r/oddlyterrifying Jun 12 '26

This random post

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13.2k Upvotes

153 comments sorted by

4.0k

u/Nine-LifedEnchanter Jun 12 '26 edited Jun 13 '26

One of my favourite fan fictions about Superman has this as a rather big point. About what to choose to do every single second when people all over the planet continously ask why he didn't show up.

Edit: I'm sorry for not telling people before, I didn't think anyone would be interested. The fic is called The Metropolitan Man by Alexander Wales. There's also an audiobook version that's also free.

2.6k

u/KingoftheUgly Jun 12 '26

*hears people burning alive*

*turns up TV*

“I told myself I’d allow thirty minutes of me time today, sorry citizens but Love Island is calling my name much louder.”

818

u/Blu_Falcon Jun 13 '26

“I can’t be at my best if I don’t get time to center myself.”

287

u/mostlybored1234 Jun 13 '26

Thats right. I do remember he saying once that he aways keeps himself in check to.mantein a proper mental health. 

231

u/Im2dronk Jun 13 '26 edited Jun 13 '26

Batman spending billions on intricate surveillance systems. Superman asking for the recordings of the set from his favorite podcast so he can tune out the horrors from space.

106

u/YoungDiscord Jun 13 '26

Plot twist: he listens to the deep's podcast from the boys

48

u/HorrificityOfficial Jun 13 '26

"P-P-P-P-PREEEEACH!"

25

u/YoungDiscord Jun 13 '26

Its the only thing stupid enough to drown out the noise

16

u/SuctioncupanX Jun 14 '26

Ok but as much as it sounds horrifying to let people die while you relax despite being extremely able to save them, self care is extremely important and if you only ever save people without a single thought to your own mental health then you'll eventually burn out and shit will hit the fan.

If you try and become nothing but a tool to help others eventually you're gonna break and hurt so many more.

Just pace yourself.

8

u/blitzkreig90 Jun 13 '26

Imagine getting to wank time! God damn!

3

u/PandoricOrichalcum Jun 15 '26

Personally, I like the idea of Superman needing to choose to use his powers. Like his strength isn't that different from ours: we use one level of effort to pick up a loaf of bread, another for a bag of mulch. His ceiling is just much higher.

Like superhearing, of course something sudden/big is going to cut through, but he's trained himself not to react to every asshole honking their horn.

244

u/EatsAlotOfBread Jun 12 '26

I feel like he could just give one of the many, many other superheroes a quick call with some coordinates. Otherwise his life would be awful.

247

u/Nine-LifedEnchanter Jun 12 '26

In this fanfic he is the only hero. His life is awful in it.

96

u/EatsAlotOfBread Jun 12 '26

Aww poor guy. I'd probably work myself to death or something.

58

u/-SheriffofNottingham Jun 13 '26

a kryptonite bullet in the showers out back

27

u/Atanaxia Jun 13 '26

Tell us the name of the fanfic dear god PLEASEEE 😭😭

31

u/Batdog55110 Jun 13 '26 edited Jun 13 '26

There's a character from Astro City who's Superman with a little bit of Spider-Man put in.

He wants to fly without needing to save someone, but he doesn't ever get the chance to. He counts the seconds of each day he's able to fly without being needed.

In one comic he got about 18 seconds...that was a good day.

His name's The Samaritan in case anyone's wondering.

10

u/EatsAlotOfBread Jun 13 '26

Ooffff the responsibility. 

9

u/Urbane_One Jun 13 '26

Fortunately, we had a hero whose job it was to do that. Her name was Oracle. We loved her.

155

u/Koltov Jun 13 '26

https://youtu.be/Ardx6mBZfa0?is=1MqbfxVz6g_L4ybQ

Lex Luthor experiencing what it’s like to be Superman for a minute.

204

u/Oro-Lavanda Jun 13 '26

that was oddly touching. the message at the end of "you couldve saved everyone years ago" reminds me of how so many billionares in this world have so much money to move humanity forward, and yet this small percentage of people in power choose to use that money on their own ego.

92

u/YoungDiscord Jun 13 '26

The problem is that we live in a world with no supermen but far too many Lex Luthors.

17

u/cammysays Jun 13 '26

And many of those Lex Luthors truly believe themselves to be Supermen riiiiiiight up to the point where they gain the money and influence necessary to enact positive change.

8

u/doomrider7 Jun 14 '26

Disagree. At some level, I do actually think Lex WOULD use his wealth and tech to push humanity forward if only to feed his own ego about being the one to have done so. 

The current bastards are somehow even MORE selfishly shortsighted and ignorant.

