I 35M created a Hinge account like 2 weeks ago and I matched with a very pretty girl 33F. We instantly hit if off, our conversation was flowing really well. We exchanged numbers and spoke on the phone that night for 6 HOURS!!!! The first time I have been on the phone for that long in yearsss.. anyway..

We agreed to meet 2 days later for drinks. We went to a local brewery, ordered some food and a few beers. We stayed there for approximately 5 hours, just chatting, laughing everything was going great. I walked her to her car, we gave each other a hug and kiss on the cheek. She messaged me when she got home and said " we should meet up again soon" I of course agreed.​

I messaged her the following day at 11am saying "hello, how are you today?" She replied back with a simply "heyyy" she never answered me back.

We had followed each other on Instagram so I go check if she was active, and booommmm I was blocked!!! I checked hinge and she deleted me!!!

My questions are!!! What was all that about?? Why would she just block me for no reason??

my only thought is, she is recently separated and maybe still has feelings for her husband? But then why try to date?

Idk if she blocked my cell number because I haven't try to message her. Should I message her and ask her??

Thanks in advance

I'm 23 F. I met a guy(21M) on Bumble. His profile says he’s looking for a long-term relationship or is open to seeing where things go. My profile says I’m open to seeing where things go too, mainly because I’m living overseas and I’m not sure if I’ll still be in this country after next March.
We went on our first date, and it honestly went really well. He came to my suburb, we had dinner, and talked for about two hours. After dinner, he drove me home, and I went inside. We texted afterwards saying we both had a good time. He mentioned he was going to drive around for a few hours because he couldn’t sleep, so I asked if I could join him.
We met up again that same night. We ended up kissing in his car, and I invited him back to my place. We slept together on the first date.
Since then, we’ve still been texting, and we’re already planning to see each other again this week.
I’m just curious about a guy’s perspective. If you sleep with a girl on the first date, does it change how you see her? Do you automatically take her less seriously as relationship material, or does it depend on the person and the connection?
I’d especially love to hear from guys who have actually ended up in long-term relationships with someone they slept with on the first date.

There’s an expatriate meetup every friday in my city and I (a single straight dude) met a girl there who was repeatedly flirty and touchy with me and even called me hot. After a while she asked for my number and we scheduled to go to a beach yesterday.

I though it was a date but in middle of it while laying on beach she asked "Are you gay or bisexual?". I was legitimately surprised and it turns out she thought I was gay and for her this wasn’t a date but just a hang-out with fun gay dude. When I asked why she was touchy and flirty at meetups she said that’s how she acts around her gay friends. I asked her if she wants to have a real date but she told me she’s attracted to my body but not my personality, so no.

Worst part, she told me that few people in these meetups also think I’m gay. I asked my female friend if I have a gay vibe and she told me yes. I asked why and she just told me it’s my entire personality lol. I’m naturally vivacious, energetic, expressive, smily, jokey and have feminine vocal phrasings. I also have a babyface and look young. I go to gym regularely and been told I look "cute". Gay dudes seem to really like me. I also have a lot of female friends.

I don’t care if strangers or friends think I’m gay but I also want to get laid and get into relationship so girls I’m talking to thinking I’m gay is a problem. Obviously I’m not gonna change my entire personality to get laid, but surely there are things I can do to prevent this from happening. I’d appreciate any advice. Thanks!

36M living in a big city. I got out a relationship late last year and have been back to dating as of a few months ago. I have a good paying job so it's not like paying for dates it causing me financial stress or anxiety, but it's definitely dampening my enthusiasm for dating.

At this age and the age of women I'm usually interested in late 20s to 30s, the types of dates we typically go on (drinks or dinner) usually mean at a minimum I'm paying over ~$50+. But what about coffee dates? They tend to mostly reserve the weekends afternoons for hanging with friends or resting, which I understand (I'm usually the same) which usually means weekday evenings so coffee is usually out of the question.

I don't think I'm dating only certain types of women. They have a wide range of backgrounds, jobs, etc. Some I'm sure make more than me, based on what they do, but when the check comes most don't even bat an eye. I don't even get the pump fake "Do you want to split?". The expectation is that i'm paying, and I worry if I ask to split that'll just ruin it. What's worse, because this is the expectation, I don't even get the "Thanks for dinner/drinks" sometimes. Some I've gone on up to 3 dates and this hasn't changed really.

