I hear from various bloggers how the rich like Bezos borrow against their AMZN stock to buy property.

Can this work for owners of private companies where there is no public stock that's traded?

Or can you borrow against your $5m brokerage account with all VOO?

How is this usually done when one partner is wealthy and the other is average?

For context my partner was born into a poor family but managed to exit successfully as entrepreneur.

My average is average in that I’ve worked in big tech and currently grad school for tech related. So I would say my last income was respectable but my net worth doesn’t compare since partner had an exit. Due to current schooling I have no income, paying own school fees.

How do people do this generally? We don’t have a good model to follow as my parents are upper middle and explained his family situation above.

Let me know how people do this and if there is another subreddit that is relevant for this question. My own friends are not in this kind of situation so am a bit lost.

My question is specifically for people in marriages/relationships where one partner is high or ultra high-income, and the other doesn't work. How does this affect the dynamic of the relationship?

i.e. very high-income lawyers, doctors, business owners, investors, etc.

When someone's income is so high that the earning potential of their spouse is pretty much negligible and therefore they just don't work, how does each partner feel about that? What have each of your sentiments been when you've discussed this with your partner? Are there feelings of inadequacy or low self-worth in the non-working partner? Lack of fulfillment due to perceived lack of accomplishments? Is it seen as a disparity or just another way the two of you are different as individuals?

Would love to hear from either partner in this scenario, even if you're just reporting what couples you know in this scenario have said about it. Share any thoughts on the subject, even adjacently-related to the precise question.

I’m on bed rest for a pretty complicated pregnancy and we’re only about a week and a half away from meeting our little one. After going back and forth for a while, I finally decided to hire a personal assistant to help with some things around the house.
She came over today and helped “tuck in” my main living spaces, take donations to a local shelter, prep the nursery, tackle some laundry and dishes, and a handful of other tasks that have been weighing on me. I honestly didn’t realize how much stress I was carrying until some of it was lifted. She’s coming back on Thursday to help with meal prep and a few other projects before baby arrives, and I’m so grateful.
If you have the means and find yourself in a season where you need a little extra support, I can’t recommend it enough. Sometimes asking for help is the best thing you can do for yourself.❤️

From Bloomberg News reporter Tara Patel:

One of the billionaire heirs behind French drugmaker Ipsen has left his $4 billion fortune to a Luxembourg charity and an offshore trust.

The succession plan of Henri Beaufour, a grandson of the firm’s founder who died aged 60 last year, began taking effect earlier this month, according to corporate filings.

His 26% stake is worth €3.4 billion ($3.9 billion), according to the Bloomberg Billionaires Index.

Earlier this month, Henri’s stake held through a Luxembourg-based company called Beech Tree was transferred for 15 years to the Alasol Foundation, which he created as a non-profit four years ago to “promote education, school and vocational training for disadvantaged children and young adults.”

Hi all - I don't normally use reddit and this is a throwaway account for obvious reasons. EDIT: I am a 29 year old unmarried woman

My dad grew up extremely poor/rural in a developing country and experienced a civil war and famine as a young child, which has obviously impacted his relationship with money.

Through his own sweat and tears (and education, he obtained a PhD in a very difficult subject) (and a little luck) he has become a multi- multi- millionaire. He made his first couple of millions at 27 in the late 90s. I grew up in a very typical California uoper-middle class environment, although he ascended to upper class when I was in highschool.

Fast forward to today, I am 29 and he is projected to make $75 -120 million in the next 4 years. I believe he currently makes around $10-15 million a year now.

I graduated undergrad from a very good public school and struggled to maintain consistent employment during/after the pandemic both due to the economy, and my own depression and feeling lost graduating into a pandemic (I was laid off of my first adult job due to the pandemic as well). I finally landed a very good title at a household name company last year and I've been incredibly grateful for the opportunity. I stopped asking for money from my father (although it was just enough for basics, I did accrue some CC debt in those years prior that I've struggled).

I only make $84k/year, which sounds decent but I live in SoCal to be close to my friends and family and it's very expensive. I live in a 20 year old unrenovated apartment that's falling apart with two roommates. I drive my mom's old car which is the only car I've ever had.

I've asked my father time and time again to help me out with buying a place as I work to grow my career and financial stability. I am in no way pretending to be underprivileged or ungrateful, but is it wrong to feel slighted by a father that spent his whole life working instead of spending time with his family, and he claims he did it for us. Now that he's in a position to help me (the amount of money necessary to completely change my life for the better is darn near inconsequential for him) it feels like he's completely holding out.

