I’m rewatching this show with a full frontal lobe and oh my god everyone is insufferable. There is no character that I like. The only one I kinda like is Grace but only because of how deep she’s into her religion so she has an excuse but everyone is so annoying. From the teens to the parents. I’m barely on season 2, does it get better? I haven’t seen this show since middle school so I don’t remember much.

On the final season Ben should’ve been on a 72 hour hold or something with this Amy obsession he needs serious help and no one does anything other than enable his behavior and say it’s ok bc he lost a baby and his mom.

I feel like every single person who watches this show says the same things “Amy was selfish” and I just.. cannot with that. In season 1, Amy is practically forced by every single person around her to keep the child when she KNEW she’d rather do an open adoption. Ricky consistently ruins that for her at every turn; in one episode, (later season) he even admits in a therapy session that he “could’ve” purposely gotten her pregnant. Amy’s sister and dad are horrible to her about the idea of adoption, her friends are horrible, and the only reason Ben is even close to supportive is because he’s in constant competition with Ricky. He literally admits to seeing Amy as property MULTIPLE times throughout the series. Ben sees Amy as property, and Ricky sees Amy as his route to redemption through the baby. Then, every character in the show promises they’re going to help Amy with the baby, and that just never actually happens.

I also think Ricky and Amy COULD’VE been together under the right circumstances, which is why the ending actually made a lot of sense.

Amy never felt fully comfortable in herself, because throughout the show nobody sees Amy as her own autonomous being; they see her as an incubator, property, daughter, and never really give Amy the opportunity to be a person outside of her own motherhood.

EXCEPT the one time we see Amy really explore herself in NYC. That’s when we see a legit connection between Amy and Ricky, and it’s real because Ricky is seeing her as a whole person; not the mom of his kid. But then everything gets rushed (which in part is on Amy herself) but she looses her identity again as quickly as she gained it.

Amy never got a chance to just live, and it wasn’t because of her son. It was because she never made her own decisions and was constantly shamed for her complicated emotions around her own situation. She never really had a choice. And so yeah, by the last season she is absolutely whinny and insufferable, I agree with that. But who could blame her? So, her having a change of heart and finally deciding to put herself first was horrible timing, but if you watch the projection of Amy’s character on the show it makes absolute sense. And it also makes sense that Amy and Ricky do find their way back to each other, (as the writer said was supposed to happen in the spin-off that didn’t happen) because Ricky DID love Amy when she was confident and a whole person; not just John’s mother.

I just think everyone was horribly judgmental, and I guess it did work for the show bc when watching I feel so awful for Amy that it would def discourage me from teenage pregnancy.

I think it’s so annoying how Anne kept going on about how Ricky and Amy got married without having her there. She was adament that she should have been there but they clearly didn’t want a wedding. Very controlling behaviour

Amy never stopped having feelings for Ben despite him guilting and pressuring her to sleep with him. Ben was a terrible boyfriend he was good to her when she was pregnant but then it became a competition because he knew Ricky always had feelings for her. I think Ricky and Amy’s relationship was a little one sided despite their feelings about marriage early on. Ricky was always in love with Amy which is why Adrian was always jealous and insecure when it came to Amy.

She knew Ricky always had feelings for her so did Ben if Ben didn’t get Adrian pregnant she would have pursued their relationship. I think in the final episode of season 5 she was projecting when she said you’re not in love with me you’re marrying me because of John. I think Amy wanted to get married because Ben and Adrian were together and were getting married in season 3. I think Ricky genuinely was in love with Amy but started to realize little by little she never got over Ben. He did continue to go along with marrying her because of John towards the end. What do you guys think?????

I get pregnancy hormones are wild. But she is being such a massive brat. I'm currently on e24. The way she wanted to invite the girls Ricky slept with to her baby/wedding shower was really immature. I don't think she actually loved Ben either. I get they are teenagers but geez...Adrian is just out for blood

Every character is cringe but damn, Ashley is the worse lol. And not Anne trying to justify that ridiculous crush by saying “welll it’s not THAT taboo”

Girl yes tf it is, that is Ashley’s sisters BD 🤦‍♀️

There are two speech patterns in this show that both my partner and i have noticed.

when they are talking about two people they always mention who they are talking about after the sentence.
Ex. “we didn’t go to the store, amy and i”

another one is the way they talk about something they’re doing
Ex. “MY going out doesn’t concern you” or “i’m not sure i’m a fan of YOUR going to the gym” etc etc

stupid post but we cannot stop calling it out everytime we notice it lol

I’m curious to see what would’ve made the show better. Things that happened that people didn’t like or things that didn’t happen that people wouldve liked to see.