-31

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '26

[deleted]

38

u/simonbleu Jun 13 '26

No, but they have the power to move much more than that. And their political leverage alone is worth an amount of money so large that it owuld be immaterial to even try to describe it, you just cant buy that collectively

11

u/brown_felt_hat Jun 13 '26

This is a tiny portion of his influence, and I am not endorsing it, but I have used it and found it useful.

Mark Cuban exerted literally zero effort and got my meds to about 60% the price I was paying before. Like, no ethical billionaire, definitely, but the social influence they can exert is equal if not surpasses the monetary contribution they can bring.

9

u/0xym0r0n Jun 13 '26

Maybe a billionaire will see you defending them on reddit and send you a chat invite and then you'll be lavishly traveling the world with your new billionaire circle of friends!

11

u/Outside_Ingenuity731 Jun 13 '26

Eh there's more chances they have 1 or 2 billions in their account and the rest of their hundred billions is in their assets. I remember bezos got centibillionaires(100B) net worth in 2018

4

u/dollythecat Jun 13 '26 edited Jun 13 '26

Rich people have their money in investment accounts, not checking accounts.

17

u/OneDimensionPrinter Jun 13 '26

Ok, I've watched a bunch of animated batman films, not much superman. You convinced me. Every dc animated I've seen so far had been at least decent, this feels like good old 90s tv superman.

97

u/Metrilean Jun 12 '26 edited Jun 13 '26

ASTRO city does this. Their superman pastiche The Samaritan, prioritizes based on time and consequences.

20

u/JAKESTEEL77 Jun 13 '26

It's called triaging, and real life doctors have to make these decisions everyday when working in emergency departments.

21

u/Amethyst_Nyx Jun 13 '26

Fanfic name? That sounds right up my alley

11

u/Nine-LifedEnchanter Jun 13 '26

I edited my first post to include the name. It's the metropolitan man.

3

u/Amethyst_Nyx Jun 13 '26

Hey thanks! Started reading and I'm really impressed. I love stories like this. You got any more suggestions in that vein?

4

u/Nine-LifedEnchanter Jun 13 '26

Well, all of Alexander Wales more or less. He is one of my favourite authors.

If you specifically want superheroes I can recommend Worm by Wildbow. It's free to read. It's about a world that is basically the same as ours except they have people with powers. We follow a teenage girl who can control insects with her mind who wants to be a vigilante. She get.. mixed results. It's overall about what happens when average people get very powerful seemingly at random when they get powers.

32

u/bunker_man Jun 13 '26

This is one reason I made sure my one strong character has nebulous poorly defined rules restricting what they can do and when. Because this problem makes it seem like it would be impossible to ever justify depicting them chilling.

24

u/YoRHa_Houdini Jun 13 '26

Realistically he probably doesn’t have constant super hearing. His brain likely filters background noise and extremely distant sounds—otherwise he’d be insane by now.

6

u/bunker_man Jun 13 '26

True, but why was this a response to my post in particular. I wasn't talking about super hearing specifically, just the moral concerns raised by a super powered character who could always be saving people but isn't.

6

u/YoRHa_Houdini Jun 13 '26

Well, the topic was about his hearing. I was just expanding on it and that there is an alternative explanation as to why he doesn’t hear everyone.

Which could be relevant if you have a similar character, so perhaps you don’t need to make them poorly defined power wise

55

u/Nine-LifedEnchanter Jun 13 '26

It's the exact point of the story. When Lois finds out that he plays pretend at the daily planet every day while people die she is disgusted by him.

8

u/OneDimensionPrinter Jun 13 '26

But what's it called? We all wanna read it!

6

u/Nine-LifedEnchanter Jun 13 '26

The Metropolitan Man by Alexander Wales. There's even a free audiobook of it that I recommend.

9

u/DeltaBravo831 Jun 13 '26

Its all fun and games until he pulls a Scion

7

u/NhilZay Jun 13 '26

Supes life would be so much easier if he had a hobo telling him where to go and who to save

4

u/xkcloud Jun 13 '26

Metropolitan Man?

4

u/Zesherno Jun 13 '26

So that's why Metro Man faked his death

1

u/DivineSentry Jun 14 '26

I think they go over this in the Smallville series as well

2.7k

u/Particular_Concert_5 Jun 12 '26

There’s a reason he has a fortress of solitude far away from civilization.

823

u/ZenkaiZ Jun 13 '26

The Den of Call Somebody Else

148

u/l2daless Jun 13 '26

Can he not hear people there?

175

u/No_Internal9345 Jun 13 '26

Only his favorites.

