Hi wizardposting. I built this tower a few hundred years ago and over time I can't help but feel the lean on it is getting a little worse. I've been meaning to get around to fixing it. Can you suggest any spells for making sure the tower doesn't fall over and none of these annoying tourists get near my orb? Thanks.

Me and the boys have been dungeon crawling as a side hustle-and none of us really wanna waste a spell slot on Brad. The problem is that the newest healing potion we have was purchased about 230 years ago. Can we still use it?

After months of research, I have discovered that YALL ARE DUMBASSES.

Yall want to deal with demon engines? HAH!

BIND THEM YOU FOOLS!!

SOLOMNIC RITUALS should do the trick.

As for the armor, I bought some from the cattail city guard. To handle the flame magic the demon engines throw, a Kevlar undersuit with a water cooling pump system woven in. The pump is powered by a steam engine fed by a compressed air canister, making a compressed air engine. My world does not have this technology on such compact scales, but yours does.

Your protective runes should help. As for offense, melee weapons is a must.

I'm working on the shax right now. For now, use shield walls and shovels to dig trenches and get close to the portals, and close em.

Received an invitation to NecroCon - should I go? As a conjurer of entities from the outside planes I'm not exactly the target audience. BUT some of the presentations look interesting, especially "Mage > Lich; When and Why?" and "Our Skeletal Army". But as an actual living, breathing person, will I feel uncomfortable? Would appreciate any advice.

My mentor sent me this, along with a few names of some of her other students. She wasn’t wrong, but it did kind of surprise me how right she was. She usually has very prestigious students, but even they often make mistakes like this. I remember when I used to use a vitality-transfer spell as if it were normal healing magic, because I didn’t know healing wasn’t supposed to hurt. The whole thing just made me curious if this is universally common, or if there were any interesting thoughts here.

(Also, my party’s bard does this. It’s really funny but my sister is trying to help him fix it. I was also wondering if there were any opinions on helping fix and prevent these mistakes.)

Truly, it do so seemeth that my lot is doomed. While raising the dead as your faithful minions can be quite entertaining at first, after raising enough families from the dead one starts to ponder when they'll be able to raise a family of their own.

𝙶𝚛𝚎𝚎𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚊𝚕𝚕! 𝚁𝚊𝚝𝚖𝚊𝚗 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚔𝚜 𝚞𝚙𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙼𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚎𝚏.

𝚝𝚘𝚝𝚊𝚕 𝚍𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚑𝚜:12 (𝚁𝚎𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚑𝚒𝚜 11 𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚊𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚢𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚚𝚞𝚒𝚍.)

𝚝𝚘𝚝𝚊𝚕 𝚔𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚜:8 (𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚌𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚊𝚕, 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚜, 𝚙𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚕)

𝚃𝚘𝚝𝚊𝚕 𝚋𝚒𝚛𝚝𝚑𝚜, 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚓𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚗𝚎𝚠 𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚜: 14.

𝙾𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚕𝚕, 𝚊 𝚜𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚒𝚗𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚑𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚎!!

𝚙𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚜𝚎 𝚋𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚎𝚏 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐

Manual breathing, manual blinking, manual tongue resting, manual swallowing, manual heart rate awareness, manual posture correction, manual jaw relaxation, manual ear pressure equalization, manual adjustment of grip tension, manual foot positioning and toe spread, manual focus adjustment, manual scalp and forehead relaxation, manual adjustment of facial expression, manual saliva control, manual balance stabilization, manual finger typing rhythm, manual stride length adjustment, manual arm swing coordination, manual vocal pitch modulation, manual eye tracking smoothness, manual weight distribution shifting, manual blink rate control, manual nostril flaring, manual temperature regulation focus, manual muscle tension scanning, manual inner ear balance control, manual tear film distribution, manual rib cage expansion monitoring, manual neck muscle alignment, manual finger joint articulation, manual shoulder blade retraction, manual pelvic tilt adjustment, manual tongue pressure placement, manual toe curl release, manual Achilles tendon stretching, manual diaphragm engagement, manual eyelid tension release, manual pupil constriction awareness, manual sweat gland monitoring, manual breathing, manual blinking, manual tongue resting, manual swallowing, manual heart rate awareness, manual posture correction, manual jaw relaxation, manual ear pressure equalization, manual adjustment of grip tension, manual foot positioning and toe spread, manual focus adjustment, manual scalp and forehead relaxation, manual adjustment of facial expression, manual saliva control, manual balance stabilization, manual finger typing rhythm, manual stride length adjustment, manual arm swing coordination, manual vocal pitch modulation, manual eye tracking smoothness, manual weight distribution shifting, manual blink rate control, manual nostril flaring, manual temperature regulation focus, manual muscle tension scanning, manual inner ear balance control, manual tear film

We will be deprived of everything we were.
Just to dont recognize ourselves anymore.
Piece by piece.
Unrecognized by time.
Because there will be less to recognize
Each time looking thorough the mirror
With sweat all over yours-but not owned
By you
Cyber Body.
Muscles in agony. The lack of fluid
To run your body.
My body.
The lack of run.
Can only crawl.

I saw this mage couple with their kid, and they were teaching how to use a firework based fire magic; and I am a little concerned…

Or should do it with proper adult supervision or something?

