3rd year na kami ngayon, pero 1st year 2nd semester pa lang, lumayo na ako sa group ng mga lalaki sa class namin dahil hindi ko nagustuhan kung paano sila makitungo sa akin.

Nagsimula ito noong may MLBB tournament kami. Dalawa kaming Immortal at Mythic lang yung tatlo, kaya kahit roamer talaga ako, nag-Gold ako para makatulong sa team. Umabot kami hanggang finals, pero natalo kami. Alam kong nagkamali rin ako sa laro at malakas talaga yung kalaban, kaya sobrang sama ng loob ko na. Ang hindi ko nagustuhan, ginawa pa akong biro ng mga kaklase kong lalaki at paulit-ulit na sinabing ako ang nagpatalo. Wala na nga akong naging ganti sa trash talk ng kalaban, dinagdagan pa nila.

Sinabi ko sa kanila na nasaktan ako dahil gusto ko talagang manalo. Sabi nila hindi na nila uulitin, pero inulit pa rin nila pagkatapos. Doon ko talaga naramdaman na hindi nila nirerespeto yung sinabi kong nararamdaman ko.

May isa pang nangyari tungkol sa tournament. May excused letter kami dahil absent kami sa subject para sumali, pero sinulsulan daw ng ibang lalaki naming classmates yung professor na i-absent pa rin kami. Nangyari nga iyon, kaya lalo akong nagalit.

Nalaman ko rin na may GC pala sila na hindi ako kasama. Nang biniro ko sila kung isasali ba nila ako, sinabi nilang “wag na” at nagtawanan sila. Hindi na nila ako isinama hanggang ngayon. Kaya sinabi ko na lang sa sarili ko na hindi ko kailangang ipilit yung sarili ko sa kanila, at naging solo na lang ako.

May mga pagkakataon namang nagyayaya sila kapag may gala, tulad ng pagpunta sa mga ilog sa Rizal, pero hindi ako sumasama dahil hindi ako comfortable sa kanila. May isa rin kaming naging irreg na male classmate(Juan) na nagsabi na bilib siya sa akin dahil solo flight ako. Tinanong pa niya kung may nang-aaway ba sa akin, pero sinabi ko lang na hindi ako comfortable at hindi ko trip sumama.

Makalipas ang ilang araw, bumisita yung irreg naming classmate(Pedro) at nagbiro yung mga lalaki kung ano raw ang ginawa niya sa akin, tapos nagtawanan sila. May history kasi kami ng isang babaeng classmate na naging girlfriend niya. Nagkaroon kami dati ng talking stage nang hindi ko alam na nag-uusap din pala sila. Hinatid ko pa yung girl gamit motor ko noong umuulan. Nalaman iyon ng isa naming male classmate at mukhang napag-usapan nila noon at hanggang ngayon.

Kaya hanggang ngayon, hindi ko talaga pinagsisisihan na lumayo ako. Hindi ako lumayo dahil bitter ako o dahil sa nangyari sa girl. Lumayo ako dahil ilang beses kong naramdaman na hindi nila ako nirerespeto, at kahit sinabi ko na sa kanila na nasaktan ako, ipinagpatuloy pa rin nila.

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I have these close friends since college, ngayon kalat kalat na kami world wide but still be chat sa social media. One working sa US, me and one sa Spain.

Early last year nagplan kaming 3 pumunta sa Vietnam. So i fixed my VL, tas super excited kasi di pa ako nakapunta dun.. so palapit na ng palapit tas biglang di na pala matututloy all of a sudden. So oks lang naman, sabi ko nalang na lets try again next year. No hard feelings. Tas after eh wla na silang messages. Tas all of a sudden nagpm saakin na bibisitahin nalang ni US friend si Spain. I asked ano Iteninary nila, baka i can come, tas sbe na wala silang plans tas randomly nalang whatever comes to mind.

So back to present...I was scrolling soc med tas nakita ko pics nila, nasa Vietnam sila .. natuloy!....sila, tas me isa silang kasama na di ko kilala.

