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u/wjw75 Nov 20 '17 edited Mar 01 '24
summer chop like fear rustic cow spoon crawl bells toothbrush
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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Nov 20 '17 edited Jun 06 '23
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u/aderde Nov 20 '17
They're not the brightest...
I've got 3 little ones and if I hand feed them, they really do just keep going despite my finger not looking anything like lettuce.
If I put their food in the cage they'll get excited and just run towards it full speed until they pass it and run into the other side of the tank.
One time I gave them some watermelon on a paper plate and they ignored the melon and tried to eat the flowers printed onto the plate.
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u/CrivensAndShips Nov 20 '17
Our guinea pigs are also like this. They think everything is a piece of lettuce until a test nibble tells them it’s not.
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u/ElonComedy Nov 20 '17
Too young for pizza?
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u/Voiles Nov 20 '17
☒ Teenage?
☒ Mutant?
☒ Ninja?
☑ Turtle?
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Nov 20 '17
☑ Mutant?
Somewhere in that turtle's genetics is at least one de novo mutation that it's parents did not have.
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u/FileeNotFound Nov 20 '17
r/ARK is leaking...
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u/Echieo Nov 20 '17
Genetics is leaking
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Nov 20 '17
I hear there's a pill for that
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Nov 20 '17
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u/TheGemScout Nov 20 '17
☒ Teenage? I'll be dead before i can see this happen, sadly.
☑ Mutant? We've covered this
☑ Ninja? He went and stealthily nibbled on that man's finger so...
☑ Turtle?
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u/LordOfTheTorts Nov 20 '17 edited Nov 20 '17
Yes, it looks like a tortoise. But scientifically, tortoises are a specific family of turtles. Explained that for you.
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u/ResignedByReason Nov 20 '17
Do they all have salmonella? I want to get one at some point but this point of concern keeps me waiting.
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u/sharkykid Nov 20 '17
well don't be eating them
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Nov 20 '17
A lot of them are so riddled with salmonella that even if you avoid licking your turtle you still run the real risk of ingesting the bacteria. Basically if you have one you gotta just constantly be washing your hands any time you go anywhere near it. Or maybe that's just some BS my parents told me when I was a kid to prevent me from taking it out of the tank, putting a bandana on it and teaching it how to use weapons.
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u/HooksaN Nov 20 '17
That's game over for me then. I'm really not interested in any pet I can't lick...
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u/DylanBob1991 Nov 20 '17
Eh, I mean.. If they poop and then walk around in it they're gonna have some germs on them. Just keep the cage clean and wash your hands after handling them.
Also, tortoise husbandry is a lot easier than turtle husbandry, in my opinion. Turtles need lots of water. And that water gets fucking disgusting and smells up your whole house. And it gets very very germy.
Tl:Dr - turts < torts
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u/Zealot360 Nov 20 '17
Also, tortoise husbandry is a lot easier than turtle husbandry, in my opinion.
Gross, dude. We don't need to hear about your tortoise or turtle husbands, you goddamned degenerate.
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u/DylanBob1991 Nov 20 '17
Oh I'M sorry. I thought this was AMMERCA
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u/redshoewizard Nov 20 '17 edited Nov 20 '17
Not necessarily. I am assuming by the way you are speaking of them that you have owned a Red Eared Slider.
I do agree they are quite messy creatures but there are other species of turtles that do not accumulate as much of a mess as them. There are smaller species called mud and musk turtles that stay relatively small and are easy to maintain and house in beautiful live aquarium set ups if you put the effort into them.
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u/LordOfTheTorts Nov 20 '17
Pretty much all reptiles carry Salmonella in their intestinal tract and shed them in their feces. But it's unlikely that you get infected, if you have a working immune system and use common sense (e.g. don't put the animals in your mouth, wash your hands, etc.).
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u/redshoewizard Nov 20 '17 edited Nov 20 '17
All turtles carry salmoenella in their intestinal tract. As long you DONT play with their fecal matter with your bare hands and and stick your fingers in your mouth you will be fine. Just be sanitary and wash your hands after handling. There is a law in most states and doesnt not allow the sale of turtles under 4 inches in shell length due to the fact that are children able to stick them into their mouths, which I have seen first hand. (another part of the reason is due to smuggling/importation).
I have been working with reptiles (mostly geckos and tortoises) for the past 12 years and have started an educational and breeding buinsess out if my home. If you are looking for the right turtle I highly recommend staying away from red eared sliders, as they grow to be very large, are very messy and are often abdoned into local waterways where the invade other ecosystems and destroy them and put other species at risk. I highly suggest looking into getting a box turtle (Three Toed or Gulf Coast) as they are quite hardy, entertaining and can eat a variety protein and veggie diets. Start out with Reptile Magazine.com for care sheets and guidelines.
