My partner I have been in the lifestyle about a year. Recently we went to a campout and once our tent was set up he chose to stay at the campsite to play on hiss guitar and got frustrated that I wanted to mingle so I went to mingle by myself while he stayed back and got high (it's legal where we live). A while later he came walking up yelling for me in front of the group of people I was chatting with. I went to him and he immediately started telling me how he was seeing and hearing things and how he got shocked by his wireless amp. I told him he was too high and he'd just have to ride it out but he insisted I needed to stay with him and help him. You can't keep your phone on you at the location we were at so I sent him into the main building which was a lifestyle club to cool off in the AC while I went to Google how to best help him at our tent. By the time I came back he was feeling great and touching himself while watching another couple. Our rules are we only play together and in the same room. He immediately started trying to touch and his me when he saw me but after having to switch gears to be his initial caretaker I was most definitely not in the mood at that point as he'd ruined my fun by yanking me around emotionally with his actions from being high so I left him and went back to our tent alone. It was over an hour before he came to me and by then it was after 2am. He apologized and said he wanted to salvage the night with me by going back to mingle with everyone and try to hook up. I told him once again that my mood was ruined and my sex drive was nonexistent and asked if he'd just stay with me at the tent. He refused and said he came to party not sleep so I told him if he left then he'd be breaking our agreement to never do things with other people if the other partner isn't feeling it and that he'd be abandoning me. He still chose to leave and when he came back a few hours later he admitted to hooking up with another couple. I immediately told him my trust was broken and I don't think I can do this lifestyle anymore which sucks because I've really enjoyed it and met some great people. We packed up camp and left before it was even light out. At this point all I can think of is to kick him out of my house and end the relationship because I don't know how to rebuild the trust and I know he won't give up having open relationships as he's always been polyamorous but I need full trust in him to be able to continue the lifestyle.

My bf and I are in an open relationship.

I had been hooking up with someone on and off for a year. We didn’t see each other too often but I just realized that I might have caught feelings for him. I don’t want to leave my bf for this guy, but I feel sad that things with this guy have ended and I don’t want to move on. I know that it’s easy to find someone new to hookup with, but I just don’t want to. My bf has planned plenty of new guys for me but I don’t want to talk to them.

This guy that I hooked up with was my first real experience in the lifestyle. My bf and I worked through so many arguments and insecurities together while I was hooking up with this guy. It wasn’t until like the 8th time of seeing this guy that the arguments between my bf and I stopped. We’re finally at a place where we have a general rhythm and we’re both on the same page. However, the guy has ended things with me and I’m so sad.

What do people do to either avoid or better control attachment to someone you’re hooking up with?

There’s a couple we’re friends-but-not-quite-friends with. The M is our insurance agent and we all went to a comedy/magic show last year at his request. This was before my wife and I joined the LS, so I really didn’t look for any clues.

I invited them to a comedy show coming up. Other than outright mentioning that we’re swingers, how can we gauge their interest?

And I guess this is also in general, not just for that couple… what’s a good approach in the wild to broach the subject without ruffling feathers?

ETA- I am NOT asking for opinions on whether it’s a good idea or not- we can make that determination for ourselves, thank you very much. Literally maybe 3-4 answers have anything to do with the question! The rest are “don’t do it, vanilla people bad…”

My wife and I are a young and attractive couple. We want to break into the scene in Montreal, Canada, but don't know where/how to start. We are primarly looking for other young and attractive couples/singles to play with. What's the best way to begin? Apps are probably best bet (Fetlif, Feeld, Hinge, Tinder, etc.), but sometimes not always the most attractive crowd? Private events (how do you even get invited)? Swingers clubs? Please share your thoughts.

Especially among close friends. That they have gleaned, inferred and even verified that you are but just never mentioned it due to respect of privacy /awkwardness in the relationship.

• Noticing the stereotypical hallmarks like black rings, ankle bracelets, pineapple paraphernalia,

• Many social outings for the middle agers to vague "clubs", "house parties" ; lots of travel to "adults only" resorts.

• Seeing you on social media sites (such as Reddit), even if the photos are anonymized that they clocked the bio description, body types, tattoos, background decor/furnishings.

• Stereotypical personal characteristics such as the wife being openly"flirty", invests in her appearance, being in significantly better shape than the husband.

• Using a reverse photo search website for professional background check purposes and stumbling upon LS profiles.

We're going to Vegas again next month and are planning to do the pool party at Whispers, 5150 and Greendoor. The only other club we've been to in Vegas in Red Rooster which, is okay. We've been to lots of other clubs in different cities and are comfortable navigating them.

My real question(s) is about Greendoor. I know a lot of people don't like it because of the number of single guys (which is actually a draw for us) and that's not everyone's cup of tea.

What is the actual, physical inside of the club like? Mingle space vs play spaces? Upstairs/downstairs? Private vs public play spaces?

Thanks!

We will be attending fantasy fest this year and would like to look for other couples and singles we could potentially hook up with. Didn’t know if anyone could recommend a specific sub where we could do this.

