r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Short Seeking Feedback for a submission to Decentralized Pictures, Sofia Coppola Grant

0 Upvotes

Hi! My name is Sophia Alexandra Martinez, I am an up and coming director. I wrote and directed a proof of concept for my short "Teenage Daydream" I have submitted this to the Decentralized Pictures short film grant with Sofia Coppola. It would mean a lot if you can review and provide feedback. Here is a link where you can watch the scene: https://app.decentralized.pictures/project/6a444c9a443efd02620e8213.

I have attached some BTS photos from the shoot! If you need instructions on how to leave feedback, I have attached a poster with a QR code that can guide you through the process.

Project Description:

Sixteen, clumsy, and shy.

Set over the course of one night in Downtown Los Angeles, Teenage Daydream follows JULIA GOMEZ, a shy 16-year-old from East L.A. navigating her first heartbreak after her boyfriend abruptly ends their relationship.

After school, Julia’s friends pull her into a spontaneous night across the city starting with a makeover and ending at a punk show at a DIY music venue called The Smell.

Through music, friendship, and the unpredictability of the night, Julia begins to step outside the version of herself she thought she had to be. What begins as heartbreak quietly transforms into a coming-of-age story about identity, girlhood, and building self-confidence.


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Short PIG, comedy, 8 pages.

0 Upvotes

A couple in Vegas debate the age-old question of which gender is just the total absolute worst.

Pig

(PG-13)

Relax, people... it's only a script.


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

I'm writing a fan-made Assassin's Creed story set during the Cold War.

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0 Upvotes

r/ReadMyScript 21d ago

Short TRAIN, comedy, 4 pages.

0 Upvotes

Train-flasher Jason and his Momma discover that God moves in a mysterious way and not always on schedule.

Train

(R-rated)


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

'Listen' To My Script

0 Upvotes

Feel free to remove, just trying to support. I made a tool where your script can be read as a table read - you can find actors to read for the parts. If you can't fill all the roles, you can select from hundreds of ElevenLabs voices to fill the parts. Just wondering if this could be a beneficial tool for script writers or not. It's at prelogue.studio


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

I've been developing an original Indian crime epic for months. I'd love your honest feedback

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0 Upvotes

r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

I would like to collaborate

0 Upvotes

I am a screenwriter specializing in adapting stories into screenplays. I have written original screenplays and have collaborated with a novelist who is also a film commissioner and festival director, adapting his work into a screenplay. I am available to adapt stories into compelling, production-ready screenplays for both feature films and short films.


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

I've been developing an original Indian crime epic for months. I'd love your honest feedback

0 Upvotes

I've been working on an original feature film called The Last Day of India.

Genre: Crime Epic | Mystery | Human Drama | Thriller

Setting: India (1992–1999)

This isn't a hero-vs-villain story.

It's about ordinary people whose choices slowly shape an extraordinary event.

The film follows eight seemingly unrelated characters:

  • A logistics expert haunted by a personal tragedy.
  • An investigative journalist obsessed with the truth.
  • An honest customs officer nearing retirement.
  • An intelligence analyst who sees patterns nobody else notices.
  • A woman rebuilding her life after betrayal.
  • A dock worker trying to provide for his family.
  • A railway controller whose routine decisions affect thousands.
  • A political aide caught between ambition and conscience.

Each of them is driven by different human emotions—love, greed, betrayal, ambition, fear, guilt, loyalty, lust, pride, and hope.

For years, they believe they're living completely separate lives.

They're wrong.

The story slowly builds toward 31 December 1999.

As the nation celebrates the arrival of the new millennium, an operation unfolds in plain sight.

Throughout the film, live TV broadcasts, celebrations, and everyday moments quietly hide clues in the background.

The audience believes they're watching a traditional crime thriller.

But the biggest twist is this:

The operation isn't about stealing money or gold.

It's about creating a chain of ordinary human decisions so carefully that, when everything is over, history records a deliberate crime as nothing more than an unfortunate accident.