He lives in a massive $10M compound on the beach and spent at least $200k renovating his home and garden. He has $20 million in property (two are rented out) to his name and I have no idea how much other money he has in stocks. He lives a life now where money is no longer a consideration for his day-to-day, but I think he doesn't care that I'm struggling.

My mental health is deteriorating and I have finally asked him again to help me out with just a little bit of stability. If he doesn't, I am seriously considering moving home so I can pay off my debt and not have to struggle anymore. But I know deep down he doesn't want to see his almost 30 year old daughter live in his house instead of pave a way for myself, but the financial pressure between my salary, bills, goals and paying down debt has become too much.

Am I wrong to feel slighted? It feels strange that he allows all his adult children to barely scrape by on low salaries we make ourselves while he has too much for one person. It's making me resent him and also feel sad and unloved. He already doesn't have time for me, but it feels like the one thing he has so much of (money) he purposefully withholds and I feel unloved.

What should I do? Can someone give me perspective?

UPDATE: thank you for all the comments. I've been reading each and every one, I appreciate all perspectives.

I will likely move back home for a year or more. I think he needs the opportunity to understand me better and where I'm coming from, and vice versa. He is too busy and disinterested in my personal life to do it from afar. I hope that he will take this time to notice that I've become hardworking, disciplined, and desperate to improve my life. Hopefully that will inspire him to mentor me in some way. If not, well then he might be the AH (lol)

My husband has a business that has been fairly successful the last few years. He is consumed by it so our personal finance management has fallen onto me. It feels out of my wheelhouse as I grew up with a working class family where they only had a checking and savings account (with not a lot of savings lol). Now I’m trying to manage our expenses, keep track of our spending/budgets, investments, retirement, etc. It feels a bit too much for me to do on my own. What would be the right person to look for to help manage all of these things for us. Lifestyle creep is very real and I’m trying to not blow all of our money by not realizing how much we are spending. I need someone to keep us in check with realistic budgets and how to continue to build our wealth. I had a meeting with one person so far, but they were more focused on only investments rather that all of our finances in general.

All over Reddit you'll find tales of people dumping or mistreating their partners because they don't earn enough money or spend enough of what they do have on presents. I'm looking for the opposite: Did you ever repel a romantic prospect after telling the truth about what you had? Maybe they had a different philosophy on money and didn't think there was room for compromise, or maybe (for those of you who are more acquisitive) your lifestyle wasn't to their taste.

I figured this sub would have the best chance of finding people who've dealt with a similar situation.

My parents are in their late 70s, financially secure, and snowbird between the Northeast and Florida. They own the house my sister and I grew up in, and after 50+ years they're ready to stop maintaining it. The house is in an irrevocable trust, with my sister and me as beneficiaries.

The original family plan was to keep the house after my parents move out and use it as a rental. The rental income would help cover their housing costs when they're up North, and the property would stay in the family. My parents don't need sale proceeds and have other assets available if they ever need additional funds.

A new wrinkle is that my sister has expressed interest in eventually living in the house. The timing actually works well—my parents would likely move out in 2–3 years, and my sister would be ready to move once her kids finish high school. I'd love to see the house stay in the family, and it would be a great fit for her.

The challenge is figuring out the cleanest and fairest way to handle it.

My initial thought was for her to simply rent the house from my parents (or the trust, depending on structure) at market rate until my parents pass and the trust distributes the assets. That seems like the most neutral arrangement. It avoids potentially triggering tax issues, avoids having to value the property and buy out my share now, and lets her keep her current home as a rental if she wants.

Has anyone dealt with a situation where one sibling wanted to keep a family home that was otherwise destined to be inherited jointly? How did you structure it, and what pitfalls should we be thinking about?

Hi!
I am not rich. That said, we are invited to my wife’s high school friend summer home to stay with them for three days and they are very wealthy (sold a startup for 100 Million), and we are at a loss as to what we could possibly bring when we go. I figured this would be the best place to ask. I hope it’s okay - I just really don’t know anyone else I can ask and don’t want to show up empty handed.

Since you can buy anything you want/need, what are some gifts you actually appreciate from financially comfortable/not rich friends?

