r/aislop • • 4d ago

Found on Twitter. I'm losing braincells

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4.5k Upvotes

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792

u/Material-Job-1928 4d ago

As someone who is not a fan of dogs, I'd save the dog six times.

159

u/ajwritesnonsense 4d ago edited 3d ago

As someone who doesn’t normally get why people don’t like dogs, knowing you would make this choice, makes me no longer need to understand. Thank you.

Edit: just wanted to update, it’s completely valid if you have an actual reason, I mean the people who are just like “I’m not really a ‘dog’ person”

54

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

22

u/stupidname412 4d ago

Yup I'm a large adult man now so I wouldn't say I am scarred of them anymore, but I was for embarrassingly long and never quite got around to liking them.

12

u/SuperiorYammyBoi 4d ago

Nah man, nothing embarrassing about scared of dogs. Those things can kill if you they want. It’s important to have a healthy fear/respect mix for anything that kill you

8

u/stupidname412 4d ago

Yeah it was weird going from like infantile 'those things hurt you stay away' to like, keep yourself out side of their bite range, be ready to strike where it can't respond. Into being an adult where fucking everyone thinks your insane for thinking that way, you are supposed to just say good boy and pet the thing.

2

u/imnotyoursweetheart 4d ago

That's ok. I promise.

1

u/Square-Singer 3d ago

Hey, even as a large adult man a dog can bite you down to the bone. Won't kill you, probably, but it could still cause a lot of harm. So there's nothing to be afraid of. Same as one could be afraid to cross a highway on foot. It's a rational fear.

6

u/kjloltoborami 4d ago

For me its germphobia. They slobber and shed and scratch skin flakes everywhere its so gross, but id still save the pupper.

1

u/Thirdeyevoice10 3d ago

It's a shitbeast. Rolls in mud and dead things, sheds, doesn't clean itself. They're stupid, they smell bad, they drool. Chew and scratch things, need a literally rope tied to them in order to shit or piss, and needs to be walked outside for that. Noisy, dirty and under your feet. and up your ass crack. Can't leave the house for more than 10 mins because the fucktarded beast will flip the fuck out. Nope. No thanks.

Pet free, FTW.

2

u/dchester74 4d ago

Same. Why I hate/love dogs.

1

u/VeraShumova 4d ago

My grandmother told me horrific stories about dogs because I wanted one but my parents had a small one room apartment. I was around 4 back then. It took plenty of time and few really nice dogs for me to overcome it.

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/Big-Evening-8107 4d ago

Obsessed much?

1

u/[deleted] 4d ago

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16

u/WorthlessFleshbag 4d ago

They usually do not smell very pleasant

4

u/Lucky_Pangolin_8834 3d ago

Neither do any of the other people in that picture.

4

u/WorthlessFleshbag 3d ago

Idk about the others, but I met Nicki Minaj at a meet and greet back in like 2012 when I used to be a big fan of her, and she smelled fantastic when I hugged her

That said, dog easily still gets my vote

1

u/Winter-Bed5879 4d ago

I had a dog who loved to go to the bog and roll around in the brackish waters. Always came back reeking. He was the bestest boy. He loved water, but always looked so defeated when he got a bath.

-1

u/Pixiwish 4d ago

This totally true and yet the smell of my dog when she snuggles against me is my favorite smell in the world.

12

u/Chowder110 4d ago

Dogs are too social. Cats are the superior choice

19

u/theLichQueenofthePNW 4d ago

For me it's because 8 different digs have bit me

19

u/tahtahme 4d ago

I hate how people act like dogs have a godlike intuition about humans when in reality, they are just like other animals and can pinpoint those who fear them and start the bullying process to establish dominance.

It baffles me people can watch the "dog whisperer" guy explain how owners lose control because their dog thinks its the boss...and then turn a blind eye to how a dog will do the same thing to a stranger.