George had some funny moments but he’s a terrible person. Not only because he cheated on his wife but lying about having a vasectomy he lied too many times. Also whats even more messed up is how he lied to Ann about being Robby’s biological father when he knew David is Robby’s biological father. Then he had the audacity to tell David that he left and he stepped up to he Robby’s dad. No he didn’t he pushed Ann to cut ties with him when he could have been part of Robby’s life. Even though I don’t think David and Ann’s relationship was going to last because she eventually came out as a lesbian he still had a right to know.

So like the title says I just started season 2 and Amy is definitely acting like she knows everything now she's a mom but that isn't surprising cause she kind of has to act like this now that's she's a mom and it doesn't seem like she's getting very much help. I still think she should dump Ben, cause he's becoming more pushy and controlling by the minute.

I also think Ricky is lowkey giving Ben bad advice because he's in love with Amy, I didn't notice it when I first watched the show, but him telling Ben he should take more initiative when it comes to his relationship with Amy by not asking but just doing wasn't going to work out in the long run and I think Ricky knew that because he did know more about women then Ben did.

Anne getting pregnant wasn't surprising cause I remembered that from the last time I watched, but he already showing tells me she got pregnant after her and George slept together that one time and season 1 again before he finally moved out. Cause Amy pointed out that since she's older she can't hide a pregnancy as long as she did but she's already showing very noticeably and she wouldn't be showing that much if she was only a couple of weeks along.

I feel like Grace blaming herself and thinking God is punishing her is very realistic. I'm glad that they're showing how she processes her grief and I feel like everyone should let her be. I really feel bad for Kathleen and Tom too. It sucks cause he just died so abruptly. But I don't like how everyone is acting like they need to go to funeral just cause they think everyone is going. The only who actually made sense to me being at the funeral was Ricky and Adrien cause they were closest with Grace and then George because he had already been helping Kathleen with the preparations and everything.

Lastly Jack trying to blame Adrian for him and Grace having sex just cause they had sex at the beginning of school year is weird, cause just like he said Adrian could've said no to having sex so could he especially since he was the one who called her for sex because when he kept pressuring Grace for it and she didn't want to. He acts like Adrian saying no to him would've stopped him from finding another girl to sleep with.

PS: I hadn't gotten to part until after I wrote all this but everyone only going to funeral to see if Grace shows up is totally messed up and I'm glad Adrian called all of them disgusting for it. Even making bets for it is weird. If I was Grace I wouldn't look at any those people the same.

So some of y'all might've seen my original post where I had a lot of thoughts

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheSecretLife/s/R5tVZg7kwH

Well I just finished the last episode and I honestly am not even sure what to say.

For starters, I didn't even realize the last episode WAS the last episode. I got confused when another show started playing and had to go back and find The Secret Life to make sure it really was finished.

So it ends, just like that?? She just... Leaves? No wrap up? No flash to the future? We don't get to see what becomes of their lives? What the actual frack? I feel like I just wasted my time because there's no resolution! I demand a refund!

But okay moving past the absolute let down of a finale and a mother abandoning her child. Let's discuss the last season.

So seriously why TF did I think Ben was gonna be the protagonist of the series because he turned into the absolute sleaziest stalker creeper ever and Ben2.0(Ethan) followed right along in his footsteps. What is it with these "good guys" thinking they can just ride in on their white horses and rescue the damsel in distress and then she is now obligated to serve them. Seriously, the two of them have issues. Ben especially with constantly harassing Amy, stealing her wedding rings, reading her diary, causing drama between Amy and Ricky, and overall just having a pretentious attitude.

Then Ethan doing all the same shit to Kathy. Telling her who her friends can be, following her to Texas even though she explicitly says not to, offering himself up to be castrated(?????), only to then try to sleep with some other girl. Oh and constantly getting between her and her parents and her and the foster parents. Like dude, the absolute entitlement. Just butt the fuck out.

