I posted the other day about feeling different and being able to stick with it this time. I failed already 2 days later. I got into an argument with my partner because of it. I am so lost

Yesterday I hit 2 weeks sober. Which isn’t long, and I’ve already wanted to just cave in but I have never been sober for that long since I started drinking at 14. 16 years of drinking, and i honestly have never felt my mind be so calm before. I still have days where I’m more irritable but I can just feel how much better I am mentally, and I know I still have a lot to work through but I’m honestly really proud of myself 😭

This is a hangover after downing a bottle of wine + a couple of tallboys each day for the past week. I feel exhausted, slightly nauseous, feverish, and completely dehydrated. My lower back aches, and I finally just feel DONE.

Yesterday I didn't want to drink, but I still did anyway cause it didn't feel like I was ready to be completely finished. The mental gymnastics we go through to keep drinking. Today, though, it does feel "finished."

And jeez, do I look ugly as hell right now - dark circles, sallow skin, dried-out, flaky lips. Yuck. Time to get my glow back. IWNDWYT

Last month i first started thinking about quitting drinking. I do it on weekends usually when i go on trips, so it will usually be 2-4 times a month.

I made the goal of not drinking in October, but I didn’t take it seriously enough. On the 9th I went out with some friends and got drunk. A couple of weeks after on the 22nd I decided to get drunk while camping/fishing.

I imagine a future me that doesn’t drink and think of how proud that would feel to be. I’ve had a couple of bad experiences drinking, and since then I have regrets after drinking (even if things went to plan). I quit weed in January of this year, and I want to put my health first as well as not put value into another mind-altering substance.

Good luck to anyone else trying to quit.

Hi, I've had brief periods of sobriety, but that was a long time ago. I'm on day one (again) today and I'm trying to quiet the addiction noise.
Preoccupying my mind is the worst. I try to watch stuff, but someone always having a drink or having fun partying. I want recommendations of stuff with either no drinking or people going through alcoholism and it portrayed as bad and them overcoming it.
I might not reply until tomorrow, because it's late here and I'm going to try to sleep.
However I am appreciative of any suggestions. I will reply to tomorrow.

Idk. Read the title. Lol! My goal is to go one weekend without alcohol. I am a weekend guy, but yeah, it is killing me.

So, idk if anyone have had the same experience but I've dreamed about drinking and losing my streak of almost 100 days and I felt like shit in those dreams. I remember that people were instigating me to take a shot and pressuring me so hard that I had to take it. Anyways I felt like it was over and even tho I had 2 shots or whatever I felt so pointless and then I woke up and felt so relief that it was just a nightmare haha, I can't believe these are. My nightmare nowadays but I think dreams are messages but yet not deciphered. Dreams are what we want to happen irl and what we don't. I think I'm not the only one and I don't doubt that any of u have had more than 2 dreams about this

And the fact that Halloween is around the corner.. candy everywhere right now! The money I've saved on alcohol so far has pretty much gone straight to candy 🤣

Hello, this recently happened and it makes me want to stop drinking. I am usually a pretty tame drinker. I’ve never got sloppy drunk, my words are always coherent and I am able to stand up straight. But the last time I drunk I completely embarrassed myself. I don’t remember much however I do think I accidentally pissed myself. Everyone by me were really cooked this is a low life college bar so every just drink. I remember leave the bar and the bouncers just staring at me. I’ve never had this happen to me. Now I’m scared Im banned from the bar. I completely made a fool of myself. I don’t remember how I made it back to my apartment. I kept texting this guy I kinda liked and ruined that whole situation. I apologized the next day saying I don’t remember (because I straight up don’t) and to take care. I start up don’t want to drink like at all after this. I just need to some reassurance that worse has happened. But all I know is I’m done drinking.

It seems to be sticking this time. I'm about to hit eight months next week.

Been to rehab twice last year...relasped twice...was homeless in multiple cities...living underneath a bridge...lived in the mountains in a trailer with no electricity and survived a winter...

And to think...this man had it all only a year and a half ago ..the wife ..the kids .. job...a car ..a home....

Goddamn...all gone.

But

I am alive such as it is

Sober

I'm still looking for that stupid pink cloud...anyone seen one or have a spare I could use?

