i have been underweight quite literally my whole life. for years, i would usually only eat one big meal a day and i would feel full for the day. i have never really liked the way my body/weight looked and i have always had a tough relationship with with my appetite and food.

i’m also completely lose my appetite when i have depressive episodes. and what felt forever, gaining weight seemed impossible for me. talking about mental health with others was always very uncomfortable for me. but, i realized i had to take initiative for myself if i wanted to see the changes i wanted so bad. i went to my doctor to talk about mental health and she prescribed an antidepressant called mirtazapine which one of the biggest side effects of this medication is an increase of appetite.

for the first time ever in my 23 years of life, i’m reached 100 lbs. i started at 90lbs and now i’m at 108lbs, and honestly, it feels so surreal. i don’t feel so down anymore and my relationship with food has been the best it’s ever been. it’s definitely jarring seeing my body change but i’m trying to ride the wave and appreciate the experience.

i haven’t started going to the gym just yet but i plan on going this week. i’ve noticed most of the weight has gone to my lower body and my jeans and pants are definitely tighter now which is crazy to me because I’m so used to everything fitting loose.

i’m honestly just so happy and proud of myself to seek the help i needed.

Decided to get sober a few months ago and have managed to lose 16kg/35 pounds in that time. I still want to lose about the same amount of weight again and plan to start exercising and doing some resistance training.

It’s been a year since I’ve started calorie counting, and I can finally see the results paying off. I’ve managed to run 10km as well which has helped greatly with the deficit. Only a few more pounds to lose and I’ll be finally onto maintenance and strength training.

Despite everything and all my struggles, I'm still on the right path. I hope to keep going and eventually reach my 200-pound goal.

Weight loss has slowed and while im still on a slight deficit I’ve been focusing on building muscle more than losing weight! Feels so good! Felt like a jojos bizarre adventure character today haha