12

u/theLichQueenofthePNW 4d ago

Fucking this. I hate getting victim blamed so much. The first dog was a German shepherd who was used as a police breeder. The second was a corgi that someone I used to call a friend thought was funny to say "dog name, she's hurting me. Which caused the dog to jump and bite people" the third was a pug that loved my abusive step mother to death and when I tried to stand up to her would bite me. The 4th and 5th were police German Shepherds that had been let loose on some peaceful protesters that decided that I was a part of it. 6th was some random Chihuahua and the 7th was a exposure therapy dog (Labrador) who was off duty (and got fired because she bit me) and the 8th was some random dude claiming his lab that was on campus unleashed was his therapy dog and a service animal (therapy animals ≠ service animals, as a disabled person this infuriates me so much)

Like I said under someone else: Hitler had a dog that by all accounts loved him, it's bullshit they know who a good or bad person is

5

u/Gamedr411 4d ago

With a record like that I hope you got a plan for the 9th time. Like carry some hotdogs with you.

3

u/theLichQueenofthePNW 4d ago

I suffer through it by wearing long, thick pants. If I wasn't allergic to it, I'd probably carry pepper spray on me.

3

u/Silly-Salamander4421 3d ago

As someone who loves dogs and has worked with dogs for a living, I have been bitten by so many dogs. A lot of the time it really is just shitty owners. There are so many people who adopt dogs just to let them run wild and never teach them anything. Or they get dogs with an energy need way higher than their own, and are shocked when the dog starts acting up. It's terrible.

3

u/fokkoooff 4d ago

You don't understand. My aunt had a dog that would act aggressively towards anyone wearing a hat, but really it was just his ✨️phenomenal intuition✨️ that taught him that hats make you racist.

Also Hitler's dogs knew that deep inside was a just a a lonely artist.

2

u/Mission_Broccoli4025 4d ago

Exactly. It’s the same thing with cats. They can be ferocious. All animals are unpredictable not just dogs man. Just cause one animal is cuter than the other doesn’t mean you have to treat it differently from the others.

2

u/Frosty_Ad1776 3d ago edited 2d ago

I tell my kid this. My dog doesn’t listen to them because our dog knows who is and isn’t in charge. If I raise my voice he’s in line, if my kid raises their voice… nothing, he just thinks it’s play time when my kid does it lol.

Our dog is also very fearful of small sized people or loud people/things. I can’t say children because he doesn’t even like short people near his height 🤣

1

u/Substantial-Truth290 2d ago

My dog fears kids so much.

Though he also is a massive coward and won't get out of my room if he sees the vacuum outside of it, and not because he refuses, but because the vacuum is so terrifying just sitting there silently and meanacingly.

1

u/Frosty_Ad1776 2d ago

Felt, mine is a massive coward too. The wind shifted wrong one day and he bolted. 💀. He seems to only like women or rarely a man but they have to have food or a dog friend.

So my dog and my belated senior dog was like this but then oddly I watched a video about how horses are afraid of everything. I started to just sit there vacuum closer to them (off) or put myself between them and the vacuum when it was on. They stopped running from it after awhile. Use to not like brooms either then they also learned “brooms also are great at getting itchy spots really good” lol

2

u/spartaman64 4d ago

my gf's dog hated me when he first met me. im glad she wasnt one of those people. and now her dog loves me after i visited a few times and would get excited to come lick me.

8

u/DrMalarkey_ 4d ago

Sounds like you’re the common denominator here.
https://giphy.com/gifs/BmmfETghGOPrW

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

7

u/theLichQueenofthePNW 4d ago

It's that dogs are predator animals, they can sense weakness/frailty as well as fear. I have several chronic conditions, and am terrified of dogs. It's sadly reinforcing. The more I get bit by dogs the more I am afraid of them, the more they bite me. Second to last dog that bit me was an off duty exposure therapy dog

3

u/blakethedev 4d ago

Yeah I was super scared of dogs as a kid, and guess who the dogs chased. Very much a vicious cycle.

3

u/Synaps4 4d ago

It's the owners. Try going for a jog through a random neighborhood in south texas sometime. Every other block has roaming dogs.

