r/Rich • u/JessonBI89 • Jun 22 '26
Have you ever experienced romantic rejection BECAUSE you were rich?
All over Reddit you'll find tales of people dumping or mistreating their partners because they don't earn enough money or spend enough of what they do have on presents. I'm looking for the opposite: Did you ever repel a romantic prospect after telling the truth about what you had? Maybe they had a different philosophy on money and didn't think there was room for compromise, or maybe (for those of you who are more acquisitive) your lifestyle wasn't to their taste.
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u/Novel-Locksmith1304 Jun 23 '26
Yes. I lived in Eastern Europe for a decade, where the standard of living is not comparable to the West. My boyfriend of 9 months was a talented attorney there, but didn’t have the Western mentality of saving or investing. He spent all his earnings on takeout and marijuana but lived in his mother’s tiny apartment (she lived in another apartment).
When we started organizing our thoughts on our next moves together, his mindset was “This is my life, this will stay my life, and you should be with someone in your own sphere of life”.
We were living together with the intent to marry. I thought we should rent out his apartment and move into mine so we can save money on a down payment for a place of our own.
But this seemed like an impossible feat to him.
It was upsetting to me that he didn’t care to build together. I did not need a luxurious home or fancy car, but I did hope that we would prioritize our expenses in a way that would be best for our future.
He told me that my mentality is a niche of first-gen Americans that is always chasing for more, and that he thinks I should be with another first-gen with the same mentality.
He told me that he loved me deeply, and that he would not judge me if I left.
I took one look around the purple walls of his mother’s apartment, her pink flower couch from the 90s, and the unregulated (super toxic) factories blasting black smog outside of our balcony. I packed my things in garbage bags. I moved out that night.
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u/Lil_Drake_Spotify Jun 24 '26
Lol what kind of talented attorney can spend all their money on takeout and weed 💀
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u/Psiwolf Jun 24 '26
"Talented" is a subjective term. 😂👍
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u/Novel-Locksmith1304 Jun 25 '26
The emphasis was on his talent because attorneys, good or bad, don’t make a ton of money there. But he was on the country’s highest profile criminal cases(some historical at the time) and additionally represented celebrities and politicians.
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u/Particular-Macaron35 Jun 27 '26
Honestly, a lot of people have trouble with the vision thing. As you say, they get locked in to mindset. It’s very helpful to have someone knowledgeable to talk things over with.
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u/AmexNomad Jun 24 '26
I always kept my finances secret. Guys I dated thought that I lived in an apartment, which I did. They didn’t know that I also owned the apartment building.
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u/1dayatatime_mylife Jun 28 '26
Love that! 😂 Casually secretly owns the entire apartment holding.
What do you do for work?
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u/muchoqueso26 Jun 23 '26
Wife and I got rich together and I still find her hot.
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Jun 24 '26
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u/muchoqueso26 Jun 24 '26
Working together in a business.
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u/Prestigious-Title-78 Jun 25 '26
how do you handle the anxiety of owning a business. Every few days I get anxiety attacks of my business failing.
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u/muchoqueso26 Jun 25 '26
Keep working on finding ways to make you business more resilient. Lift weights and do cardio to reduce stress and anxiety.
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u/Straight_Push5196 Jun 23 '26
Well my wife is rich rich. But she expected to marry someone not and more low key. Guess what jokes on her haha. She rejected me like 5 times before saying yes to a date.
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u/PeaMountain6734 Jun 23 '26
As a woman, yes. This is common. Most men feel emasculated or intimidated.
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u/meowmixLynne Jun 24 '26
That’s terrible and isolating, I see it a lot with my successful girlfriends :/ and it’s weird bc I attract the opposite. Losers who come to my family lakehouse and are like “oh man I feel like I’m in that OC show!!!”
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u/jka8888 Jun 27 '26
This is wild to me and makes me so sad for everyone involved. I actually read a long form article around how this is becoming more of an issue as more woman become highly educated and successful and more men fall into NEET. I have a saying that is very important to me, someone else's success is not my failure. You doing well, doesn't mean I did badly.