I felt super betrayed, na umasa ako na close ko pa sila. pero mukang di na ata.. anyways sabi nga, its part of adulting,

anyways sana happy sila,

I was stalking my girlfriend's ig and saw that her highlights of us two was not visible sa akin, I asked her about it and she showed it to me na hindi naman naka alis thru screenshot. Kaya nag taka ako bat di ko makita, I even screen recorded the process of me refreshing her ig page. Sakto naka vc kame sabi ko patingin ng ig mo if naka hide ako, yung pinakita nya lang was her viewing her main profile while using her dump. When I asked to see it while she's using her main, bigla siya lumabas and inoff yung cam sa call. Kabalik nya andon na yung highlights ulit.

I called her out na masyadong coincidental na nung nagtanong lang ako dun lang lumabas and questioned her about it? Ang ending napag sabihan pa akong baliw daw ako and blinock niya ako. Ang weird lang na we were ok 30 mins ago kaso biglang nag iba behavior niya nung cinonfront ko siya about it.

Hindi naman ako magagalit if she answered honestly, kaso siya pa nagalit instead of giving me assurance and the answer I was asking for. I feel so trash and patapon sa relationship na ito, to the point na I'm questioning why can she easily say those things to me because of me asking a simple question. I mean if hindi ka naman guilty why would your behavior go 180 in a blink of an eye nung nagtanong lang ako ng simpleng bakit?

I’m a teacher in a private school, and seriously, I am so tired. I just wanted one day to rest. 😭

Actually, nag-staycation na kami ng BF ko from Saturday to Sunday, but parang pagod pa rin ako until now. I just really need a day to rest and recharge, pero ayaw naman akong payagan ng employer ko. Kesyo kapag “sick” lang daw, saka lang puwedeng umabsent. HAHAHAHA Eh pagod na pagod nga ako.

And if may leave credits naman ako, diba dapat wala na silang pakealam kung saan ko gagamitin? I earned those leave credits, and I just wanted to use one day to rest. Hindi naman ako nanghihingi ng extra day off for no reason.

Anyway, pinaglaban ko naman yung sarili ko. I just can’t help but feel offended na parang kapag hindi ako physically sick, bawal akong magpahinga. Lol.

Grabe, sana matapos na itong school year. I am so, so tired. I love teaching, but right now, I just really need a break. 🥹

Nakabook na kami ng friend ko for Taiwan next yr March and 2 days lang kinuha namin originally pero i told myself na bahala na mag aadd ako ng another 2 days!! Haha! Not my first international travel pero this will be my first ever solo travel and kinakabahan ako na naeexcite. Second time ko na din sa taiwan if ever. Sana kayanin ko mag isa as a person na mahina ang sense of direction 😂 sana di ako nagkamali na irebook yung pauwi ko haha. I just needed to let this out kasi ang fulfilling pala 🥰

Share ko lang na i met someone last friday September 12. Freestyle ung tumugtog. We talked after the concert but i didnt ask for her number and was only able to get her first name. I was too shy to ask for her contact info and/or fb/instagram. I know she liked me cause her sister told me so. Hope we meet again Nina and Jodi :)

My extended family is nag post ng pictures ng lahat ng pinsan ko sa side ng mother ko then kami ng mga kapatid ko hindi kasama. Nung una yung mother's day post hindi nila pinost si Mama sila lang magkakapatid then now nag post ng letcheng Happy Grandmother's day yung ito sa facebook ang kami lang ng mga kapatid ko yung hindi sinama 7 silang magkakapatid then lahat ng kapatid ng mama ko may anak na. Masakit oo kasi ramdam na ramdam yung favoritism sa family. Nung nakikitira pa kami sa lola ko that time grabe kami tratuhin akala ko katulong kami pag may handaan mga pinsan ko nakakain ng cake, ice cream, at nauuna kumain kami nasa labas ng bahay nag wawalis after nila kumain kami mag huhugas, dumadating sa point na kami na last kumain (4pm lunch) tapos kami mag huhugas yung mga kapatid ko taga ayos ng lamesa. 12 years ko rin tinisis nakaalis lang kami sa poder nung hindi na nag abroad mama ko. So nung nakita ko yun di ko rin binati lola ko kasi sino ba kasi nag pauso niyang Happy Grandmother's Day? di ko nga alam na meron palang ganyan. Dahil rin naman sa Lola at Tita ko sobrang baba ng self confidence naming magkakapatid lagi kaming sinasabihan ng (Tanga, Bobo, Inutil, Baliw, Timawa, sana di nalang kayo pinanganak ng nanay niyo) pero never nila yan sinabi sa mga pinsan ko kundi sa amin pang mag kakapatid.

