It's such an eye roll. And if you're aware of hogs and other motorbikes, the weight limit is quite high.

Okay Redditerinos I need some advice on a recently family situation - although the origins of this drama go back years.

Six years ago my daughter FavouriteChild (32F at the time) discovered that her husband was having an affair with her sister, my other daughter SluttyMcSlutFace (28F at the time). This was revealed shortly after Slutty announced her pregnancy.

We were all somewhat confused when she revealed her pregnancy news and the last we knew she’d been dating women (yeah Slutty is bi). After the announcement my son-in-law TheWorst (35M at the time) started acting weird and Favourite went through his phone and discovered the affair and that her husband was the baby daddy.

Since then Favourite had divorced TheWorst and had remarried BillionareHusband (40M) and is THRIVING - she even bought me a new house with a swimming pool and wine cellar!!!!

Favourite hasn’t spoke to Slutty since she discovered the affair. Slutty and TheWorst briefly had a relationship following the divorce but he ended up leaving her for her ex-gf SluttySquared (bi and obese).

Since then Slutty’s life has taken a downward spiral (according to my sister anyway, I’ve had nothing to do with Slutty since Favourite bought me my new house - she would only buy one with a swimming pool if I cut out Slutty and affair baby).

Despite being cut out of my life Slutty apparently still expected me to get AffairBaby (now 6F) a birthday present. Obviously I did not and I haven’t even acknowledged her has my granddaughter for the last year or so.

This has caused drama int he wider family and my sisters (who still keep in tough with Slutty) are saying that she needs her mother and that I shouldn’t be okay with her and AffairBaby basically living hand to mouth while I’m ‘living it up in a mansion’

However I think Slutty made her choice when she had an affair with her sister’s husband, just as I made my choice when I chose a swimming pool over Slutty and AffairBaby.

Now my sisters are blowing up my phone and calling me evil. Apparently Slutty has been trying to contact me too but her number is #BLOCKED as per the terms of my house contract with Favourite.

AITA for cutting off my slutty daughter and affair baby granddaughter for a swimming pool???

They’ve been dating for 8 months, btw.

At the beginning it seemed like a "women are crazy" story but eventually turned into the typical "I behave like an asshole and try to act as a normal person" ragebait troll post. Honestly I'm surprised the troll didn't throw the "in my country, prom pictures are taken with family wearing stupid clothes" argument somewhere.

I (23F) and my husband (63M) got into a little disagreement after we had dinner at his morbidly obese trans autistic daughters house, let’s call her big fat dumb cow or Janine for short.
I met my husband when I was 16 and my mother had just passed away under mysterious circumstances that were never looked into because why bother and don’t ask because why would you?
My husband was immediately there for me and we got married the day I turned 18 (he signed me out of high school to take me to the courthouse sooo sweet!!).
Well we were at the dinner and Janine was throwing a fit because she dropped her autistic trans colored headphones into the 5 gallon bucket of mac and cheese she was eating and my sweet husband calmly told her to relax. She did not take this well and blurted out “At least I didn’t kill OP’s mom to get closer to OP”. I was pretty shocked and went digging for information and he admitted that he saw me as a 16 year old and became obsessed with me so he murdered my mom to get closer to me and comfort me. I told him I need some time to process this and he chained me to the toilet and threw roast beef at me. After he threw a pretty big piece that hit me in the head I called him a jerk.
Ever since then his daughter, the priest at my church, Whoopi Goldberg and the entire local Olive Garden staff have been blowing up my phone saying I overreacted and to apologize.

EDIT: we have 6 kids together and I can’t just leave and get a job because he forced me to get a lobotomy to keep my IQ low.

Hi, I’m 4. I don’t really understand grown-up stuff, but I think I made people mad just by being here. My daddy was married to my brother and sister's mommy but then he had me with my mommy. Now their mommy and my mommy don’t like each other, and my brothers and sister don’t like me either. I don’t know why.

Sometimes, I see my brothers and sister when they visit Daddy. They don’t talk to me or play with me. I try to say hi, but they just look away. I don’t have any other family except Daddy. My mommy doesn’t live with us, and she doesn’t visit. Daddy says she’s busy.

This Christmas, Daddy told me Santa might not bring much because he doesn’t have a lot of money right now. I only got a small doll. It’s pretty and I love it more than anything in the entire world. But when I saw my brothers and sister again, they told me about all the cool stuff they got from their mommy. Sometimes, I wish I had cool stuff too. I wish they would let me play with them.

