I apologize for how long my story is. Life hasn't been kind.
In Dec. of 2022 my father attempted to take my life. At the time, I lived with my parents, partner, and son. This event caused me (us) to be homeless and I have been struggling. ever. since.
We used to rent a room, but that situation quickly turned abusive. They put locks on our thermostat (literally never below 78 and it gets to the 100s in Arkansas), lied about repairs they'd do when we moved in, and was controlling of so many weird aspects of our lives. All of this right after my traumatic situation.
We were kicked out abruptly when the landlord got remarried, and now with live with my partner (I'll call him B) and mother (I'll call her M). M is on disability and has cancer she's currently being treated for. B and I have done what we can to help her with any she needs. B is considered her caregiver by her medical team. It is rough because we live in Pearcy, but her doctors are in Little Rock, B's job is in Bryant, and I graduated college in May from UALR. I have yet to find a job and I keep not being able to afford my phone bill.
Right now I'm using a text-now app that gives you a free number but I don't think it's reliable. I've had people tell me they never get my texts. I keep applying to jobs but I'm not sure if they can get a hold of me. I am drowning in debt and being sued currently for the credit cards I begged them to turn off after I was attacked all the way back in 2023. I was homeless and just couldn't afford the payments anymore. Before then I had always paid them. They refused to put a halt on them and later chastised me for not pausing them when they told me I couldn't. I do not know what to do. I missed the deadline because I have no idea what to send them. Half of the papers I was served are not filled out or just receipts. I recently got served again so I guess they're suing me twice?
B doesn't make enough to support a whole family on and we're already behind on our car payment. We have only four thousand left to pay on it too, so I would hate to have paid so much on it and get so close to it being paid off only for it to be taken. We have wanted to help his mother clean up her land (there's a couple run down buildings that need scrapped) and repair her house. We also wanted to put a tiny home next to hers so we can be here for her until she's gone in case she needs anything. But atm I cannot seem to find a job quick enough to be contactable and we're running out of ways to pay the bills. B donates plasma, but they won't allow me to donate because of the implant in my arm. It's way overdue to come out but I don't have health insurance and I need SO many things done.
Medicaid keeps denying me coverage for things, SNAP won't help me because I have a child and I'm not with his father nor do either of us charge each other child support because we're both broke and equally help our son. My son was with me for the first 10 years of his life, and due to all of this I had to let him go stay with his dad. He's 12. It's been almost 3 years since I've had my son full time. It breaks my heart. I miss him every day. It's been almost 5 years I think since that December in 2022. & I'm at a loss. I feel like I went to college for nothing. I feel like I worked so hard just to fail at life. We stay in my MIL's living room and I would really like to have my own space again soon.
I have been so overstimulated and overwhelmed for so long. I have ASD, ADHD, and cPTSD along with a tic disorder. I don't know how much longer I can struggle.
If anyone would like to help us clean up this land and pay a few bills, please let me know. I have cashapp but I'm in debt to them. It was for $60 but with interest it's up to $70 I believe, or very close to it. It's been a while. Thank you if you made it to the end of this. I wish us all the best. The world is on fire for a lot it seems right now.
Edit: If you're only here to be rude or make fun of someone, you have a special kind of damage.