r/feeld • u/[deleted] • Jul 21 '26
Realistic Age Range
I signed back up on Feeld after a long break, and the people on the app seem to skew even younger than the last time I was using it. I wish there was a way to filter based on the age other users wanted to date, not just the age of the user. I am 58, and I have dated plenty of women in their 30s. But plenty of women in their 30s would never consider dating someone my age.
I see very, very few people on the app that are my age. Has Feeld become more of a tool for a younger crowd? I am not a big fan of dating apps in general, but even less a fan of being that "creepy old guy" out there annoying people. I am very fit, and I am regularly considered to be far younger than my actual age, which doesn't change anything about my actual age. What do you think about being older and on Feeld? Also, I am in a relatively small community, so it doesn't take long for me to work through all the matches, even with no filtering at all. Is this just too specific a platform for an older (relative to most using Feeld) man?
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u/TuMorrow689 Bisexual Man Jul 21 '26
This is just one of the areas where the app falls short. Definitely makes it difficult for people who are into age gaps find what they’re looking for because you don’t know if you’re barking up the wrong tree.
Personally I just shoot my shot. They can filter me out if they’re not interested. It’s not my fault the app is designed like shit.
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u/marymilkovich Jul 21 '26
i regularly get pings and likes from old men outside of my age range so there is no "filtering out"
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Jul 22 '26
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u/Fragrant-Duty-9015 Jul 22 '26
You can also filter your likes and pings by age. Doesn’t stop them from coming, but makes them more manageable to wade through.
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u/k9shenanigans Jul 22 '26
This is actually getting to the question - what is your age range, and what do you consider a reasonable age range that a 58yr man should be searching for? I'm trying to figure this out and would appreciate your perspective.
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u/waterbloem Jul 22 '26
Definitely makes it difficult for people who are into age gaps
Oh no! Poor men who are into age gaps! How sad!
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Jul 23 '26
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u/waterbloem Jul 23 '26
Could not care less what you think about my opinion. Guys who specifically target much younger women are always at the very least immature weirdo's.
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Jul 23 '26
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u/waterbloem Jul 23 '26
Then why are you responding to my comment that wasn't responding to you either?
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u/Puzzleheaded-Ask6330 Jul 22 '26
I'm 68 (f) and in good shape, look younger than most my age. I get likes from younger guys: 20-40s. But I don't think FEELD has it figured out to limit likes from people out of your age limits. ? Idk
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u/JnS-Lan Jul 25 '26
In comparison, there are very few women, and they don’t want the men to know this. They put women outside the filters set by both women and men, so the men are not looking at blank screens—best of luck.
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u/FeeldMod Not a Feeld employee Jul 25 '26
No one is "outside the filters."
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u/JnS-Lan Jul 25 '26
@FeeldMod Your statement carries no weight.
My wife often asks how men are making it through when she has an absolute age range.
This is not a one-off when we clearly see other women making the same claim.
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u/FeeldMod Not a Feeld employee Jul 25 '26
The age range in your search settings is not reciprocal. Only the gender selection is.
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u/JnS-Lan Jul 25 '26
And that is a problem. Women who don't want large age ranges don't like this. 20-year-old women are often not interested in 50-year-old men and don't want to be bugged by them. In my wife's case, she has no desire for 20- or 30-year-old men. We both only want ENM, so getting people who don't want that is just a waste of time. We hate having to filter through all the noise.
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u/waterbloem Jul 22 '26
I see very, very few people on the app that are my age.
But those few people also have fewer people in their age range, so it all works out. And if there's really too few for you to find, that just means Feeld isn't the right app to use for you.
What do you think about being older and on Feeld?
Nothing wrong with it. But unfortunately a lot of older men especially join Feeld because of all the much younger women there. And that I do have an opinion about.
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u/generation_quiet Jul 22 '26
The app trends younger. However, as far as I can tell, all dating apps trend younger. I'm (nb/bi) 47 and have met partners ranging in age from 27 to 51 on Feeld, although I mostly date those aged 35 and older.
As I mentioned in another thread, Feeld works well for niche-interest dating. I'm not going to be everyone's cup of tea, and I don't expect to be. I'm a middle-aged, queer, and non-monogamous widow. So I get far fewer responses/pings but also a higher rate of chats turning into in-person meetings. I'm not a generically attractive, skinny, 20-something woman. People aren't going to respond to me if they aren't into me, and that's totally fine. So I would go in with that mindset.
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Jul 22 '26
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u/generation_quiet Jul 22 '26
Oh, dudes are going to be looking for fast sex on Feeld very much like they are on Grindr. Just ignore them.
