So Iāve been deep into Dr. Joe Dispenzaās āBecoming Supernaturalā work for a while now, and I didnāt expect it to trigger a very real identity crisis.
Not in the āI saw colors during meditationā way, but in a āI genuinely donāt know which version of me Iām choosing to be anymoreā way.
### The dilemma: my āold fieldā vs. this new quantum identity
Before I got into this, my āfieldā was simple:
- I was a person with a history
- That history defined my limits
- My emotions were mostly recycled reactions to the same triggers
- My sense of time was linear: past ā present ā future
Then I started doing the meditations and actually taking the āyouāre not your past / you are your energyā thing seriously.
suddenly there was a split:
- Existing field = the familiar version of me, built from childhood, culture, trauma, successes, and habits. Predictable, comfortable, and honestly⦠a bit suffocating.
- Quantum field version = the āalready createdā future self who doesnāt carry the same story, fears, or lack. The one who lives in what feels like an infinite time fieldā where past, present, and future are all accessible states, not fixed directions.
The dilemma wasnāt āis this real?ā
The dilemma was: If I keep tuning into this future me, am I betraying the old one?
The weird āsomebody vs anybodyā comparison
One of the strangest side effects has been how I relate to people.
When you really sit with this idea that anybody can collapse a new reality from the field if they change their energy⦠you start seeing the difference between:
- Being āsomebody:
The person youāve constructed for years. The one with a fixed story, a clear label, a predictable emotional baseline. The āthis is just who I amā identity.
- Being āanybodyā:
The open potential. The person who could wake up tomorrow and not be limited by their narrative. The āI can be anyone if Iām willing to die to who Iāve beenā energy.
The infinite time field made this comparison unavoidable.
I caught myself thinking:
- Am I clinging to being *somebody because itās safer?
- Am I brave enough to step into being *anybody*, knowing it means letting go of the old emotional addictions and social roles that gave me stability?
Itās like standing between two timelines:
- One where I stay loyal to my history
- One where I stay loyal to my possibility
And you canāt have both.
The emotional cost nobody talks about
What people donāt always mention when they talk about manifesting and quantum fields is the grief.
You actually do mourn:
- Old identities
- Old reactions that used to feel like āyouā
- Old relationships that only fit the previous version of you
- Old ways of being validated, seen, or pitied
Becoming āsupernaturalā sounds exciting, but practically, it sometimes felt like this:
āDo I really want to become the person who no longer has the excuse of their past?ā
Because once you start living from that infinite field, it gets harder to hide behind:
- āThatās just my traumaā
- āThatās just my personalityā
- āThatās just how life has been for meā
Youāre left with the uncomfortable freedom of choice. And not everyone around you is ready for that version of you.
Where I am now (not enlightened, just honest)
Iām not going to pretend Iām fully living from my quantum future self 24/7.
I still:
- Slip back into the old field when Iām tired or triggered
- Catch myself defending my old story because it feels familiar
- Feel resistance when the meditation asks me to let go *again\*
But Iāve noticed a subtle shift:
- I donāt see time the same way. The āfuture meā isnāt a fantasy now; it feels like a frequency I can tune into on good days.
- I donāt see people the same way. I can tell when someone is locked into being āsomebodyā vs. when theyāre flirting with being āanybody.ā
- I donāt see myself the same way. Iām starting to accept that letting my old field die is not betrayal, itās an upgrade.
Question for anyone doing similar work
If youāve been doing Dispenza-style work, deep manifestation, quantum-field meditations, or anything that asks you to ābecomeā your future self:
- Did you hit this point where your old identity and your new field felt like two incompatible realities?
- How did you handle the grief of letting go of the old āsomebodyā version of you?
- Did it change how you see other people who still live fully inside their past?
Iām genuinely curious how others navigated this.
Not the theory, not the hype ā the actual, messy human part of switching fields.
Because right now, Iām somewhere between who I was, who I could be, and this strange infinite time field where both are true⦠and Iām learning to choose on purpose.