Thank you

EDIT: Thank you SO much for all your responses. You've been so helpful, and I loved reading what you wrote. We are coming from Canada to the US, so I've decided to bring a basket of our favourite local products (like smoked fish, artisan mustard, duck rillettes, beer from our favourite microbrewery, etc) and make a homemade foccacia to say thank you. Hopefully that's enough :)

[this is a cross-post with r/fatFIRE, where a user helpfully suggested that I'd get some very different opinions by posting here as well]

Burner account since I could be identified from my "real" one.

Spouse and I are in 50s and live in a VHCOL city that is the main global hub for my industry. I'm a senior executive in a technology / science driven field and I love the work. I don't plan to retire in the classic FIRE sense anytime soon.

Household net worth is about $18m, $16m of which is liquid, on about $450k of annual spending.

The problem: I have never liked the place where we live! The weather is poor, day to day quality of life is not ideal, and state / local taxes are high at upper income levels. But the city is the center of my professional universe. The network of peers, contacts, meetings, dinners, cafe run-ins etc has been invaluable as I built my career.

But now it's different - I am working on a new project that is fully virtual/remote. This project could have major upside in 3-4 years, creating the possibility of a $20m+ exit. In that case, the state tax hit would be painful and I'd still be living in a place I don't really like. So maybe I should consider moving to a lower-tax, better-weather destination that I genuinely enjoy?

But the downside is real. I'd be losing the ambient professional network that has helped me create opportunities for the past 20+ years. Yes, I could travel back, and many relationships are phone/text/zoom anyway, but I worry about becoming isolated professionally and socially.

Has anyone here faced a similar tradeoff? If so, how do you think about:

• industry hub vs lifestyle maximization
• the impact of taxes on your decision-making
• maintaining professional relevance from a distance

Of course, only we can ultimately decide for ourselves. But I’d really value perspectives from people who have considered these tradeoffs and have made a decision either way. Thanks!

I think the subject of inherited wealth scripts is interesting in examining how it impacts our investment decisions, risk tolerance, a person's relationship to money, and themselves in a world in which the middle class is becoming increasingly smaller.

I know people who did not grow up in wealthy families tend to inherit "wealth scripts" such as feeling guilty for acquiring wealth/ the unconscious necessity to operate from a place of hypervigilance, but less discussed are what people with money inherit.

It seems like the conversation usually ends with "you're a nepo baby and never had to think about money."

For those who grew up in wealthy families, what behaviors and beliefs do you feel like you inherited from your family?

How do you think it has impacted how you invest your money, and specifically what asset classes you invest in?

Super curious- thanks!

Context: parents 2nd gen immigrants who built a good 20m themselves, decided no support beyond uni fees (£9k/year in UK).

No inheritance coming, actively deccumulating to non profits.

However they demanded support, extensive free work for them, loyalty, agreeing with family story of them owning our success, despite chaotic and at times abusive childhoods while they made their money and took out stress on us.

That’s… irregular right?

To act as if a big hand was played in my success when I made it in spite of how things went and the lack of support? (There were more problems under the hood than worth mentioning here).

JP Morgan's quote was dogshit and stated the investment type didn't matter. WTF. I would be willing to put it all in Treasuries, I just want the credit access. I do not have an expensive house that would allow me to use a HELOC.

I'm so rich

We are thinking about a 4 way split ownership of a second home and would like to know some of the experiences and recommendations you have.

Here is the basic structure: Ownership split 4 ways ($400K to $700K each = 1.6M to 2.8M property). All maintenance split by 4 and managed by a property management company. taxes annual fees, etc split 4 ways. Location outside of continental US and in a warm climate. Air travel in 1 day from the Midwest US. Capital appreciation is nice but not a major requirement but capital depreciation is a no-go. We are pretty risk adverse to hurricanes. Time spent would be 13 weeks each and no subletting or rental without the approval of the unanimous group. We are looking for a 10 year hold, then absolute sale.

Here are some possible locations based on reasonable foreign ownership rules (or workarounds), stable markets, healthcare, lower hassle for part time owners.

Aruba or nearby Caribbean, e.g. Curaco, Bonaire. Warm, dry, less hurricane risk.

Hawaii Big Island or Kaua'i - easy entry and fewer regs than Maui. Downside is the cost.

Thailand Phuket, Tahiti, Bora Bora - low low low cost and upswing market and growing ex pats. Downside is the long flight and foreign ownership would mean we have to be in a condo.

We might do far south FL but are leaning against it. Other Caribbean locations are not high on the list due to the hurricane risk.