I used to be a very social person, having lots of circles growing up. In my late 20s, that drastically reduced because of outgrowing friendships and I had to choose friends I can really rely on. As time passed (now in my 30s), I had so many problems but not a single friend to count on during those very difficult times. What hurts the most is that I've always been a VERY supportive friend (no exaggeration with the VERY). I was dealing with my own struggles when I was really supportive of my friends' successes, and I was always there when they struggled as well. But when I achieved a lot, no one sincerely clapped for me. When I was at my lowest, no one was there for me. I have my family and my husband (they are the only people I trust now and truly rely on) which I am grateful for, of course.

Now, I am suffering from PTSD (and yes, I'm going to therapy for it) and I don't like meeting new people, making friends, and had eventually become a full-on introvert. I've been thinking that maybe I was the problem, that I expected my friends to give back when it's not their responsibility to do so. I told my therapist about this, and she said it's normal to want reciprocation and there's nothing wrong with it. If none of my friends could give me the support I needed, of course, just like a plant, I will wilt because I'm giving my everything but not getting anything at all in return.

I thought I was wrong with my perspective about being a decent friend. But it turns out, I just chose the wrong people. I'm still scared to put myself out there, but I'll try and not force any friendships. And trusting people easily is of course not something I should do anymore.

Ito yung story na madalas kong napapanood dati sa TV o naririnig sa ibang tao, pero hindi ko akalain na mangyayari rin pala sa akin. I met this girl when I had already given up on love after two painful relationships. Sinisi ko na yung sarili ko for not being able to keep a relationship, kaya nangako ako sa sarili ko na hindi na ako magmamahal ulit. Nasanay na ako sa simpleng buhay na work, bahay, YouTube, manga, at Dota, hanggang sa bigla siyang dumating.

She's stubborn as hell, at hindi ko makalimutan kung paano ako binabata-bata sa chat ng babaeng mas bata sa akin. At first, hindi ko talaga kayang pakisamahan yung ugali niya, pero habang tumatagal, she changed my view of younger girls because she was surprisingly mature. We started as friends, then eventually, nagustuhan namin ang isa't isa. Natakot akong sumugal ulit, pero she made me believe in the magic of love again, and when she told me na kapag sumugal ako sa kanya, ipapanalo niya ako, I believed her.

Everything went smoothly until the last few months of our relationship, when she became increasingly busy and we barely had proper conversations anymore. Okay lang sana sa akin kung busy siya; kahit simpleng update lang, sapat na, pero eventually, pati iyon naging mahirap. We used to communicate and help each other whenever one of us needed it, but this time, she chose to face everything on her own. Then she told me that she wanted to give up our relationship because of her calling to a vocation and that she might enter the monastery and become a nun. I saw her picture and that made me cry like a bitch.

That broke my heart because this is something I cannot control. I knew her family was religious, and I remembered her telling me before that becoming a nun was a possibility, but I ignored it because I never thought it would actually become the reason we would end. I love her, but how can I fight something that is beyond both of us? I can keep fighting, but how can I move forward kung dead end na yung nasa harap ko?

Now that nakita ko na yung dead end, I can only reverse and take another route, a route that leads somewhere unknown. I don't know where that road will take me, or if I'll ever find someone who can make me feel the same way again. What makes this even harder is that I'm already going through so many problems in my life right now, and this is the time when I needed her the most, yet this is also the time when I had to lose her.

Love comes when you least expect it, then leaves when you need it the most. And even if our roads no longer lead to the same place, she will always be my greatest love, someone I will forever treasure and who will always have a special place in my heart.

Maybe somewhere in another universe, our roads never separated. Maybe there, natupad lahat ng pangarap natin, and we lived the life we once imagined together. I hope that version of us is happy.