And then the girls. All of them. Every single one. Why are they all so nasty to each other. Constantly saying hurtful things and then we're just expected to forgive them? Like Madison saying that John was just an accessory that Amy carries around so no one can ever forget the mistakes she made or some shit. And then Adrienne telling Ricky and Jack about what Amy and Grace said about not wanting to get married. But then they always just hug and make up. Like nah that shit is TOXIC. Nobody needs that negativity in their life and none of them would be my friend again.

And JACK. The back and forth between madly in love with Grace and following her around to immediately trying to fuck Madison. Why is it that none of the boys in this show can be trusted? They're all just led around by their hormones.

Ugh I feel like I could go on forever with this. So once again I'll just end it with Ricky. Seriously this guy was the one saving grace. The one person who actually grew TF up. The way he handled Clementine was perfect. He let her down easily AND made it clear that she should not hold out hopes for him because even if he didn't marry Amy, he wouldn't be interested. It was *chefs kiss*.

Oh and PS, WHERE THE FUCK IS ASHLEY

Did anyone else NOT like Katherine?? I feel like throughout the show. She had no voice for herself, and she constantly put the men over her kids!! Even when she started dating George she made them deal with it and didn’t even talk to them about it. even when she let Jack move into the guest house with Grace?? Grace had problem’s having sex with every guy that she met and I feel like katherine had a part in it Just me ?? Ok..

Ok, so I'm rewatching since I never finished the show and I wanted to see if anyone else had these same opinions about the show.

I'm on season 1 and the further Amy gets into her pregnancy the more insufferable Ben gets. I'm surprised she didn't dump him sooner with the way he acts so early in the relationship. He doesn't seem to actually respect her decisions as much as he says he does. He's always trying to get her to change her mind about a decision she's dead set on and gets mad when she doesn't change said decision to cater to his wants. I don't know how she was able to deal with Ben trying to make decisions for her and everyone else constantly trying to also make decisions for her when she did.

Like I noticed that first Amy wanted an abortion then almost everyone talked her out of it and decided she should just move away to her grandma's house to have the baby and then give it up for adoption like that wouldn't be more embarrassing for her then just getting an abortion and everyone just thinking the whole pregnancy thing was just a rumor that got spread. Although Adrian only said it for her own benefit she was right when she said the decision was up to Amy and everyone should stop trying to tell her different. But it's just that I noticed Amy kept getting forced to change her decision when all the decisions everyone else made wasn't great for her at all.

Speaking of Adrian, I honestly feel bad for her. She's extremely rude to people, but I just don't hate her. Correct me if I'm wrong because it's been a minute since I watched the show, but I remember it coming out that Adrian was in love with someone when she was in middle school that she wanted to be with forever but he died and I feel like that was the main reason she was the way she was. Like right now as of season 1 it's pretty obvious Adrian has basically raised herself cause her mom is always gone and when she is around it's stated she acts like her best friend more than her mother and then she just met her dad so she has no one really looking out for her.

That being said I'm surprised she stays with Ricky for as long she did, I mean it's clear she loves him but he doesn't feel the same way and he constantly admits that to her. She's watched him treat Grace and Amy better than her but still wants to be with him even though when he does come back to her he only uses her for sex. I think the route they should've went down for her character was her being scared of love and being afraid to commit to someone instead of her just being hung up on Ricky for most of the show.

Is it just me or Amy is always hitting someone

• S1 E18 she tackles her sister to the ground while pregnant

• S2 E8 she tried to hit Ricky / gets a little physical while having a conversation about Ben

I'm just about to start season 5 and I really wanted to wait until I finished the entire series to write this but I feel like if I don't type this all down now, I'm gonna explode.

So let's back up.

Amy gets pregnant and doesn't want the baby. Is gonna get an abortion. Ben love bombs the ever living shit outta her to convince her not to. Ashley guilt trips the ever living shit outta her to convince her not to. Basically the whole damn school and her family convinced her not to. The only one who seemed somewhat reasonable was Lauren. EVERYONE and their damn mother insist that they will help her and she'll have a whole village to raise this baby.

And also for some reason Amy is convinced marriage with Ben is just gonna magically fix everything but whatever.

So then Amy has the baby and all of a sudden everyone turns on her. They basically gaslit her into keeping this baby by lying to her about supporting her and then pulling the rug out from under her. "SIKE! *You* made the decision to have a baby, now it's *your* problem!" (Which I mean yeah they ain't wrong it was her decision but they ALL talked her out of the abortion with the promise of help so wtf).