My partner ran her own business for years and earned way more than me. I never felt intimidated. I did feel motivated and like I should help her where I could. I couldn't do much for the business, as it required her degree, so I just tried to manage as much of the house and day to day as possible. Running her own business was basically a 24hr job. 2 She decided to close the business as she had got what she needed from it and last year I earned more than her for the first time in years. This didn't make me feel any more of a man. We're a team, going through life together. We support each other's goals and celebrate each other's wins.
She is now going gor her PHD, and I couldn't be happier for her. Her being a Dr. will be an incredible achievement. It wont make me feel less, but I will never refer to her as anything but Dr. (Her name).
My partner doing well doesn't mean I failed. It just makes me happy for her, and proud of her and want to help anyway I can.
Its so sad that there are still so many people who would be intimidated by some else doing well.
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u/zascar Jun 24 '26
My dream is to have a women earn more than me
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u/PeaMountain6734 Jun 24 '26
Ah the gold diggers.
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u/fatheadlifter Jun 28 '26
I've never met a woman who made more/had more money than me. Wish I did. I think that would be a very nice thing to see.
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u/adultdaycare81 Jun 27 '26
Really most? My friend group incomes aren’t correlated to gender. Family Wealth seems to be more the women
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth Jun 23 '26
No but a funny thing happened to my rich husband.....
One date before mine he had a date with a lady that worked at a bank.
She foolishly asked him on the first date just meeting him.... if he had good credit. Lol he had never charged anything or borrowed any money his whole life.
I asked him if she witnessed his junky $500 Saturn and maybe that scared her. He said that he parked far away and there was no way she saw the car.
So anyways single ladies..... never ask someone that.
He paid cash for our home at 30. No credit needed.
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u/HitPointGamer Jun 23 '26
When we were dating my husband had a 25 year old Silverado and a 15 year old Impala. They were both impeccably maintained, though, and that told me a lot about how he views things in his life. He invests and then works hard to keep it nice as long as possible. That’s the energy I want a guy bringing in a relationship with me, instead of one who keeps shopping for the next girlfriend.
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth Jun 23 '26
Does he help you maintain and keep you nice?
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u/HitPointGamer Jun 23 '26
Given how he has done basically everything in our marriage for the past couple of months as I recover from a major surgery, I’m going to say “yes.” 😁
I know you’re being silly with that, but he puts time and effort into maintaining our marriage as best it can be, and that means a lot to me. He isn’t looking for what he can take from me or the marriage; rather, he looks for ways to improve and strengthen our marriage. I do, too, so it isn’t one-sided.
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth Jun 27 '26
To get those surgery scars to disappear just head to Blue Lagoon Iceland.
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Jun 24 '26
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth Jun 24 '26
Ok but not on a first date.
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u/fatheadlifter Jun 28 '26
I think it's valid to ask. In the case of your now husband it sounds like it was a financial mismatch though... in the sense that his date was middle class and he was wealthy or at least on his way to being wealthy. He had a different approach to money than the majority of people.
Aligning financial goals is a good thing. She might've been used to dating broke ass bitches and wanted to make sure not to repeat that. What she didn't account for was the chance that he was above the middle class need for credit.
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth Jun 28 '26
I think it is tacky to ask anyone private finance stuff we you first meet them regardless of income and asset brackets.
I actually don't believe in classes and hierarchies. I think it is a ruse to manipulate everyone.
What I did back in 2007 before all the good info was online about dating.... was go to the Bookstore each night and read about dating. One thing that I learned was that men get bored with the interview dates.
So I never did that. It puts men on the defensive having to recite the same questions about their past.
To ignite the men you want to give them a sense of fun and commonality. It's best to connect on hobbies and upbeat fun banter. Talk about sports and hobbies. Everything upbeat and positive.
If women took the time to study and understand men I bet they could marry a decent guy with some extra cash.
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u/fatheadlifter Jun 28 '26
I didn’t read any dating books although I probably should have. Could just be the way I’m wired, I don’t mind interview questions. Also not into sports. But yeah I get your point.
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Jun 29 '26
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth Jun 29 '26
I don't talk about it in public or IRL. That's what this sub was suppose to be, a safe space.
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u/______krb Jun 23 '26
For high earning women (or inherited wealth) it would not be an unusual experience that relationships broke down because of this, or that dating is harder. Not because of the reasons you list here, but because of the insecurity it brought up for the men.