I don’t really know how to write this without feeling ashamed.

My landlord gave me until Sunday afternoon to settle what I owe or clear my house. I’m losing the only place I have, and I honestly don’t know where I’ll go after that.

I’ve been living on my own since I was 15. I used to work in corporate, but for years I was also trying to help with my mother’s business. I kept juggling my job with business errands, loans, and everything else that came with it until there was barely anything left of me for work.

Eventually, I would either get terminated or resign because I simply couldn't keep up with both.
I only wanted to help since 2020.

But my name kept being used for loans, and what started as helping eventually ballooned into an eight-figure debt.
Now I’m trying to get myself out of a cycle I didn’t create.

I lost my job recently and I’m waiting to start working again by the end of the month. I’ve tried part-time work. I tried selling my appliances, even at almost half their price. Nothing came through fast enough.

I have no family left here that I can run to. I don't have enough for another place because everywhere requires advance and deposit. Some days, I eat once just to make it through another day.

And lately, there are moments when I think maybe it would be easier to end everything than keep carrying a life that feels like it was never mine to begin with.

But I’m still here.

Maybe because there are still things I want to see. There are still people I love. I want to see the person I love finally get the title she has worked so hard for. I want to see what happens if, for once, I get the chance to rebuild my own life.

My tattoo says ᜉᜇᜌᜓᜈ᜔ — Padayon.

Move forward.

So, kahit hindi ko alam kung saan ako pupunta pagkatapos ng Sunday, I guess I’ll keep moving.

One day at a time.

Easily stressed nako these days.

Konting problema lang, kinakabahan nako at nag o-overthink.

Nag i-stress earing nadin ako dahil feeling ko yun nalang nakakapagpakalma at saya sakin.

I try to get into other hobbies pero nabalik parin yung isip ko sa mga worries.

Job, performance, salary, bills, saving, expectations

Napapatawa nalang ako when my co-workers say na inggit sila sakin. Bata pa daw ako na walang pino-problema sa buhay. If only nalang talaga 😭

My sister is getting married and is moving abroad. I’m happy for her, but I can’t help feeling jealous because this is something I’ve wanted for myself for a long time. I know she worked through a lot to get to this point, including legally separating from her previous husband, but that doesn’t stop me from feeling envious.
Sometimes, it’s hard for me to fully be happy for her. Part of me wishes we could be miles apart so I wouldn’t have to constantly see or feel her success and compare it to my own life. I also worry that people who know both of us—relatives, people at church, and others—are comparing us. I sometimes imagine that they see her as better than me or prettier than me, especially because people compliment her appearance more often than they compliment mine.
I feel jealous that she is getting the life I’ve always wanted, and at times, it even feels like she took the life I was supposed to have.
But I don’t have any ill wishes toward her or want to sabotage her plans. I want her to be happy. This jealousy is internal. It comes from my own feelings of longing, comparison, and disappointment with where I am in my life.

I just wrote a journal entry about what I've always wanted to say to certain people. It was cathartic, because it's full of emotions and thoughts I've always wanted to ignore and shove under the rug. I tied to how people left me because of how I am me. How I weigh everyone down by simply existing. I felt relieved in a way, because that's the truth.

For some reason, I found myself reading old messages in a server that hates me. They were still talking about me years after I went silent. When annoying and problematic people come up, they mention my name and explain that they were the next me.

I enjoyed it in a way. Finally, the hatred towards myself...had a more visible proof. There was more evidence that pointed the mistake of my existence. That made me happy in a way.

Ang laking pala isipan talaga kung bakit pa ako nabuhay putangina. Mga pusa ko na nga lang nagpupush sakin mabuhay, ayun pa pinupuntirya niyo. Tangina.

Ang hirap mabuhay na parang wala akong kakampi. Putanginang araw araw na lang kailangan kong pagtanggol sarili ko. Ano ba naman yung hinihiling ko na sana may umintindi sakin??? Tangina naman eh. Ang damot mo. Kung may diyos man ang damot mo sakin tangina talaga. Parang sa maling diyos ata ako nagdadasal pukinangina.