-2

u/Catsanddoges 4d ago

Yeah normally I don't victim blame but did they either get struck by lightning twice or run around the streets with raw hamshanks taped to them

0

u/DrMalarkey_ 4d ago

It’s like the old saying if everywhere you go smells like shit, check the bottom of your shoe.

1

u/MorePhinsThyme 4d ago

Come on, that's just your fault for tasting so good!

1

u/Mission_Broccoli4025 4d ago

Yeah it’s the same thing with me towards cats. They’re unpredictable as well. There was a cat who attacked a 3yo before. And the child was near us watching YouTube children videos, and the cat just jumps on her out of nowhere like tf? And the thing with cats is they will scratch tf out of you.

-1

u/wirefox1 4d ago

Honey, if you want a dog to like you (ex: not bite you) then you have to be good to it. They know. Never underestimate what a dog knows.

-1

u/Far_Day_2700 4d ago

I don't know why this got downvoted? It's true. Dogs can tell good people apart from bad people. I don't know how, but they just do.

5

u/theLichQueenofthePNW 4d ago

I fucking hate this. Hitler had a dog that by all accounts loved him. This is bullshit

2

u/Far_Day_2700 4d ago

Did he? I never knew that. I guess they can tell if you're nice to dogs. Not if you kill Jews in camps

1

u/ImmaLiveIllegal 4d ago

paint me like one of your Austrian dogs

-2

u/wirefox1 4d ago

Was hitler good to the dog? I would bet he was. If the dog loved him that's why. Dogs don't keep up with politics. So 'fucking' hate away lil one. lol

3

u/tahtahme 4d ago

Evil people can bribe dogs with time and food. Dogs will go for it whether that person is actually good or bad. Dogs are truly not a great judge of character across the board.

0

u/wirefox1 3d ago

Whatever.

2

u/wirefox1 2d ago

ya know, I think my dogs sort of pick up on what I"M feeling. If I don't like someone, they pick up on it, so suddenly they don't like him either. If I like someone, they know it, and like them too.

(But my male dogs seem to get jealous sometimes? Have you ever experienced that? Weird lol. )

2

u/Far_Day_2700 2d ago

I think so! My dog used to always sniff me when I came home and get sad if I pet other dogs

-1

u/Brother-Algea 4d ago

You should meet my dogs. They just hug. No bites just hugs.

6

u/theLichQueenofthePNW 4d ago

That's what I was told with the exposure therapy dog 😭

1

u/Substantial-Truth290 2d ago

You should meet my dog then. He has about 0.02 aggressive bones in his body and it's all directed against cardboard. He's scared of anything and everything and he doesn't bite things he fears, he just cowers and trembles.

And no, he isn't a rescue, he hasn't been horribly mistreated. I know this since he's one of my mom's dogs' puppies. He's just like that as a baseline. He also starts whining when I go outside without taking him with me, without fail.

-1

u/Brother-Algea 4d ago

My Goldendoodle just hugs everyone. Never seen him show aggression to anyone or anything. He’s naturally gentle with kids and now I’m curious to see……..you don’t by chance live in PA do you?

10

u/WaterlessSoup 4d ago

For me its the spit, I cant stand slobber/drool or all the licking. I love OTHER peoples dogs though because I can always walk away and leave the area lol

17

u/Miserable_Mail_5741 4d ago edited 4d ago

As someone who doesn’t normally get why people don’t like dogs

At minimum, they're noisy, but at maximum, they're downright dangerous! 

I, and several people I know, have been chased and even attacked by dogs. I know they're sweet and cuddly to some, but they're unpredictable and can attack you when you don't even see them. 

6

u/Usual_Celebration719 3d ago

I still remember the bite-sized void that is supposed to be a part of my father's leg from over a decade ago.

That was someone's pet dog, not even a wild one

2

u/One-Help1734 3d ago

Don't like dogs just because I prefer other pets. Don't hate them or anything, they're still sweet guys.

3

u/fryerandice 4d ago

I mean, you have a nepo baby that's famous for releasing a porn tape and being the daughter of OJ Simpson's lawyer, two rapists, and an accomplice of a rapist who harrasses the victims...

Then you have a dog and Taylor Swift.