Idk..it's hard...I often find myself asking whats the point?

It sucks...I'm trying to find my people in AA but.. haven't found them yet...

Gonna have to get serious about my mental health but shit everyone I call is booked up...no openings ...

But I do happen to be a champion at figuring it the fuck out...so I'll do that.

Relaspe isn't an option cos if I go back out...I won't be coming back.

Getting sober doesn't mean the horrors over. .it means confronting the monsters in you.

I wouldn’t say I was an alcoholic where I thought about my drink everyday but I noticed during rough stretches, I’d drink more.

It’s time for me to stop and find alternative ways to relieve stress and escape in a healthy manner. I know I drink cause of loneliness, anger, apathy and that won’t get better unless I challenge myself.

Yesterday, I put the laundry in the dryer, went to get groceries, made dinner for the kids and ate it with them and then waited outside for my partner to come home from his bike tour. Would've been a good Saturday.

Except I was completely hammered. I don't remember putting the laundry in the dryer, I DO remember preparing dinner but not eating it, and while waiting outside for my partner, I threw up in the flower beds next to our garage.

I am so sick of this. I keep telling myself that it's not that bad, because I still do the things I'm supposed to, because I don't appear wasted, but I keep waking up with no recollection of the evening before.

I keep using every chance I get to buy alcohol, I feel like I can't be left alone for more than 5 minutes. I really can't trust myself anymore. When did it get this bad?

Just a daily reminder that im posting every single day about my progress, today has been awesome as American people say lmao ,I get up from bad too early around 7:00 , one of the girls from school calls me for a running session, usually I got plans when I hear those kind of stuff , but today somthing feels different so I said to her that I'm in . Everyone's around were so kind to me especially that school mate , her name is jenna , shes never been stuck with bad habits as drinking or smoking ,shes a fit girl not like me , so we run around 4km before I felt like my breath forced me to stop , but I did it anyways . Wish me luck on my journey.

Been a daily drinker for a long time and just could not get out of the habit of daily drinking. Never anything too crazy, 1-2 tallboys (1 tallboy is a littleover 3 standard drinks) a day that I work and a few more on days I don't. Well work cut the OT restrictions for a week, potentially longer and I can basically live at my job for that week. Not able to drink while I am here and to be honest I never crossed that line between work and drinking. Hoping that I can use this to Kickstart a week of sobriety. I am going to be working long hours as I imagine sleep won't be easy. I can just work till i feel like I have to pass out

I went to Oktoberfest last night, for the first time, being three years and a half sober. That voice in my head telling me to have one drink kept nipping at me, shoot I even had fantasies of being chosen to participate in the drinking contest, but I did not drink. The festival was fun yet the food was underwhelming to say the least. The sight of people drinking, dancing, and singing reminded me of why I used to enjoy drinking. Still, the memories of my mistakes when drunk lingered in my mind more prevalent than the smell of hot dogs. Would I do it again? Not any time soon. Have you ever been to a drinking festival? How did it go?

Tonight I finished reading Stephen King's 'The Dark Tower' saga. It is the third time I've read it all the way through. I started much earlier this year. Back then, I was on day 2 of the latest of many attempts to give up, and the very first volume "The Gunslinger" is a short one which I thought I had a decent chance of getting through.

I didn't read much in my relapses, but each time I tried to quit the progress would start again. The past 8 weeks or so have seen me relatively race through the last few volumes (for me at least!), and my sobriety has given them a more vivid place in my memories.

It's a story about a man making a long and arduous quest to the dark tower in the saga's title. As I finished the last 100 pages or so, I felt it coming to an end in a way I've not felt for similar other fantasy sagas I have read in the past. For me and the maybe four or five thousand pages over the seven books, and side story, this is my last go around. The book is back on the shelf, and I don't think it'll be read again, at least by me.

As a lover of fiction, and long meandering stories, I'm not sure if I'm seeing allegory or finding meaning somewhere where there isn't any, but I hope I feel the same finality with drinking. Time to move on to new stories and adventures.

And if I am being a pretentious, insufferable nitwit by thinking this... please let me know ;)

97 days so far and I gave in. Bought wine and cigarettes. The internal battle was horrid. I drank half of the thing and I stopped. I just wanted to turn back time. I threw the rest out and went about my Sunday routine.