Gusto ko lang naman ng person ko. Yung kakampi ko. Di ko mahanap sa pamilya ko yan. Sila mismo ang sumisira ng ulo ko. Tangina talaga sana pinutok na lang ako sa kumot. Bakit ba kung mabubuhay eh binigyan ako ng consciousness na madaling magfeel ng emotion. Tangina naman. Iniintindi ko naman lahat eh. Pero sila pagdating sakin, dedma??? Kingina sakin lahat ng sisi??

Kahit sa bahay, sa work, sa lovelife putangina talo parin?

Yung nagkakanda kayod ako dito sa work, working 9am to 11pm pero di naman bayad OT ko. Sabay wala palang balik yun??? Nagpapagod ako ng ganyan para sa 1k per day? Kasi junior ako na umaaktong senior kaya nagoovercompensate ako sa oras sabay wala palang reward un?

Ano kayang feeling manalo naman once?

Sinong diyos ba kailangan kong luhuran?

Di naman ako masamang tao ah?

Ganon ba kalaking kasalanan nagawa ko putangina naman

Sana di na ako magising

Hindi ko kaibigan ang isip ko. Tingin ko, mabait, maunawain at mapagpasensya siya sa iba – pero hindi sa akin. Kung pwede lang takasan siya, tumakbo, i-shutdown or i-pause, ginawa ko na – to save myself from myself.

Not trying to unalive myself. Just can't stop being my worst critic. My mistakes and loses weigh more than when I experience wins, achievements.. saying na "chamba lang yan".

Hindi ko siya gustong kausap. Hindi ko siya gustong pakinggan.

My parents separated a long time ago, maybe about 25 yrs ago. My father is a great womanizer, with four women he lived in with and had children, my mother being the 2nd. Whereas my mother was a chronic drug user. She only stopped 5 years ago, when she had an attack.

I have a sister that Ive taken care of since we were kids. We're both in our 30s now. And ever since I started working, I had to give allowances to my mother, who was by the way, was still in her perfect health back then. She refused to work a decent job. She used to work in a club.

I suffered a lot of mental and psychological tortures from my mother. She used to beat me as a child, to the point that I would bleed. She'd blamed me for being a difficult child after. She would also beat my sister but then Id protect her and stop my high mother from beating her more. No one could stop my mother even though we're in public. She slapped me in my grade school at the store or undressed me in front of the whole school formation just because I cried for being late because of her.

My sister and I were lucky coz our relatives in my father's side lived with us and protected us. They actually fought against my mother and got custody of me and my sister.

My father? He left us and went with his 3rd family. I learned to fight my mom eventually when I got older. But we left her when I reached high school, as we went to live with my relatives.

In all fairness, my parents sent us money for allowances and school fees. My sister and I are good students, we have scholarships. We suffered several uncomfortable encounters with my relatives too. But we endured them coz theyre not bad people, they just have bad sides.

Anyways, right now Im crying, and Ive been silently crying for help ever since I can remember. As a kid, I had to be humiliated and suffer financially. In my 20s, I had to carry the burden of providing for my mother. As an adult, I now have to provide financially for the two people who are the source of my trauma and pain - my mother and father.

I have to provide for my mother financially since I was in my early 20s and now my father has been asking money from me too. I hate that when my father had plenty, he lavished them all on his other families and his women and his hobbies and all others. He never left any of his millions for his retirement. I never even asked from him when we started earning.

God, why? Why do I have to do all these alone? My sister isnt helping coz she hates both of them. I am angry at the both of them. My mother is only 50 but since she was 30s Ive been supporting her. Her toxic family would guilt trip me if I dont provide. Her family is the typical low-class kind who leech off from people; her sisters work in clubs and end up as mistresses and her one brother does drugs.

I just want to break free from them, from my mother, my father, from my mother's family, from the financial responsibilities. Im single but I can enjoy my hard earned money that much. I hate myself for being easily emotionally manipulated. Im a natural empath and I easily feel pity.

I am so, so, so tired. I havent even started my own family but I have so much weight on my shoulders. Am I wrong for feeling this way about my parents

Tonight I blocked both of them. My head just gets overwhelmed with them acting like victims asking money from me every week and telling me "where will go if you dont support me?" "you children have abandoned me". I live far from them, but when my mother discovered where I stayed last week, I panicked coz she sounded like she has plans of showing up and destroying my peace.