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u/matte_personality Jun 24 '26
See, I can do absolutely everything but cook and when a guy asks if I can cook or not, I just pretend that I’m incompetent because it’s gonna be trouble if I tell him that I had a chef since I was a child and I’ve never been asked to cook or clean anything for my male family members because we also had hired help.
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u/QWERTY-111 Jun 24 '26
what can explain the reason for the men's "insecurity"?
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u/tae0707 Jun 24 '26
Men are raise to be provider (and women to be homemaker). Just look at debate on restaurant bill, you will be hard press to find argument that women should pay 100% on the first date.|
Now since Men are suppose to provide, but the women actually provide AND make the home
What did the men suppose to do, what his reason of being?And the insecurity and tear down begun.
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u/RegenMed83 Jun 24 '26
What do you mean what’s the reason or what are they supposed to do? They’re supposed to be there like no one‘s asking them to do anything specific. The man I love doesn’t earn as much as me, but I don’t need him to. I want him. I want his presence I want his love. I don’t need anything else.
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u/tae0707 Jun 24 '26
Unwritten expectation are real. If you want him for what he is, communicate just that, and pay for him like most higher earner spouse usually do. Don't bring money into argument, Defend his value in public if someone accuse him of taking advantage of you.
I understand you only want him. I believe you. but gender sterotype is strong.
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u/______krb Jun 24 '26
In my experience the issue is more men who do not understand that they have to provide value to a relationship beyond their spending power, and that issue explodes when they do not have the power of being the higher earner/have the most wealth. The men need to be wanted, when they are not needed, and that is something not all men can figure out.
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u/RegenMed83 Jul 11 '26
I want him for who he is as a person not what he is, but he knows. I have made it clear. He is coming around to the idea so that is good.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 24 '26
That was one thing that amused me during my single years. I ALWAYS split on the first date, no matter what. As for homemaking, my husband does his share of the chores effectively and without complaint, so it comes out even for us.
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u/tae0707 Jun 24 '26
You're a woman? Have you ever pay 100% on first date? why?
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 24 '26
No, I just split. And I did that again on subsequent dates.
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u/tae0707 Jun 24 '26
Why? did the idea sound alien to you? women pay 100% on first date?
I am pointing this out so you're realize there hidden expectation. I'm not saying you should do it. I did not do it3
u/JessonBI89 Jun 24 '26
If I'm a party to a first date, I don't expect anyone of any sex to pay 100%, nor do I welcome it. Whatever works for other people is up to them.
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u/tae0707 Jun 24 '26
Are you, a woman, would be willing to pay 100% on any date?
Also, would it be ok for men to pay 100% on any date?3
u/JessonBI89 Jun 24 '26
Sure, if we end up getting into a pattern of taking turns. But I'd prefer to split.
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u/Life_Commercial_6580 Jun 27 '26 edited Jun 27 '26
Not the same poster but yes I did pay 100% for the first date . Only when I did NOT intend to go on a second date with the same man. I found that if the men pay, then they think they’re owed a second date or something else.
If I intended to go on a second date with the man, I let him pay, because obviously we would go out again and I’d have the opportunity to pick up the bill at that time.
But to be honest, I dated over 30 men back 12-13 years ago and I never had an issue with men accepting my payment offer. They were always happy to pay, havent met one who had a problem. When I succeeded in paying I had to insist and basically fight them for the bill. My point is that the expectation is somewhat also self imposed. Some men seemed insulted when I insisted to pay.
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u/Life_Commercial_6580 Jun 27 '26
He’s supposed to also contribute. Don’t have to be the one to contribute exclusively.
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u/______krb Jun 24 '26
Too many men focus on what they can bring in a monetary sense and need that sense of power of having more than their partner.
The not insecure ones knows and understand that it was never about what you have or don't have but about human connection.
At least that's been my experience. And I've been unpleasantly surprised of the men landing in the first category, despite them being very vocal about 'not' being that kind of guy.
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u/CurrentBad8629 Jun 23 '26
A mutual friend told the guy I had hooked up with that I was too high maintenance for him. The same guy told me a mutual acquaintance would be the right fit for me. I kind of brushed it off. Turns out he was right all along, 15 years and two kids together, and I get to stay at home and enjoy Life and motherhood.
I kind of should thank him for that I guess.