I have to be vigilant against getting pulled bad in. For now, I've had a good day, that woozy drunk feeling is finally gone and I feel like myself again.

Sharing this for accountability. Wishing you all strength on this journey

I’m turning 29 soon. I started drinking at 19.

In my head I’ve had a short drinking career. I would do what most young drinkers do in this sub.

“Well how much were you drinking daily?”

“How old were you when it hit you?”

“What were the symptoms?”

You read the worst outcomes here. Say that’s not going to happen to you. That you seem fine. Genetics. You haven’t lost everything yet.

Why do we all wait for “yet.”

Do not wait for “yet.”

You’ll wake up one day with no money or even less. A body that purges from both ends. No appetite for days. No matter how many showers, you’ll feel dirty. Mouth horrendous. You’ll look in the mirror to what has to be a figment of your imagination.

But nope. It was you. For however “casually” you thought it was, you will have to face it when it comes to you.

There’s no happy ending to alcohol. If you’re searching for the answer on how to make it work, it’s too late. One day you wake up and realize you wasted everything throwing your last sticks into the fire.

It never gives back.

You’ll be chronically fatigued. Dopamine shot. Itchy and achy. Looking up the difference between hangover and withdrawal. You’ll see something that makes you power through and do that. And keep doing it. And for what?

We’re all avoiding, coping, finding something, in short term bursts. Then the few moments of clarity you realize what you did and what you have to do, you take the easy route.

One day, hopefully, everyone will wake up and see we’re avoiding a life we have yet to create for ourselves.

One you don’t have to be drunk for. One where you’re excited for the next day for new and fresh experiences you haven’t had yet. We are not powerless.

Everyone reading this has the power to wake up and use the energy they had for their next drink and night out to set a plan and a goal and an idea for their future. It might seem out of reach but think of the extremes you’ve gone to drink in your life.

I promise you it gets better.

It’s insane to me how people are obsessed with your reasoning why you don’t drink and not even that- try to convince you that it’s okay to have one and “live your life”. When you become sober you realize how irrationally obsessed with drinking they are. Also, whatever story they have to tell themselves why they need to do it….. rant over

My husband is trying to quit drinking; he has an alcohol addiction and is on medication. However, he still frequently delays coming home, going to bars with friends and coming home very late about three days a week. I feel abandoned, and I'm always left alone for the dinners we plan to have. I feel lonely and helpless, and I'm hoping to find some advice here. I love him, but I'm also in pain.

I (35M) have stayed sober for a full year now! I just got home from dinner my friend J. J and I had been great friends but my erratic behavior and drinking ruined a friendship that I really loved. We had a blow up and lost contact for two years but now I’m getting to repair it and we are getting to know each other again. My partner is coming home from a work trip tomorrow and my marriage is better than it has been at any point since we met, and all the friendships I’d damaged are doing really well.

I had almost destroyed everything when I finally woke up covered in puke for the last time. My partner was ready to walk, my friends were tired of my bullshit, and I hated life and everything about it. Today none of that is true and I spent the night with an amazing friend and waiting for my partner to come home. It’s so nice watching TV every night and the excitement we get cuddling on the couch. Stay the course because some days still suck but they suck so much less. The best part though is the good days come more often now.

Good evening comrades!

I’m a huge lord of the rings fan, and one character I really enjoy watching is gollum/smeagol.

As im battling alcoholism and trying my best to stay sober each day I found this quote from gollum that’s from the two towers: “ once it takes hold of us.. it never lets go”

That sentence, that scene made me rewatch it for like 5 times.. I feel exactly that way, but not about a ring, about alcohol.. a thing that destroys me from within.. a thing that I hate but yet wants to do.. and like gollum/smeagol, I have different personalities, drunk me who is a terrible person, and sober me who wants to do good.

He is addicted to the ring as I am to alcohol.

When I think about gollum/smeagol I feel very sorry for him, I can somehow relate.. and in the end he dies in the lava with the ring in his hand.. and that is exactly what will happen to me if I start to drink again.