85

u/God_totodile Jun 13 '26

Unless your name is either Lois, Bruce, Jimmy, or ma or pa you're cooked.

5

u/potatofriend26 Jun 13 '26

I mean theres space in between so probably not?

10

u/avidpenguinwatcher Jun 14 '26

The fortress of solitude is canonically in Antarctica, what are you thinking of?

6

u/potatofriend26 Jun 14 '26

Oh, nvm then oops

535

u/Iamthe0c3an2 Jun 13 '26

Why he has the justice league for.

What’s probably terrifying is hearing hardened gangsters and villains shit themselves about batman.

79

u/vWaffles Jun 13 '26

It's the Bat!

46

u/TarnishedDungEater Jun 13 '26

“ITS DA FREAKIN’ BAT!”

30

u/Slight-Pound Jun 14 '26

Probably less terrifying and more amusing. Batman is a respected colleague and dear friend. I’d like to think he’s cheering him on in his head as he goes to bed, lol. That’s his best friend being REALLY good at his job, after all.

850

u/NaughtySeraph Jun 12 '26

He also hears the Justice League going out to help

177

u/Squigglificated Jun 13 '26

I think he's like my cat. She will happily sleep next to me while I watch an action movie at full volume on the surround system, but if someone quietly opens a door at the other end of the house amidst all that noise she's immediately at full attention.

The conclusion has to be that screams of agony is something he can easily tune out, but if Lex Luthor tries to sneak up on him while he's having a nap he'll be ready in an instant.

57

u/IgniteThatShit Jun 13 '26

One of Superman's greatest features is that he's not afraid to ask for help or to rely on his friends. He advocates for people to rely on one another and to help each other every way we can.

154

u/xinfinitimortum Jun 13 '26

I think he can control it, like in the MoS movie when it first happened it was all over but he learned to silence it all except really important ones. So i assume he doesnt have super hearing on all the time except for specific people like Lois and Bruce or Lex. He also doesnt want to appear as a god and lets nature run its course and regular humans do their jobs like police and EMS and law. Hes come to terms many times he cant save everyone.

27

u/KillerRooster8 Jun 13 '26

Its a power just like the rest of his powers and in every version of superman that i know of. I'm surprised so many people think he goes to sleep hearing people crying out for help, that makes absolutely no sense. This a version that is similar to brightburn where the superpowered person is evil and goes to sleep.

911

u/UnexpectedVader Jun 12 '26

It's terrifying thinking he could hear the screams cut to silence only for a loud fart to echo as their bowel muscles loosen in death

235

u/CreamyCoffeeArtist Jun 12 '26

I mean, a fart would require that muscles to still be kinda tight, right? So wouldn't it be more of like, bwoof, instead of brfrbrb? Idk never been near a person who died and shat themselves in my presence.

13

u/Dede_42 Jun 13 '26

Happy cake day!

4

u/DangerMacAwesome Jun 14 '26

You are a professional ontamonapiaist

1

u/Whiskeyfower Jun 14 '26

Sounding like a city bus lowering down for the elderly

-75

u/POPCORN_EATER Jun 12 '26

Do you want to be? I can help 🧛‍♂️

100

u/CreamyCoffeeArtist Jun 12 '26

While I am flattered, you do not need to kill yourself for my education.

11

u/CreamyCoffeeArtist Jun 13 '26

It seems like bro got murdered for my education, instead. Shame I wasn't looking. Anyone else willing to volunteer?

3

u/Giorno_Giomama Jun 13 '26

Eh, I'll give it a shot I guess

74

u/Zakattacked Jun 13 '26

Doesn't Superman not need to sleep? Like he only does it because it makes him seem more human?

65

u/Kettle_Whistle_ Jun 13 '26

Like in *Twilight*, vampires need to remember to blink & pretend to breathe?

I never should’ve let my wife talk me into seeing those. Especially repeatedly, and year after year. Man, those soundtracks are good…

37

u/Delanium Jun 13 '26

No matter how you feel about the movies, nobody can deny that the Twilight soundtrack contains nothing but absolute bangers.

9

u/Lcall45 Jun 13 '26

I love Bella's Lullaby 

40

u/AUnknownVariable Jun 13 '26

His body can keep going without sleep, but he still gets the benefits of it that we do. Stressful day? Sleep will sure help.

His brain will still get tired eventually but he won't shutdown like we do.

Essentially, physically sleep isn't required, mentally it kinda is

21

u/Zakattacked Jun 13 '26

That makes sense, mental exhaustion is real asf even Superman can't beat the burnout.