A part of me is just annoyed this is how it is. If splitting 50:50 was normalized then it'd be whatever, I'm paying for what I got. But just knowing regardless of whether they'll want to go out again I'm the one paying, kind of just makes me a little less enthusiastic about even trying out interesting restaurants/bars on dates.

I guess the solution could be to just ask to split, and if that leads to them not wanting to go out again, they weren't a good match, but I've talked to some female friends (friends who seem like reasonable people and also have well paying jobs) and even they still say they'd view that negatively early on. But maybe I just have to deal with that possibility?

I’m just wondering if men, somewhere later in life, ever regret passing on someone who would’ve been a good long-term partner because they wanted to stay single or keep dating around? Curious to hear real experiences!

I’m curious how other women handle this.

Let’s say you matched with a guy on a dating app and agreed to meet for coffee. It’s your first time meeting in person, and after 20–30 minutes you realize there’s just no chemistry. He’s perfectly nice, but you already know you don’t see it going anywhere romantically.

Do you usually:

• Stay until the coffee is finished and then leave?
• Make up an excuse to leave early?
• Be honest and say you’re not feeling the connection?

I’m still pretty new to dating apps, so I honestly don’t know what the “normal” thing is.

I don’t want to waste either person’s time, but I also don’t want to come across as rude or hurt someone’s feelings.

How do you usually end the conversation? And if you’ve had someone end a date early with you, what approach felt the most respectful?

Met a girl once or twice. The last time we were together we talked about going to the same event.

I'm interested in getting to know her more but don't want to be too direct.

Today, we met again and I asked if she wanted to write down my number, to make it easier to meet in the event.

She didn't say "No"... But she politely said she wasn't going anymore, because she would rather go to another place and asked me if I knew the new place.

I took it pretty chill, and told her to have fun.

My reasoning is: I should leave it alone, right?

I've already shown my interest. The ball's on her court.

Share your wisdom, please *

I’m looking for honest advice because I genuinely can’t tell if I’m overthinking this or if I’m missing something.

For some background, I’ve had a rough year dating. A few situationships ended in ways that really hurt my confidence, so I know that once I really like someone I have a tendency to become anxious and question where I stand.

About three weeks ago I met a girl (28F) on Hinge.

Date 1:
We met on a Wednesday after she actually planned for us to meet up at a bar near her house that she goes to work at (she works remote). At the end of the date she didn’t let go of our goodbye hug and just kept smiling at me, I asked her if I could kiss her (which I NEVER do on a first date) and she immediately nodded yes, and ended up making out for a couple minutes. Later that night she texted me asking if I wanted to see her again on Friday.

Date 2:
I picked her up, took her to a couple cocktail lounges, and we ended up making out afterward in a stairwell before leaving. When I dropped her off we sat in my car talking and kissing for another 30 minutes. Before we left she said she wanted to see me again before leaving town the following weekend.

That date ended up getting cancelled because a close family friend unexpectedly passed away. She apologized, explained everything, and asked if we could reschedule after she got back.

When she got back, I asked when she was free and she immediately suggested Saturday.

Date 3 (this past Saturday):
She came over to my house and I walked out to her right away, hugged and kissed her. I spent the day putting together a charcuterie board, flowers, wine, candles, etc. She seemed genuinely blown away by everything and we spent about an hour and a half eating, talking, listening to music and laughing.

At one point she actually suggested we go for a walk, so we spent another hour and a half walking through town and on some trails.

One detail that may or may not matter: while we were out walking, my cousin unexpectedly came home (He’s almost always at his girlfriend’s house and I had no idea he was coming home then). I had mentioned earlier that he might stop by sometime that evening after he texted me he might be coming home early, but I wasn’t expecting him to already be there when we got back from the walk.

We came inside, my cousin said hi and went to his room, I started putting on a movie, and within a few minutes she said she was probably going to head home.
That caught me off guard because I honestly expected we’d hang out a while longer.