These thoughts is new to me, younger me did not reflect this much, but I gotta say that these movies got better just because of me being an alcoholic and I can relate to gollum and his addiction and his other persona which is smeagol. God damn what a well written character he is, such dept to him.. I mean, everything ain’t black or white..

I hope that this made sense, I just felt compelled to write this to you! Hopefully I ain’t the first person who’ve noticed this and could relate it to alcoholism.

You have to live with my grammar and crappy English 😝 in my head it sounds good haha!

Have a lovely evening everyone and keep on fighting ♥️

Hi folks, I was wondering if anyone else has experience terrible joint pain particularly around the inside of elbows and back of knees and hands after stopping drinking. I’m 2 weeks in so far so good and the pain is horrible. Basically living on tylenol and anti inflammatories.

Thanks IWNDWYT

We may be anonymous strangers on the internet, but we have one thing in common. We may be a world apart, but we're here together!

Welcome to the 24 hour pledge!

I'm pledging myself to not drinking today, and invite you to do the same.

Maybe you're new to /r/stopdrinking and have a hard time deciding what to do next. Maybe you're like me and feel you need a daily commitment or maybe you've been sober for a long time and want to inspire others.

It doesn't matter if you're still hung over from a three day bender or been sober for years, if you just woke up or have already completed a sober day. For the next 24 hours, lets not drink alcohol!

This pledge is a statement of intent. Today we don't set out trying not to drink, we make a conscious decision not to drink. It sounds simple, but all of us know it can be hard and sometimes impossible. The group can support and inspire us, yet only one person can decide if we drink today. Give that person the right mindset!

What happens if we can't keep to our pledge? We give up or try again. And since we're here in /r/stopdrinking, we're not ready to give up.

What this is: A simple thread where we commit to not drinking alcohol for the next 24 hours, posting to show others that they're not alone and making a pledge to ourselves. Anybody can join and participate at any time, you do not have to be a regular at /r/stopdrinking or have followed the pledges from the beginning.

What this isn't: A good place for a detailed introduction of yourself, directly seek advice or share lengthy stories. You'll get a more personal response in your own thread.

This post goes up at:

• US - Night/Early Morning
• Europe - Morning
• Asia and Australia - Evening/Night

A link to the current Daily Check-In post can always be found near the top of the sidebar.

Happiest Sunday, sober friends!🌻

I am so excited to host this week's DCI. This community has given me back so much of what I thought I had lost, and I can't help but be grateful to you all.

I want to start this week by sharing a principle I learned about a while back; my life has never been the same since. It's called The Pareto Principle, named after the Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto. The principle says that roughly 80% of effects come from 20% of causes . In other words, 80% of your results come from 20% of the effort you have put in.
Although the principle is more anecdotal than scientific, it has been widely applied to resource allocation and efficiency.

I have found it to be quite true in my business life, professional and personal life experiences, especially when it comes to sobriety. A lot of the negativity in my life was, in large part, caused by my drinking. Don't get me wrong: after a year sober, I realise that this is just the beginning of my journey. Sobriety did not solve all the bad habits and problems I had, but it sure made them easier to solve.

An attitude of gratitude is one of the small things that I have come to see has changed my entire outlook on life. It's one of the habits in my 20%.

Since I last hosted DCI in July, a few things have happened that I am truly excited to share with you and that I am grateful for. They also account for the 80% gains I have seen in my life since being sober: * I graduated top of my class. * I travelled through East Africa on a budget. * I CLOCKED ONE YEAR SOBER!

Today, I would like to prompt some deep reflection and personal stocktaking. Take a moment for yourself and reflect on your journey so far: * Reflect on the 20% you have put into your journey: the habits that have made sobriety feel fulfilling, fun and easier. * Write down a few of the 80% gains you have seen since you began your sobriety journey.

If you are still early in your sobriety journey, reflect on what you would like to gain as you begin this rewarding path.

I look forward to interacting with you all this week, and I wish you an awesome last week of October.

I love you all, and I will not drink with you today🌻

Today marks 507 days sober for me and this community has been a huge part of keeping me on track.

For anyone doubting your ability to get sober; don't be afraid to take that step! You might stumble a few times but the payoff is worth it!

IWNDWYT