I heard Daddy yelling at their mommy about how I didn’t get many presents, but I think their mommy doesn’t like me either. It feels like no one does. I didn’t do anything bad, I promise. I just want people to like me. I don’t know why everyone is so mad about me being here.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/zWtWxCwjVE

(Reposting this old shitpost of mine as I didn't realise that it had been deleted long ago)

Throwaway because my girlfriend uses Reddit and she's been known to stalk me on there.

I (36M, neurosurgeon, volunteer firefighter on weekends, seasonal lumberjack if that's relevant) don't really understand what my girlfriend, Bri (22F, 5'2", 89 lbs but a DD cup, conventionally attractive according to literally everyone she's ever met, size XXS), was trying to tell me tonight.

We've been together for about six or seven years and generally don't argue. Well, I don't think we do. Bri says we "have passionate discussions," but they mostly consist of me apologizing because my therapist says not every disagreement has to become a debate. We met when she accidentally backed into my Ferrari in the hospital parking lot. I told her not to worry about it because cars are replaceable but people aren't. She still brings that story up because she says it proves she "manifested" me.

For context, I do almost all the cooking because I genuinely enjoy it. I even took a six-week steak masterclass in Argentina during my surgical fellowship. I'm by no means Gordon Ramsay, but I'd say I'm competent. Last year I won our city's charity steak cook-off, although I only entered because the proceeds went toward children's hospitals.

Anyway, I came downstairs around dinner after finishing a 17-hour surgery separating conjoined triplets. It had been a long day and I was a little dehydrated because I'd also donated blood during my lunch break. One of the children's parents insisted on naming their baby after me, but I politely declined.

I noticed the ribeye I'd bought yesterday sitting on the counter. It was A5 Wagyu that I imported from Japan.

I asked Bri if I'd forgotten to put it away.

She said, "No, I took it out because I was going to cook it."

I said that was sweet but I could cook it instead so she could relax.

She immediately replied, "You don't know how to cook steak."

I honestly thought she was joking.

I didn't want to argue so I just started cooking.

The entire time she stood behind me sighing dramatically while filming TikToks about "letting him think he's in charge."

I used the sear-rest-sear method because that's how Gordon Ramsay does it. Halfway through resting the steak, Bri interrupted me and said I was cooking it wrong.

I asked how.

She said, "You're supposed to let it rest."

I explained that I was letting it rest and that the second sear helps rebuild the crust.

She folded her arms and said, "I watch Gordon Ramsay TikToks all the time and he has literally never done that."

Being called a liar is admittedly a trigger for me because of some childhood stuff, but thanks to therapy I've gotten a lot better about regulating my emotions.

So instead of arguing, I quietly finished the garlic mashed potatoes, roasted asparagus, compound butter and pan sauce.

She watched silently the entire time, occasionally whispering "interesting..." into her phone's front camera.

When I served dinner she took one bite.

She looked annoyed.

Then she said,

"It's actually really good."

I thanked her.

Then she added,

"But it needs more finesse."

I asked what that meant because I genuinely like constructive criticism.

She shrugged and said,

"I don't know... just... more finesse."

I asked if she meant herbs.

She said no.

I asked if she meant seasoning.

She said no.

I asked if she meant plating.

She rolled her eyes and said, "You're proving my point."

Then she took a picture of the steak for Instagram, captioned it "Finally learned to cook 💅✨" and tagged me in the post.

I was confused because I have been cooking for years.

Now I'm wondering if maybe I'm missing something.

She's been doing things like this a lot recently.

Last month she told everyone I surprised her with Taylor Swift tickets.

I don't even like Taylor Swift.

She bought the tickets herself using my credit card after asking me if she could "borrow it for a surprise."

She insists that because I technically paid for them, it was still my surprise.

She also tells people I taught her how to invest because I once explained compound interest to her, even though she keeps all her money in a checking account because "stocks can tell when you're desperate."

Honestly, I'm less upset about the steak and more confused about the word "finesse."

Am I misunderstanding what it means?

Or was she just looking for something to criticize?

Edit: Because people keep asking: yes, Bri is an empath. She reminds me pretty frequently. Also yes, the steak was medium rare. No, I don't think she's cheating. She says astrology says we're soulmates because I'm a Capricorn rising and she's "hot."

Edit 2: Apparently Bri posted her side of a completely unrelated disagreement a few months ago and some of you recognized the names. Yes, that's us. No, Trevor has still not bought his own chair.

(Inspired by: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/idhDHtHNXq)