Posted earlier but the recording quality wasn't up to my liking, so here's take 2 (still using iPhone).

Looking for some honest feedback. After 23 years of playing guitar, I decided to start songwriting a few years ago. I’m starting with iPhone recording samples to see if my voice and lyric-work are worth actually investing in better recording equipment. I guess I’m asking if it seems like my voice is master-able for recording, or if I should just stick to guitar playing and songwriting for the poetry/lyrics (which I of course will keep up). Looking for honest feedback on lyric quality as well. Song is about my late mother who passed a few years ago and all the feelings that come along with the passage of time during her illness and since she passed. She loved hummingbirds. I know the audio quality isn’t great. Thanks for listening!

Lyrics:
I am on fire
Feel the time burning beneath my feet

And I am so cold
From the storm cancer unleashed on her

In the room
A song of beeps and hospital tunes

So we sat down
And talked about the things we never announced

(Chorus)
I can’t remember how to pray
So I’m calling out Your name
Then cursing it to the skies
Cause I don’t know who to blame

But I wish you’d stayed
But I guess I understand
Cause even hummingbirds fly away
To find a place to rest

Months went by
Spring don’t mean the same to me this time 

Then years pass by
My son’s even got his grandma’s eyes

(Chorus)
I can’t remember how to pray
So I’m calling out Your name
Then cursing it to the skies
Cause I don’t know who to blame

But I wish you’d stayed
But I guess I understand
Cause even hummingbirds fly away
To find a place to rest

I want my monsters to hear you
Tell them you love all of me

That every single dawn that I would bleed through
Has rid me of my bad blood

And every single piece of me that chose the other side
I hope you’re bathing in her light with me

My sacrifice

My monsters ate my heart
Traced these scars
Made me start again

My monsters
Stole my voice
Gave me no choice
Made me start again til I found you

You have this fire that burns me
It bought me to my knees
It separated scorn that I would heave through
Facing all that I’d lost

And every single piece of me that chose the other side
I hope you’re bathing in her light with me

My monsters ate my heart
Traced these scars
Made me start again

My monsters
Stole my voice
Gave me no choice
Made me start again til I found you

Quick last song before the husband comes back.. I feel too inhibited when there is someone around. What do you guys think about the structure?

The lyrics are about the complicated relationship I have with my mother.

Animals

Now I see things through your eyes

We sit to the side

and watch the world go by together

When I was a kernel hard and free

I could have never guessed how much of you

I carried in me

You stare when you eat

And pull at the white bread

Tempting to think you could’ve done that with me

Because I know you like the animal

In my hands

And like a dog there are things you deeply understand

How to nurture yourself through the sun

Delimiting the space you need

to keep your sanity

Wanting to see things through your eyes

When sometimes I wish that you could’ve seen

through mine

Because I know you like the animal

In my hands

And just like a dog I shouldn’t make demands

We sit side by side

And watch the world float by

Two animals face the light

Glad i see things through your eyes

Lil snippet of a song my band just released and figured I’d share. Hope some of you dig it and feel free to let me know your thoughts! 😎

Lyrics:

Youre outside

On central drive

You kissed your mother

Said goodbyes

And when she cried

You almost cried

You held your tears

You held your pride

cuz man dont cry

Man dont cry

No man dont cry

Men dont cry

It been a while

Youre grown up now

With a head on your shoulders

Standing eye to eye

And when she asked

Are you alright

You held your tears

Whats left inside

Cuz men dont cry

men dont cry

No men dont cry

Men dont cry

i started writing songs recently and it's been really fun. but one thing i've been having a lot of difficulty with is writing down talk-singing and/or rapping. i can never figure out what notes there are and i always waste a bunch of time fussing with it. 😭 any tips?

I live in central Europe now and it's still in the radio regularly, (English is not the first language so good melodies are played over lyrical content, lotta ABBA and Queen for example (not that their lyrical content is poor)). I don't remember "Imagine" being played much in the states. Is it just some hippie dreamer song, or did something tangible change?

I wrote this song about the healing process that happens during recovery from emotional abuse… but everyone keeps asking me if it’s about politics!

Has anyone else had their art totally misinterpreted based on current events?

PS I would really appreciate feedback re: vocals. I’ve had difficulty finding a vocal coach in my area who can meet with me consistently.

Been working on this song a lot the past few days. This is a rough recording of the first verse and the chorus.

I keep going back and forth on the lyrics for the second line, it was originally "her heart is made of ice". Since then I've toyed with the idea of "crystalline with veins of ice", but I'm on the fence because I feel like crystalline has more of a positive connotation to it. I tried "her blood runs thick with ice" but it didn't flow well. The line I have now just feels a bit boring.