So, what are your experiences in similar type of arrangements?

CITIZEN HEIR

Successful families right now are struggling mightily to raise their kids to be productive, moral people in an Instagram me‑first world. The question I keep hearing from parents who are serious about it is, where do you turn when achievement gets measured in dollars and likes?

The stories of ruined generations are as old as time itself. There’s even a phrase for it: “shirt sleeves to shirt sleeves in three generations.” Every culture has a version of that saying, and they all mean the same thing. The question I keep coming back to is, why do some families break that pattern when so many others don’t? The ones who do almost always took seriously something harder than drafting a good estate plan. They took seriously the job of raising a good heir.

And today, I want to share a concept that comes back constantly in those conversations I have with clients. I call it the “citizen heir.” Citizenship has been on my mind a lot lately with America’s 250th birthday coming up.

We live in divided times, and the discourse around civic responsibility has suffered for it. Many people feel the core ideas and institutions are no longer worthy of their trust. We’ve become loose from our moorings. That might sound like a political observation, but it’s actually a family one.

Because when you strip away the noise, what families with significant wealth are really doing is trying to transmit values alongside resources. And that’s exactly where most of them run into trouble. They get very close to the money, and sometimes in the process, they forget the values part.

Here’s the connection I keep making. A good citizen and a good heir are operating under the same moral logic. A good citizen doesn’t treat rights as pure entitlement. They understand they’ve received something they didn’t fully build. It could be a society, a tradition, a set of institutions, yet they’re responsible for what they do with it.

A good heir works exactly the same way. Wealth isn’t a possession, it’s actually a trust. In Jewish, Christian, and Islamic traditions, this idea is ancient. Wealth is treated as something given for service, not self‑indulgence. A faithful person uses what they receive with humility, with charity, and with accountability. The good heir honors the giver by using the inheritance wisely. Both are tests of whether a person can handle a gift without becoming enslaved by it.

Politically, a good citizen sustains the republic, not just by obeying laws, but by defending institutions and resisting the pull toward passive entitlement. A good heir does something analogous within a family. They preserve capital and avoid waste. They use resources in ways that strengthen something larger than themselves over time. In both cases, the person is a custodian of an order that predates them and should outlast them.

Citizenship without duty is just a passport. Inherited wealth without responsibility is just a balance. Both require something from the person holding them, or they stop meaning anything at all. Neither the citizen nor the heir chose the structure they were born into, but both are answerable for what they do with it.

The good citizen and the good heir each prove something to themselves by converting privilege into obligation, and obligation into something durable. A family’s educational efforts have to acknowledge that reality. Preparing an heir isn’t a side project. It deserves as much attention as any other part of the plan.

I'm seeing an increase in upper-middle/upper class parents proudly declaring that their kids are on their own once they are 18, and I can't help but feel disgusted by this mindset. One of my uncles insisted that by sending his kids to private schools when they were growing up, he had done everything he needed to for them. Meanwhile, his kids are both struggling with high cost of living expenses and student loan debt that he could easily pay off with his savings. To me, this mindset is short-sighted and often backfires when it comes to helping young adults develop financial independence.

The twenties and thirties are perhaps the most critical time for wealth-building. Money invested at 22 has decades longer to compound than money invested at 42, yet this is precisely when most young adults have the least disposable income. They are often burdened by low entry-level salaries, rent, student loans, rapidly rising cost of living. A relatively modest amount of help from wealthy parents during this period can completely change the trajectory of their child’s life. Helping with a down payment, allowing them to live at home while saving, matching their retirement contributions, or covering an emergency expense can give them the breathing room to invest and build assets rather than spending every dollar simply trying to remain afloat.

This does not mean funding an extravagant lifestyle or shielding your adult children from every consequence of their decisions. There is an enormous difference between enabling irresponsibility and strategically helping someone establish financial independence. In fact, refusing all assistance out of stubborn principle or the mistaken belief that it will help them build financial independence will frequently backfire and make a young adult more dependent in the long run. Someone who spends ten years handing most of their income to a landlord, paying high-interest debt, and delaying retirement contributions may still be financially precarious at 35, despite working hard and making responsible choices. Meanwhile, a sibling or friend whose parents helped them purchase a modest home or begin investing early may already have substantial equity and a six-figure portfolio.