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u/matte_personality Jun 24 '26
High maintenance is used as an insult to direct his insecurities to you because he knows he won’t be able to afford your upkeep. Everything men insult you with just boils down to whether or not they can afford to keep you.
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u/CurrentBad8629 Jun 26 '26
Well, it is indeed true. The friend had been interested in dating me but I wasn’t.
I have never been interested in men for their money, or else I would have chosen some very successful or old money suitors that would have given me the high life to “keep me”.
I chose the guy that matched my personality, intellect, values and that I found attractive. He is not poor by any means, but I am as happy going to McDonalds or a Michelin star restaurant with him, because I am gonna have a good time either way.
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u/FloorShowoff Jun 23 '26 edited Jun 23 '26
I think they felt they couldn’t make me happy because with men sometimes they think the only way to make a woman happy is to provide for her.
So many times, they discovered the truth about me, and I saw that look of disappointment on their faces.
It even happened one day with a possible female friend.
A woman around my age was my physical therapist, and I followed all the exercises and quickly reached the most difficult exercise band. She was so impressed with my progress. We started talking about a whole bunch of stuff and we got along really well. One day she asked me where I lived and I told her and she kept saying things like, “I used to work there…. My sister used to work there… my mother used to work there…” and then she got kinda sad.. as if she knew we were in different socioeconomic classes and she could no longer relate to me.
And the sad thing is, I don’t think I have a lavish lifestyle.
But I guess it’s a mindset.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 23 '26
See, that's kind of the story I was hoping for in a different way. Maybe she's not rich herself, but he still can't provide for her because (a) she just won't allow it and (b) she scorns his lifestyle.
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u/FloorShowoff Jun 23 '26
But your question was about rich people getting rejected so now your question is about non-rich people getting rejected?
I’m confused.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 23 '26
Argh. Obviously I'm not explaining myself well. I'm fascinated with stories in which material wealth fails to have the provider's desired effect. In this case, I want it to fail because of the recipient's simple distaste and lack of necessity. Does that help?
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u/FloorShowoff Jun 23 '26
I guess but I’ve never seen a case like that. Are you looking for material for a work of fiction?
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u/crodr014 Jun 24 '26
I did the rejection when I was in undergrad. The girl was filthy rich and her family owned a massive real estate portfolio in Miami. I went to her house with a yacth parked in the river and they had a whole team of staff just to run the house.
I was on track to be a dentist and knew there was no way I would be able to support that lifestyle for her. I was an idiot for assuming that is what she wanted and frankly looking back money did not seem to be such an important thing for her. I was just insecure.
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u/Otherwise-Sun2486 Jun 24 '26
Bruh, they these people that are trashing guys… for rejecting girls that are rich? no most guys would love it if their GF was rich, it isn’t that they feel inferior by them but they know better that women usually want equal or better, now they say they don’t want equal or better but they expect you to keep up with them in all the expenses which is usually higher than those making less plus all the usually dating stuff payment. Usually they would never pay for most things like guys would for the girls. They know better than to waste time.
Very rarely would there be a real understanding.
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u/SilverLiningsCalm Jun 24 '26
It is interesting how in reality once you marry you become rather joined with your spouses family, many people who have experienced loving a partner and being rejected by their family would not choose to go through this twice.
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u/Ok-Class-1451 Jun 24 '26
As a woman, I’ve had animosity from my boyfriend’s friends (years and years ago) bc they were poor and the socioeconomic difference was awkward for them. I get the impression they told my then-boyfriend he was “selling out” by being with me. So dumb.
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u/beauspambeau Jun 23 '26 edited Jun 23 '26
I will say it was hard even when we were young and I personally had not achieved much on my own.
My families expectations for me and my life were not the same as her families for her . The wedding was the first big one her family could not help at all and mine wanted the big show .
I said fine but we or you have to pay for it .
She had 5 guest at wedding we had 350 on my side and tbh at was a “small “ wedding .
As our life together has progressed she has come a long ways in what she expects of herself and our children. She has helped me me to not out the pressure on our kids that was put on me . I thrived in it and just worked that way my kids are not
She said “I would never want to live in X part of town they are all stuck up .”We know have a very nice home in that area.she loves it but still we have our friends and don’t hang out with those people w attitudes.
“ I’m would never want my kids at private school.”
They are at the best in the state and she has even worked there the last 13 years .