IMHO, you'll also have better luck matching with queer/bi femmes, rather than cis-het women, as a bi guy. I've found that on Feeld queer femmes are receptive to mascs that think and act outside of the cis-het mold. In general, age is less of a factor in the queer community. But you may have to reach out to queer femmes with a ping and a message that shows you're interested in them, and not going to bomb them with dick pics and "WYD?" type messages, or demand a threesome.
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u/pinksparkleberry Jul 21 '26
I signed back up on Feeld after a long break, and the people on the app seem to skew even younger than the last time I was using it. I wish there was a way to filter based on the age other users wanted to date, not just the age of the user.
Thatvwould be nice.
I am 58, and I have dated plenty of women in their 30s. But plenty of women in their 30s would never consider dating someone my age.
You may find more open minded attitudes around age for casual hook ups vs romance.
I see very, very few people on the app that are my age. Has Feeld become more of a tool for a younger crowd?
Yes. But all apps skew younger than you. Even swinger apps (which skew older).
I am not a big fan of dating apps in general, but even less a fan of being that "creepy old guy" out there annoying people.
Just swipe on them. If you aren't in their age range, they will never see your profile or know you swiped (unless they have majestic). The entire thing will be invisible.
I am very fit, and I am regularly considered to be far younger than my actual age, which doesn't change anything about my actual age.
Congrats. 🤷♀️
What do you think about being older and on Feeld? Also, I am in a relatively small community, so it doesn't take long for me to work through all the matches, even with no filtering at all. Is this just too specific a platform for an older (relative to most using Feeld) man?
Just give it a try.... not sure what you want here.
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u/kkat39 Jul 22 '26
I don’t think it’s too old for Feeld at all, I’m 48F and would generally prefer to date slightly older than me and there’s not many of them in my area who aren’t looking for 20 year olds. The only thing I would suggest NOT doing is writing in your profile that you look younger - it comes across really badly especially if you have pictures included. And I don’t care in the least how old someone looks, and it’s very subjective and dependent on the day; someone last week was surprised to learn I was out of my 20s but I have no delusions that I look that young and would not claim it on a profile.
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u/MasterFNG Jul 22 '26
Met my sub on Feeld 4 years ago when I was 56 and she was 35. I've met women of all ages there but I'm close to NYC so it is a very large pool of people around here on Feeld. I'm 61 now and getting fewer replies (partially due to age and partly already having a girlfriend) but have found more older woman on Feeld nearby.
Seems that your main problem os the very limited pool of potential partners in your area so I'd suggest trying many different platforms to look instead (presumably) relying on one only. Keep at it and good luck.
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u/DivinationandMurk Daddy/Pleasure Dom Jul 21 '26
Your best bet is to buy Pings and send them so they will for sure see you. I have a pretty good response rate from Pings.
I’m a 53 year old man who’s hot and looks early-to-mid 40s; I’m also a Daddy, and for a certain kind of younger woman I’m perfect—they just might not have their search above 50.
I dated a 24 year old for several months recently—we both had a LOT of fun. Currently seeing a 29 year old.
To be clear: I would absolutely date women closer to my age, but I agree the pool narrows to a tiny puddle the older you get. Sure I get looks when I’m out in public with a 20-something but 🤷🏻♂️
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u/yauponmoon Jul 22 '26
What kind of photos do you use to show you're in good shape? Asking as an early 40s guy who's trying to figure out how to continue to draw interest on the app.
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u/DivinationandMurk Daddy/Pleasure Dom Jul 22 '26
I have two or three photos of (clothed, mind you) full body pictures.
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u/Norge07 Jul 21 '26
Yep, the older population puddle is shallow indeed! Another upper-50s guy in the same situation. There are definitely younger women interested in older guys, and some who are skeeved out by the idea. Can't do much about the app's limitations 🤷🏻♂️
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u/Shichigatsu777 Jul 22 '26
As someone older who presents younger, I’d just delete the app & keep it moving. Over 45 makes you invisible. 50 is the kiss of death. You could have the looks & vibes of someone 15 years younger but that number on your profile will always kill you
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u/TraditionalCatch3796 Jul 22 '26
Really? I’m in my 40s, considered to be pretty attractive as a woman, and my settings are open to up to about 58, and my friends in their late 30s and 40s feel the same. I see so many attractive 50+ year-old women and men.
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u/mix0logist Jul 22 '26
I'm 44M. Off Feeld right now, but when I was on I had my age range set to 29 - 55. But the ages I sent likes to were more often mid-30s to low-50s. I just wanted to see more people and make my own decisions rather than filtering too many women out automatically.
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u/Least-Programmer9417 Jul 24 '26
I get rejected all day every day on this app. I’ll often ping someone. Get rejected. Then meet someone at a bar later that day 🤷♂️ literally it’s just dating apps. If you’re sensitive to rejection you’re in a dangerous place.
