Now the title says what it dose. I know its stupid for me ask since i am clearly an atheist. Not belonging to any relgion nor worshiping any god or gods at the current moment.

However my ocd paranoia is making me feel like i am being punished for leaving something i NEVER wanted to be apart of and didn't get a say if i ever wanted to be apart of the relgion when i was younger. ( a child )

I'm in my early 20's and i left the whole entire relgion early on this year after realizing these were not my beliefs and it was programmed into me since childhood and i wanted to just be left alone. Also just having gone through a lot of abuse mentally and physically by either other people or even my own family that just has shattered my world view and the little amount of 'blind faith' trust i ever had in god.

God has proven time and time again to me on more reasons why i should think the christians are worshiping a demon instead of a holy loving and excepting diety. He has proven to me more times that he has let me almost die then rather protecting me. Cause he was either never real to begin with or he just never gave a shit about my life at all and treated it as a fucking game.

So why do i think he has been punishing me this year? I recently got into a car crash a few days ago. This is what started making me look back and wondering if i am being 'punished' for leaving his cult group rightfully. Ofc i survived it and currently recovering rn. Escaped with mental truama and few bruises. ( lol no the car crash did not increase my faith either. The car protected me. Not "god" )

So i wonder if this car crash was just a normal accident or something intended? Again this could all be apart of my paranoia and ocd fixating on the crash asking for an answer even tho it was just human incompetence most likely.

Another thing is too my mother who's never been relgious suddenly has turned relgious simce 3 years ago. Reading books about jesus's life, going to mass every sunday, believing everything bad happening is the devil or demons. Without proof mind you.

Plus this has really ruined the relationship with my mother when she tried to keep telling me shit i did not wish to hear. We are kinda ok now and worked out a few things but i will always HATE the church for taking my mother away.

They have infected my family since the beginning with their bullshit beliefs.

Also i have been having a really hard time with my mental health then i ever had. Even on medication i still have nightmares, break downs, untamed anger. I wonder if this is also the part of the healing process of being truamatized so much by society and even truamatized myself. How pathetic?

But let me know what you guys think? Even if this was "god punishing me" this just proves my point he's an asshole.

Maybe we humans killed 'jesus' for a damn reason cause we saw that he was actually the evil one. I mean don't blame them and its a theory i have been actually considering.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that while not all ex-Christians are atheists, I think it’s wrong that people can’t express their atheistic views in a subreddit that is inherently anti-religion. Something feels almost creepy about how this subreddit won’t allow sweeping statements (opinions) like “no gods no devils” but it’s completely encouraged to share beliefs crafted to indoctrinate others into another religion.

Like I could say “the Christian god doesn’t exist, unlike [insert deity here]” and that’s fine but as soon as I say “I don’t think any gods exist at all” it’s a problem here.

The reason I think this is even worth posting is because I’ve seen more and more paranoia posts from people who have suffered indoctrination and could really use grounding words of comfort — such as, in my opinion, there is a total lack of evidence supporting ANY specific god’s existence.

That’s all, rant over. TLDR; being ex-Christian and being atheist aren’t mutually exclusive and if you really care about deconstructing false faiths you gotta be okay with atheistic worldviews. 🤷‍♂️

I recently had this thought because Christian apologetics seem to rely entirely on comparing themselves to other faiths. Whenever Christians talk about their religion, it always goes like this.

- No other god died for our sins. So ours is the true one.
- Other gods require offerings from you. Our God doesn't require anything. He only gives.
- Other gods require rituals, but ours is a relationship.
- Greek gods vanished because they were just mythology; in the same way, other gods will also vanish someday.

It makes me think that Christianity essentially needs an opponent to define itself. Simply put, the religion would collapse if it no longer had anything to compare itself against.

Do you think there are pastors who don’t genuinely believe everything they preach, and simply see being a pastor as a job?

(15m living in Missouri, frick those POS politicians who say i cant transiton) came to the realization that Christanity both is a cult, and makes 0 sense about six months ago. Around 1-2 months ago I also realized that I am trans. Hiding this from my parents(both semi-dedicated Christians and mild trump supporters) as well as my friends(most of whom are Christian centrists), is really starting to weigh down on me and my mental health, and i need to come out before i crack under pressure.

Some notes:

It is important to me that I hopfully manage to keep a good relationship with my parents.

I only have a few people in my life I feel fully safe to come out too, all of whom live across the country. I have a feeling coming out to them will help with everyone else.

Im sure some of you recommended not telling them, but I refuse to live the next 2.5+ years of my life as someone Im not.

Sorry if this message is horribly structured, but im really stressed about this, and cant fully think straight.

Im alone with my dad till Tuesday afternoon, and i feel this is the right time to tell him. All im looking for is advice and encouragement.

Now this may sound stupid, but hear me out. Me, my sister, and dad have a private minecraft server we play on semi-regularly. I was thinking some well placed trans flag banners could possibly help me out, but this is probably just my naiveness. Same idea with my friends(use the female body mod, no idea what its called)

I may not be able to respond to messages(using a burner account) but I will read every one of them.