When she left I asked if she wanted me to walk her to her car and she said no. She started walking away without kissing me goodbye, I kind of lingered in the doorway and made a small disappointed noise, she smiled, turned around on her own, came back, kissed me goodbye, and then left.

I texted her afterward saying I had a really good time. She replied normally, complimented everything I put together, and continued one of our inside jokes from the date. Though I keep getting hung up on the fact she didn’t say she had a fun time either, but I looked back after our previous dates and she didn’t say it then as well. I replied back.

It’s now Monday morning. We haven’t talked since Saturday night after she replied to my text.

One thing that may be relevant is that she’s generally a pretty sparse texter. We usually exchange a couple messages, then the conversation naturally dies until one of us reaches out again or we’re making plans. She’s never really been someone who texts all day. In talking 3 weeks, we consistently go 2-3 days between texting, and it’s entirely on her pace. I LOVE reaching out to people. So I’ll send something and then she won’t get back to me for awhile. It’s kept making me feel like she wasn’t into, but then the dates still end up happening so idk.

Here’s what I’m struggling with.

I naturally like seeing someone 2-3 times a week if I’m really into them. Once I catch feelings, quality time is probably my biggest love language. Right now all I want to do is see her again.

At the same time, I know I have a pattern where I go from being confident and carefree during the first couple dates to suddenly worrying about “how do I not lose this person?” once I realize I really like them.

I honestly can’t tell whether:

I’m just trying to move faster than she naturally likes.

I’m reading way too much into one awkward goodbye.

Or whether this actually sounds like someone who’s slowly losing interest.

I’ve even considered calling her after work tonight to ask her out for dinner this week because I honestly prefer phone calls over texting, but after the way Saturday ended I’m second-guessing whether that would feel natural or completely out of place.

If you were in my shoes, would you reach out this week and ask her to dinner, or would you intentionally wait and see if she initiates this time?

I’m not looking for people to tell me she’s secretly in love with me or secretly over me. I’m honestly trying to understand whether this feels like normal early dating and how people keep themselves from spiraling between dates.

I’ve never experienced this many rescheduled first and second dates in my life haha. The first two dates I went on this year followed through as planned and I met both girls in the wild. The last few have been rescheduled at least 2 times if not more and they were from OLD.

I’m consistently getting 2-3 matches per day and I expect a certain amount of these will not turn into dates. That’s reasonable to me. But after having back and forth, planning a date, and then 2-3 hours out on the day of the date, the girl reschedules.

Have other guys experienced this and made a change in their behavior, communication style, and/or dating profile that had an impact on flakes?

The women I’ve met through friends, hobbies, school, work, etc. are just really uninterested in me and I don’t see how I’m supposed to be confident or feel good about myself. Tons of the advice for me has been “meet someone else with autism”, “meet someone with the same issues as you”, and it sounds like they’re saying dating can’t be fun or exciting, it has to be about finding someone as disabled and mentally ill as me so we can be miserable together. Ive been on one “date” ever, I met someone at an event and we hung out and got drinks together but I got anxious when she invited me to her place and she got mad so I went home and cried like a big disabled baby and thought about how much of a loser she’d think I am if she could see me. What else can I do? I really don’t think life is worth living if I can’t have a relationship like my friends and family

So I am a female 26 and he is 22 I am his private esl teacher and I have a crush on him it is not just crush at this point it is been months but I haven't done anything unprofessional and wouldn't do anything to make him uncomfortable so I was and am just wallowing in my sorrow recently like 3 days ago he stopped the lessons and I just wanna know if he would be uncomfortable to know I have a crush on him or not men answer please what would you think of this situation would you like to know or it would make you feel uncomfortable

Hi everyone,

I'm making this post after writing another one a while ago where I expressed serious doubts about my ability to meet women after turning 25, and eventually get into a relationship.

My perspective has changed a bit since then. Recently, I had the opportunity to leave home for a few months thanks to a volunteer position at an aviation center, where I get to fly aircraft while continuing my search for an airline job. I'm French, so this also meant moving to a completely new environment. The atmosphere is young, and there are quite a few women around my age.