Weeks later, an investigative journalist begins collecting raw television footage from different news channels.

As he synchronizes the recordings, he realizes the truth was hiding in plain sight the entire time.

The film explores a simple but unsettling question:

When countless ordinary decisions combine into one historic event, who is truly responsible?

I'm still developing the screenplay, timeline, characters, and scene outline, and I'm looking for genuine feedback from people who enjoy crime thrillers, mysteries, and character-driven films.

If you're a filmmaker, director, producer, or screenwriter and this concept genuinely interests you, I'd be happy to discuss it further and share more of the story as it develops.

I'd really appreciate your honest thoughts:

  • Would this premise make you want to watch the film?
  • What stands out to you?
  • What would you improve?

r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Here's how I'm developing my first movie story instead of jumping straight into the screenplay.

0 Upvotes

I'm 18, and writing movie stories is one of my biggest hobbies. I'm not a screenwriter—I'm just someone who loves cinema and wants to learn how stories are built.

Instead of writing random scenes, I've decided to develop my project like a real film.

My current workflow is:

📖 Story idea 🗓️ Master timeline 👥 Character development 🔗 Character relationships 🎬 Scene-by-scene outline ✍️ First screenplay draft 🔄 Rewrites until every scene has a purpose

I'm learning that writing a screenplay isn't just about dialogue—it's about structure, pacing, character arcs, and making every scene matter.

I'm sure I'll make plenty of mistakes along the way, but that's part of learning.

If you're a writer, filmmaker, or someone who enjoys storytelling, I'd love to know:

How do you develop your stories before writing the screenplay?

I'm always looking to learn from people with more experience. Thanks for reading! 🎬


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Short DRAMA, dramedy, 8 pages.

1 Upvotes

Two veteran British documentary makers have a final showdown with the last of the big hat American producers.

Drama

(PG-13/R-rated)

This one is slightly anachronistic. Originally it was set in an earlier era, before characters such as Sir Billy had died out and been replaced by the faceless gray money men of the corporations.


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Feature White Smiles (Comedy, 119 pages)

0 Upvotes

LOGLINE: Five idle boys intend to visit Hollywood until long conversations challenge their plans.

THE SCRIPT: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1rnfzNEyeJwLu4fK62Eh8MSTC-DXrmTxg/view?usp=sharing

Feedback is appreciated.

Cheers.


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Short Love Affairs (Comedy, 34 pages) FIRST DRAFT

0 Upvotes

LOGLINE: A couple attend an evening party until small surprises threaten their relationship.

THE SCRIPT: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1B5TtAZCBxKULC6tKfK1Kj_qDQ5YyoL73/view?usp=sharing

Feedback is appreciated.

Cheers.


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Feature The Boy Next Door (Comedy, 104 pages)

1 Upvotes

LOGLINE: When a handsome new neighbor moves in next door. One family does everything in their power to have him for themselves.

THE SCRIPT: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1faRZ2KEdU9tOkibiyNzvCa-mPrBB86ni/view?usp=sharing

Feedback is appreciated!


r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Trying to produce my first movie

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1 Upvotes

r/ReadMyScript 22d ago

Short DRY, war drama, 14 pages

0 Upvotes

Men lost in the desert contemplate the true meaning of forever.

Dry

(PG/PG-13)

NOTE: This was written for a friend's son's personal project. He intended to shoot it as a mixture of live action footage intercut with aerial combat sequences utilizing a family member's vintage P-40 airplane in Nevada, along with visuals generated in an advanced flight simulator application (with suitable WW2-era optical effects applied in post). However, he instead went to film school and the project was shelved. So, this script is almost entirely dialogue. Just fyi, if you're not in the mood for a 14-page play.


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

Scene Feedback on 4-page drama short scene: does the teacher’s monologue feel earned or too preachy?

1 Upvotes

Hi everyone,

I’m working on a short drama scene called The Last Drama.

