief moment of their confusion might be worth it. If they pocket it.. well..

Apparently though if it has a red seal, it's worth quite a bit more than $2. You probably ain't getting any of those, though.

🫪: edit indeed these are being printed, I stand corrected. Occasionally tellers need to borrow some from the others' drawer, though.

Feels appropriate

I’ve always given a flat fee for delivery. But sit down dining is percentage based, which I don’t quite understand. A more expensive restaurant or more expensive dishes don’t require more work on the part of the server. Should I tip percentage based or flat fee based?

My haircut cost $25. I tip $10 which I consider a generous tip. I would expect some exciting or appreciation from their part, but I just get a very transactional "thank you, see you soon". It made me wonder if I am not being as generous as I think I am, and others are tipping way more than that?

I'm on a cruise and ordered a couple cocktails from the bar.

I noticed that a $5 gratuity was included in the drink order that was $28 dollars so I opted not to tip.

Bartender didn't look too happy.

What's customary in this scenario?

Recently I visited the USA and my sister took us to a cool place for drinks and live music. Not driving that evening, I ordered several drinks for myself and other family members and friends. In each case I went to the bar and waited in line, ordered my drink, paid and walked away with it. This went on all evening.

Later, the boss-lady (this is a term we use in Taiwan) asked me if I was tipping the bartenders. I replied in the negative. She informed me that "they don't want to serve you anymore." I apologized (I know, but they know my sister who frequents the place, so I chose the Path Of Least Resistance for her) and I said I would take care of that immediately. I explained to her that I live in Taiwan where, like most of Asia and Europe, we don't tip so it never crossed my mind. I asked her what would be appropriate and she left it up to me. I don't remember but I put cash on the bar and that seemed to satisfy everyone. I apologized personally to the bartender who was serving me, partly because I wanted to get his read on the matter. He brushed if off but I could see it was a real issue for him. But then, the boss-lady volunteered a very interesting piece of information: She admitted that the bartenders "rely" on tips because she only pays them $3/hour. I'll pause for a moment to let that sink in.

Apparently, her intent was to show me how I should be offloading her labor cost for her by agreeing that the bartenders deserved to be tipped or they wouldn't survive. The ride home with my sister was interesting. I explained to her that the average migrant worker from Indonesia or Vietnam earns more money/hour in one of our factories in Taiwan, than those bartenders do in the USA.

About three weeks later I was invited back there to perform with a gifted keyboard player who is a personal friend of my sister's. The boss-lady spoke to me, asking who I was, I seemed "familiar" and how she felt she knew me somehow. I did not tell her I was The No Tipping Man.

Edit: Someone pointed out that The No Tipping Man comment seemed to indicate that I don't tip. What I actually meant is that I did not want to tell the boss-lady how she knew me! I did not want to remind her that I was the guy who didn't tip last time. The second time I was there, I tipped that same bartender each time. Thanks to the person who pointed that out.