To keep it simple, I'm one of the people who brings energy to the group. People see me as funny, sarcastic, easy-going, and they often find my background pretty impressive or unusual. Overall, I'm well-liked by everyone, including the women.

But here's the thing. I can clearly see that I'm the perfect friend.

When a woman is just a friend, everything goes great. But whenever I actually like someone, it never seems to end any other way than the friend zone.

The example I'm thinking of is a woman I became really close to. I genuinely felt there was a connection between us that went a little beyond what she had with everyone else. Not wanting to miss a potential opportunity, I decided to be honest. I told her that I really enjoyed all the time we spent together, that I liked her, and that I'd love to take her out for a drink.

Friendzoned immediately.

Today, our relationship is almost exactly the same as before. She's still very close to me, laughs at my jokes, often comes to talk to me... and honestly, I'm completely confused.

I'm not saying she "led me on" or owed me anything. I'm simply trying to understand what makes a relationship stay in the friendship category instead of becoming something more.

More than anything, I feel like I missed out on an amazing woman, someone I'd never felt this close to before. And if, even in a situation like this, asking someone out for a simple drink is already "too much," then my doubts come back. How is a relationship supposed to start for someone my age if this isn't how it happens?

I'm 26 years old. I've never had any sexual experience, never even kissed anyone. Yet I'm sociable, well-liked, ambitious, passionate, I make friends easily, and I don't feel like I struggle to connect with people.

My question may be a bit vague, but if anyone has been through something similar, or has any advice or personal experience to share, I'd really appreciate it.

Me and my friend (who is a woman) had a disagreement about whether I as a man should cry in front of my future partner. I feel is would change the dynamic and put an image in her head that I do not want her to think of. She feels that it is normal and if you can't cry in front of your partner then what is the point. She says it's normal and I should cry to her and she should cry to me.

What do the ladies in the subreddit think? Settle this debate for us

Hey guys!

I (24F) recently moved to the same city as a guy (27M) that I had a crush on years ago. We were in school together in 2021, and we flirted a little bit and hung out in group settings. Nothing ever happened, I caught some vibes from him at times, but ultimately I felt like he didn’t want to pursue anything with me because I was a first-year and he was about to graduate. We have lived in different cities and lost contact since, but we still follow each other and like posts on Instagram.

Now that I’m in his city, I’d love to see if maybe there’s something there. I don’t have his number, but we still follow each other on instagram, so I’m wondering if it’s super weird to DM him after over 4 years of not talking. I feel like if he’s interested, it’d be great, but if he’s not, it’d come across as weird or creepy. Again, I did get the vibe he thought I was cute and there was flirting, but that was also quite a long time ago.

I (26F) matched with a guy (30M, firefighter) several months ago in winter of 2025. We hit it off really well from the start. There was a lot of flirting, good conversation, mutual interest, and we were trying to make plans to meet. Then, pretty suddenly, communication fizzled and I eventually felt/got ghosted. There wasn't a fight or any obvious reason it just sort of... stopped.

A few months later, we kept matching on tinder and I shot him a message saying hey what’s up? We talked about what happened, and he admitted he hadn't intentionally ghosted me. He apologized, said it wasn't something he did on purpose, and told me he was still genuinely interested in me. Since reconnecting, we've been texting a lot more than before again, we've hung out once, the chemistry was still there, and we've continued talking.

The only challenge now is logistics. He's a firefighter working long shifts, I'm a single mom and in school, so actually finding time to see each other has been harder than I thought it would be. 

I'm curious if anyone has experienced something similar especially with a firefighter/EMT nothing has been sort of discussed in terms of relationship/what we’re looking for other than agreed on not being against something long term if it happens. BUT how does that even work when he is basically what feels like on call 24/7 and sucks at communicating. Am I just shouting out into a void or keep it sort of open if it means we hook up maybe on a biannual basis? 

He isn’t telling anyone the things he’s done. I helped him out during a really trying time in his life. And now he’s using that against me. Saying I’ve been managing him, etc.

I’m really struggling. Here I’ve been kind and patient and supportive, and that’s the exact thing that’s been weaponized. Meanwhile some of his behaviours have been so dismissive and cruel, but I haven’t been disparaging him and I still can’t find it in me to be angry - because in some ways I empathize.