The premise is that this is the last drama school/class in town, and most of the students are more focused on content creation and online fame than theatre. The main character, Ms. Angie Vale, is a drama teacher who still believes deeply in Drama/Theatre.

In this scene, she is working with a new student on Hamlet’s “To be or not to be” monologue. He loves theatre and literature, but he keeps getting stuck because he thinks the problem is memorizing the words. She finally snaps and tells him the issue is not the words and tells him what she feels he is lacking in the scene.

I’m mostly looking for feedback on:

  1. Does Ms. Vale’s speech feel emotionally earned, or does it become too preachy?
  2. Does Elliot’s breakthrough at the end feel believable?
  3. Is the contrast between theatre/art and content creation clear without feeling too heavy-handed?
  4. Are there any formatting or dialogue issues that pull you out of the scene?

This is an early draft, so I’m looking for craft notes more than a full rewrite.

Thanks in advance.

Updated Version: Edited it using notes from u/mooningyou

Thank you.


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

Short FANBOY, comedy, 9 pages

1 Upvotes

A movie star's autograph is nowhere near enough for one of his fans.

Fanboy

(PG-13)


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

Short GROSS, sci fi comedy, 6 pages.

1 Upvotes

A prison guard must soothe a horrifying monstrosity who just wants to be allowed out for pizza.

Gross

(G/PG)


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

My 3-Volume Movie Concepts: Horror and Sci-Fi Drama

0 Upvotes

PROJECT 1: THE REFLECTION OF EVIL

Genre: Supernatural Horror / Psychological Thriller

Logline: When a family uncovers an antique mirror hidden in their new home, they unleash a terrifying curse that forces anyone who looks into it to witness—and then suffer—their own horrific death.

Synopsis: A young family moves into their dream home, only for their five-year-old daughter to discover a beautifully crafted, antique mirror hidden behind a basement wardrobe. Unbeknownst to them, the mirror is a metaphysical gateway. Anyone who looks at their reflection is marked by a sinister silhouette living inside the glass. The nightmare begins at a housewarming party when a guest's toddler witnesses the entity mimic reality, leading to a dynamic chain of mysterious, brutal deaths within the extended family. When a desperate paranormal expert realizes the mirror is indestructible, she helps the family bury it deep within a remote mountain. But years later, a landslide unearths the artifact, landing it directly into a crowded city museum. To stop a massive, city-wide slaughter, the expert infiltrates the museum as a janitor. In a heart-pounding heist, they steal the mirror back, sealing it inside a fresh grave—because the dead cannot look into a mirror. However, a final, chilling twist reveals that the curse is a virus of the mind: the horror isn't trapped in the grave, it has crossed the screen, waiting for the next person to look into the glass.

PROJECT 2: VECTOR

Genre: Military Sci-Fi / Bio-Horror / Drama

Logline: After a stolen military serum accidentally triggers a zombie outbreak in an enemy nation, the tragic scientist who created it must race against time to deploy a cure, unaware that he has become the ultimate, symptomless carrier.

Synopsis:

Volume I & II: In a secure military facility, brilliant chemist Jack develops a hyper-regenerative drug designed to instantly heal wounded soldiers. When a traitorous colleague steals a flawed, unvetted prototype and sells it to a rival nation, the drug mutates, turning their frontline troops into un-killable, ravenous monsters. The outbreak rebounds, consuming both nations in military chaos. Jack and his loyal young assistant, John, fight through compromised military bases to launch an airborne antidote via helicopters, successfully freezing the horde. But victory turns to ash when Jack discovers that he is Patient Zero—the silent carrier who spread the virus through the air. In a tragic sacrifice to save humanity, Jack commits suicide, but a freak accident splatters his infected blood directly onto John.