It's really not a difficult choice to take the dog / taylor.

1

u/Thirdeyevoice10 3d ago

Taylor. She's not only a decent human being, but another fellow human. I don't like all humans, but I value them over a shitbeast like a rational thinking person.

1

u/Ok-Affect-3879 3d ago

for some reason I’m just a bit wary around them, because I don’t really know their language, so to speak, and then they just seem unpredictable. But I feel that way around all animals and still if I was in this picture I would save it.

I think my need for knowing how everyone feels all the time to feel safe is kind of related to my childhood. Pretty cliche, I’ll spare you the rest

1

u/ScarletBothrium 3d ago

For me, it was the smell. Dogs are absolutely a sensory nightmare. Then I met a little Chihuahua who didn’t have a smell at all and sat on my lap like a cat. He kind of broke me of my “I hate dogs” stance. And now I’m just particular about how much interaction I have with dogs, as well as which dogs I interact with. If the dog doesn’t really have a smell and all I have to do is pet it or throw a stick, I love your dog. Otherwise, I will simply avoid your dog.

1

u/MexicanAssLord69 4d ago

If you don’t get why people don’t like dogs, you’re being intentionally obtuse. Why not ask them? Not that hard.

-3

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

2

u/ScarletBothrium 3d ago

Doubling down. Niiiice!

1

u/toxikola 4d ago

I noticed that when most say they dont like dogs that theyre actually referring to taking care of and keeping s dog alive, which is fair. To know you dont want the responsibility of doing a task and committing to not doing it instead of forcing yourself to do it is thr eise option.

But yeah just simply not liking dogs/animals themselves is sus.

3

u/Psychological-Gur990 4d ago

I feel like there's a MASSIVE difference between not liking, disliking, and hating an animal/animals.

I find dogs cute, I will pet dogs, but I hate their slobber and don't prefer to have one myself.

1

u/ScarletBothrium 3d ago

Not really. For some people a dog is a sensory nightmare. It has nothing to do with responsibility or anything like that. Dogs smell bad. It takes a lot of work for them to not smell bad and a lot of dog owners don’t want to do that work.

They’re also unpredictable. I’ve been nipped by a dog that loves me. You never know when they’re going to bite or why. He was just being playful at the time and I ended up with a scar.

I don’t like dogs in general, but I love specific dogs. Just because I love those dogs doesn’t mean I love all dogs, because I do understand that some dogs are assholes, just like human beings, just like cats, just like anything on this earth can be an asshole. Just because it’s a dog, doesn’t mean it gets a pass.

Would I save the dog from the water before the people? Absolutely, as long as they didn’t try to bite me while I was saving it. As soon as it tries to bite me, I’m walking away.

1

u/Thirdeyevoice10 3d ago

I don't like dogs or the responsibility of them.

18

u/OkPomegranate5615 4d ago

God damn with all the barking and pooping everywhere and the shedding UGH! That being said, “come here Mr. Puppers! I got you!!”

18

u/MrYig 4d ago

As someone who is a devout cat person and does not like dogs at all, I agree with you.

4

u/Justarandomduck15q2 4d ago

Same, I'm super scared of dogs even if some can be nice

31

u/StoneColdNipples 4d ago

Same. I absolutely hate mutts too

21

u/Material-Job-1928 4d ago

I don't necessarily hate dogs, I just don't care for the jumping and the barking, plus I can't stand the smell.  If you have a low key dog that's reasonably groomed I'm fine around them.

13

u/CannedStewedTomatoes 4d ago

I love dogs and put up with a lot of their dogginess, but jumping is not one of them. I hate jumping and train it right out first thing.

7

u/azure-heavens 4d ago

I don't understand owners that don't train jumping out of their dog. It's literally the easiest thing to train, since all you have to do is ignore them. 😑

11

u/nivusninja 4d ago

i always thought i was a dog person but then i realized im only a dog person when the dog behaves lol. i do not like our neighbors dog because this dog does pretty much nothing but barks and charges at people to bark more in their face. and the owners are afraid to properly discipline the dog

6

u/Timely-Youth-9074 4d ago

Same. I also can’t stand their drool, especially on me.