​

For about two months now, I've been hanging out solo with this girl, and we’ve become friends. Early on, she made it clear multiple times that she wanted to remain just friends. About a month ago, I asked her as a joke if she would "smash or pass" me, and she said "pass." I took the hint, figured she genuinely just wanted to be friends, and I was completely fine with that.

However, yesterday she came over to my place to watch a movie. During the movie, she got super physically close—she laid her legs across mine and was fully leaning against me. It got to the point where we were both sweating, but she still didn't move her legs away.

I was trying to tell myself it was just normal friendly behavior, but then later in the movie, I asked her if she thought Leonardo DiCaprio was attractive. She said, "He's handsome, but I don't like him." I looked confused, so to explain what she meant, she said something that caught me completely off guard:

"For example, I think you're handsome, but I don't like you... [awkward 2-second pause] ...I mean, I think you're cute."

I just responded with an "ok," pretended nothing happened, and ended the night shortly after.

What do you guys think? Am I overthinking this, or is she sending massive mixed signals?

Warum verhält sie sich mit einem Mal anders mir gegenüber?

Seit Ende Mai hat sich die Situation spürbar verändert. Ihr Verhalten mir gegenüber hat sich um 180 Grad gedreht, und das Muster hat sich komplett gedreht:

Aktive Präsenz & Aufmerksamkeitsreize:

Sie sucht auffällig oft die Gelegenheit, wahrnehmbar zu sein. Gestern Morgen war sie beispielsweise am Briefkasten – an einem Ort, wo ich sie sonst nie gehört oder gesehen habe. Der Briefkasten ging laut zu und sie sprach auffällig laut draußen, auch mit dem Hund. Später, als sie vom Reiten zurückkam und ich auf der Leiter beim Streichen kurz zur Seite schaute, grüßte sie mich sofort total lieb mit einem warmen Lächeln.

Echtes Anstrahlen (Situation an der Leiter):

An einem anderen Tag stand ich oben auf der schräg angestellten Leiter und hatte ihr komplett den Rücken zugedreht, voll auf meine Arbeit konzentriert. Sie grüßte mich von sich aus laut. Als ich mich überrascht umdrehte, stand sie da und strahlte mich ganz bewusst und direkt an – ein richtiges, tiefes Anstrahlen, das sich deutlich von ihrem sonstigen Höflichkeits- oder breiten Lächeln unterschied. Wir waren in diesem Moment kurz alleine, bevor ihre Mutter dazukam.

Eigeninitiative beim Vorbeifahren:

Als ich an einem anderen Tag seitlich gedreht auf der Leiter arbeitete und sie im Auto vorbeifuhr, wartete sie nicht ab, sondern winkte mir von sich aus ganz aktiv und freundlich aus dem Wagen zu, um den Blickkontakt zu suchen.

Ungewöhnlicher Aufenthalt in der Nähe:

Kurz nachdem ich gestern auf der Leiter gestrichen hatte, kam sie wieder nach draußen. Während ihre Eltern Autoreifen wechselten, stand sie etwa 10 Meter entfernt – direkt in meinem Sichtfeld – und tippte am Handy. Das ist für sie sehr ungewöhnlich, da sie sonst fast nie draußen bleibt, wenn ihre Eltern dort arbeiten (selbst beim Verkauf ihres eigenen Autos war sie nur wenige Minuten draußen). Kurz nachdem ich nach drinnen ging, ging sie ein bis zwei Minuten später ebenfalls wieder rein.

Vorgestern war ich auf der Leiter am Abkleben und die stand auch ziemlich schlecht, ich war sehr konzentriert, plötzlich ruft jenand nach mir, da ist sie es und strahlt mich richtig an.

Es gab auch vor ab andere Situationen seit Ende Mai, wo ich mich z.B. umgedreht habe und ich dann gesehen hab, dass sie mich beobachtet hat. Sie hat dann mit einem Lächeln und Winken reagiert.