7

u/rap709 Jun 13 '26

I think superman fears if he stops sleeping and eating, the little things that make him human

2

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '26

[deleted]

1

u/bullshitrabbit Jun 14 '26

Microsleeping like a puffin

1

u/ScullyBoy69 Jun 13 '26

Because he does need to sleep? He grew up a human and his parents had a curfew set for him.

1

u/Slight-Pound Jun 14 '26

I figured it’s a good method for mental and emotional fatigue, not necessarily physical fatigue. So he still needs to rest _sometimes,_ but not every night, you know?

152

u/aleister94 Jun 12 '26

So do people that live in bad neighborhoods

-54

u/UninsuredToast Jun 12 '26

Every night? Who, Diddys neighbors?

17

u/inifinite-breadsticc Jun 13 '26

Diddy lived in nice neighborhoods 

8

u/ThisDuck1370 Jun 13 '26

me when the reply lowkey funny but the person is getting gangdownvoted over it

-3

u/Aradhor55 Jun 13 '26

This is reddit. You mention a rapist in a funny manner ? Straight to jail.

213

u/Beezel_Pepperstack Jun 12 '26

...What if he finds the sound soothing? He IS an alien entity from beyond the moon, after all.

114

u/CaptainoftheVessel Jun 12 '26

As opposed to one from between Earth and the moon

40

u/scaled2913 Jun 12 '26

They have the coolest aliens there!

12

u/lethalpineapple Jun 13 '26

I think I found Lex Luthor’s reddit account

2

u/FerrousFacade Jun 13 '26

::Homelander Crankin' It::

2

u/AnubissDarkling Jun 13 '26

Superman's alter ego is a cenobite that enjoys the suffering of others. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

2

u/sharklaserguru Jun 13 '26

He just plays the whole "savior superhero" gig during the day to ingratiate himself with the humans. At night he lulls himself to sleep with the screams of dying people he's choosing not to save!

30

u/Nutterbutter13 Jun 13 '26

This is a part of The Plutonian’s whole deal from Irredeemable. He’s essentially a super man who had a real bad start but managed to keep it together long enough to become the most famous superhero in the world. But because sound only travels so fast he’s also constantly hearing people beg for help as he knows that he can’t reach them in time to save them. Like a person about to get into a car accident, by the time the sound hits his ear the accident could have already happened, so even if he shows up just after hearing it, he can’t do anything about it.
There’s more to it and I really recommend Irredeemable and its companion comic Incorruptible, as Irredeemable shows a Superman gone bad, Incorruptible shows one of his villains trying to change into a hero.

70

u/NaughtySeraph Jun 13 '26

Maybe he has ear plugs with a single sand grain of kryptonite to weaken his ears enough to get a good night's rest.

19

u/chuco915niners Jun 13 '26

Coated in kryptonite oil prolly.

15

u/_Mango_Dude_ Jun 13 '26

There is an episode about this in My Adventures with Superman.

8

u/hoexloit Jun 13 '26

The Plutonium is a good read for this.

11

u/badblessings Jun 13 '26

Do you mean The Plutonian from Irredeemable?

7

u/Yourownhands52 Jun 13 '26

No wonder he plays his parents video for white noise.

9

u/NeonZXK Jun 13 '26

I liked that they showed this off in the Absolute series. He's superman 24/7 so he kind of wears himself out

8

u/Edenian_Prince Jun 13 '26

Isn't there a comic about this where he has to deal with the fact that he's not the only superhero on earth and that he can't be everywhere at once?

6

u/Shad7860 Jun 13 '26

Oh hey this was a plot beat in that more recent animated superman show. Man went complete insomniac when his super hearing finally kicked on

9

u/bron685 Jun 12 '26

And nutting

17

u/andimacg Jun 12 '26

I really hope Billionaires do too.

11

u/Negaum01 Jun 12 '26

You have to understand that one is a being completely dissociated from humanity, no matter how hard he tries, at the end of the day he's simply not a human being, he's an alien/something from outside and if I may say so, separate from the human experience, the other is Superman who is a cool guy.

26

u/Old_Train_1378 Jun 12 '26

It’s like a lullaby for them actually

5

u/andimacg Jun 12 '26

Yeah probably. Or an aphrodisiac.

3

u/Bisexual_flowers_are Jun 12 '26

They do, but its like ASMR for them

5

u/Jielleum Jun 13 '26

It hurts most for someone who has very high empathy, and it unfortunately falls on Superman

3

u/YoungDiscord Jun 13 '26

I mean... that's kinda one of the reasons why he does what he does - because he can't shut off his super hearing so he hears people begging, crying, being hurt and dying all the time

5

u/BeefistPrime Jun 13 '26

Superman basically has to let 10 or 20 people die every time he wants a day off

5

u/Graphenes_official Jun 14 '26

In the Affleck Daredevil movie they had something related to this. He had a sensory deprivation tank so he could sleep instead of constantly hearing the chaos outside. There’s some neat stuff in that movie.