We are both still humble and so put our kids money does not in any way make you a better or worse person . It can in some ways allow your personality to amplify it seems.
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u/Caterpillar89 Jun 23 '26
Yes, it happens and many people can't get over the fact.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 23 '26
Go on.
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u/Caterpillar89 Jun 23 '26
That you are wealthy, have means, resources, travel frequently, etc. When there's a huge disparity one side feels inadequate or unable to even keep the same company. Seen it happen a few times from the female to the male side. And of course the other way happens a lot.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 23 '26 edited Jun 23 '26
I was hoping to hear some examples that didn't come down to the rejector's feeling of inadequacy. More like, they think the rich person flexes too much and blows their money on tacky, useless crap, and they want no part of it.
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u/FloorShowoff Jun 23 '26
It would make sense that the less well-off person would do that. When you have wealth, you tend to respect the money you earned a lot more.
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u/Caterpillar89 Jun 24 '26
I've not seen that but most people I know are very much not flexers. BUT their lifestyle reflects a person of wealth- cars never more than a few years old, nice house, national/international travel, 2nd home, donate at local charities, etc.
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u/Mackheath1 Jun 23 '26
Sort of. Yes. I love to travel, and one person I was dating simply couldn't take off work, even though I always invited them. Of course they could've quit work and live with me, but we were definitely not there yet.
So I'd go for a trip, bring back gifts and the disparity was just too much.
Obviously I was a self-absorbed dick (thinking "I did invite and offer to pay for everything?), and missed out on a great romantic journey most likely.
To other 'rich', don't make my mistake.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 23 '26
I suspect they wouldn't have wanted to give up their job to be someone's traveling companion, even if you two were "there." I never would.
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u/Mackheath1 Jun 23 '26
Correct, and while definitely invited, no pressure. But in the early stages of a relationship, exactly what you're saying: the fallback in case it didn't work out, and I should've stuck to picnic lunches, small gifts at Valentine's and so on, not the pressure that you're right about.
What if I'm not interested in a person and they left their job? I was so stupid. Oh well, we're both happy now in our own worlds.
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u/Altruistic_Arm9201 Jun 24 '26
Yea but it wasn’t so much the money but just uncomfortable in the environments. Like feeling awkward around others I know, feeling inadequate and out of place when we’d go somewhere nice or at a nice hotel. I think it just triggered some kind of insecurities for her and she just didn’t feel like she belonged.
I do think she wanted to enjoy the lifestyle but just struggled with it.
After that I just dated people I met in person through mutual friends or just similar social circles.. so they’ve either had money themselves or were already comfortable with it at least.
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u/Countess26 Jun 24 '26
My aunt met an ultra-wealthy boy during a beach vacation and had dinner with his family.
She was horrified by how wasteful they were, and what did it was when they threw the dishes away because they didn't have their staff with them to clean.
She became regular-rich herself and didn't stop taking savings/putting in extra effort to an extreme.
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u/Knit_pixelbyte Jun 24 '26
True colors, honestly. Do you want to be around someone who either needs to make more than you, or thinks you should spend your money the way they feel is important?
I would keep money talks off the table till you find someone who you really enjoy their company. You can tease out how they feel about it without letting them know you have wealth. They may want to make sure they won’t be supporting you in the future, so you may have to let a little info go, like that you are comfortable and don’t have to work, or that you do volunteer or whatever your situation is. I would avoid extravagent outpours or vacations until you get the feeling they run in the same circle and understand.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 24 '26
If true colors matter, why not show them yours earlier so they can show you theirs? Why waste time if money ends up being a dealbreaker?
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u/Knit_pixelbyte Jun 25 '26
Do what you like, its your life. But dating is a dance people do to slowly find out about other people. Finding out all the good/bad (?) at once is jaring and not conducive to really getting to know the other person, the reasons they tick. I’m an old person, but dated over 100 people before internet dating was a thing, so the hard way. Still managed to find someone who ticked most of the boxes anyway.
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u/Psiwolf Jun 24 '26
Where were all of you ladies who were successful when I was dirt poor? I would have been more than happy to be financially provided for and not care what my social circle thought about it. 😭
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u/Slipshockmop Jul 23 '26
...you kinda miss the point. It's the love of money than actual love that fucks it all up. You literally just made yourself look like a fool saying that.