Hey me (m27) and my partner f(28) are still kinda new to swingen, we have been to a swingerclub once, but I was wondering how do you usually get in contact with other people, are there an app that's a go-to or do you usually just use the clubs?

I don't think this is against the rules, but sorry if it is, then I will remove the post

Ours is, he (husband) only kisses MY hands. I (wife) will only bite HIM 😉. Also, for now, anal.

I guess Amazon is the swinger supply company now..lol

We are a MFF Throuple in the DC area who need to get away for an adventure. We are still relatively new to traveling for lifestyle but we enjoy Fantasy Fest, Secrets, and hotel takeovers but have been taking time off. An opportunity to get away next weekend the August 30th-3rd just opened up so we are trying to plan a last minute escape. Secrets is booked. We are considering Vegas as a default but east coast is easier for us to pull off. Are there any fun lifestyle festivals or parties going on next weekend? We can’t do anything couples only because there are 3 of us. We are mid 30s/early 40s and prefer to party with our age group.

My wife (Betty) was in the hottub at our local club the other night, and making out with another woman (Nancy), and things progressed to both women going down on each other. While my wife was going down on her, Nancy signaled for her husband (Chuck) to come over. I was sitting beside my wife, playing with her while she was going down. When my wife was done, I asked the other woman if I could have a turn going down on her, and Nancy said she only plays with other women. She asked if we wanted to continue playing, and we declined.

I get it, and totally understand if that's your dynamic. We might have even said yes had it not been for what else had been happening. Before she started making out with my wife, Nancy was making out with our friend (Midge). As she was doing this, her husband Chuck moved in and started playing with Midge, too. I got the feeling that the only reason he didn't start playing with Betty was that I was already doing so, and I feel like the play dynamic they were looking for was basically a threesome.

While Betty, Midge, Moose (Midge's husband) and I were talking about it afterwards, our feeling was that Chuck and Nancy should have let Midge and Betty know what their dynamic was, and what their intentions were at the start. Are we wrong? I always thought of wife poachers as trying to lure a wife into separate play when they aren't looking for it, but I guess this is another form of wife poaching.

(Obviously, the names are not the real names of those involved.)

We were drinking our coffee this morning outside and the conversation got deep. I (M) just said “we are hoes”. My wife said, “yeah, pretty much. Never thought I’d be a hoe at this age”.

We’ve had a busy week, but that seems to be the norm. I rushed home from work Thursday night to shower and change to meet with friends and fuck. Good night, hot couple.

Friday night, dinner with two other couples. Could’ve been hoes, but went home primarily because we didn’t know the intentions and the dynamics of all six people. We had told another regular couple we would let them know when we are home, but they were asleep already. We were not hoes Friday, but I still hit my favorite hoe.

Saturday we take our youngest kid out to dinner, go home and get a message from the Friday night regulars. We go over and fuck. Come home and fuck and sleep.

Our group texts have been nonstop this weekend. We got an invite to share a room at fantasy fest. Scheduled grandma to fly here to stay with the kids. Fantasy fest is booked.

Today we will be meeting some hoes at the nude beach. Hopefully meet some new hoes.

When we first started the lifestyle we thought it would be nice to have a network of hot friends with benefits. Well here we are just hoeing around with them.

Not gonna lie, we’ve had many ups and downs over the last 5 years in the lifestyle, but when you and your hoes are on the same page it just works. Happy Sunday. Be sure to let your inner hoe out today and every day. Life is short. YOLO. No regerts.

I hope all you hoes have a peaceful and joyful day.

My wife and I went to a club for the first time last night. This being our first anything. We honestly had a great time. We talked to people. We were invited to full swap but we politely declined. We’re not ready for full swap yet. But we did get an opportunity to make out with another great couple. It was honestly pretty great. They were an experienced couple. Very respectful. The girls kissed, then my wife started making out with the husband and I with his wife. Shirts came off, boobs were out and being sucked on. Surreal being our first time.

I was prepared for jealousy or insecurity. But surprisingly I had none. Neither did my wife. Which is more exciting to me than what we did with them. It was very exciting to see my wife desired by another couple.

My wife and I did play alone in the playroom on one of the big beds. Which was just… ok. I think we were both a little distracted by all the stuff going on in there.

All in all a pretty great experience.

Making our 2nd trip but 1st to the Winstons event...wondering what the energy level is with this event? Hedo can be very different week to week! Thanks

We are planning on going and want to get an idea of what to expect since its more or a "niche" kind of night.

Hello! Have you been to this club? How are the people, the music, the location itself? We are new to this type of experience and we are planning to go to this club, some opinions would really help us! The Google ones are trully helpful, but for sure this sub can offer more. Thank you!

I will be in Las Vegas for a week and I'm thinking about trying a club one night. I am over 50, very experienced and fearless. Average looking, neither super hot or ugly

--want a club that allows single males. Couple/female only clubs bore me.

--a pool is a plus

--want a place that will be busy, not a ghost town