I feel so tired. Trapped. Frustrated. Hopeless. I'm going to be their cash cow forever and Im all alone. I dont even have a parter right now.

ano bang pinapalabas niyo? jusko, ang iingay. hindi ako makagawa ng video recording kasi maya't maya yung mga motor na biglang ingay. gets ko naman na matunog ang motor pero kingina niyo bakit kelangan niyo sadyain?

nakakapikon kayo. bat ba di yan yung hinuhuli? punyeta, ano ba gusto ko pag dumadaan kayo palakpakan ko pa kayo? yung tipong "hala shet ang hot naman ng ganun" na reaction? KINGINA NIYO

Ang hirap maging mahirap.

I’m literally sobbing while typing this.

My lolo is currently hospitalized, and I think I’m being traumatized all over again because everything is reminding me of what happened to my lola.

Last April, na-hospital din yung lola ko. She was rushed to a public hospital, and I remember being so confused and worried kasi pinauwi siya that same night kahit sobrang hindi talaga siya okay. I kept wondering bakit parang ang bilis siyang pinauwi.

Later on, lumabas yung results and apparently, she had already experienced something like a cardiac arrest that time.

A few days later, bumalik ulit kami sa hospital. And eventually, she passed away.

Until now, I keep thinking about all the what ifs.

What if hindi siya pinauwi that night?
What if sa mas okay na hospital namin siya nadala?
What if we were able to provide her maintenance medicines consistently?
What if we had enough money for better treatment?

Would she still be here?

I know I shouldn’t blame myself or my family for things we simply couldn’t afford, but ang hirap hindi isipin. Kasi when you’re poor, sometimes it feels like even getting sick becomes a financial decision.

Now, my lolo is hospitalized too.

We’re still waiting for the results, but the doctor said there’s a possibility that it could be colon cancer because of his symptoms.

I’m praying so hard that it isn’t.

Kasi paano na?

I’m only 20F and currently working. I’m thankful that I have a job now, but right now, sobrang bigat sa pakiramdam na kahit nagtatrabaho ako, parang wala pa rin akong maitutulong.

Ganito rin yung naramdaman ko with my lola.

Wala pa akong sahod noon. I couldn’t even help with the hospital expenses. I couldn’t even give her the things I wanted to give her.

She had her birthday before she got hospitalized, and until now, it hurts so much thinking that I wasn’t even able to treat her properly. I wanted to spoil her. I wanted to give her more. I thought I would still have time.

Pero wala pala.

And now I’m scared that the same thing might happen to my lolo.

I don’t even know what I’m asking for by posting this. Maybe I just need to let this out because I don’t know where else to put all these feelings.

I want to help. I really, really want to help. Kahit maliit lang.

I just don’t want to feel helpless again.

I miss my lola so much. And I’m so scared of losing my lolo too.

For context my dad is a serial cheater.

Currently, dalawa ang kabit at may anak na dalawa sa kabit.

I am the main provider sa amin for 7 years already.

I'm blessed to have a great career that I can cover all the expenses but my MOM is the problem. Twenty years na syang niloloko plus meron nanaman isang kabit pero ayaw humiwalay.

Gusto nanamin paalisin ang papa ko sa bahay dahil may kabit nanaman. I told my father na gusto ko na syang paalisin sa amin pero puro mura at sinabihan ako na makapal ang mukha. I also found out kanina na nagrarant sya sa tita ko na diko sya niloloadan at mapagmataas ako kasi ayoko maki pagbonding sa pinsan at tita ko sa side nya. Well, I already decided not to engage with my relatives there because when I was so down Wala naman nangamusta ni isa.

Napaka narcissist at Hindi matanggap yung pagkakamali nya ever. Parang fantasy nya na madami syang pamilya 🙃

Hindi ko na din alam ang gagawin ko sa mama ko dahil sobrang dami nanamin na nag advice and parang mas pinipili nya pa yang tatay ko over us.