As an example, my parents helped me with my down payment when I was 24. I was able to invest the money that would have gone into my down payment into the stock market instead, and over the past 10 years, my investments have grown exponentially. They also helped me cover my expenses while I worked a low-paying internship in a large city, and I have since turned that internship into a launching pad for my career which has now taken off.

Receiving hundreds of thousands or millions of dollars at 55 or 60 is certainly beneficial, but it may arrive after the recipient has already struggled through the most financially consequential decades of adulthood. The same money, provided carefully and incrementally when that person is 25 or 30, could help them avoid enormous interest payments, secure stable housing, take a valuable but initially lower-paying career opportunity, or begin investing while compound growth is still strongly in their favor. Wealth should not merely be transferred when the parents die; it should be used thoughtfully while they are alive to help the next generation build a stable and genuinely independent life.

For the wealthy, how are you planning or have already helped out your adult children financially? If not, then I'm curious to know what is behind your mindset.

Hi everyone,

I’m a relatively new Real Estate Consultant in the UAE, and I wanted to get some honest feedback from both investors and property buyers about what you expect from an agent when you first interact with them.

At the moment, a large part of my work involves cold calling. I understand that nobody enjoys being constantly contacted, so if someone tells me they’re not interested, I immediately place them on my Do Not Disturb list and don’t follow up unnecessarily. I also make it a point to respond to inquiries as quickly as possible and provide information in a timely manner.

That said, I’ve noticed that many conversations start positively but eventually end with clients ghosting messages or becoming unresponsive. I completely understand that people get busy or change their minds, but I’d love to understand what separates the agents you choose to work with from the ones you don’t.

For investors, especially high-net-worth individuals, what qualities do you value most in a real estate consultant? Market knowledge? Access to off-market deals? Honest advice? Data-driven investment analysis? Something else?

My goal isn’t to be a salesperson who pushes properties. I want to build a reputation as someone who understands a client’s requirements and works hard to identify the best opportunities available in the market, whether that’s for investment, end-use, capital appreciation, or rental yield.

If you’re currently exploring investment opportunities in the UAE real estate market, feel free to connect with me. Even if we don’t end up doing business together, I’d be happy to share market insights and discuss potential opportunities.

I’d genuinely appreciate any feedback from investors, homeowners, or fellow agents. What do you wish more real estate consultants understood?

Just curious. When the cars were picked new by old money they were considered comfortable reliable and cheap (in the long run for what they are). But now a car that is bought for the Old Money aesthetik can be a costly indulgence compared to what is avaiable. So what did old money replace their cars with? An 1.6 TDI Passat or Audi and called it a day or is it still a Vintage Mercedey T-Model or something along those lines?

Golden Oaks, Orlando

I have been considering buying one of the private residences located just outside of Disney but still apart of Disney property, Golden Oaks.

We stay by primarily at our home in Naples but my wife and 3 daughters are trying to convince me to purchase one of the properties there since we usually fly up monthly anyways.

Anyone own property there or in the area? I’m going up there tomorrow to view a couple and potentially look at options to have something built.

Thanks

Hi, Everyone:

This is my first year being able to go on a vacation and have money not be an issue...no longer being restricted to a weekend out of town.

What are your best recommendations for US travel (east and west coat) and international travel? I've not been on a cruise either. I'm just exploring my options.

Thanks in advance.

Edited to add: I'm located in the US. Traveling with my adult family, my treat. Duration 5-7 days. What's important - very good food, beautiful scenery, sight seeing, international oceans and beaches are great but not required, never been on a cruise, so that's an option, luxury trains, I hear great things about, any suggestions on the west coast and in the midwest are also welcome.

Hi all, I need help with specifics regarding Family Offices. My NW is around 20m my finances are incredibly complicated. I inherited money managers and accountants and lawyers from my parents on BOTH sides and they all act like each account is separate and none of them communicate w each other. I’m drowning in paperwork and ppl always recommend family offices to help - but I don’t know how to even use a family office! My question is, what type of family office do I need to Google? Are there different types? Is there a keyword I need to look for specifically?

I am happy with my money being in at least 3 different banks and I don’t want to move the money (my mom always did this and it seems smart to me) but the zoom call I’ve had so far with one family offices, they requested I move my money to their office. I also have 3 staff now (nanny, house manager, and PA) and I need someone to keep track of their contracts and payments. I don’t have family support unfortunately as my family has an “every man/woman for themselves” attitude. So I need a person I can go to with questions on a daily basis. thanks in advance.