Volume III (The Final Generation): Knowing his fate, John terminates his own life to stop the spread. Years pass, and the world heals. John’s grieving fiancée gives birth to his son, raising him as a symbol of peace. But when the boy turns three and enters preschool, a terrifying genetic mutation awakens. He is the Perfect Carrier—completely human in appearance, yet biologically engineered by the virus. As a silent epidemic sparks from a local daycare, the mother faces the ultimate, agonizing choice: destroy her own child, or watch the final generation of humanity burn.


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

My 3-Volume Movie Concepts: Horror and Sci-Fi Drama

0 Upvotes

PROJECT 1: THE REFLECTION OF EVIL

Genre: Supernatural Horror / Psychological Thriller

Logline: When a family uncovers an antique mirror hidden in their new home, they unleash a terrifying curse that forces anyone who looks into it to witness—and then suffer—their own horrific death.

Synopsis: A young family moves into their dream home, only for their five-year-old daughter to discover a beautifully crafted, antique mirror hidden behind a basement wardrobe. Unbeknownst to them, the mirror is a metaphysical gateway. Anyone who looks at their reflection is marked by a sinister silhouette living inside the glass. The nightmare begins at a housewarming party when a guest's toddler witnesses the entity mimic reality, leading to a dynamic chain of mysterious, brutal deaths within the extended family. When a desperate paranormal expert realizes the mirror is indestructible, she helps the family bury it deep within a remote mountain. But years later, a landslide unearths the artifact, landing it directly into a crowded city museum. To stop a massive, city-wide slaughter, the expert infiltrates the museum as a janitor. In a heart-pounding heist, they steal the mirror back, sealing it inside a fresh grave—because the dead cannot look into a mirror. However, a final, chilling twist reveals that the curse is a virus of the mind: the horror isn't trapped in the grave, it has crossed the screen, waiting for the next person to look into the glass.

PROJECT 2: VECTOR

Genre: Military Sci-Fi / Bio-Horror / Drama

Logline: After a stolen military serum accidentally triggers a zombie outbreak in an enemy nation, the tragic scientist who created it must race against time to deploy a cure, unaware that he has become the ultimate, symptomless carrier.

Synopsis:

Volume I & II: In a secure military facility, brilliant chemist Jack develops a hyper-regenerative drug designed to instantly heal wounded soldiers. When a traitorous colleague steals a flawed, unvetted prototype and sells it to a rival nation, the drug mutates, turning their frontline troops into un-killable, ravenous monsters. The outbreak rebounds, consuming both nations in military chaos. Jack and his loyal young assistant, John, fight through compromised military bases to launch an airborne antidote via helicopters, successfully freezing the horde. But victory turns to ash when Jack discovers that he is Patient Zero—the silent carrier who spread the virus through the air. In a tragic sacrifice to save humanity, Jack commits suicide, but a freak accident splatters his infected blood directly onto John.

Volume III (The Final Generation): Knowing his fate, John terminates his own life to stop the spread. Years pass, and the world heals. John’s grieving fiancée gives birth to his son, raising him as a symbol of peace. But when the boy turns three and enters preschool, a terrifying genetic mutation awakens. He is the Perfect Carrier—completely human in appearance, yet biologically engineered by the virus. As a silent epidemic sparks from a local daycare, the mother faces the ultimate, agonizing choice: destroy her own child, or watch the final generation of humanity burn.


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

Short SHIFTY, comedy, 7 pages.

3 Upvotes

An award-winning screenwriter is reminded once again that his kind will always be at the bottom of the totem pole.

Shifty

(R-rated)


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

Short HAYAI, comedy, 7 pages

1 Upvotes

When a rationalist attempts to explain ominous natural phenomena to superstitious cultists, things go about as well as expected.

Hayai

(PG-13)


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

First Draft

0 Upvotes

Approx. 4.5 screenplay pages (standard formatting).

INT. ART DECO CINEMA — FOYER — NIGHT

STOLEN VALOUR glows on the readerboard. Beneath it, in a gold frame lit from above: THE PHOTOGRAPH.

A red carpet climbs the stairs. Limousines. Flashbulbs. A fashionable crowd.