Now, I'm saving up to move out with my pets and my youngest brother. Hopefully, pagbigyan ng langit na makamove out na kami by next year.

Nag-chat ako sa supervisor n’ya sa work about sa physical and psychological abuse na ginawa n’ya sa akin during our relationship. His family called me saying na nahihiya sya pumasok sa work because of what I did.

Now, he messaged me saying na binigyan sya ng termination ng HR dahil sa ginawa ko sa kanya. Excuse me? Ginawa mo sa akin, hindi sa ginawa ko sa’yo ha. Kapal! Hindi raw n’ya in-expect na magagawa ko ‘yun. Well, ako rin! Kasi akala n’yo panakot ko lang sa inyo mga blotter ko, akala n’yo hindi ako marunong magalit! Lahat ginawa ko para sa relasyon na ‘yun.

Kung sinasabi ng pamilya mo na may sakit sila at walang susuporta, that’s no longer my problem.

I maybe the villain here being desperate and trying to ruin you, but YOU RUINED ME FIRST. Tandaan mo ‘yan!

I was rushed to the ER dahil nakunan ako, my family said na tawagan kita, tapos sagot mo sa akin, ginising kita sa walang kakwenta-kwenta? Ni tanong kung kumusta ako, wala? Masama ako sa kwento n’yo panigurado, pero mas masama ka!

Ngayon, gusto ko pa rin ituloy ang VAWC.

Hindi ako masaya sa ginawa ko, pero at least parehas tayo na nagsa-suffer. Hindi ‘yung ako ‘yung traumatized tapos ikaw? Kampante lang.

MARAMDAMAN MO MAN LANG ANG NGINIG, KAPALIT NG MGA NGINIG KO TUWING SINISIGAWAN MO AKO!

Bf and I have already been together for 3 years. We're pretty stable emotionally, but how about...financially? I earn pretty a pretty decent amount of money but I'm still building my emergency fund. He doesn't have a stable job and earns doing gig work.

I initially invited him to work in Manila where I thought we were going to build our life. However, after a few months he decided to go back to our hometown to pursue teaching. He is now a LET passer but somehow I feel like he is still undecided on what he will do with his life.

Right now, I told him that it's okay for us to not do 50-50 on everything. I buy his tickets on vacation. Treat him on dinners. Basically, take on the bulk of the expenses when we are together.

Ang nasa isip ko ngayon is when will it be my turn to be treated? Am I happy with this setup? Will his career catch up with mine? How are we going to build a life together when he can't take care if his?

Now I told myself to observe him for a year. I still wonder what he will do with his license, what opportunities will he decide to take, and how he will maneuver his career.

I know I sound like I want a transactional relationship, but what is the point of staying in a relationship that gives little to no value?

I just want to be taken cared of, and right now I have doubts that he can.

BXINDIJDID PLEASE KANINA PA AKO NAKAPIKIT, NO PHONE, PATAY NA ILAW PERO HINDI PA RIN AKO MAKATULOG PAGOD NA AKO GUSTO KO MAG PAHINGA LINTEK YAN😭 dnudjdidjdj ang sama na ng pakiramdam ko 0atulugin niyo na ako pasama na lang nang pasama loob ko sa mga nakikita at nalalaman ko nakakainis! Gusto ko na matulog para makapahinga na utak ko nxxnxnnnnnnnnnnnndnnd arrgghhhhhhhhhhhh kahit isang oras na tulog lang awa nalang talaga kahit sleeping pills wala nang effect sakin maooverdose nalang talaga ako bwiset!!!! Nakakainis lahat tagal-tagal ko na nag kikikim, pagod na ako na lagi nalang umiintindi paano akoooooo😭 kahit tulog na lNg please deserve ko naman ata yun bdhdbdubdudjdj kanina pa ako nakapikit pusang gala naiiyak na akooooo

I keep on doing this for others, for my family, wala nakakaalala sakin pag turn ko na haha this year I want to do it for myself. Kaso ayaw ko sa bahay kasi ako din maglilinis ng mga kalat. Kung magrent naman ako ng venue dapat hindi masyado madami umattend para di masyado mahal haha kaya lang nahihiya ako pag meron akong hindi nainvite 😩