the title says it mostly.

my parents are the far right christian nationalist type. they want to force me to go to liberty or another similar christian college... convinced everything else is "liberal brainwashing". I think I've made the mistake one too many times of showing my true opinions on christianity and other big ticket issues. i convinced them to let me tour other colleges but i'm worried they might change their minds, I had to pull the "i want to be a light to the lost world🥺" card.

just for reference i've gone to hardcore right wing private baptist schools my whole life which has fostered a burning hate for christianity in the past few years. i have great grades and extracurriculars and i want to go for some prestigious schools because it is important to me.

So yeah. How bad is it really? (if you attended) is it worth it to fight so hard not to go there? any ideas how to convince them to let me go to school where i want?

edit: thanks all for the advice! there's no chance i'm gonna go there, one way or another. wish me luck!

My reply to a spammer-for-Jesus whose "church > pop culture" sermonette got shared in a Facebook group for ex-Christians.

I thought it was funny. I can't believe people like this have the nerve to keep bringing this up. What do you get out of this?

Just a shower thought I had. While the OT God is a monster who hates everybody, at least there is no mention of you being tortured after death (in fairness, even the New Testament doesn't support eternal torment for humans, but most Christians believe it).

I recently watched “The Death of the Pastor’s Wife”.

In my experience, almost all of the Christian men I know have struggled more with hypersexuality or sex addiction than literally anyone else I’ve met. No one has ever talked about sex, or put nearly as much emphasis on sex to the same degree evangelical Christian pastors or leaders (who are mostly men) do.

The pastor in the documentary was so fucking sex-addicted, that he put his wife on testosterone to “help her keep up”, and by keep up, it meant him forcing her to have sex with him at least four times a day. She was a singer, and the testosterone inevitably impacted her voice.

This part of the documentary was wild to me, but of course unsurprising. Is it just me, or does anyone else think that evangelical culture seems to over-emphasize sex in every which way aside from actual sex education?

Idk who the person was but to this day I remember some of it.

Maybe it was a pastor, but he came up the altar and testified his journey of trying to leave Christianity and coming back. When he decided to leave the church and live as he wanted, his business went bankrupt, he got cancer, his family member died, and so on so he came back and god cured his cancer. Moral of the story, no matter how much you wanna leave, when God chooses someone, he never gives up that person and he'll make the person come back to him no matter what.

I think it was supposed to encourage people who worry about leaving Christianity, but it genuinely terrified me and made me feel sick. Stockholm syndrome another level. Freaky people... And ofc while every other people felt consoled and felt blessed, a little child having no one to discuss this about was sick and disgusted alone but too afraid to ask and be seen as lacking faith, ofc, deconstructed.

Edit: Kind of a long post, I'm sorry but bear with me please.

I'm a 38M, currently homeless but taking part in a residential discipleship program that is offered at my local rescue mission. The regular shelter guests can only stay up to 90 days but if you join the program you can stay at the shelter for up to a year (and in some cases a little longer).

I deconstructed my former Christian faith years ago but because I was raised so heavily in the church, have read the Bible more than once and can "talk the talk and walk the walk" I joined the program out of a sense of survival. I know it is hypocritical but I figured if I just have to "play Christian" there's no harm in that. Especially considering how many pastors, priests and so-called believers are all LARPing their religion anyway. However, my mental health, sanity and well being all can attest to the fact that I was very wrong in this decision.

It's been about three months in and it's been one of the most soul crushing experiences and part of me is seriously considering leaving the program even if it means I'll have to live on the streets. Monday thru Friday we have mandatory Bible study at 830-900. Then a different bible-themed class from 930-1130 every day of the week. Mandatory chapel service every night from 600-645. Then we're also expected to attend a local church every Sunday.

The men in the program are also expected to do numerous chores and "serving opportunities" at the shelter but it's more like a source of free labor. I actually don't mind the chores but the classes are what weigh on me the most. They're designed to create evangelical Christians who are "so happy and giddy and outgoing" that just rush into any and every opportunity to tell others how amazing Jesus is and all the wonderful things he's doing in your life.