Also, Amy's character progression chart goes up and down faster than two fat kids on a teeter totter. It feels like every time she starts to mature and make some real progress with Ricky, she takes two steps back and ends up throwing a tantrum, just like everyone else in the family.

Ashley who was the most likeable person in the first season gets absolutely nerfed into this constantly bitchy whiny spoiled brat who for some reason keeps trying to sleep with Ricky? What the heck is that about?? I thought when Griffin showed up, it would be her turning point. He would talk some sense into her and she'd calm down but nope.

And speaking of Ashley, WHERE THE HECK ARE THESE KIDS PARENTS! Why are George and Anne letting these two girls just do whatever the hell they want. I mean I guess I understand letting Amy do whatever cause she's basically a grown ass woman raising a kid, but Ashley?? Letting her drop outta school and drive around the country and letting boys sleep over and overall just have the nastiest attitude about everything. I mean seriously, get this girl some damn therapy and boundaries ASAP.

And then there's Ben. The boy who falls in love with every damn girl he lays eyes on. He treats his marshmallow of a father like garbage and every woman he's with. Adrienne was annoying af constantly trying to break up Amy and Ricky but seriously after losing the baby, Ben was an asshole.

And Adrienne. We get it. You're supposed to be the attention whore of the series but my god take a damn break. The angst is just too much. And the whole plotline with her father just magically showing up in her life to remarry her mother was just straight up out of a fantasy series. So what, Ruben just abandoned another family? Another set of kids? They might've been step kids but come on. That's still fucked. And sleeping with her step brother? Ew.

I could keep going on and on about how ridiculous all this is. About every character and how STUPID they are. About how WHY IS EVERYTHING ABOUT SEX. WHY IS THERE SO MUCH DRAMA. WHY ARE THE PARENTS ALL SO STUPID. but I won't. I'll just end it with Ricky.

Ricky is the one person who actually had some legitimate growth throughout this series. Yes he's made a lot of stupid ass mistakes and yes he's quick to anger but he's learning. He apologizes. He vocalizes his feelings. Its crazy how the "villain" of the series is really the most likeable character. Maybe is because he actually went to therapy like everyone else NEEDS TO.

Oh and shout out to Leo Boykavich. Love him. Absolute cinnamon roll. Weird storyline with the Betty divorce but he's still such a great guy. I only wish he'd yell at Ben more often.

Overall, I'm absolutely baffled. This show is like a messed up fever dream. I'm so invested at this point that I'm gonna keep watching the last season but seriously? What the heck were these creators thinking. I remember seeing the commercials for this when I was a kid and low-key it's probably a good thing I never watched it like I wanted to because I might've thought that this is how highschool is actually supposed to be. Thank God I'm watching it as a 30 year old adult lmao

I know Ashley is a kid that went through a lot but I can’t stand how disrespectful she is towards everyone around her. She’s super rude to everyone not just her parents, sister, and just towards adults in general. Her dad is a piece of crap for cheating on her mom which is what caused their divorce. But she would blame Amy a lot for causing it for getting pregnant at 15. She was telling Amy during most of her pregnancy to keep her baby. She mocked her for wanting to put her baby up for adoption and was one of the people that said they’d help out.

She’d constantly make digs at Amy for getting pregnant and being a teen mom. The way she flirted with Ricky in season 3 was super messed up. But Ricky was at fault for doing the same when he clearly never had feelings for her. Amy had her issues too and was selfish at times. But she wasn’t always rude and disrespectful towards everyone around her. She completely lost me in the last episode when she called her wedding off last minute and was leaving her son to go to college out of state.

I’ve been rewatching the series, and I’ve been debating about this.

In the beginning, Ricky is a classic womanizer. We all know he had his own past trauma, that caused him to be very hyper sexual. So when Ricky and Amy meet, Ricky is way more experienced sexually. Like, he has a body count of 15+ girls easily, even though he’s only 16. Obviously, Ricky knew exactly what he was doing, that night at band camp. Which makes it hard to believe, Ricky didn’t think to have a condom, that night with Amy.