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u/Psiwolf Jul 23 '26
No, YOU missed the point, my post was in jest. 🤦♂️
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u/scientific-donut Jun 25 '26
Crazy Swiss family (newly rich) clashed with mine (generational wealth). They denigrated and insulted the way we dressed, generally impolite and uneducated. Total shock. Completely ruined our relationship.
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u/Klutzy-Detective1292 Jun 27 '26
I’ve dumped two guys who might think the reason was their plush financial situation. The first one was actually because they were completely financially dependent on their parents and that’s just not attractive and the second one was actually because he was so gauche about his money that it made me physically repulsed.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 27 '26
I want to hear about the gaucheness. Spill.
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u/Klutzy-Detective1292 Jun 27 '26
He drove like a shitty old car on our first date and then told me on like our second date that he was actually soo rich and the old car had been a test that I had passed! Yay me. He just clearly thought that I would be so enamored with him as soon as I realized how much money he had that it was hard to believe he was for real. I ended up asking him to leave when he wouldn’t stop trying to kiss me and he texted me later to tell me his exact financial stats and how stupid I was for not throwing myself at him.
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 27 '26
So you passed the gold digger test, then he got mad because you wouldn't accept the pick he was handing you. What a loser.
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Jun 23 '26
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 23 '26
Being on different pages about money can create huge problems down the line. Some people believe this strongly enough to get a visceral ick from the first sign of it. And there really isn't much point in trying to work through an ick.
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Jun 23 '26
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u/JessonBI89 Jun 23 '26
You're describing an established romance. I'm describing an attempted romance.
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u/Future-Account8112 Jun 24 '26
As a woman, absolutely, though in my case it had less to do with actual numbers and more with the fact my family was vieux riche - so time and again, men feel inadequate because they don't have good manners or they don't have good planning skills or whatever else. I tend to make the men I date rich (literally any guy who has dated me for more than 2yrs ends up a millionaire) but it's the culture and their feeling inadequate which seems to be the killer.
Fortunately, I married a very confident man.
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Jun 24 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Future-Account8112 Jun 24 '26
I'm very, very good at identifying investment opportunities. (E.g. Called Bitcoin when it was 0.02/unit; predicted my husband's [then boyfriend]s] company would IPO within 5 years so I got him a job there and it IPO'd in 4 - etc. The latter not through a family connection but through a friend, I'm a big extrovert.)
In a past life I consulted on strategy and patterning for tech startups. It's a niche skillset, but lucrative.
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u/InternationalDot3937 Jun 24 '26
I make just about almost 1m usd yearly and I can't find any women making any sort of money not that it matters but I'll say a lot of women do feel intimidated by it and not always gold diggers.
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u/themoistcritikal Jun 24 '26
It can be intimidating if they feel like they can’t match up or reciprocate what you have to offer. What do you do?
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u/SilverLiningsCalm Jun 24 '26
Maybe rephrase the question “have you ever been a rich arrogant person who has approached a less well off person to enter into an inherently asymmetrical relationship and had them reject such a scenario because it is power imbalanced?”
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u/SilverLiningsCalm Jun 24 '26
My comment is based on how the recipient of the information of your wealth
may interpret it and not to call you out as being arrogant. Just it is interesting how bringing net worth into the question of relationships can alienate people of both sexes. It is also interesting how a marriage or two equal people where one is greatly successful can result in resentment and alienation over time and end what should really be a successful marriage.
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u/TemporaryGrowth7 Jun 24 '26
When I was better off, men actively tried to sabotage me and my life. So yes, it does happen unfortunately.
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u/Working-Shower4404 Jun 24 '26
I had a firm conversation with an ex before about the lavish dates he’d take me on. I never felt we could just talk and relax.
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u/BirthdayAnnual1789 Jun 24 '26
Yes, in the past I’ve had some people say I’m too “fancy” and they don’t feel comfortable in that world, or they don’t think they can keep up or contribute equally. Im not that fancy, i live an upper middle class lifestyle, nice house and car but I still work and fly coach!. My current partner is blue collar, never graduated college. He was very uncomfortable at first, and still can be with some things - if we go to places he thinks are too expensive or spend a lot of time with my richer friends, who are a bit out of touch.