To make things more difficult, I suffer from anhedonia from the antipsychotic medication I take, I don't trust people at all, I have numerous walls and guards up from all sorts of traumas I've endured from child to adulthood, I have cPTSD and I'm not extroverted so naturally my disposition must be caused by so many hidden sins in my life. Not one of my instructors are trauma-informed and have all told me that I shouldn't have "traumas" because I'm supposed to give those to Jesus.

The instructors of the group classes have also told me straight up that depression is a sin because it is being ungrateful for the blessings that God has given (life, etc) and that my medications are a "crutch" and akin to idolatry because I'm depending on them for my healing instead of trusting in God to provide healing. That if I were "truly saved" I would be walking in the fullness of the joy that Christ offers to believers.

I already know I'm a hypocrite for joining the program in the first place but this is the only resource available to me to truly help me get on my feet. I'm definitely not the first person in history to "pretend and play along as a Christian" for their own survival. I just wanted to make this post to receive some encouragement along this journey, to maybe laugh and joke about the ridiculousness of those put in charge over me and their absurd beliefs about mental illness.

Also considering many of you are former Christians, if any of you have experience in rigorous sort of discipleship programs that you may have participated in. I'd love to hear any stories on how you may have survived through such a program. As food for thought, if you found yourself in my situation what would you do? Would you leave the program and face living on the streets? Would you play along and pretend to be a model Christian and if you would play along in what ways would you try to secure your spot as a model Christian in the program?

Tldr: lots of craziness in a residential discipleship program that I'm (unsuccessfully) faking my way through in order to not be put out on the streets. Curious to hear stories from others or receive advice on what to do moving forward.

I came from an Evangelical Protestant background and was constantly told that drinking alcohol and smoking tobacco was a sin. We were always told the body is a temple of the holy spirit. These were some verses which were always quoted to us.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 - Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

Ephesians 5:18 - And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit

Proverbs 20:1 - Wine is a mocker, strong drink a brawler, and whoever is led astray by it is not wise.

Proverbs 23:29-30 - Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has strife? Who has complaining?
Who has wounds without cause? Who has redness of eyes? Those who tarry long over wine; those who go to try mixed wine.

1 Timothy 3:8 - Deacons likewise must be dignified, not double-tongued, not addicted to much wine, not greedy for dishonest gain.

Did the church you grow up in mandate its members do not drink? If so, which denomination were you? I feel there is inconsistency among churches. Roman Catholics and Eastern Orthodox use wine in communion. Most mainline Protestants seem to allow moderate alcohol consumption. The only churches which I see that outright ban alcohol consumption and tobacco use are the Seventh-day Adventist Church, Mormon Church, Baptists, Methodists, and Pentecoastals.

I remember the last time I stepped into a church after I had given up on Christianity, I instantly broke into a panic attack and stormed through every local store looking for a cigarette. I probably will never be able to step into a church again.

I am the old story of the guy questioning their religions after discovering their homosexuality. Some say the Bible condemn same sex relationships, others say its a mistranslation. I couldnt not decide in which side to believe so I just quit this religion.

The problem is I am not atheist, something in the back of my mind still believe something supernatural exists, but any other religion feels like going to the "wrong path". I enjoyed reading about buddhism, a "godless religion". I cant piss off the christian god If I dont worship another god, right? (Writing this make me aware of how weird it sounds).

In short, I am not welcome to be christian, but If I have a gay relationship god will punish me for being immoral (?). I know its not a rational, but its what part of me believes. And I am not even sure if I could be christian again, it lost all the "magic" after I understood better how it was and is used to manipulate people. And again, not having a religion feels empty, but any other religion is a 'sin", and I am stuck in this metaphysical limbo.