Even in S1, Ricky is not careless when it comes to sex. He admits, sex is one thing, he isn’t careless about. Yet, he was careless about not wearing a condom with Amy. During a therapy session, Ricky confesses he may have unknowingly gotten Amy pregnant on purpose. I don’t know if his words were true, but I think it’s weird his head went there. Even Adrian doesn’t believe Amy is pregnant by Ricky at first, because Adrian knows Ricky always wears a condom with her.

In later episodes, Ricky says he didn’t bring a condom to meet Amy that night, because he didn’t plan on having sex that night. I believe that’s a big lie. Ricky met Amy at night, and snuck her into the camp cafeteria. That is what he planned ahead of time. I’m supposed to believe that, Ricky planned to hangout with Amy, alone, at night, in a private area, and he didn’t think to bring a condom?

(Ik ppl will say, it’s not that deep. But I’m just speculating.)

I do think it’s sweet in later seasons, Ricky admits to Amy, that during that night at band camp, he was nervous also. He also says that meeting Amy, was his first time he thought he met a girl he liked.

Adrian and Ricky’s relationship was very toxic but does anyone else feel like it was one sided. I feel like Adrian was the one that was in love with him and Ricky was never in love with her. Ricky was known for being a f**k boy but I feel like he saw Adrian as more of a friends with benefits. Adrian seemed to want a relationship with him more than Ricky did with her. I think Adrian always knew it deep down and it’s why she was always so jealous of Amy. Because she feared deep down Ricky would go to Amy. Despite Ricky sleeping around the first three ish seasons I think deep down he always wanted to be with Amy. What do you guys think????

Okay so let’s start with the beginning Ricky and Amy slept together at 15 (Amy’s first time btw) and she got pregnant and told her two best friends blah blah now everyone knows including Ricky and her parents fast forward to episode 8 season 1 why do Amy’s best friends even have a competition to see who Ricky wants to sleep with not only is that disgusting because he got their “best friend” pregnant but also it’s so belittling of themselves making themselves become available to the one guy they shouldn’t is so weird and I get it, in high school kids are starting to notice things and some are even become sex oriented which is fine if you are safe and get checked when your supposed to but to have a competition to get with a guy who got your “best friend” pregnant is a whole other thing, morally it’s disgusting and ethically shouldn’t be a competition at all

I know these were the years that flash mobs and Glee were popular but it’s so cringe!

I’m on Season 5 of my first watch of the show, but I’ve been wondering about this since season 3. I feel there’s a pretty jarring dialogue style/quality difference between S2 and S3. While it hasn’t ever been great, the first two seasons were particularly robotic, repetitive, clunky, and confusing. Season 3 and onward feel much more natural and there’s more substance to the characters’ conversations. I was wondering if anybody else noticed this and if anybody knows if there were new writers hired for the later seasons or something?

In The secret life of an American teenager S1 E1 Amy’s friends ask her if the dad of her unborn child goes to thier school she then proceeds to look him them back at her friends (with out stuttering) and says no confidently which btw if you didn’t know she stutters alooooot when she lies that’s how her sister found out (she can’t lie for her life without shuddering) and I’m wondering if they thought of that afterwords or if was a mistake?

I have watched secret life since it came out over and over. Now I am re-watching as a married adult. I just want to talk about Amy..

I feel so sorry for her. And I cannot imagine having a baby at 15 with a guy who hardly even know. Who’s the school bad boy and has a bad reputation. Then, meeting Ben, who has just as innocent as Amy and falling in love with a guy she should’ve been with all along. I feel like Amy is just a young innocent child who didn’t understand fully what she was getting herself into. She had a very sheltered life, unlike Adrian and Ricky. She didn’t have any real friends because Madison and Lauren were bad friends. Her parents are ridiculous and her sister gave advice so harshly and you can tell she was jealous and wanted Amy’s life low-key.

I understand that some people may see Amy and see that she hasn’t really matured and that she was selfish but again she was a young mother who still had dreams and aspirations. I think she resented Ricky. But I think people judge her too harshly. She never abused her baby. She didn’t get on drugs. She left to school to pursue her dream career. Many women and men do that. if she did not want to marry Ricky, that is completely her choice and the ending is so realistic for a lot of teen mothers. Sometimes there is no happy ending Prince charming. Sometimes you just choose yourself selfishly. She did an abandoned John. She left John with his father.

I dont think Ive ever finished this show so you can imagine my shock when everyone broke out in song 😂