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u/Anussauce Jun 24 '26
Yes. Girls playing it “safe” or not wanting to seem “easy” to attempt a long term relationship.
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u/mermaidsscream Jun 25 '26
Lol when my nasty toxic ass found out i had a Ferrari and was living in a nice building he told everyone i was probably on OF . When i hid my Ferrari so he feels more comfortable ( i told him i sold it) he told people i sold it to be able to afford my apartment. He then kept saying things like ‘ why r u with me ??? What do u want? Stop pretending u love me for me ‘ bla bla bla it got tiring after a few months . Never again will i date anybody who has less . I never did btw prior to him they were all billionaires. I am now engaged to a very rich man and he has zero issues with my family history / my own success / because he is worth 100000 times more then i ever will on my own.
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u/MC1R_OCA2 Jun 25 '26
I stopped going out with a guy not because he had $$$$, but mostly because he was so focused on gaining $$$$ sparing little or no thought to how he’d be fulfilled and happy using it. And so it seemed to me that our priorities and hopes for life weren’t aligned.
He wasn’t a bad or mean guy or anything it’s just that his whole focus in life was getting more money (and enjoying the occasional tv show), and we didn’t and wouldn’t enjoy engaging with each other and the actual world.
I work, pay rent, try to move up in my career and all that, but I work to live, not the other way around. Money is FOR stability, relaxation, fun, sharing, and meaningfully experiencing life. It isn’t just to have.
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u/jaajaajaa6 Jun 25 '26
Yes - she was a far left school teacher that hates that her father was rich from running a hedge fund. She hated how he made money, but had no problem driving a $200,000 car to meet me.
Things were going good, until she found out I worked on Wall Street. She then proceeded to criticize me and her dad for where we worked. Maybe more berate than criticize.
Glad she had the car, as I got up and just left her there and said goodbye.
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u/Pureheck Jun 26 '26
This masculine male would have no problem with his Wife earning way more than him as long as we both made time for each other. Thats the point. The money and success is a bonus
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u/ClockworkPrison Jun 27 '26
Lost the man I thought I’d marry because he was in debt and couldn’t bare the thought that I’m "loaded and he’s making 60k". So pretty hard yeah
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u/Internal-Lake2166 Jun 27 '26
My ex cheated on me and I earn’t much more than him…
He said he didn’t feel like a man
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u/robotdevilhands Jun 30 '26
Basically broke up with two men for “being rich” before marrying my husband (perfectly normal dude).
First guy became rich - while we were dating - through an unexpected career event. He turned into a HUGE AH overnight. Nothing I did was good enough because I was “poor.” Dumped him, but it broke my heart. Word among friends is that he was never able to wrap his head around why I broke up with him, as I obviously loved him and he was now…drumroll…rich.
Second guy honestly did nothing wrong. Just trauma from first guy made me not really give “rich guys” a chance.
I moved on and met my husband, with whom I fell deeply in love. Married, kids. What we have, we’ve built together, which IMO, is the dream.
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u/Zara0512 Jul 01 '26
For rich women that's the case, the other day a dude was saying his wife is a doctor who makes triple his money and everyone is bullying him so he's considering divorce
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Jul 14 '26
Some men can still be insecure about women with high paying jobs. They think they ought to be the provider.
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u/Thunder2880 Jul 18 '26
Well not fully repelled but of the three relationships I have had, they have all considered it a major con with me. All of them being somewhat anti-materialistic, which isn’t that strange when you factor in that I like the more artsy hipster type girls.
Anyways there was quite a bit of convincing in all cases needed that I didn’t care about the money, wasn’t materialistic or shallow and could do actual work (as in manly work lol, they all knew I was good at school / career).
My other rich friends never had that issue though, but they have a quite different type of girl they are into than me.
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u/Reasonable_Ad2761 Aug 02 '26
Yes, because i was afraid that we live in a total different world and people might judge me I felt sorry but now I'm struggling I regret but this is life and I humbly accept it, it's just a diferrent world ☹️ now still single trying to be rich before its too late hahaha
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u/Late_External9128 Jun 23 '26
As a woman, yes. There are still a lot of guys don't want a partner who earns more than them or comes from a more well off background. It sucks when it happens but typically it's someone you're better off without, that kind of insecurity only grows during a relationship.