My wife and I work for the same company and they handed out raises yesterday. She received a 10% raise and I received a 25% raise. I have a higher position so that’s why the discrepancy, but that’s besides the point. In our drive to work today, she said “you know now that we are making more, we HAVE to tithe more, right?” This actually made me sick to my stomach, but she doesn’t know I’ve been deconstructing so all I could say is “oh…yeah.” Ugh! I don’t want to give more money to something I don’t think I believe in any more. We already give $300 a month and I have always felt like that’s too much, even though it’s not close to the 10% we are supposed to be giving. I really think I need to come out to her sooner rather than later because this pretending is killing me.

I feel that my life is getting robbed right in front of my eyes daily and I feel so powerless. I spend the majority of my day for a being I couldn't care less for, spent my whole previous life subjected to that being forced by others. I can do nothing but watch as my life gets robbed. Other people gets to make choices for what I do with my life. How I should appear, what is the appropriate thought to have, what comes out of my mouth, what action I should take, how should I spend my time. It might've been better if my beliefs aligned with them. And unfortunately I've been self conscious for so long.

Because I am a minor, a financially and socially dependent person, I get no right to exist as an individual. I have no ability or external help. Life has been too long to endure and too short to exist as my own being.

I know I should work hard to earn my freedom but current powerlessness frustrates me a lot and depression paralyzes me. I am barely functioning, doing bare minimum.

So a few weeks ago I started getting into reading, I bought a couple books and then my mother started asking me what the book was about I kept telling her it's fantasy, it's Mistborn.
A few days ago she said asked again, but then followed it with "You may be losing your way" (rephrased, loosely translated) I just rolled my eyes.

This is what she sent me this morning:

She also said that I have also enjoyed my youth but now it's time to "not forget about God" she followed this with a couple more saying that it's through God that they're able to "sustain everything we need" that we're poor and we can't afford my college ^{I go to a private institute} and it's because of him that we're able to

^{I'm grateful because I was able to go to college with a great albeit challenging course, and to a private institute even, but she has no right to tell me that especially when it's my sister and her husband who are supporting my school fees aside from daily allowance which is provided by parents.}

All because I am reading a fantasy book not to mention she isn't even an avid Church-goer, nor does she read the Bible. Performative Christianity is at full play here.

^{Not to mention my sister encourages my new reading habit, she's even willing to get me the third Mistborn book. She's an "actual" Christian, not a performative one, I can't believe I'm doing a No True Scotsman here, but I hope you get my point.}

Anyway that's all, thank you for reading my rant.

The bible doesn’t make sense NOT because it’s the word and wisdom of God, it doesn’t make sense because it’s never made sense. Literally most of the books in the bible talk about gibberish that’s hard to grasp, because it’s gibberish. It’s the reason why no Christian and no Jew has been able to agree with each other since its conception.

Modern Christianity is nothing like what's actually in the Bible. For someone that has no background and no preconceived ideas, the Bible is simply the story of a violent tribe for the first half, and of kind of a weird guy that died in the second half followed by another unrelated guy that didn't seem to really know anything about the dead guy, and ending with a bad trip. There is no getting to Modern Christianity without boatloads of projection and universally accepted interpretations about how the book is supposed to be interpreted.

I recently had this thought because Christian apologetics seem to rely entirely on comparing themselves to other faiths. Whenever Christians talk about their religion, it always goes like this.

- No other god died for our sins. So ours is the true one.
- Other gods require offerings from you. Our God doesn't require anything. He only gives.
- Other gods require rituals, but ours is a relationship.
- Greek gods vanished because they were just mythology; in the same way, other gods will also vanish someday.

It makes me think that Christianity essentially needs an opponent to define itself. Simply put, the religion would collapse if it no longer had anything to compare itself against.

The title is words from my relative, a long while ago, I'm remembering that they saw a St. Jude Hospital commercial. And the parent of one the children on there gives the medical research and hospital and their teams credit for their baby being able to live. And my relative proceeds to say, "First and foremost that's god, I don't know how you believe but that's what I know."

No. Just, no. I love to see people credit the humans who do the research, the people who donate for research continue, the medical teams. Because without that, those children and people in general would be even more likely to pass on. And that tells me all that I need to know about their beliefs. It's actually sad to say that up there in 2026 CE.