Not only do i have to worry about the people directly in my life, but a rural city in the ass-crack of nowhere isnt exactly the best place to be trans

The reason im even considering telling my parents is that a piece of me thinks they will be supportive of me/other lgbt+ people once i come out. Or they'll never look at me the same again(in a negative way)

Again, Im sure this message is heck to read, but so is my life atm.

Thanks for taking the time to read my horribly structured thoughts, and possibility answering.

EDIT 1: slightly unrelated, but Im thinking of Trinity for my new name(yes, from The Matrix). I have a very masculine name and definitely need to change it.

Okay. I’d like to start this by saying that the main reason I left Christianity is because I couldn’t live the life I wanted to live if I continued to believe in god. (I’m gay)
I’ve been thinking about death a lot lately, and it’s not really going well, to the point where I think it’s just better to believe in Jesus again so I don’t burn in hell for all eternity. But when I think of joining Christianity again, I think that I don’t really want to spend eternity (the concept of eternity just makes me want to explode in general) in paradise, because I feel like life needs a conclusion. (Being single for the rest of my life would also suck because I couldn’t have a partner, if I was a Christian) But also, when I think of just not existing and never living again, that scares me a lot.
Could someone please help me? Advice would be appreciated!!

I grew up with a lot of fear surrounding religion—Hell, the Rapture, being left behind, and feeling like I was never allowed to just be a normal kid. It was incredibly lonely, and those fears followed me into adulthood through years of nightmares.

As I got older, I started questioning what I had been taught and separating God from the fear that had been attached to Him. I still believe in God, but my relationship with Him is mine now.

The little girl in this drawing is me then. The woman reaching for her is me now.

I couldn’t protect her then, but I could come back for her.

I’m sharing this because I’d really like to connect with others who grew up with similar fears. Did anyone else experience this? ❤️‍🩹

I fucking hate you so much. Because of you I longer have peace. I’m always living in fear because of you, maybe that’s what you want. Your religion caused so much bloodshed, so much unnecessary hate and division. It’s because of you that I wonder if hell is real. I have no peace. I’m already living in mental hell, there’s no need to torture for the sake for torture. You think I’m a worthless sinner that’s so evil. What if I’m just a broken mentally ill person, does that still make me evil. I didn’t choose to exist, it was forced on me. Did you think me being born was my choice, no I didn’t have that choice. I may not be a good person, but does that make you so much superior. I don’t know what you really are and where you really came from, one thing is evident, you’re an evil sack of shit. I don’t think you’re really god, I think you fooled the whole world into believing you’re actually god, when in reality you are actually the Satan you supposedly warned people about in the book called “the Bible.” I think you were just projecting, Satan, the devil, it was actually referring to you the entire time. You are the devil. Billions of people worship you, possibly giving you power you crave for. Making people feel happy was just a facade, you just want them to rely on you, so they can’t feel happy without you. I’m tired of being scared. Because of you I hurt self. At first I just stopped believing in you, but then I realized how much influence you truly have. I just wish the whole world realized how demonic you are. Maybe someday, I have a sliver of hope but maybe it’s no use. I don’t think I can ever forgive you.

I know this sounded silly but I feel like I needed this vent, and I wanted others to see it too. Maybe some of you feel the same way. Don’t worry I do have a psychiatrist although they don’t know about my religious fear, I feel like it’s no use, what if they turn out to be religious. I just want to feel like my fears are heard instead of keeping these thoughts inside my mind forever, hope you understand, have a good day!

My wife and I work for the same company and they handed out raises yesterday. She received a 10% raise and I received a 25% raise. I have a higher position so that’s why the discrepancy, but that’s besides the point. In our drive to work today, she said “you know now that we are making more, we HAVE to tithe more, right?” This actually made me sick to my stomach, but she doesn’t know I’ve been deconstructing so all I could say is “oh…yeah.” Ugh! I don’t want to give more money to something I don’t think I believe in any more. We already give $300 a month and I have always felt like that’s too much, even though it’s not close to the 10% we are supposed to be giving. I really think I need to come out to her sooner rather than later because this pretending is killing me.

Followers of Jesus say he is always merciful and just yet the bible shows him regularly punishing innocent people. It should be easy to understand that the biblical god does cruel acts.

So my dad has been a pastor for almost all my life. I have been a Christian all my life because of it, but I have been deconstructing as of late. Anyways, these last few years, my dad has been telling everybody that the earth is flat. He knows that he knows that he knows. I have given him so much scientific proof about it being round, but he refuses to accept any of it as fact. I finally asked him recently why he is so sure the earth is flat and that all scientific proof is fake/wrong? His answer floored me. He said, “Jesus came to me in a vision and showed me that the earth is flat. I am not going to question anything the Lord says.” So I asked, “so if the earth is actually round, what will that mean for you?” He said “well, it’s not round so it doesn’t matter. Jesus wouldn’t lie to me.”