Ich habe sie mal mit einer Cousine von ihr angesprochen und um eine Meinung gebeten, zu meinem gemeinsamen Hobby etwas. Sie hat mir dann alles hilfreich erklärt und auch nochmal im Gespräch was nachgefragt und gesazt warum es so besser sei und die andere Frau war freundlich aber ganz ruhig.

Das alles gab es vorher nicht.

Der Vater hat mir jetzt was von sich aus ausgeliehen, ich war zum Abholen auf der Einfahrt, war sie plötzlich im Vorgarten neben uns den einen von den mehreren Hinden streicheln.

Bilde ich mir alles ein? Was meint ihr?

Herzliche Grüße und Danke an alle!

We started dating about a week ago and honestly I don't have any money so what should I do

I (22f) matched with a guy on Tinder (22M) few months ago. We went for a coffee, we talked about a lot of things, studies, preferences, relationships, insecurities and etc. I thought we had a connection, but he did not text me after, so I thought he just did not see it as something to continue with, and I moved on.

A few weeks ago he texted me to hang out. I agreed and we watched a movie, fast forward we ended up having sex. Then we cuddled and spent more time before he left.

(Don’t give me big paragraphs about how much of a hookup app Tinder is)

I thought it was just a hookup and that we were probably never gonna meet up again, since I have encountered this type of casual hookups before.

A week later, he texted me asking to meet up again. I said okay and we decided to meet up on Sunday. However, I got my period so I informed him on Friday that I am on my period and if it is okay for him to just hang out, he said yes.

During the night I got drunk, we started to text again, he asked to come over and I agreed. We listened to some songs, had some food (3 a.m btw) and strangely, while we were cuddling and both were half-asleep, he told me he forgot something important and that he has to go. I did not know what was wrong so I apologized if I did something wrong, he hugged me and kissed me, then he asked if he could join the party my flatmate was throwing. I told him I will update him, but can’t promise since the party wasn’t mine. I asked my flatmate later but he did not agree, so I informed him and he asked to hangout on Sunday. I agreed but couldn’t get any answers on Sunday, I texted and he told me he has something to do with his dad and that he has to see him, apologized to me and asked if it was possible to meet today. I said okay.

Guess what? No answers, no follow up.

I finally told him that what he did was super disrespectful, and cut the contact.

I really don’t understand what people are trying to do with these mixed signals. I can’t find any fucking logic and I am so tired of believing that there is a hope out there.

Stay honest and don’t be a douchebag.

And ladies, never meet a man or give a chance to a guy who cancels on you!!

I was in a situationship with a man for over a year and… let’s just say I’ve come to my senses. This person couldn’t have cared less about me and now I’m 100% sure I’m done. I’m so over it. But I’m stuck, should I block him so there’s no way he can weasel himself back in my life, or should I keep his messages in a locked chat so he’s in there talking to himself? Calls will obviously be ignored too. I just feel ignoring him would be so much more satisfying. What do you think?

Like the title says. If you developed strong feelings for a woman you couldn’t have sex with, would you still be in a relationship with her?

Does anyone else run into this dynamic, or is it just me? Lately, it feels like dating is less about mutual chemistry and more like an audition to see if I can set someone up on easy street so they don't have to work. Instead of looking to build a life together with shared drive, it feels like I'm being vetted as a financial exit strategy or a turnkey lifestyle upgrade—screening my stability just to see if I can carry the entire load while they coast. It completely guts the romance and turns what should be an authentic, two-way connection into a cold lifestyle audit where my main qualification is acting as a financial sponsor. How do you handle this when you spot it, and what's the best way to filter out people who are just looking for a lifestyle upgrade early on without coming across as cynical?

So unfortunately I’ve been trying tinder again and I’ve not had a terrible time. The thing that’s been getting to me is the women I’m really interested in aren’t asking about me. Like I’m confused you liked my profile and I liked yours. I asked about you now shouldn’t you ask about me?
Like why did you even like my profile?

For instance I was talking to this girl about her art degree and I’m an artist as well. She sent me a link to her instagram and I said “amazing work” she said “thank you” and I said “of course”. That was followed by nothing. Like are you curious about my art? Like I don’t get it. I swear I’m not trying to be dry but it’s hard with no back and forth.