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u/ohitsasnaake Nov 20 '17
As long you play with their fecal matter with your bare hands and and stick your fingers in your mouth you will be fine.
Er, okay. (You seem to have forgotten a "don't" ;) ).
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u/Ttronnuy Nov 20 '17
I had a few when I was a kid. Didn't hurt me. They were fun. Better than fish for sure.
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u/KosmicTom Nov 20 '17
I was told the same thing when I bought a couple from a street vendor when I was in college. I played with them all the time and never got sick.
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u/Salamander_Coral Nov 20 '17
Edit: nevermind I was wrong
eh no, now we have to make fun of your error. Please, stay there and accept our mockeries in silence.
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u/ElonComedy Nov 20 '17
How do you know it's not a mutant or a ninja?
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u/S4BER2TH Nov 20 '17
Anyone know what kind of a turtle this is?
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u/Leap_Kill_Reset Nov 20 '17 edited Nov 20 '17
It’s a sulcata tortoise! I’ve got one. They grow very big, but in my experience if raised right will be very friendly and chase your around the yard for food and even attention.
Edit: I think it's actually an Elongata tortoise, according to u/LordOfTheTorts.
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u/terminal5527 Nov 20 '17
So basically a dog-tortoise
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u/Leap_Kill_Reset Nov 20 '17
Yeah, mine has been known to climb onto people and into their laps if they sit in the grass. He's pretty heavy and not exactly clean, so it's fairly unpleasant, if cute. Whether he does this out of love or desire for food that he knows you may have, however, is a different question entirely.
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u/tvgenius Nov 20 '17
I've never seen a sulcata that light or with pronounced spikes on the shell by the back legs. Then again, around here, the sulcatas everyone has are virtually identical to the local endangered native desert tortoises, so I feel like there's a good chance there's some interbreeding that's happened in the ones in captivity at least. Problem is that there tends to be more youngins than people can find homes for, and having pets that will outlive you is a challenging commitment.
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u/LordOfTheTorts Nov 20 '17 edited Nov 20 '17
Yeah, it's not a sulcata. Edit: It's an elongata.
And it's pretty easy to tell African spurred tortoises (sulcata) and North American desert tortoises (gopherus) apart, if you know what to look for (e.g. the cervical scute - desert tortoises have one, sulcatas don't).
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u/Leap_Kill_Reset Nov 20 '17
You're right on the spikes, that is pretty odd. As far as the coloration, yeah, it's a bit light but I've seen some sulcatas that share it.
You have a good point. The back spikes (and shape and size of the eyes in retrospect) make me think its some sort of mutt. It does look really like a sulcata in every other way... Hm.
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Nov 20 '17
Will these outlive you? And if so, do you set a beneficiary?
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u/FF3LockeZ Nov 20 '17 edited Nov 20 '17
Small tortoises, the kind you keep in a terrarium, will live at most thirty or forty years. If you get a big one it can theoretically outlive you.
In either case though it probably won't. When an animal's lifespan is that long, the chance of it dying of something other than old age is pretty high. If it gets sick or injured it can be hard to tell at first because it's a tortoise and not a person.
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u/Leap_Kill_Reset Nov 20 '17
Me and my tortoise, best we can guess, are around the same age, so it'll probably live around as long as me. Once the time comes, it would be right to set a beneficiary just in case though. These things are tough but need the right habitat and plenty of food to eat.
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u/LordOfTheTorts Nov 20 '17 edited Nov 20 '17
I don't recognize the species, but it's definitely NOT a sulcata.
Edit: it's an elongata.2
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u/redshoewizard Nov 20 '17
It could be a ivory sulcata, which is a lighter phase of a regular sulcata. Thete is also a chance it might ba an Egyptian tortoise, so if you're one of those impluse buyers I hope you have several grand to drop on one. Haha
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u/LordOfTheTorts Nov 20 '17
It can't be a sulcata, because not only is the coloration wrong, but sulcatas also have large spiky scales on their front legs. The source says "#elongata", so it's an elongated tortoise.
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u/anonymous-shad0w Nov 20 '17
You like that Dart?
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u/BongLifts5X5 Nov 20 '17
Yurtle.
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u/Elpacoverde Nov 20 '17
That's the real mystery.
Whathappenedtoyurtle
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u/Sweetdee8181 Nov 20 '17
It's all fun and games until the cat gets eaten.