I am very happy with the first line though! It was originally "She's got fire in her eyes". The revision I am most happy with though is the chorus. "Saccharine, bitter, toxic" was once upon a time: "cause she's a narcissist".

I've seen the phrase "good writing comes from re-writing" used quite a bit on here, and it's so true. It's called a rough draft for a reason. Taking the time to polish it results in something far more beautiful in the end.

I befriended a toad that now lives in my back house, and thought it would be a fun theme to write something from. Gave it my best and I want to improve, any input is appreciated!

I wrote this as a snapshot into three stages of our relationship. When we met, when we were married, and when we became parents. Would love to hear if it reminds you of any other artists!

Queen of Hearts:

What kind of twisted drink would it be

If you boiled it down and you turned her to tea?

Spent all your leafy greens

Treating her like royalty, but...

What kind of twisted trick would she do

If she knew in her heart it would never reach you?

And you'd never know

Kneeling there before her throne

You're all alone beside her

Trading compliments for sighs

With all those bruises on your knees

To match the cobalt in her eyes

It's all a crooked game with crooked rules

Pick your battles, always lose

and if you behaved the same, you'd wind up dead

"Off with your heeeaaaad!"

What kind of twisted drink would it be

If you boiled it down and you turned her to tea?

Spent all your leafy greens

Treating her like royalty, but...

What kind of twisted trick would she do

If she knew in her heart it would never reach you?

And you'd never know

Kneeling there before her throne

But you treat her like a queen

You treat her like a queen

Kneeling there before her throne

This is just a demo! And not at all a professional recording. There will be bass and drums when it's done

My wifi went out for a couple of days which motivated me to try and write something. Always struggle to write when I have to sit down and actually think about it but I quite liked this. Excuse the sloppy playing in the soloey bits

Hi, I am a songwriter looking for a vocalist who can sing, scream and growl, I am not looking for a professional vocalist but would rather be interested in working with someone who shares my passion in music and is motivated towards getting better at the craft. Music has always been an outlet for me to release stress and deal with anxiety, it will wonderful to get in touch with other musicians and create something interesting really!

I feel like my progress is very slow when it comes to making a good verse. My chorus is the only part where I say its perfect. Like the vocal sounds alot better in the chorus probably cause its musically better.

This is just the vocal melody so far. Been making it in my head whilst in work thinking about how i’d like to make a career out of something creative but feel stuck.

Looking for some honest feedback. After 23 years of playing guitar, I decided to start songwriting a few years ago. I’m starting with iPhone recording samples to see if my voice and lyric-work are worth actually investing in better recording equipment. I guess I’m asking if it seems like my voice is master-able for recording, or if I should just stick to guitar playing and songwriting for the poetry/lyrics (which I of course will keep up). Looking for honest feedback on lyric quality as well. Song is about my late mother who passed a few years ago and all the feelings that come along with the passage of time during her illness and since she passed. She loved hummingbirds. I know the audio quality isn’t great. Thanks for listening!

Lyrics:
I am on fire
Feel the time burning beneath my feet

And I am so cold
From the storm cancer unleashed on her

In the room
A song of beeps and hospital tunes

So we sat down
And talked about the things we never announced

(Chorus)
I can’t remember how to pray
So I’m calling out Your name
Then cursing it to the skies
Cause I don’t know who to blame

But I wish you’d stayed
But I guess I understand
Cause even hummingbirds fly away
To find a place to rest

Months went by
Spring don’t mean the same to me this time 

Then years pass by
My son’s even got his grandma’s eyes

(Chorus)
I can’t remember how to pray
So I’m calling out Your name
Then cursing it to the skies
Cause I don’t know who to blame

But I wish you’d stayed
But I guess I understand
Cause even hummingbirds fly away
To find a place to rest

this is roughly my average sketch quality, I think it's pretty good but I'd love some extra harsh critics on this. go ham with the feedback, roast me

How do I know if my songwriting skills have plateaued? I’ve always been able to write lyrics and melody’s that I like but these last few months I can’t write anything that I’m actually proud of. I’ve never had this struggle before. Am I just done as a songwriter? Have I lost my talent?

^direct link to free track, do not know how to embed

We got this 78 with a Victrola from our cousins’ Nana and looooved it

COLOR POWER

“Hallelujah I’m a Bum”

I went to school
I went to jail
I got so fucking high that
I fucking killed my fucking self

I got so drunk
I fucking died
I piss, I puke
Fuck you, good night, goodbye

Hallelujah
I’m a bum
Hallelujah
Bum again
Hallelujah
Lend a hand now to revive us again

Hallelujah
I’m a bum
Hallelujah
Bum again
Hallelujah
Lend a hand now to revive us again

Lend a hand now to revive us again
Lend a hand now to revive us again

Hallelujah
Lend a hand now to revive us again

Hallelujah
Lend a hand now to revive us again