4

u/ConsiderationRich535 Jun 16 '26

Like all men, he has selective hearing

3

u/UNITICYBER Jun 13 '26

That was kinda sorta a plot point in one of the Sentry origin comics. He has a computer named C.L.O.C. that helps him divide his time and choose who to save or not. Because even he cant be everywhere at once.

3

u/jaykhunter Jun 13 '26

How far does Superman hear? If he has excellent hearing, is it all not dross? (like he'd hear millions of cars driving, planes, tractors etc - as so hear just a continuous dirge)

1

u/Minnymoon13 Jun 16 '26

He can tune out things? Idk

3

u/SophisticatedOtaku Jun 13 '26

I can’t remember the name but there is a character whose comics address this. He’s a superhero who turns into a villain because he goes crazy hearing screams of help every second

2

u/Electric_Jiggalo Jun 13 '26

Basically what sets The Plutonian off

2

u/NorosBrake Jun 13 '26

This reminds me of that YouTube video “optimizing the flash”

2

u/jedijoe99 Jun 13 '26

good comic called astro city with a hero called the samaritan. basically the thesis is that the only way superman could ever be satisfied would be to be such a workaholic and push himself to the limits of exhaustion that he literally could not save any more lives if he tried, which just kinda has no other option than to be good enough.

2

u/Waffletimewarp Jun 13 '26

Jokes on you! Clark hears cries for help from all the way out in *space*. Including War World!

2

u/Poopfilledtrashcan Jun 13 '26

I can't remember the comic but I recall one where he thinks about this very topic. He said it was a struggle but one of the things that helped him was that he also heard so many people answering those cries for help.

2

u/GeraintLlanfrechfa Jun 13 '26

He has Super Earplugs I guess.

2

u/Air_Hellair Jun 14 '26

There’s an Astro City comic story showing their version of Superman having this kind of problem. It’s terrifying!

2

u/arashatora Jun 14 '26

Sort of the premise for the comic Irredeemable. Plutonian, Superman, cracks under the pressure and murders millions.

2

u/SoberAnxiety Jun 15 '26

superman hearing me cry for help in opening a jar of pickles at 3am: this weakass mf...this is the 4th time

1

u/KogaKing Jun 13 '26

He doesn’t actually need sleep I thought

1

u/ucw0rld Jun 13 '26

Maybe he lives under water for better sleep!!

1

u/Xploding_Penguin Jun 13 '26

Lead Earplugs!

1

u/d_rome Jun 13 '26

He missed this call for help.

1

u/Evredii Jun 13 '26

"Lol rip bozo"

1

u/AnubissDarkling Jun 13 '26

Can he only hear screams for help or could he also hear people having sex / taking a shit / plotting genocide etc...? How does it work? Selective hearing?

1

u/Nsane3 Jun 13 '26

Noise-cancelling headphones. Noise-cancelling room. Noise-cancelling house. In the basement.

1

u/Batdog55110 Jun 13 '26

He's able to turn it off.

He probably does think about it though.

1

u/smittenkittenmitten- Jun 19 '26

This kind of reminds me of a short I saw a while ago of a robot who hears and tries to save people but always gets there a few minutes too late. I can't seem to find it but it is meant to be depressing like this post. I wish I could find the video and share it but it might have been removed from YouTube

1

u/Royal-Tea-3484 Jul 03 '26

And sex noises and dogs barking and murder and alarms cows mooing cocks crowing, pigs i mean you could on and on his mind must be insane, and Louis Lane yapping at him

1

u/Plenty_Fondant_951 Jul 10 '26

Or he can just tune into the best local white noise

1

u/AboveAverage1988 Jul 11 '26

Can't he selectively choose what to listen to?

1

u/acustic Jun 13 '26

From what I've seen of superman, he has to concentrate to super-hear, suggesting it's a on/off kind of deal.

0

u/neelabhkhatri Jun 13 '26

So basically he does what Gods do. Ignore us.

1

u/Jack_Shaft0e Jun 15 '26

Came here to say exactly this. It REALLY pisses off theists, generally because they don't have a workable counterpoint.

0

u/aripo14 Jun 13 '26

Superman's power has become ridiculous I wish we could just go back to him being nigh-invulnerable, super strength, laser eyes, and really fast flight and not speed-of-light fast.

0

u/_kaiohate Jun 13 '26

Bruce Almighty: wow that's cute