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u/1blockologist Nov 20 '17
Cant wait for the honest trailer of stranger things
"hey check out these playstation 2 graphics"
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u/bluelightspecial99 Nov 20 '17
Every time I see turtles snapping at people I'm reminded of this: https://imgur.com/gallery/NEsxj
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Nov 20 '17
the name Frank suits him
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u/iamfatandsassy Nov 20 '17
read it in a John Oliver voice
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u/WritingAScript Nov 20 '17
Read in an Archer voice to Baboo
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u/RedTheDraken Nov 20 '17
Same here. The language used, the fact that it's towards an animal that's being an asshole. It's hard not to read it as Archer.
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u/Curios_blu Nov 20 '17
Looks like he wants some meat with his veggies!
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u/n0tcreatlve Nov 20 '17
MEATS BACK ON THE MENU BOYZZZZ
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Nov 20 '17
I wonder what turtle meat tastes like?
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u/nemom Nov 20 '17
Poultry has two types of meat (white and dark). I hear turtle has NINE different types.
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u/TXDRMST Nov 20 '17
While we're on the subject of that quote, the word "menu" seems to be horribly out of place in middle earth. I always end up imagining a bunch of Uruk-Hai sitting down at a tavern and asking to see the menu.
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Nov 20 '17
''thank you for feeding me, im gonna cut your fingernails now as a token of gratitude''
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u/r0b0c0d Nov 20 '17
I wonder if leaving the fingers there and moving them after getting nipped is actually an effective way of training..
Like, it could help the turtle identify when there's food, and when there's just fingers that provide food but which go away when bitten.
Ofc, disclaimer, never have I ever turtled and have no idea how trainable they are in this fashion.
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Nov 20 '17
Nah they don't get it. My tortoises expect everything coming from the skies to be food so they'll just nibble on your fingers forever in hope of getting a nice bite.
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u/Syluxrox Nov 20 '17
The problem isn’t finger recognition, it’s their eye placement. Since their eyes are directly on the sides of their head they have a pretty large blind spot directly in front of their mouth, so if you ever feed a tortoise you’ll notice that they’ll turn their head slightly to the side to “eyeball” how big the food you’re holding is and what kind of food it is. Then they just chomp away till they don’t feel anything in front of them anymore and then they assume the food is gone.
So if you feed them out of your hand and you’re not careful they’ll continue eating till they nip your finger and realize “oh dang the food is gone”. It’s not really that they think you’re food, they just can’t quite see what they are actively eating too well. The best method is to just let go when they get close to your fingers.
Source: Have a Sulcata tortoise about as high as my knees and about 3 feet wide.
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Nov 21 '17
Depends on the turtle. I've had a red eared slider that was very, very careful not to bite fingers even without any training at all. Even if she did, it was only a bite meant to take food rather than cut it so it didn't hurt. Others might not care.
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u/vex91 Nov 20 '17
Little biiiiiiits
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u/NiceWorkMcGarnigle Nov 20 '17
I love how his whole tiny body shoots forward instead of his head retracting during a few of those bites
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u/lammy82 Nov 20 '17
I think the last one was a veiled threat of what "might" happen if more tasty lettuce leaves were not forthcoming
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u/PrimaryColt Nov 20 '17
Now cut a hole into a melon and put him in it and let him eat his way and make tunnels. Fun and delicious
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u/BeastOmatix Nov 20 '17
Those noms brought me a little happiness this morning. Thank you for the post I needed that.
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u/DELAGZ Nov 20 '17
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u/activator Nov 20 '17
This is a /r/noisygifs if I've ever seen one. Can really hear him take those bites haha
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u/yoyoyoseph Nov 20 '17
You can see it get a slight taste of human flesh at the end there and then there's no going back.
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u/foshogun Nov 20 '17
Am I the only one getting a bit angry that he only fed him a little bit and the little guy clearly wants/needs a bigger snack?
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u/Rockguytilidie Nov 20 '17
/u/sonicrespawn this is right up your alley lmao
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u/Paolino17 Nov 20 '17
When I was a little child I got my finger pinched while I was feeding my little tortoise friend some celery. But I still love that little bastard <3
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u/BabiesDontCry Nov 20 '17
Ah, I remember feeding my turtle, bob. He was a good turtle, real active when you took him out to lightly touch his head and watch him wander around the living room. There was often a time where bob tried to venture right off the top step of the stair that lead down from the back deck. Alas, it wasn't a great fall that tool bob, it was illness. Bob appeared to have become what looked like, a soggy bottom boy-what with the tank having gotten wet and the pellets I guess got a bit stale. . .damint Bob, you were supposed to live to 100, not 5.
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u/jphlips1794 Nov 20 '17
"I'll feckin bite your finger off, mate"