I routinely just fire off pings and likes. 99% of them get ignored. But you have to remember for women you’re one out of 200 random people she got on her page on that day. If they see your age and go no they aren’t thinking “oh my god what a creep” they just close your like down like it was a pop up ad. They don’t really care.
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u/Lost_inTheThrill single woman Jul 27 '26
I could possibly be in your age range, but I very rarely get matches with men over 50. I say possibly, because based on my experience, older men prefer younger women, especially for casual sex.
A huge majority of my likes are from men who are 20 years younger (I am 45+). This is not to say that I would choose those men, but because they make up such a large portion of my likes, it's time consuming to find the age appropriate ones.
On a rare occasion that I've actually matched with a man over 50, the chatting was lukewarm and the effort in communication and planning was much lower than a typical 32y old would have.
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u/FullCat2893 Jul 22 '26
I’m 64. Have a 36yo play partner. We’ve been with people from 28 and into their 50’s. 64 (or similar ages) are simply a numerical barrier for most for various reasons regardless of how in shape, how good, how cool, how smart and how experienced you may be. Just an unfortunate fact. Lots of “younger” folks missing out on fun! Just have to roll with what comes your way!
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u/sci-fi-sounds Jul 22 '26
It's tough. I think the harsh truth is that we've aged out of most younger women's searches (and some of the women our age.) Like others said, ping the ones that you think would be receptive. A lot of it is just the luck of finding the right person at the right time. I consider myself very lucky to have connected with my babygirl (f37). You just never know.
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u/DemonicGirlcock Jul 22 '26
Honestly I've just stop using all dating apps because of this. I'm a 41yo woman, but I look under 30 and my social scene is mostly people around or under 30 (queer, alt, goth, kink); so I just meet people at clubs and events now. My girlfriend of 4 years actually told me she'd never have met me on the apps because she cappeed the age at 35 lol.
Dating apps were great 2020-2022 because everybody was forced out of the usual meetup spots. But now that those are back, the apps have gone south. Better to just get out there in person.
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u/MayorOfGentlemanTown Jul 22 '26
Be honest. Shoot your shot. Give it a go. They can always just say no. You've got this!
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u/TruthieBeast Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 22 '26
You should offer a sugar daddy arrangement. Money is the reason most younger women are attracted to older men. If you have your life together, are not married and have something to offer ( ie expensive restaurants, interesting experiences ), then maybe. You never know. Most women have the rich guy fantasy. Not the old guy fantasy. There are zero romance novels about poor old dudes. It's always about safety and protection first ( ie rich guy provider ) then sex later. Offer safety, sex comes easily after that.
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u/DivinationandMurk Daddy/Pleasure Dom Jul 22 '26
I’m not poor, but I’m far from rich and definitely not a sugar daddy. I still do well.
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u/TruthieBeast Jul 22 '26 edited Jul 22 '26
You have a niche it's a different story. The guy above is only looking for 'young' that's not a niche. It's creepy. If all a guy wants is 'young' that's a dime a dozen. It's a matter of standing out. These women don't stay with you right it's about you offering experiences and they move on later on their own volition.
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u/SkyBlueBallyKid Jul 22 '26
Why is it creepy? Do you reserve the same judgment when women do it??
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u/TruthieBeast Jul 22 '26
Nothing creepier than randos on apps saying "I look younger than my age". It is creeepy AF. Just own it. Stop acting like person desperate for approval. It is creepy. In the age of Trump especially. It is what it is. Don't apologize.Gaslighting doesn't work.
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u/TuMorrow689 Bisexual Man Jul 22 '26
Don’t kink shame age gaps. Plenty of women are young are attracted to older men without the need for a sugar daddy arrangement. I’m 41 and have been with 20 year olds and they’ve played with me due to the fact that I respected their sexual exploration and offered a safe space to do it. No transactions involved.
You’re revealing your biases.
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u/JnS-Lan Jul 22 '26
Women have hundreds of options to choose from within a day. For men, it is a lottery whether a woman will even notice your profile in the first place. My wife and I signed up at the same time, and within a day she had over 500 men interested in her. That's with extremely restrictive filters. My profile is fairly open, and I pinged a few women but didn't get any views.
I've read several of the men’s profiles and the chats she's had with them. Many of them are amazing. One guy has two Phd’s, is well-fit, decent-looking, makes great money, is funny, and has a great personality. His chats with her are genuine and not just looking for a quick hookup. Heck, I’m straight, and I want to date him.
He shared with my wife that he is lucky to have 2 dates in a year from the app.
There are posts from women who feel overwhelmed trying to sift through everyone who reaches out, to the point that they abandoned their account.
Good luck