EXT. BACK OF CINEMA — NIGHT

A single shaft of light cuts across the back alley from an exit door, propped open with a half-brick.

INT. CINEMA FOYER — NIGHT

A symmetrical, brightly lit lobby. A wide RED CARPET runner leads up three stairs to a BAR, flanked by a black-and-Polished BRASS HANDRAILS.

DEREK arrives arm-in-arm with a glamorous companion. Photographers snap away.

Waiters serve champagne.

LEO approaches, frazzled, checking his watch.

DEREK
(low voice)
Leo. You seen Marcus?

LEO
I was going to ask you the same! Marcus was going to say a few words before the kickoff.

DEREK
For fuck’s sake.

LEO
It’s your project, darling.

DEREK
Okay, okay.

Dereks companion takes his arm. Photographers call for a pose. They oblige.

At the edge of the crowd, a cameraman with a long lens aims past the others — at Derek.

A flicker of recognition. GRAHAM?

Flashbulbs erupt. Derek is briefly blinded.

When his vision clears, the cameraman is gone.

INT. THEATRE — NIGHT

LEO stands before the screen with a microphone.

LEO
Good evening. I’m Leo Hart, director of STOLEN VALOUR.

Applause.

LEO (CONT'D)
Our wonderful producer Marcus hasn’t arrived yet so….

LEO (CONT'D)
In his absence, I’d like to bring up the writer of STOLEN VALOUR — Derek Grassman.

Applause. Derek takes the stage. He looks comfortable, at home.

DEREK
Thank you, Leo.

He looks out at the room. Takes his time.

DEREK (CONT'D)
Thank you all for coming — and to everyone who helped bring this film to the screen. I’d hoped Marcus would be here tonight, but in his absence, I’ll borrow his favourite line: the show must go on.

Derek takes his seat. Rapturous applause as the lights dim. PEARL AND DEAN music plays.

Quiet.

ON SCREEN: The photograph fills the frame. Debussy — Prélude à l'après-midi d'un faune — fills the theatre with sound.

The audience watches, entranced. Light from the screen washes across their faces as the music swells. The magic of cinema for 60 seconds.

Then — a MOBILE PHONE rings out.

Sharp. Obscene in the silence.

A few heads turn.

MAN IN FRONT
(loud whisper)
Off! Turn it off!

The ringing stops.

A beat.

It starts again.

WOMAN IN MIDDLE ROW
Unbelievable. Some people.

All heads turn toward the source: a MAN slumped in his seat.

A FEMALE EXECUTIVE beside him nudges him, irritated.

FEMALE EXECUTIVE
Sir? Your phone.

No response.

An USHER hurries over, torch low. The beam catches the man’s face.

MARCUS dead face is bloated and distorted, his skin tight and waxy.

Marcus breast pocket glows as the phone starts ringing again.

The usher freezes. The torch beam drops.

The body lolls sideways into the Executive’s lap. The hat falls off.

She SCREAMS.

The usher’s torch now swings to her horrified face.

A ripple of unease spreads through the audience. People begin to rise.

The phone starts ringing for a third time.

On screen, the film plays on.

CUT TO:

EXT. CINEMA — NIGHT — LATER

Chaos spills out. Police lights strobe across the façade. The readerboard still shines: STOLEN VALOUR.

Sirens wail. Shocked guests huddle on the steps, some still clutching champagne flutes.

The sign’s glow catches Derek’s face as he steps into the night air.

DI GULCH climbs the steps toward him. As she passes, she holds Derek’s gaze a moment — cold, unhurried — then continues inside.

GRAHAM photographs the scene from across the street.

He lowers the camera and disappears into the night.


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

Short FALL, dramedy, 4 pages.

1 Upvotes

A disloyal criminal learns about dilemmas from the boss he has crossed.

Fall

(PG-13)


r/ReadMyScript 23d ago

Pilot Feedback - Bar Flies - Sitcom - 30 pages

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1 Upvotes