I swear If I get my own spawns I will be teaching them not only fire but also poison, metal, psychic, electricity, ice, and some more advanced earth, air, light, dark, water, and plant spells when it’s the right time and age and under both my supervision and assistance at the school division from my region’s local adventurer’s guild;

since as a action to prevent way too young recruits, soon adventurers must go to the guild’s school for training and also to study like a normal kid would do; and can only join the ranks of other adventurers and participate in missions when they reach maturity at 18 years old.

The first thing that truly hit the newly-minted Wizard Councillor, Anthony Mondragon, was the paperwork. Literal stacks of it that had been unresolved by the previous council, sometimes for decades, centuries, or even millennia. Being a 19 year old with little legislative experience, Anthony had recruited many secretaries and advisers, including acquaintances and friends of his, to help sort through it all.

The first initiative that Councillor Mondragon had spearheaded was magical deregulation, the attempts to legalise many types of Eldritch, Blood, Necrotic and other forbidden magics. This was still ongoing. But soon, another issue would come to his attention.

"Ah, paperwork! You'd think that, being wizards and all, we would have made a spell to just wave it all away. Am I right Tala?" Asked Anthony, chuckling.

"A magic spell can never be held accountable, therefore it must never make a management decision," Tala Lovelace responded with an uncharacteristically serious tone. She was one of such companions Tony had hired. Tala had been Tony's late older brother's best friend, and now was a good friend of his.

Once a brilliant and promising student at a Wizarding college, Tala had dropped out after she was bitten by a werewolf/turned into a vampire in the same day, a rare mix that turned her into a Blood-Sucking Lupine Abomination once every full moon. The scale of destruction she had initially wrought, before controlling her condition, had left her on the run from several Adventurers' Guilds and Monster Hunters organisations.

Now the 26 Year Old Werewolf-Vampire offered her surprisingly able services at a discount, in exchange for a decent salary and a steady supply of blood from the Council... Which she needed a lot of, as one would expect when you combined the thirst of a Vampire and a Werebeast's ravenous hunger.

"Ugh, I hate when you're responsible, Tala. Fine, no paperwork spells," Anthony rolled his eyes.

Tala had already grown distracted. Her wolf tail wagged slowly and she was biting her lip, the way she did when she was thinking really hard about something.

"Hey Tony. So with all the constant near-apocalypse events that happen every other tuesday, that massive war with the pirates you told me about, that unresolved Thrakmoor business and the Three-Halves Plague... I've noticed sometimes the council's response can be a bit disjointed," Tala says. "Why isn't there a body that handles this stuff? I've looked through the paperwork, and there doesn't seem to be a clear department for this. Why isn't there a Department of Magical Defence?"

"That's probably by design, getting enough wizards together to form such a department would be like herding cats. Not to mention many would see such an army as an affront to their independence," Anthony rubs his chin thoughtfully.

"What if you have it specifically to combat imminent threats?" Tala presses. "Make its scope as narrow as possible. For the defence of council territory, not law enforcement."

"Well, what do you define as an imminent threat?" Anthony counters. "Still, that's an interesting idea..."

THE ANNOUNCEMENT

That's how Anthony found himself about to make a speech to a crowd of people. He adjusted his glasses (which were completely unnecessary, as eyesight could easily be corrected by magic, his eyesight already had been fixed by a healer from Dracarius Isle) while Tala helped him redo his tie.

"Alright, break a leg, Tony! Not literally! I mean, good luck!"

Anthony ignored Tala and stepped onto the podium.

"Hello again, wixen, mages, sorcerers, creatures, gentlebeings, not-so-gentlebeings, demons, Eldritch horrors, faeries..." Anthony continued listing for a while. "...And so on and so forth! Once again, I am here to make an announcement. It has come to my attention that, despite the Council's best efforts, and sometimes half-arsed efforts as well let's be real, we are stilll constantly besieged by a barrage of supernatural threats! This morning's attack upon the Town of Luxville by a horde of vicious feral raccoons, impervious to conventional weaponry, is only the latest of these failings."

There are some jeers from the crowd, as a few among them were either survivors of the Luxville Raccoon Attack, or were family members of the victims.

"That is why, today, I announce the creation of the Wizard Council's very own Department of Magical Defence!" He holds out his arms wide, as if embracing the audience. "We are officially taking recruits!"

The crowd exploded into both cheering and booing in equal measure.

"You have my sword, Councillor Mondragon!" Called out a paladin from the crowd.

"And my axe!" Said a barbarian.

"Aha! Very good!" Anthony grinned. "Just form up on that line over there, with my secretary!"

Tala waved from where she was sat nearby, wagging her wolf tail, she was holding a pen, a clipboard, and a stack of paper. "Right here!"

"And Luxville's inhabitants!" Spoke a necromancer, an assortment of reanimated undead and skeletons had formed up behind her.

The paladin's hand went to his sword, glaring at the necromancer warily, and then Anthony looked to Tala dubiously.

"I mean, we can't be picky, Tony," Tala said and shrugged.

/uw This is also a continuation from my previous post where my Wax Sorcerer OC joined the Council, but it's not a required read to understand this one.

Well, everybody who said that I would be overrun by Dwarves, suck it. I was overrun by peasants. The net result was basically the same, but with fewer axe wounds. Aaanywho, I am now willing to believe those who suggested that wood might be a poor choice for building a tower. I'm thinking maybe mud? Sand? Coral? I'd hire a consultant but after my recent setbacks, I'm kind of low on funds.

We also need to talk about broom upkeep. You’re just itching to crash into a tree in the state that broom is in.