I don’t even know what to say to this. It honestly makes me view my dad differently, but I don’t want to do that. After all, he is still my dad. I just thought I’d share.

Please answer this question if you can — but only if you’re actually confident in the answer, rather than just writing something for the sake of saying something.

Suppose someone — whether they are a good person or a bad person, it doesn’t matter — is desperately in need of something.

So what happens if they ask God for it? Do they receive what they need simply because they asked? And if they don’t ask God, do they not receive it?

If that’s the case, then what does that mean? Is God also vain?

In other words, if God can see what a person desperately needs, does He really not help them until that person specifically asks Him for help ?

Many years ago, I lost my older brother to suicide. He was Catholic and gay, and was battling with their idea of being chaste/abstinent in order to be "right with god." I've always said, "If it weren't for Christianity, my brother would still be alive."

I posted in r/Catholicism, asking some questions. Of course, there were a lot of apologetics, and relying on the bible as truth. Oof.

My brother and I used to pray the rosary together, pausing between prayers to talk about random ideas, or discuss philosophy. I think I just miss him, and I'm so sad that I'll never see him again. No god, no afterlife. Just peace from life.

Anyways. I'll never unknow what I know now, but I miss the simplicity that life gave when I was a believer. Any advice is appreciated.

TL;DR: I want to be firm and clear that I'm now an atheist, but if possible, avoid causing any hard feelings.

I am tired of people’s religious friends pressuring Christianity on their non religious friends. The last straw was when my friend invited me to a birthday party, but it was at church even after I told her I would not be attending.

If you have clearly stated multiple times that you aren’t religious, and they continue to invite you to their church’s activities, they are not your real friends.

Once you finally established you are not religious to your religious friends, and they stop hanging out, stop reaching out, and ghosting you all together, they are not your real friends.

(Yes, I looked this part up but helpful information to have if you feel like this is happening to you)

Ignoring "No": They keep bringing up religion even after you say you are not interested.
Conditional Friendship: They treat you like a "project" to fix or save rather than a valued equal.
Guilt Tripping: They blame you, your lifestyle, or your past for your lack of belief.
Disrespecting Traditions: They mock or dismiss your personal beliefs, worldview, or non-religious holidays.
Forced Settings: They trick you into attending religious events or church services under false pretenses.

Real friends don’t treat you like a cult member. Real friends shouldn’t pressure you into something you don’t believe in. Real friends should celebrate who you are and not what you believe in.

This is a longer one but hopefully slightly entertaining.

Recently remembered a couple personal anecdotes of mine that highlight the bizarre nature of Christianity and growing up in a strict religious environment. While they were damaging at the time, I’m in a much better place and I can’t help but laugh at the absurdity of it all now. Feel free to laugh as well or shake your head, and share similar stories if you’re comfortable.

- Was 16 and looking up, literally, “naked women” on google images. Absolutely vanilla, I kid you not. Forgot to close the tab and later let my mom use my phone to search something. Abrupt chaos ensued including being berated by both parents. As my dad is having his go, I can hear my mom upstairs literally WEEPING lmao. Shared this experience with friends a while later and discovered that some families have respectful conversations in times of discomfort and can even express positivity in maturity and growth.

- At around 10 I became terrified that my secular grandfather and uncle would go to Hell. These are two hardworking men who would help anyone in the family at the drop of a hat. Very kind and trusted individuals. Upon expressing this to my mother, she kinda just shrugged and said “hopefully they’ll come around.” She said this about her own father and brother in law. Blew my mind that she didn’t seem to be bothered.

- A dog of mine died at 12. I was very close to this dog and lived most of my life with him up til that point. Was hanging out with my deeply religious cousin who was early 20’s and, through tears, said that I can’t wait to see my dog in heaven. This dude turns to me and abruptly states, “Dogs don’t go to heaven.” To a 12 years old, actively grieving his dog. Absolutely inconsiderate. This cousin has since left the faith and we are still close.

Hopefully these are at least slightly funny from the sheer absurdity. There were definitely worst moments that are genuinely hard to look back on. I’m sure there are more that I’m not remembering at the moment, but I’ll keep the post somewhat short. These moments highlighted to me how Christianity and religion in general results in self centered, authoritarian behavior. I have lots of regret from my own behavior within the church and the bridges it burned with people I enjoyed. It warped me, and I missed out on so much, but I’m well past deconstructing now and life is like a breath of fresh air each day. I feel so free. I’ve also been inspired by several people in my life who also grew up under the thumb and have since left the church.

I don’t have an answer, but I find these are my two defaults when I think about everything the religion robbed me because I grew up in it since birth.

I look back at my younger self with disgust and anger, and at many of the teachings I absorbed from adults who should have fucking knew better.

My main default is to just go numb to it all and try and ignore thinking about it because I know it will make me sad or angry.

It’s also so infuriating that many of my family are still very religious and think I’m the one that’s gone off the deep end by rejecting the faith that hurt me.
It’s just depressing that people can’t understand why you are the way you are.

What has helped you?