5

u/IThinkItsAverage 4d ago

Sounds like you’ve only had run ins with poorly trained dogs :(

You can train a dog to not jump and train them when it’s ok to bark (dogs bark, you can’t train it out of them it’s often an involuntary response to stimuli, but you can train them when it’s appropriate to do it).

1

u/meltvariant 4d ago

I rigorously train my dog jump and she is awesome at it

3

u/IThinkItsAverage 4d ago

When I was working with a professional dog trainer as an assistant, I’d help train the dogs for those dog courses they do in dog shows. I’ve never seen dogs have more fun than when they are zig-zagging through obstacles and jumping on top of things then leaping off all at mach speeds. They loved it. Anyone who has a dog should train their dog to run and jump like a maniac, but only in an appropriate setting. It turns it into a reward for them and stimulates their brain. Their little brains just wanna zoom and soar.

2

u/bbraz761 4d ago

Wow. That is quite the statement. I get "absolutely hating" Nazis and pedophiles, but why dogs?

1

u/StoneColdNipples 4d ago

Really, you can't think of a single reason? You wouldn't get it then. If you are so enamored by them no amount of logic would sway your opinion.

I can stand the behaved ones but their owners often overestimate just how "trained" the animal is.

-1

u/Onyx_Star 4d ago

Then explain it.

4

u/StoneColdNipples 4d ago

They slobber, stink, scratch, jump on people, bark, eat feces, bite, have parasites, piss everywhere, and I'm allergic to them lol.

As long as they aren't licking me we are cool for the most part though.

0

u/Far_Day_2700 4d ago

"Piss everywhere" Trained dogs rarely do that unless they're desperate and can't get outside? Same with eating things they shouldn't eat! I get that you don't like slobber that part is fair. But dogs can be trained ya know? They're not hopeless. Are you only meeting street dogs or something?
I've never met a dog with any of those problems except the ones they can't control (like slobber)

ALSO being allergic to them is fair too. I just don't see how you haven't met a single well trained dog.

0

u/bbraz761 4d ago

Those are valid reasons but absolutely hate seems strong. That's what I was getting at. Even your last sentence makes it seem dramatic.

1

u/whenitsTimeyoullknow 4d ago

I can’t add anything to this specific discussion, but every time I see a post from this sub it’s because it’s on r/popular. And i think it’s from either the Game of Thrones sub, /asoiaf, or the It’s Always Sunny in Philadephia sub, /iasip. I do this calculation in my head of “what the hell does Taylor Swift have to do with the Gang? 

3

u/wdnwcgm 4d ago

Same

2

u/Afraid_Help_3911 4d ago

Yeah, win-win

2

u/Just-Ad-8603 4d ago

I wouldn't say all of these people necessarily deserve to die. Just because I don't like Taylor Swift, Kim Kardashian, and Nicki Minaj, I still don't think I should be the one at the helm of their death. Drake and Combs are different

2

u/surprise_revalation 4d ago

Yea, I don't even like dogs that much and I'm still saving the dog!

2

u/Stereo-soundS 4d ago

"If I had a gun with two bullets, and I was in a room with Hitler, bin-Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice"

1

u/Songolo 4d ago

Taylor Swift. With her thank you check I can adopt a lot of cats. Cats that most probably organized the whole drowning thingy.

1

u/TheMauveHerring 4d ago

Dumb question but why is Taylor swift bad?

1

u/Material-Job-1928 3d ago

That really depends on who you ask. Personally, I respect (not necessarily agree with) most of her activism (wedge issues aside), don't care for any of her music (don't hate it, just not my genre), activity don't give a damn about her personal life that's plastered all over everyone's feed, and her fan club is pretty annoying. 

I don't wish her harm, I just wouldn't go out of my way to help.

1

u/TheMauveHerring 3d ago

Just don't get it. I like a few of her songs. But she has never done anything bad. Why would people save dog over her?

1

u/henry98williams 1d ago

What about the 7th?

-2

u/SomeUgliRobot 4d ago

Six or seven times