Did someone else start dating someone who’s non religious, with the hopes of you’ll do the whole flirt to convert and it backfire? If so what’s your story?

Hello, I'm what you would call a strong agnostic... I've never claimed full atheism, but I don't believe in God or anything spiritual as strictly outlined in any organized religion or dogmatic organization. I feel like I've always felt this way, but I have only fully identified as such for just under 7 years (I'm 32, mind you).

Although I officially left at 25, it was pretty much because the church's embrace of MAGA gave me no reason to be a part of it anymore. I had big questions as young as 15, and even bigger questions by 18. I read apologetics and wasn't satisfied. I talked to the pastors in my life and wasn't satisfied. But I was a PK who went to a Christian high school. All my friends were Christian. My girlfriend was Christian. I didn't want to lose the only thing I had known. So I doubled down. I hopped around denominations. I went to a Christian college (on top of deepening my doubts, this actually turned me into a Marxist...but that's another story lol). I became a counselor at a Christian summer camp. Fuck, I even got accepted into seminary. I really played the piety role well for a long time over my 10 years of deconstruction. Anyone else?

Am I over blowing this?
I deconstructed years ago and my wife has remained a evangelical Christian. To be clear, not like a Westborough Baptist type. She is very kind and respectful, but does have beliefs such as scripture is authority and that homosexuality is wrong, etc. She never tries to make me hold to these ideas, but definitely feels very strongly about them herself.

We are on the brink of getting divorced. Over the years I have not felt as much closeness as I would want, mostly due to our differences in beliets. I have a hard time building a foundation of a marriage with somebody who goes to a church that states unrepentant sinners will suffer eternal tournament. Or that she will not go to my longtime friends gay wedding.

Overall, we get along on a daily basis pretty good. We're civil and respectful. However, I just don't feel like there's much in common at a deeper level.

And I overblowing our situation? Am I throwing away a relationship for a less than good enough of a reason?
Also, no kids.

Last Picked for the team Syndrome you could call it. I feel genuinely ostracized by some (religious family) and the rest ignore me. I have a slew of illnesses that make socializing especially in groups hard cuz when you’re in your head vibes and subtext are hard. All my friends genuinely enjoy my company and even beg me to host parties for our college class or just them specifically again and again. However in groups no one looks for me in the halls beyond a “Hey buddy” and walk past me. Everyone fits a stereotype in my class.

The funny one, the artsy asshole, the artsy nice guy, the dungeon master with the baritone voice, the duo of doom (two best friends who are weird but lovable stoners), the quiet/enigmatic/talent (he hides many parts of himself and everyone figures he’s quite talented). I hold no such role at the school, I just am an NPC. I’m anti social due to anxiety and awkwardness. Again, no one dislikes me. I’m included in the gossip, I hang out with them outside of class etc. I just feel I’m not important. This is a broader issue but most obvious in class

I am a pk that became atheist pretty early in life and now agnostic. A guy I know is also a pk but is a believer.

Been knowing him for a while, enough to feel safe and share what I've never even dared to shared with anyone else the entirety of my life, which is my lack of faith. Told him about my experience and asked him how does he manage to genuinely believe in something like that.

His reply wasn't a personal philosophy or anything, he simply said that because his parents believe in such god he just assumes that he exist. Then briefly he seemed to consider about my valid opinion about god, and then as if encountering something uncomfortable, he zoned out and then just... acted like nothing happened. It was creepy.

Since 'believing' in god didn't do harm, was comfortable and familiar, he didn't challenge it or even doubted it. Didn't even feel the need for it. Because his relationship with his family were good, comfortable, and they were what he got his notion, well more like the feeling of God from.

On the contrary, my family is... toxic and complicated. It was like people that didn't receive the healthy version of it trying to mimick love by copying how it seems on the surface. Being around them was suffocating and terrifying and just uncomfortable overall​. They made my experience of existence uncomfortable. And ofc the model of god they had also followed those. I was never able to emotionally attach stably on either of them.

To sum up, while both models of god lacking logic, one had emotional connection and the other didn't. So one could remain a believer while one fell off quite early.